A Banana A Day
Chapter 2: Demonic Welcome
By: pink neon
"Ugh."
Hades turned her head away from the bickering forms of Gojyo and Goku and shared a look at Hakkai, who in turn, smiled at her. The pair had started arguing over food upon reaching the nearest restaurant when they arrived at the village, which Hades noted was the worst ancient place she had ever seen, assuming she hadn't been to Rome. She thought they had at least a telephone, or television perhaps, but her hopes where greatly crushed upon seeing the simple clothes the villagers where wearing. But the feeling was mutual, that she was sure of. It wasn't surprising, since they don't see a strange bath robed girl accompanied by four guys traipse around town everyday. Gods, they must have thought I was a weirdo…
"Perverted water sprite! That's mine!"
"Says who? You couldn't possibly own this dumpling, do you, Goku?"
"Sanzo bought it for me!"
"Correction: The corrupt monk bought it for us!"
"No he didn't! He wouldn't buy something for a water sprite like you!"
"Is that the only insult you can think of, huh, stupid monkey?"
"I don't see you trying!"
Hades shook her head. Those two are hopeless. She unconsciously took a sip of her water. Or what she thought was her water. Several series of reactions crossed the poor girl's face and she immediately spit out what she drank, gaining the attention of everyone in the table.
Sanzo scowled as he put down the newspaper he was reading a while ago. "I don't think you're permitted to drink my beer, girl," he said icily, his eyes boring holes on Hades' head.
Hades looked flustered. "I didn't drink it on purpose!" she protested. "I thought…well, I thought it was water!"
Sanzo raised a blonde eyebrow. "You don't know the difference between a beer in a can and water in a glass?" he scoffed.
Hades' face turned redder than ever. "I-I…Ok! Ok! So I wasn't thinking straight! No big deal! Did you honestly think I would drink that pathetic excuse for a drink on purpose! Bleh! I don't know how you can stand that stuff!" she said indignantly.
Sanzo glared at her. "Proves how bad your taste is…" he growled. "…And how stupid everyone is in your world. You should bring Goku and Gojyo there."
The two guys mentioned, who had been watching the scene with interest, looked at the blonde.
"Why you droopy eyed monk!" Gojyo sputtered as he rose from his seat. "Are you picking a fight with me!"
Goku, on the other hand, was clueless to the insult. "Where are Sanzo bringing us? Is it somewhere with food?" he asked hopefully at Hakkai, the only sane person he could think of.
Hakkai chuckled. "You see, Goku…"
But Hades interrupted them. "Hey! Don't you guys go interrupting us! I'm not even done fighting with Goldilocks!" she said, motioning to Sanzo. "Go reschedule your own fight later!"
Everyone looked at her.
"Riiiiiight…." Gojyo said, unable to believe what she just said. And I thought I never met someone as crazy as the monk.
Hades looked at Sanzo. "So? You were saying?"
Sanzo sent her an annoyed look. "Do not call me that horrid name," he said, pronouncing each word slowly, sending chills down everyone's spine.
Smiling far too sweetly for her own good, Hades replied, "Ok, insufferable monk."
Sanzo angrily pulled out his gun. And the rest, as they say, is history. The innocent diners in the restaurant all looked fearfully and shocked at the group and the owner was nervously twisting his hands on his back, afraid to talk to Sanzo.
Now who's behaving like a wild animal? Hades would have loved to say that out loud but decided against it. After all, what could be more frightening than an irritated blonde monk? A Sanzo with a gun.
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Having had enough practice convincing parents to buy the latest car or add another gold credit card to her collection, it didn't take a while before Hades finally persuaded Sanzo to loan her his Three Aspects card to go buy "some" necessities, namely; clothes, shoes and things for personal hygiene. Of course, it would have taken longer if it weren't for Hakkai's help and a few tips from Goku, who knew the rules of "How to get a monk to buy you food" by heart.
"Are you sure you don't need my help?" Gojyo had said before she had left the inn they were staying that night. But Hades had refused, knowing the redhead only wanted to see her try out clothes and see how well she looked on it.
So here she was, exploring the small shops around town, hoping to come across good finds. Hades looked around the brightly lit room of "Mia's Clothing Shop". The words were written in Japanese, but having had a language tutor ever since she was young, translation was a piece of cake for her.
