Author: Arashi (marenski@hotmail.com)
Website: www.kenkaya.com
Author's Notes: Well well well, the grand prize for guessing animals goes to JadeAnime! You got 10 out of 12, nice work! Everybody had some great guesses though! Like I said, just about anything could be justifiable. *grin* As for your prize... uh... here's part 3! I'm glad you guys are enjoying this! It is quite a lot of fun to write!
Disclaimer: I don't own Rurouni Kenshin or Fruits Basket.
-----------------------
"KENSHIN?? Where are you???"
Sagara Sanosuke wasn't sure what to think. It had been a long time, about two hours to be precise, since anything particularly strange had happened to him. Finding Kenshin's clothes anywhere other than wrapped around the former rurouni was definitely strange and more than slightly disturbing. It meant that Kenshin was running around naked somewhere, at the very least. But the question was really 'why' Kenshin would be doing something so obviously contrary to his character. Sano's brain worked overtime trying to solve that mystery while his mouth did the rest.
"Where the HELL did you GO???"
The others had stopped and were staring at the ex-gangster who angrily jumped to his feet, dangling Kenshin's hakama and gi from each hand. The sakabatou fell to the ground with a clatter. Something else tumbled out of the roughly handled clothing and plopped down next to the sakabatou. This new development went unnoticed by the frantic street fighter.
"KENSHIN!!! Get yer ASS back here right now and put on your clothes!!! The hell are you doing running around NAKED!? Kaoru's gonna be FURIOUS when I tell her!!"
Bystanders were terrified. Women and children huddled together and tried to get around Sano without making eye contact. The other ten warriors only stood and stared at him blankly, unsure as to why Sano was carrying around Kenshin's clothes and yelling for the rurouni. The ex-gangster turned to and fro as though he expected someone to pop out from behind a building.
"Sano"
The voice was quiet and strained. Surprisingly, the ex-gangster actually heard it through all his yelling and franticness. No one else did, but it didn't really matter. The only one in any sort of position to be of assistance was the ex-gangster.
"Kenshin? Is that you?" Sano's volume dropped decibels and his movements became less frantic. The others simply assumed that Sanosuke had totally lost his marbles. The former rurouni was nowhere in sight.
"Sano help I can't breathe"
"What's wrong Kenshin? Where are ya?"
Yahiko yelled out, trying to figure out what Sanosuke was up to. The ex-gangster completely ignored him and started glancing around carefully, seemingly talking to Kenshin the entire time.
"What is that moron doing?" Saitoh lit one of his remaining two cigarettes and puffed away contently. "We need to get back to the police station so I can take care of some last minute business and where did the Battousai disappear to anyway?"
"Want me to take care of this?" Enishi reached up and rested his hand on the hilt of his Chinese style sword. The white haired man was in a hurry to conclude their business so he could disappear back to his outcast village.
Saitoh raised an eyebrow, thought for about half a second, and then nodded. "Sure Enishi. Try not to make too much of a mess." The Wolf of Mibu thought it was only marginally ironic that Enishi, a full-blown psychopath, was about to take care of the problem created by someone who was only acting insane.
With the grace of a true predator, Enishi stalked toward the obviously mentally challenged ex-gangster. Sano, for his part, had crouched low again, staring at something on the ground.
"HOLY SHIT KENSHIN!! YOU'VE TURNED INTO SOME KIND OF NASTY LITTLE BUG THING!!!"
Sanosuke jumped to his feet, holding something carefully in his powerful hands.
"We HAVE to get you to MEGUMI! She'll know what to do!!"
Enishi had planned on knocking the ex-gangster out with the flat of his sword, but once the tall man was on his feet things were more complicated. Especially when the ex-gangster barreled straight through the white-haired psychopath as though he didn't even notice him.
"Hold on KENSHIN! Everything will be ALRIGHT!"
Enishi stumbled backwards, bumping into some of the terrified people crouching beside the storefront. Caring hands reached out to keep him from falling, and then all pandemonium broke loose.
