Our Feature Presentation:
Philip Williams writes:

KILL PHIL
A rip-roaring tale of blood, death and fanfiction.

Chapter thirteen:
"The Garden of Love"

Beloved Fool sat on the tree stump at the end of the garden. She was singing joyfully:

"In the garden,
Maiden bright
Angel dancing in snow white
And then comes the other to put her to bed,
And her clothes are the same as her gold-covered head"

She looked at Tcutla out of the corners of her eyes.

"Innocence and Experience," she said softly. "It's part of a poem by Phil. I think I've finally got an interpretation of it now."

Tcutla stood in the doorway, illuminated by the light inside. Her form and her sword were black shapes to Beloved Fool.

"Do you like my kimono?" asked Beloved Fool, examining her pure white outfit.. "I don't think it's a real kimono though, it doesn't seem long enough. But at least it's not very restrictive to movement."

"So you're a natural brown?"

"Oh, the hair?" said Beloved Fool, smiling. "I dyed it for the cosplay convention. It used to be an artificial red. I rinsed it out after I finished my meal."

She looked at the falling snow around her.

"Isn't this scene so wonderful?"

Tcutla felt too impatient for idle chitchat.

"Enough of this! I've come here to collect your head!" shouted Tcutla. "You can sit there and let me kill you, or you can defend yourself."

Beloved Fool sighed. She got up off the stump and picked up her sword from off the floor.

"If you insist," said Beloved Fool. "I tried to make polite conversation. I tried be calm. You've come very close to ruining my holiday you know."

"Do you want to go quickly or not?"

Helen pulled out her sword and sliced off a tree branch in anger.

"Shut up! How dare you come here! You insolent little bitch!"

"Ohhh… little miss can hurt a tree. How scary!" said Tcutla sarcastically. "I'm soooo sorry!"

"Do you see this sword here?" said Beloved Fool, holding up her blade. "Upon it's creation, it was given blessings by a great sword smith!"

"That's just a decorative piece of tat," said Tcutla. "This is what I use…"

She walked forward. The snow underneath her crunch under her blood-covered trainers. Crunch…

"The ACROSS Blade."

Beloved Fool did not seem very impressed.

"How uninteresting," said Helen. "I hope that, after such an epic battle with the Krazy 88, you've still got enough strength left to put up a halfway decent fight."

"What a nice garden Beloved Fool," said Tcutla. "As last looks go, you could do a lot worse."

Beloved Fool made a 'Hmph' noise. She did not intend this place to mark final her final days.

Tcutla held out her sword in front of her, the tip pointing to Helen.

Slowly, Beloved Fool raised her own sword into a fighting pose. She walked towards Tcutla. Underneath the wooden clogs she had recently put on, the snow crunched.

Crunch…

The women stood outside of striking distance, their swords another sword length apart. They both moved, and began circling each other. Through their footprints, they ended up making a circle in the snow.

Then they stopped, and paused.

Without noise or warning, both attacked at once. They rushed in, clashed blades, struggled, then separated.

Tcutla and Beloved Fool began circling each other again. They repeated their rush, clash, struggle and separate manoeuvres again and again.

Rush!Clash!

Helen took a few steps back. Tcutla stood still, watching and studying Helen's moves. Helen backed into a tree. Judging by her expression she didn't realise it had been behind her.

Tcutla smiled and charged. They clashed blades again. After several parries and attacks, Helen knocked Tcutla's ACROSS Blade and disrupted the assassins mostly flawless balance. She stepped to the side and slashed Tcutla across the back.

The yellow fabric was torn and a thin line of blood appeared on her back. Tcutla screamed and fell to the ground. Beloved Fool stepped down hard on Tcutla's back. She raised her sword…

Tcutla rolled to the side, and knocked Helen to the floor with her. Beloved Fool landed, mildly dazed, on her stomach next to Tcutla. The two grappled with each other for a few moments before Beloved Fool managed to elbow Tcutla in the face. She reached out and picked up her dropped sword and stood up. At the same time, Tcutla did the same. They both looked at each other, breathing hard.

They both approached each other, cautiously.

At the same time, they both swung. Again their blades clashed. Confident that the ACROSS Blade would eventually cut through the steel of Helen's sword, Tcutla put her strength behind the sword. Incensed by Tcutla's devilish smirk, Beloved Fool put her strength behind a sharp kick to Tcutla's stomach. She knocked the assassin backwards, causing her to land in a shallow koi pond.

"Ha!" laughed Helen. "Silly girl playing with a sword! If you know what it is, perhaps you would like to commit sepeku amongst the tiny little fishies?"

Tcutla stood up, soaked, but no more so than when she'd stepped out of Azure Flora. There were a few pale blobs running off her outfit, and more of them in the water.

"Did you wash off your hair dye in the koi pond!" said Tcutla. "That's gross."

She shook off the disgusting pale lumps of blonde dye.

"Now come and hit me with everything you can muster!"

Beloved Fool did not. She stayed back, circling slowly.

Tcutla rushed in and attacked Helen. Helen dodged a blow to the head, and hit Tcutla in the side with the butt of her sword. Helen then withdrew, keeping a distance away from Tcutla, who turned around to face her foe.

They ran in and clashed again and withdrew. Beloved Fool had a deep cut on her left shoulder, Tcutla's right leg was bleeding. Now, they both realised that their next clash would be the last and final one.

"Ready?" asked Tcutla.

"Yes," said Helen, calmly.

Then one final time they clashed with a dazzling array of samurai swordplay. Tcutla was surprised that Helen's blade had not been shattered under the lightning attacks of the ACROSS Blade. Both women gave everything they had. Helen just missed Tcutla's main body and cut Tcutla's hand in one attack. The swords clashed again and again.

When the air stilled again, they gave each other a last and final look, then swung.

One blade made contact.

After that, both women dropped to their knees.

"I'm pretty tired now…"
"That really was a well-made sword…"

Tcutla fell backwards, Helen fell forwards. Both lay still in the snow.