Hmm. I think I look good on this one. But...the red looks so much better…Hades frowned at herself in front of the full length mirror. No matter what she did, the clothes she had tried on looked like they just came from a Chinese antique shop. Maybe I should improvise a little…
A few hours later, Hades Greich entered the inn, dressed in something resembling flared jeans and a tank top that have the words "I see dumb people" she had painted in Japanese, only, the material was made of something different. A bright colored scarf was also tied to her waist.
The four guys stared at her.
"You look cute," Gojyo said, grinning cheekily from his position on the bed.
"You look stupid," Sanzo, who was smoking by the window, told her. "I only allowed you to use the card to buy clothes to stop making you look weird, but now you look weirder."
Hades stuck out her tongue at him. "I didn't ask for your opinion, Sanzo-sama," she snapped as she sat on the foot of one of the two beds.
"By the way, we're not going to share this one room, are we?" Hades asked, dreading the answer.
Hakkai chuckled. "Of course not," he said at the same time Gojyo said "Yes". "We managed to get three rooms. Now all we have to do is split them up."
"I'm not going to room with Gojyo!" Goku, who had been busy eating meat buns earlier, exclaimed.
"And I know you know I want to," Gojyo said sarcastically. "I'm all up for Hades."
Hades wrinkled her nose. Somehow having a pervert inside sleeping quarters was not so appealing to her. "No! I get the room by myself," she said.
"No fair!" Goku said indignantly.
"Sorry, Goku dear. But I am a lady. And you are all guys. So I get the room," Hades said, knowing no one could object. Except of course…
Sanzo scowled. "Are you forgetting something?" he drawled. "Who's paying here?"
"You have no manners whatsoever, banana head!" Hades retorted, crossing her arms. "Haven't you heard of the term 'Ladies first'?"
Hakkai held up his hands and decided to play peacemaker. "Now, now. Let's not argue. Why don't we settle this in a game? Whoever the winner is gets the spare room," he suggested.
Gojyo smirked. "Poker?"
Sanzo rolled his eyes. "So Hakkai can win?" he said sarcastically.
"Why not Paper-Stone-Scissors?" Goku recommended.
Hades grinned. "Paper-Stone-Scissors it is," she said.
"Alright then," Hakkai said, agreeing.
"Paper Stone Scissors!"
"Paper Stone Scissors!"
"Paper Stone Scissors!"
Silence.
" I can't believe I lost!" Goku wailed, pouting.
Hades glared at them. "Why on earth did Hakkai win? I thought he was just good at poker?" she asked irritated.
"He has the best luck of us all. You don't know how many times he won these kind of games," Gojyo told her.
Hades sighed. "Alright. So the bed goes to Hakkai."
Behind him, someone, or something "Kyuuu"-ed, causing Hades to scream.
"And Hakkuryu," Gojyo said.
After recovering from the shock of seeing something that might have passed as a white dragon, Hades, afraid to even touch it, said, "Hakkuryu? Is that the c-creature's name? Where did it come from?"
"Don't you know?" Goku said, looking confused. "It's Hakkai's. Haven't you seen Hakkuryu before? He's been with us all day."
Hades looked like she had just been run over by a car. "What?"
"The car we've been riding on, that's Hakkuryu," Gojyo pointed out, enjoying Hades' reaction.
Hades' jaw dropped to the floor. "Are you trying to tell me that a jeep can turn into an-an animal! That's-that's preposterous! It's just like saying that the moon came down on earth!" she exclaimed.
Sanzo merely raised an eyebrow. "No one is forcing you to believe this, so shut up already," he muttered darkly.
Hades glared daggers at him. "Easy for you to say," she mumbled.
"Because I'm not a coward like you?" Sanzo said.
"Excuse me? If you haven't noticed, I was quite traumatized here!" Hades said, huffing.
Gojyo snickered and even Hakkai managed a smile.
"Ok, so back to the room topic. Who's going to share whose room?" Hades said.
"Not the monkey," Gojyo said as soon as the question was asked.
"I'll pick Goku!" Hades said immediately. She didn't want to share rooms with Sanzo or Gojyo. And since Hakkai was out of the question, Goku was the only one suitable for a room mate.
"Aw! What about me? I'm hurt!" Gojyo said, pretending to die. "You dare leave me in the evil clutches of the corrupt-"
Before he could complete his sentence, Sanzo had already used his beloved fan.
Hades laughed as Gojyo muttered curse after curse.
Hakkai smiled. "So Goku it is," he said. "I'm sure Gojyo and Sanzo will go along pretty well."
