The camp was bored. With no enemies to fight, "Eliwood's Elite" would be extremely restless. Unfortunately, Marth had the burden of coming up with fun activities for the group. After 32 such incidents, she just wanted to retreat to her tent and do whatever it is she does in there. Actually, she did just that after the 33rd time. This is when the tactician found an evil idea…
"Go away! Leave me be, you pink-haired spawn of Satan!"
"But I love you, Erky!"
"Come back here so that I can slice 'n' dice your shounen-ai lovin' carcass!"
"Yeah, and I can sell off all your possessions!"
Erk, Serra, Guy, and Matthew were running around the encampment like little kids. The temperamental pyromaniac was trying to escape from the world's most annoying cleric, who was trying to outrun an angry myrmidon and thief. Apparently, Serra must have thought that Guy and Matthew were a couple. They continued making a racket (with clueless yet bored spectators watching in a circle) when Marth emerged with a large blue textbook.
"Hey, people! I've got a fun idea!" called Marth. She was unheard as the daily chaos continued.
"If the tactician'll lemme upgrade to an assassin, I'll finish you off!" yelled Matthew to Serra.
"Got my Killing Edge! You're gonna pay for slander, cur!" bellowed Guy.
"Erky! Save your master!" shrieked Serra.
"Hey, you two! Finish her off already!" snapped Erk, whose patience was quickly running out.
Marth sighed, ready to use Bolting on the foursome… although she could never hit the intended target. She moved through the crowd to get a better view of the chaos.
"Erky! Why are these two cute gay men trying to kill me? They're such a lovely couple!" cried Serra.
"One: they're not gay! Two: who wouldn't want to kill you?" Erk snapped back.
"Don't make me spread slander about you and Priscilla!" yelled Matthew with a murderous look on his face.
"Noooo! Leave Priscilla out of this!" Guy snapped at Matthew.
"What'd you say about Priscilla?" bellowed Raven, who was in the crowd. He leaped out and pursed Guy and Matthew with his sword swinging wildly and dangerously.
Lighting struck in broad daylight and struck poor Lowen. Everyone froze and gazed upon the unfortunate human lightning rod. The cavalier's messy hair was now standing on end. Everyone gasped in horror when they discovered that he had large emerald-colored eyes.
"Soldier… How come you've never said that you had green eyes?" Marcus asked with his voice trembling in terror, as if this was a sign of the approaching apocalypse.
"No one… a-asked me…" Lowen fizzed and sparked a bit before passing out.
All was silent before the stunned tactician spoke. "I-I have an idea to combat the boredom." She moved her cloak over a spell tome to conceal it. Her face was turning hot pink while attempting to hide the tome. "W-we should have a… a play! I've found an interesting one. It's called A Doll's House."
"Who's gonna do what?" asked Nino.
"Let's see… Florina and Hector will be the Lindes. Florina's a widow looking for a job," said Marth.
"A widow, eh? Are you sure it's a good idea to give Florina a speaking role? She doesn't talk, or when she does, it's just quite mumblin'," spoke Hector. He just realized something and it made the big guy furious. "WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE'S THE WIDOW? THAT MEANS THAT MR. LINDE IS DEAD! WHAT DO I DO?" he shouted angrily.
"…Be dead?" she replied. "Trust me, it'll do Florina good to practice being a widow. Plus Mrs. Linde and Nora get into an argument, so it'll be fun to see this unfold!" Marth's words didn't sooth Hector. He simply sulked off while mumbling choice words and displaying choice gestures.
"Um… I'll try my best…" Florina squeaked softly.
"Ok, Sain'll be Dr. Rank. The Helmers will be played by Lyn and Kent. Kent, you're Torvald Helmer and Lyn, you're Nora Helmer."
"W-what? I'm gonna argue with Florina? I'm n-not sure about this…" stuttered a surprised Sacaen.
"Relax, it'll be all right. The maid is Priscilla, the three kids'll be Nino, Ninian, and Serra."
"I have to be a child? Injustice!" screamed Serra.
"It suits you just fine," grinned Erk. This resulted in him receiving a blow to the head with a Sleep Staff. Whether it was the staff's power or the concussion resulting from the blow, Erk was soon out cold.
"Lucius is the nurse. Yes, there are male nurses. (the monk gave Marth a dreadful look.) Nils, you get the cool part! You get to play the lawyer, Nils Krogstad!"
"H-his name's Nils?" asked the said bard.
"Yep! He's a mean lawyer that blackmails Nora, who's played by Lyn. I think you should act like a whiny little brat when the others are on stage, but all evil and money-grubbing when you're with just Nora!"
"'Whiny little brat'? 'Evil and money-grubbing'? I-I'm not sure I can pull this off!" squeaked Nils.
"Be like Jaffar or Vaida for the evil part. (the said units shouted "Hey!" in unison.) Be like Farina for the money-grubbing part. (the pegasus knight stuck her tongue out at Marth.) The whiny little brat part? Come." Marth gestured Nils to her tent.
"I think she really fancies lil' Nils!" said Eliwood.
"And a few others too. Four other allies…," Canas said quietly.
Marth took Nils into her tent, which was something she never does. Nils soon learned why. Her tent had a TV, Nintendo systems, a little mini-fridge, and a wireless laptop. They sat on the cot and Marth pulled up a website.
"I've something to show you." Marth clicked on the drop-down bar and selected the fifth item. "Here, read this starting at chapter five. Take good notes on how to be a whiny little brat, then come out when you're done." Marth hugged Nils and left him there to read.
As Marth came back, Lucius ran up to her.
"Excuse me, but what's the name of my character?" asked Lucius.
"Anne-Marie," she replied. Lucius wrinkled his nose in disgust. "You look more like a Jessica to me." Lucius grimaced, but nodded in acknowledgement.
"What else… Oh! The porter! Farina, would you be the porter?"
"Sure! A good way to make some gold!" mused Farina.
"Since this'll be the first time we'll do this, it'll be more humorous! Enjoy!" Marth stood aside while some people brought in props.
