Chapter 6

A/N: Lemonade in this chapter.


Tatsuha felt as if all his nerves had been plucked like a guitar string. His gaze flew to Ryuichi's ear. Yes, the piercings were there. But I was too distracted by that damn cap to notice them. Was that why he wore it?

"Ry--Ryuichi?" Oh, my God, it's GOD. RYUICHI!

"I shouldn't have deceived you this long."

I kissed him! I can't believe it. I kissed him and I didn't even know it was him!

"I recognized you in that store--"

Oh no, I licked his picture in a lascivious manner right in front of him! I told him I wanted to MARRY him. Tatsuha rested his forehead against the brick wall next to the dryer, and considered beating his brains out.

"--because I saw you earlier today, sleeping on Tohma's couch."

I told him he wouldn't be able to walk for a week after sex with me. Tatsuha's face fell into his hands. Kami-sama, how could you do this to me?

"Tatsuha? Tatsuha?"

The teenager was hugging himself, staring down at the floor. "I uh, really embarrassed myself back at that shop, didn't I?"

Ryuichi paused, as if trying to think of how to put this. Then he smiled broadly. "Yeah, you did."

"Gawd!" Tatsuha's entire body flinched. In pitiful tones, the teenager asked, "Why didn't you stop me?"

"I was curious to see what you'd say next. It was pretty funny."

"Funny!" Tatsuha was near tears. Every stupid adolescent remark he'd made came rolling through his mind.

Ryuichi was watching him closely. In a more serious tone, he said, "Tatsuha, I need to talk to you."

The teenager knew what those words meant. Refusing to look at the other man, he said, "You said you weren't interested in men. Was that true only of Yoshi? Or Ryuichi as well?"

"For both," the singer replied softly. "I'm sorry. If I were, I would pick you. You're very attractive."

Tatsuha wanted to run out of the room. Ryuichi took his arm. "I'd like some privacy for our talk," said the singer, "in case someone walks in on us. You're staying in the guest bedroom? That will do."

The teenager's mortification was warring with his urge to stay with his idol, but he let himself be led along the hallway towards his bedroom.

"Just how much of Yoshi is you?" Tatsuha asked roughly. "He wasn't at all like your public self."

Ryuichi sighed. "He's very like me. And you're right, he's a side I don't show to the public. What did you think of him?"

"He was nice." Tatsuha was careful to be studying something else every time the singer glanced his way. "How come when you're being interviewed by the press, you act like such a--" He fumbled for the right word.

"Idiot?"

"No! I mean, a chibi."

"I prefer idiot," Ryuichi replied. "It's more truthful."

"But is it just an act, or is that really you?"

"It's both. I was that way as a child. I've never known what to say to the press, or our fans. Even after all these years, I still don't. So I act for them."

"But what about Tohma? And Noriko? I've heard that you behave like a chibi in front of them, too."

Ryuichi sighed again. "You have to understand how hard it was for us when we first started. Practically no one came to our gigs, we were heckled, club owners screwed us out of our pay, our equipment got stolen. Tohma wanted to quit. He wasn't used to giving his best efforts only to have everyone jeer at him. Noriko wanted to give up, too. And so did I, often. But I couldn't let them see that. I was the leader of the band. If I let them know I was discouraged or fed up, they definitely would have quit. It was my enthusiasm that kept us going. So I created this artificial person who acted for them, for the press, for the fans we picked up, for everyone, eventually. My chibi self soon became famous in his own right. He's amusing, so I won't destroy him. He's a Japanese icon, after all."

For the first time in minutes Tatsuha was looking Ryuichi in the eye. This was a sobering thing to hear.

"But what about the man on stage? You--change, then."

Ryuichi grinned. It was not a childish grin, but a sexy one, almost threatening. "Oh, he's real."

Tatsuha swallowed hard. "I think your clothes might be done. Let me get them." He was too nervous to stay a second longer. Ryuichi could be just as scary in real life as on stage.

When he returned with the clothes, he passed them to Ryuichi, and left the bedroom while the singer dressed. For a few seconds he leaned against the wall outside, his thoughts whirling. Then they abruptly settled on one fact. Ryuichi Sakuma was changing his clothes. Ryuichi Sakuma was STARK NAKED inside his bedroom AT THIS VERY MOMENT.

Tatsuha fell to his hands and knees, trying to see through the keyhole. Dammit, he thought, nothing.

The door opened, catching Tatsuha by surprise. Ryuichi paused at the sight of the teenager and a faint smile crossed his face.

Blushing, Tatsuha entered the bedroom as the singer stepped back, still smiling in that enigmatic way. Without his disfiguring hat or bulky coat Ryuichi was beautiful. The teenager began to feel faint from lovesickness.

"It's strange," said Tatsuha when he was able to jump-start his vocal cords. "That I haven't met you before. You've known my sister for years and met my brother Eiri at least a few times."