Hades grinned. Too bad she didn't know Goku snores. Really loud.
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Hades tossed and turned. She tried counting sheep, singing songs softly under her breath and even listing insults to hurl at Sanzo in case the need rises, but to no avail. She could simply not sleep. Oh, how she envied Goku, who was the cause of all her distress.
No wonder Gojyo don't want him as a room mate! He snores so loud, he's like a ship! Oh, my poor ears!
So she just stared out the window and thought about her new life. Questions filled her head as she thought about her family's safety, how worried they probably were about her, how she could pass the school year due to her absences, how long she will manage to stay alive with these four.
But that's when she started hearing noises. At first, she thought she was just hallucinating or that this might be the effect of sleep overtaking her body, but as she listened, the sound grew louder. It sounded exactly like footsteps. But who could possibly be awake at a night like this?
Hades' heart thumped loudly in her chest as she heard the door to her room crack open with a squeak. Damn! And I thought Goku locked the door!
Ordering herself to calm down to better assess the situation, Hades closed her eyes and pretended to sleep.
"Wake up!" A hand crept up to her shoulder.
Hades opened one eye. It was Gojyo.
"Holy shit! Don't go scaring me like that! I thought there were intruders!" Hades told him angrily. "What the hell are you doing here?"
Gojyo sighed. "Good, you're up. Now if we could only wake up the monkey and Sanzo won't have a fit for once. I hope," he said.
Hades frowned. "And just why are we getting up? Surely, you're not thinking of traveling in the middle of the night, eh?" she inquired.
"No," Gojyo replied as he moved toward Goku's bed and tried his best to shake the brunette out of his slumber, but to no avail. "They damned couldn't wait until morning for us to make them toast. And I was in the middle of a very nice dream too. Oh, well."
"I still don't get you, you know. Who do you mean by 'they'?"
"Demons," Gojyo said simply.
Hades' eyes widened. "You mean, they're really real? No kidding?" she said in disbelief.
Gojyo smirked. "As real as the Merciful Goddess." He said.
"But why on earth are they attacking us?" Hades asked.
"I really like to chat with a beautiful girl like you, but we need to hurry up or we'll miss all the action. Don't want Sanzo and Hakkai to finish off our share of demons, right?"
Hades, still stunned by the sudden "attack" which she really have no idea about, could do nothing but nod her head.
"Wake up, stupid monkey!" Gojyo shouted, shaking Goku's shoulders and yelling at his ear.
At that same time, the windows shattered, to Hades' horror, and in came several demons, all looking at them with the need to kill written on their faces.
"There you are! Now, Sanzo-ikkou, DIE!" one of them said. And then all hell broke lose.
Some of the demons went to attack Gojyo with their claws, but Gojyo brought out a long, weird looking weapon, with a crescent blade attached to chains, which he called shakujou. He effortlessly sliced them to pieces, smirking and throwing insults all the same. Goku, on the other hand, rose from his bed, whacking demons that came close to him by his outstretched hands.
"I thought he was asleep!" Hades said, surprised.
Gojyo grinned. "He is," he replied.
Hades gaped. "Freaky!" she said as she dodged a demon's attack and sent a roundhouse kick at another one.
"You're so full of surprises. I didn't know you know martial arts," Gojyo told her as he stabbed another demon on the stomach. In a flash, the demon dropped dead.
Hades smirked. "Surprises, huh? Expect a lot more," she said. "As for the martial arts, I had been training for only two years, so don't think I'm an expert on this kind of stuff. I only know the basics," she admitted as she punched one demon. Her expression grew to something akin to disgust.
"Ughhhhhhh! Do you have any idea how gross this whole fighting thing is? Sure, I've fought with a few kidnappers, people from school and fellow martial artists, but-but never something like this! Why can't demons make their skin smooth and not so…so nauseating? Oh, gods, I think I'm gonna be sick!" she said.
Gojyo laughed. "You'll get used to it."
Hades sighed. "I hope so, because I really don't want to retch whenever we're forced to battle things, I mean, creatures such as these!"
Having finished the last one, the pair found Goku once again asleep on the floor.
"Seriously! How was he even capable of defeating those demons while asleep?" Hades asked incredulously as they left the room in search of Sanzo and Hakkai.
"Oh, as much as the high level of his stupidity, the monkey is quite a good fighter. He beat a lot of tough people, you know," Gojyo said as they passed down the stairs. Hades had sworn there was some sort of proud expression on his voice.