A mysterious puff of colored smoke engulfed the small group of women and a moment later, a full-blown, white, Bengal tiger erupted from the cloud with a savage growl. Claws dug into the dirt and the powerful back of the animal arched angrily. Turning its head in the direction of the fleeing ex-gangster, the tiger bounded after him with a roar.
People noticed the strange occurrence, it would have been difficult not to. Where the animal came from, exactly, was unknown. But that wasn't really the issue. The more important issue to the general populace was survival. A mad tiger running amok in downtown Kyoto made people realize exactly how precious their insignificant lives really were. In an instant, the terror and fear that existed during the Bakumatsu was reborn and people fled for their lives.
Even though his mind was whirling with his recent discovery, Sanosuke would have had to be deaf and blind not to notice the commotion. When the general populace all started screaming, "We're going to die" the ex-gangster hazarded a glance behind him. A moment later, he wished he hadn't. A very large ferocious looking cat was chasing him. In the five years he'd spent traveling the world, Sagara Sanosuke had only seen something resembling it once. He'd been at a museum in England and the animal had been stuffed. He decided that alive, the beast was much more terrifying.
"Oh SHIT Kenshin!! We're in trouble!!"
He spoke in the general direction of his cupped hands, but if the small creature inside heard him, it made no replying comment.
"Kenshin?? Kenshin can you hear me?? OH NO! Are you still alive??"
Running full speed, Sanosuke pulled his hands closer to his face and opened them a crack so he could peer inside. The strange organism twitched slightly in his grasp, reassuring the ex-gangster only slightly. He had no idea why Kenshin had transformed and even less of an idea why he was having trouble breathing. Sano felt terrible because he didn't even have any idea WHAT Kenshin had changed into. But he knew without a doubt it was his friend. On the left cheek of the small creature there was a tiny cross-shaped scar.
The wheels in Sanosuke's head started turning as he glanced back at the ferocious tiger chasing him. As strange as it was to have Kenshin magically transform into an unknown animal, perhaps this was something he could use to explain why a giant cat had materialized out of nowhere and started chasing him? Something about the giant kitty was oddly familiar. The fact that it was ignoring everyone around them and chasing after only him seemed quite mysterious as well. What had he done to piss off the scary white tiger?
His thoughts were interrupted a moment later when he collided head on into a group of people.
He wasn't sure if he'd tripped or what, but he knew he was definitely on the ground with something covering his head, blocking the sight of the commotion around him. He was vaguely aware that he'd lost hold of his best friend, and that thought terrified him more than the rabid tiger.
"KENSHIN!" He struggled against the large white sheet that someone had draped over his entire body. When he finally managed to poke his head out from under the strangely heavy material, the sight that befell his eyes was the strangest one that he'd ever seen. Even with everything else going on, somehow he never considered the possibility that the entire world would grow to gigantic proportions.
For a moment, he stared at the evening sky. Around him, huge people were running for their lives. A second later, a massive white tiger leapt above his head and Sanosuke was sure that the thing had at least quadrupled in size.
Glad that it had lost interest in him, Sanosuke jumped to his feet and ran for cover. He decided that he could deal with the giant problem later. Instinct told him to flee and find some sort of protection. As he ran, he felt unbalanced, but it wasn't until he'd tried to catch his breath by leaning his hand against a strange furry tree that he noticed the source of his discomfort. Instead of his familiar bruised, broken, or bleeding hands, he was quite startled to discover a pair of white-feathered wings.
If not for the string of familiar sounding curses, Anji wouldn't have known for certain.
"Sagara-san? Is that you?"
The rooster slowly lifted its head and stared in his direction, its beak opening slightly in shock.
"AAnji? Is that you?"
The giant ox nodded its head slightly, looking almost humorous because of the angle. It was staring straight down at the rooster who was standing between its two front legs.
"It seems I've turned into an ox for some unknown reason" Anji's composure was just the thing that Sanosuke needed to keep him from running around like the proverbial chicken with its head cut off.
