The story so far:

Go back and read Part I if you want to know what happened, because if you're so lazy that can't even read them in order, then I'm certainly not going to tell you! If you already read Part I, well then, what in the name of Hitler's panties and matching bra set are you doing reading this?

All four of the boys stood, unmoving, for at least two minutes. Then, suddenly, they were all released from their stupor with Malfoy's cry of "Kill Dumbledore!"

"Yeah!" they cheered in unison, and proceeded to march down the corridors chanting "Kill Dumbledore! Kill Dumbledore!" like classic mobs are wont to do (even grabbing torches from the walls in raising them in a menacing gesture).

They reached Dumbledore's office and didn't simply say the password (Fizzing Whizbees), but instead poked the gargoyle with the torches until it relented.

They paraded up the staircase and broke down the doors. Inside, Dumbledore and Hermione were leaning towards each other, several heavy books between them….

"STOP!" the mob cried, and Dumbledore looked up.

"OhI'mtoooldforbirthdayparties," he mumbled, then fell to the floor. Perhaps the menacing mob with torches bursting into his office was a little too much, or maybe he just had one too many lemon drops.

Hermion knelt beside Dumbledore's still form and felt for a pulse; her eyes widened in horror. "You killed him!" she sobbed. "I never even knew it was his birthday—he always was modest!"

Harry, Ron, Malfoy, and Krum weren't listening. "Vell, zat vas eazy," Krum said.

"Now what?" Harry asked. They stared at each other, then began to fight again, setting each other's hair on fire with the torches.

"Fine!" Hermione cried. "I'll go to Neville!"

"Neville!" Ron exclaimed incredulously, his falming red hair flaming (literally). "Neville?"

"Not Neville?"

"Who is zis 'Neville' of vhich you speak?"

Ignoring the boys' cries of horror, she turned to leave, then turned back.

"Did any of you realize that with Dumbey gone, You-Know-Who himself could—"

She was interrupted when Lord Voldemort walked in. Seeing Dumbledore, he took a to-do list out of his pocket and checked one off. Then he looked up and saw Hermione. He whistled.

"Hiya, friend of Harry. What's your name? I'm Tom!" He gave his most stunning smile.

Harry gasped in disbelief.

Hermione, however, smiled back. "I'm Hermione Granger," she told him, "but you can call me Hermy!"

Even Malfoy couldn't think of a thing to say.

The end

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