Hades took one look at their door. "Are you sure it's alright to leave him there, unharmed?" she asked.
Gojyo snorted. "Unharmed? The boy can pack a powerful punch, awake or not. Although of course he's much stronger when awake," he told her.
Hades shuddered. "I do not want to get on his bad side," she muttered.
They opened the door to Sanzo's room and found it empty. Hades noted that there were a few bullet marks on the wall in Sanzo's room.
"And Hakkai? He's not in his room either," Hades said. "Where are they?"
"Outside."
When they ambled out of the front doors of the inn, they were greeted by the sight of Sanzo finishing off a horde of demons, looking as bored as can be, and Hakkai was using some kind of bright energy from the palms of his hands. Hades could only stare for so long until a gray haired demon came and attacked her.
"Whoa! What's that bloody thing you're doing, Hakkai?" Hades shouted over the noise of the battle.
Hakkai smiled. "It's called Qi, Miss Hades," he replied politely.
"Well, whatever that is, it's so awesome! Mind if you teach me how to do that sometime?"
"My pleasure."
Hence, Hades kicked, punched, blocked, hit and fended off attackers, trying her best to remember all those things that her martial arts teacher Keiichi taught her. At first it was hard, since her parents forbade her to continue the sport in order to concentrate more on her studies, but as time passed the skill came back to her piece by piece. Finally, only a few were remaining.
"Watch out!" Gojyo called, but seeing as the call wouldn't reach Hades in time, he ran and stabbed the demon about to slash Hades to bits from behind.
"Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!" she screamed.
The monk sent her an annoyed glare before finishing off the last demon. "Can't you keep quiet for just a second?" he snapped.
"W-well, sorry, Mr. I'm-always-suffering-from-PMS!" Hades spat, the expression of horror still written on her face. "If you haven't noticed, that freaking water sprite just cut off my hair! I repeat, my beloved, wonderful, shiny HAIR!" It was true. If before her black hair was resting until her waist, now it only reached half way.
Gojyo backed a little from her. "Hey! Is that all you think about? It's just hair, you know. You should be ashamed of saying that to the one who just saved your life!" he told her.
Hades was close to crying now. She knelt down and picked up the small chunks of hair that fell. "Just hair! How could you say that! You don't have any idea how long I've been taking care of my hair! My conditioners and shampoos are very expensive too, you know! And it would take months before my hair grows back to the way it was before! Oh, forget it! No matter what I say, you wouldn't understand me anyway!"
Sanzo gritted his teeth. "If you don't stop your incessant chattering, woman, I may be forced to shoot my last bullet on you."
Hades, who was too angry to be provoked, stomped her foot and glared at Sanzo, for the umpteenth time. "Are you threatening me, you insufferable, arrogant prick? I thought you wouldn't want to waste any of your time or bullets on your truly?" she retorted.
Sanzo pointed his gun at Hades' throat. "Shut your trap or die!" he bellowed. Luckily, Hakkai came to the rescue. Still smiling, he motioned for Sanzo to calm down.
"Now, now, Sanzo, don't get too angry. After all, Hades is dealing with a very important issue right now," Hakkai said.
"Important issue? It's quite the opposite, in fact," Sanzo growled, but pocketed his gun all the same.
Gojyo, feeling that Hades' hate for him was transferred to Sanzo, simply couldn't resist. "My, my, someone's getting touchy," he teased.
Sanzo turned to Gojyo, giving him his icy glare.
Gojyo gulped. He loved himself too much he decided he couldn't bear to let Sanzo harm his good looks. I'm simply doing the women a big favor. "Geez! I was just kidding!" he said, holding his hands in mock surrender.
"Hmph."
"I'm going back and sleep. And someone better not touch my hair again," Hades said, looking pointedly at Gojyo. With that, she walked off. When she reached her room, she made sure to shut the door behind her with a loud Boom! She didn't particularly care that she was acting like a five year old. If it was her beauty that was harmed, everything else must be put aside.
She sat down on the lumpy bed and surveyed herself with a mirror.
"Why are you banging the door so loud? It hurt my ears! Oh, darn! I'm so hungry!"
She turned around and came face to face with a messy haired, half-sitting Goku who was rubbing his eyes and yawning.
"Did I wake you up?" Hades mentally slapped herself for saying that. No duh! Of course I did! Ugh! What a stupid question!