"Shiiiiiiiit" Sano held his wings out so he could get a good look at them. "DA HELL?? Don't tell me oh shit shit shit don't tell me I've turned into a damn rooster!!?"
"Fine"
"FINE WHAT???"
"I won't tell you" Anji replied calmly.
"DAMN IT!!!!! What the hell is going ON!?" Flapping his wings in frustration, Sanosuke looked like he was about ready to run off into the crazed traffic.
"Don't go anywhere Sagara-san You're safe underneath me."
It wasn't just Sanosuke who found refuge underneath the large ox. A stray, black dog joined him under Anji's protective body a moment later, panting heavily.
"Oh great!! Just great! Dammit Anji you're attracting all the REAL animals too!" Feathers ruffled in frustration as Sanosuke glared at the newcomer. "Shoo dog! Go find somewhere else to hide!"
"Are you talking to me, moron?" The dog bared its fangs and growled.
"S Sai Saitoh???"
"I'm tempted to snap your neck right now since I'm fairly certain all of this is somehow your fault."
Sanosuke regained enough composure to be indignant. "MY fault? How do you figure?"
"You're the one who went running off and stirred up this ruckus."
"It is not MY fault!! Kenshin somehow turned into a little shriveled thingie!! What was I supposed to do? Leave him there to die?"
"Well if you didn't bump into Enishi the psychopath wouldn't have transformed into a tiger and started scaring everyone."
"Well if YOU hadn't forced us all to come help you maybe none of this would have happened at all!"
Saitoh looked disinterested and casually started scratching behind his ears with his hind legs. "Moron"
"Disgusting Saitoh! Don't tell me you've spent five minutes as a dog and you already have fleas! Damn it, I don't wanna get your parasites!"
"Dog? Who you calling a dog?" Saitoh stopped instantly and took a menacing step toward the rooster. "I am most certainly a wolf."
"Like hell you are Saitoh! You're just a mutt!"
"I'm a wolf!"
"Mutt!"
"Wolf!"
"MUTT!"
"Gentlemen" Anji's voice boomed out, silencing the arguing animals. "Let's try to remain civilized."
Glancing up at the giant ox, Sanosuke and Saitoh both decided against arguing.
"And besides Saitoh-san from where I'm standing, you most certainly are not a wolf. I'm sorry."
Growling again, Saitoh turned away. "Well enough of this nonsense. I'm going out there to try and find the others."
"Oh shit do you think everyone else has turned into animals as well?"
Saitoh gave the ex-gangster a pointed look. "If I were a freeloading street fighter like you, I'd bet my last yen on it."
"Well, this is a fine mess we've gotten in!" Flipping his long flowing mane with a toss of his head, Hiko glanced around at the other gathered animals. His white and red mantle was draped over his broad back, making it fairly obvious that the Hiten Mitsurugi Master had indeed turned into the powerful stallion standing before them.
On his back, a small monkey clutched a mouse in its hands protectively. "You guys don't think we're going to be stuck like this do you?" The monkey looked hesitant.
"No way in hell Yahiko" Sanosuke assured him, from his place on Anji's back.
"But that still doesn't tell us what we're supposed to do now?" The tiny rat piped in. Yutarou was more terrified than he'd ever been in his entire life. "I don't know how much longer I can handle this!"
"Yutarou-kun would probably be at more ease if you'd stop pacing around Enishi" The horned ram glared over at the tiger that had distanced himself from the rest of the group. "You need to understand what your scent and actions would do to someone of his decreased stature." Katsu didn't bother mentioning what it was doing to his sense of well-being.
"Do you want me to eat you, sheep-boy?" Enishi growled as he reluctantly hunched down on the ground. The smaller animals all let out a sigh and relaxed visibly.
Conversing quietly, the dog and the wild boar had their backs turned to the others. Jumping to their side, the friendly rabbit startled them.
"What are you two talking about?" Soujirou seemed least concerned by the turn of events. Even Anji had expressed his confusion and displeasure, but the former assassin somehow thought becoming a bunny was amusing.
"WHA!? Soujirou! Don't freakin' interrupt us when we're tryin' ta talk!" Chou pointed his snout at the rabbit angrily. "And stop jumping around like that! It's pretty damn annoyin'."
"Ooops I'm sorry Chou-san." Soujirou hopped back a bit to give the angry boar more space. "Anyway, what are you two discussing?"
"Three." Aoshi's voice drifted up from nowhere in particular.
"Three?" Soujirou glanced around in confusion until a reptilian head poked up from the grass. "Oh, hello Shinomori-san!"
"Hmph" The serpent's forked tongue flicked out once to taste the air before he disappeared back into the greenery.
From Anji's back, Sanosuke started chuckling. "Damn Aoshi I always knew you were one cold-blooded bastard!"
"Sagara-san" Aoshi stoic voice drifted up from the grass. "Snakes have been known to eat chickens"
"What's THAT supposed to mean?"
"I think it's fairly obvious." The dog glared up at the perched rooster. "Anyway people just because we've turned into animals doesn't mean we should start acting like them."
"Coming from you Saitoh, there's something seriously wrong with that statement! Who goes around calling himself a wolf on a regular basis in this group?"
"Shut your beak." Saitoh barked. "Anyway, I suppose there's something Chou and I neglected to mention to the rest of you."
Ears perked up and various animal heads turned in their direction. As one the whole group asked the simple question. "WHAT!?"
"Pray tell, Saitoh WHAT exactly have you neglected to mention to us?" Hiko dug his hoof into the dirt angrily. "Don't tell us you knew something like this was going to happen?"
"Well, before I say anything I think it might be pertinent to locate the Battousai"
"Holy shit! Kenshin!" Sano flapped his wings. "In the commotion I totally forgot about him! We have to find him! He was in big trouble!"
"Why Sano?" The monkey crawled anxiously onto the horse's head to get a better view. "Did he transform too?"
"Yeah! I'm not even sure what he was, but he said he couldn't breathe!" Sano fluttered down from Anji's back, finding himself only slightly annoyed by the fact that he could almost fly. "We have to go look for him! I dropped him when I transformed!"
The street was completely deserted due to the terror of the ferocious tiger, so the eleven animals didn't have much trouble getting around. Enishi sulked toward the back of the group while Sano and Saitoh led everyone to the last place the ex-gangster had seen the former rurouni turned strange creature.
"I was running right here when I ran into a bunch of people" Sano strutted across his white gi, glancing around on the ground for his lost friend.
"Hmmmm" Saitoh lowered his nose to the ground and took a tentative sniff, eliciting a laugh from the rooster. "Shut up If I'm a dog I might as well make the best of it."
"Ha ha You're a natural Saitoh. You've got the natural instincts of a mutt."
Saitoh only spared Sanosuke one angry look before he went back to sniffing. "And you play the part of a chicken very convincingly. You've got the strut and the constant squawking down."
"Shut up"
"Moron."
Hopping off Hiko, Yahiko helped in the search while Yutarou remained behind, safely standing on the horse's back. Soujirou hopped back and forth calling out "Himura" while Chou stalked around on his stout legs snorting.
A mysterious sound and a puff of smoke drew everyone's attention to a rain barrel positioned on the side of one building. A moment later, the familiar red-haired man burst through the surface of the water and sucked in a large breath of air. He was standing up to his waist in the barrel and when he turned to find the menagerie of animals staring at him he said the first thing that came to his mind.
"Oro?"
"KENSHIN!" Sanosuke ran flapping and ended up lifting off the ground just enough to perch on the side of the rain barrel. "Kenshin I'm so glad you're alright!"
"Sa?" The former rurouni stated as he stared in shock at the animated rooster.
"Oh, that's just like my stupid pupil Making people worry about him needlessly." Hiko snorted and flicked his tail, drawing Kenshin's attention to the mighty stallion wearing his master's mantle.
"Mas?" Kenshin slowly appraised the animals. "Guys?"
"Yup" Sano would have shrugged, but his new animal body wasn't built for the movement. "We all sorta turned into animals just like you. But you turned back! That's great! That means we're saved!"