"Kind of," Goku said. "Why're you awake?"
Hades beckoned Goku to sit at the foot of her bed and then spent a minute or so explaining to him precisely what happened, including the bit about her hair being cut off.
"That's so bad! It's so like Gojyo to do that, even if it is an accident. I also felt like that when Sanzo forced me to allow my hair to be cut by those monks back at Shangri-La." Goku told her.
"How come you're with Sanzo anyway? And why do you call him your sun? He doesn't look like a family relative or something, because really, you're so much cuter than him!" Hades said, pinching Goku's cheeks.
Goku's cheeks turned pink in embarrassment. "Sanzo set me free from prison. He saved me from being alone. And when I first saw him, he was glowing, so so bright like the sun," he spoke, remembering that very moment wherein Sanzo reached out his hand to him.
"Oh?" Curiosity got the better of Hades. "I don't believe it. I mean, Sanzo's not exactly the type to do charity and contribute something to the good of others…and you, you're too young and innocent. What crime did you commit in order to be sent to such an awful place?"
Goku stared at the floor and for a while, his usual cheeriness level dropped to zero. "I don't know. I don't remember anything about what happened to me before I was put in jail," he whispered.
Hades honestly didn't know what to say. Before, she never had to deal with comforting people with problems. So she opted to remain silent.
Goku then, turned his bright golden eyes at her. "How about you, don't you miss you family, Hades?" he asked.
Hades smiled. "Just call me Hae. I'm more comfortable that way," she said. "Of course I miss my family, Goku. Even…even my annoying brother Seth."
"But-but…" Goku said, frowning, but to Hades, it looked more like a pout. "Hakkai once told me about homesickness. When you miss someone, most of the time you don't act so normal and cheery. But you…you argue with Sanzo and steal Gojyo's food. You don't look like ajudging."
Hades giggled. "It's adjusting, Goku, not ajudging. Anyway, I'm homesick, a little. But maybe, my home just kinda...bores me. You see, that's where I'm always made to stay. My parents disapproved of me traveling unless they're for important reasons. They get so paranoid that someone might kidnap or harm me because of their status. That's probably why now I'm more thrilled to go see new places, new faces."
"Uhhh…I still don't get it, Hades, I mean, Hae. But…yeah…I get it although I really don't," Goku said cheerfully.
Hades laughed even harder. "What kind of answer is that?" she said. "Aww! You're so awfully funny!"
Goku just blinked, not understanding the humor in the situation.
Hades lied down on her pillow and stared at the ceiling. She smiled. "Hey, Goku?" she said. "Do you think you can help me with a prank I'm going to pull on Gojyo? You know, for ruining my hair?"
Goku grinned. "Of course! But will you promise to give me dumplings, and fried noodles, and meat buns and pork and chicken and-"
Laughing, Hades interrupted him. "Alright, alright. I promise I will. Don't worry, I'm sure you'll enjoy what I have in store for our beloved water sprite."
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Gojyo stirred in his sleep. The smell of beer reached his nose. Cracking open his eyes, the sight of Sanzo sitting King style on the chair, reading a newspaper with a beer in hand, was not so surprising to him. He drowsily sat up and just as suddenly, at the corner of his mind, he felt weird, as if something just happened but he couldn't quite put a finger on it.
"Corrupt monk," he called.
Usually, Sanzo never even bothered to reply him whenever he was too engrossed in the morning papers, but surprisingly, he managed an annoyed "What?" And if his senses were telling him, he saw Sanzo smirking. Now Gojyo felt something was definitely up.
"Is there something on my face or what?" Gojyo said.
Sanzo's smirk deepened. "No, there's nothing," he told him.
Gojyo, not trusting Sanzo's words, went to the bathroom, muttering about fan-hitting, corrupt monks. He stared at the mirror. I look perfectly normal. That bald blonde was just probably kidding. Too much beer perhaps. Gojyo winked at himself and ran his fingers through his short hair. Then, that was when he found out exactly what was wrong.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
Short hair! He actually had short hair now! (Think Kenren Taisho style:D ) What happened to his long mane of red locks? How exactly did this happen? He knew of only one person in the world who could do this. Gojyo growled. He was so going to kill her.
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Whoa! You shocked me guys! I never really expected people to review! Thank you so much guys! Glad to know I could torture some people with my evil work (Just kidding!) Hmmm…maybe I should eat chocolate more often! Ha ha!