"Orororororo" Kenshin slumped slowly back into the water and covered his tired eyes with his hand. "Guys I'm not sure what's going on but could someone tell me where my clothes went at least"
"Oh yeah sure They're back over there by Enishi." With one wing, Sanosuke pointed back towards the shop where everything had started. Kenshin glanced over in the direction he indicated, but a moment later each of the animals were surrounded by the colorful puffs of smoke. The rain barrel became unbalanced and tipped, spilling Kenshin and the gallons of cold water.
"AHHHH! DAMN that's COLD!" Sanosuke howled and it was then that Kenshin noticed his friend had changed back into his normal human self. It was somewhat relieving, except for the fact that Kenshin found himself balanced precariously over top of the naked man. It was then that Kenshin remembered he was in a similar situation.
"Orororororo"
"Um Kenshin?" Their faces were a mere foot apart, and neither man wanted to break eye contact with the other, for fear of seeing something they didn't really want to see.
"Uh yeah Sano?" Both men pretended they weren't really in such a compromised position.
"Could you get off of me?"
"Yeah." Kenshin jumped off and backed away, covering his manhood with his hands. Sano rolled over and reached out, snagging his white drawstring pants and pulling them on in a heartbeat. The others were less fortunate and eleven naked men scrambled around the downtown street of Kyoto, looking for their clothes.
"So that's how it is" Kenshin said thoughtfully as they sat around Saitoh's office.
Saitoh tapped his cigarette into his ashtray and leaned back into his seat. "Yes The Souma clan has been cursed for centuries with vengeful animal spirits of the Chinese Zodiac. It seems they found some way to give us the curse instead"
"Those bastards" Sano growled.
"Chances are good, this curse will not be permanent. We should be able to find a way to undo it." Aoshi commented. "Give me a day and I should be able to uncover any information we need."
"I'll help as well." Anji spoke up. "I'm somewhat familiar with rituals and curses." Aoshi nodded his agreement and acceptance of the offer.
"Chou and I will see what we can uncover as well" Saitoh blew a single puff of smoke out into the crowded room. "As for the rest of you I think our main concern should be keeping this problem a secret until we know how to handle it."
Kenshin agreed. "I think it would be best if we do not let the others know about our current situation."
"Oi What do you mean?" Sano pulled his hands from his pockets and took a step toward his red-haired friend. "You mean keep this from Jou-chan and everybody?"
Kenshin smiled somewhat self-disparagingly. "Kaoru was quite angry with me when I told her I was going to help Saitoh with his battle She and the others were very concerned for all of our safety I don't want to worry her any more than necessary. Especially if we'll be able to take care of this problem like it never even happened" Kenshin glanced up at the tall street fighter. "I think it would be most heartening to Kaoru and Megumi-dono if we return from a battle without any sort of injury, that I do."
"Yeah but" Sano glanced around the room, noticing he had everyone's attention and feeling somewhat self-conscious because of it. "I mean what if they find out we turn into animals? That's going to be kinda hard to hide ya know? Especially cause we don't even know what causes it."
Saitoh extinguished his cigarette in his ashtray and returned his amber gaze to the ex-gangster. "Well then that's something you'll just have to find out isn't it?"
-----------------------
Amusing...? At least... slightly? Does everyone sort of understand it now? Don't worry, things will make even more sense in the next chapter. In case you're completely clueless, Kenshin IS the Dragon. (but he's actually a seahorse due to wacky Japanese mythology and the crazy creator of Fruits Basket) Well anyway, that was quite a bit of fun to write. Have I scared anyone away yet? Gomen, ne!
Upcoming Part 4: (previously thought to be the last chapter but now most likely NOT going to be the conclusion) The last little detail about the curse is discovered. It is contact with the opposite sex that causes the transformation. But try as they might, the men of Rurouni Kenshin cannot avoid their women forever. It will sure be fun to watch them try though!
Dang... I've got me a headache from too much time on my computer. Well, I think I'll go take a nap now. I'll be waiting for your comments everybody! They make my day!