Sakuma perched on Tatsuha's desk while the teenager sat on the bed opposite. "I avoid them if possible. I can't stand either of your siblings. Sorry."

Tatsuha's reply faltered in his mouth.

"Do you want to know why?" Sakuma continued. "They're both selfish and prone to temper tantrums. They throw their opinions around like thunderbolts and with about as much damage. I've met my share of horrible people in life. I have no desire to meet any more." He gave Tatsuha a look difficult for the teenager to interpret. "I'd always had the impression you must be like them. Until today."

Tatsuha was stunned. Mika and Eiri, just by being Mika and Eiri, had RUINED all his previous chances to meet Ryuichi? For the first time in his life he felt ashamed of his glamorous siblings. He'd never paid much attention to any criticism of them before, but this hurt.

"Why," whispered Tatsuha, staring at the ground, "did you spend the afternoon with me, then?"

"You passed my test."

Test?

"You liked Ryuichi Sakuma as he essentially is, without knowing it. There are virtues to dressing like a fool, Tatsuha. It allows you to learn a great deal about the character of others. Most people would have held their noses and avoided me in that record store." He glanced sidelong at Tatsuha out of the corner of his sunglasses. "And I seem to have passed your test."

Again that odd smile.

A faint hope appeared in Tatsuha's heart. But-- "You said you don't like men?" the teenager repeated plaintively.

Ryuichi shook his head no. "I'd like to be your friend, Tatsuha, but I don't want sex getting in the way."

Tatsuha could not reply.

"Burn that CD for me, will you?" Sakuma continued. "I do want a copy. And I want to see you again, but I'd better go, now."

Tatsuha turned his face away. He couldn't bear to see Ryuichi leave. The singer paused by the door, watching him.

A very long moment passed.

Click.

Tatsuha lifted his head slightly to see what that noise had been. Ryuichi's thumb was resting on the lock of the doorknob. It had been pushed in, and was now locked.

What?

The singer stepped away from the door. He crossed his arms and started pulling his T-shirt off over his head.

"What are you doing!" the teenager blurted. It was very hard to swallow all of a sudden, partially because of the tightness in his throat, partially because of the sudden lust he felt at the sight of that smooth, beautiful chest. The real thing, not a picture on a CD cover. "I thought you said you weren't interested in men."

Ryuichi dropped his T-shirt over a chair back, then smiled gently. "I'm not. But it won't kill me to do it with you once, either. You said that back at the fountain and you were right."

Tatsuha forced himself to swallow. Miserably, he replied, "You're only doing it because you feel sorry for me."

The singer stepped closer until he was standing in front of the boy. "I do feel attracted to you, Tatsuha, all gender aside."

"Ryuichi, I--"

The singer lifted the boy's chin upwards, and lowered his own face until it was close to Tatsuha's. With a very serious expression, Ryuichi asked, "Are you going to say no?"

The singer's steady gaze was almost terrifying. But Tatsuha gasped, "Hell, no! I want this."

Ryuichi nodded.

"But would you let me--," Tatsuha began timidly.

"--be seme?" the singer finished. Ryuichi closed his eyes briefly, as if he didn't care for this at all. Then he opened them again. "All right. This is for you, anyway." He sat on the bed and lay back, his hands behind his head as if he were modeling for a photograph. But without any smile.

Tatsuha halted. In that instant, he found himself thinking of Sanjiro and the memory froze him. He was asking Ryuichi to do for him exactly what Sanjiro had wanted from himself.

"No," said the teenager firmly. "We're not starting like that." He raised Ryuichi upwards, and kissed his cheek. "You're forgetting one thing. Seme means that I'm going to make you like it."

"Then I ought to let you start," Ryuichi replied doubtfully.


Later, mental pictures of that hour would come back to Ryuichi. For they only had an hour, until Mika came home.

Glimpses. The front of his jeans open, the white briefs being pushed down. The first touch between his legs. A finger lightly tickles the hairs at the base. A hesitant moment before the singer realizes this feels pleasant, having Tatsuha's fingers sliding down him. Then Tatsuha's warm mouth and lips there, licking, sucking. This was not very different from a girl doing the same thing. Not so bad, thought the singer, eyes half-shut.

I won't go all the way, Tatsuha assured him. You're not ready for that. But I can teach you this. A moist finger sliding inside him. Do you feel that? Let me know when I find the spot.

Tatsuha, I don't think I can climax like this. That finger feels so strange.

I know, you have to get used to it. Talking around the shaft, pausing to tongue the slit, other hand stroking the sac, then the mouth hard again, sliding down, teeth just brushing the fragile skin, the finger rubbing firmly inside.

A wild cry. A violent thrusting. Wetness.

I was wrong. Said like a drunken man. Oh, Gods.

Then Tatsuha's voice. Maybe I could, now. I've got two fingers in here, it's not too tight. Care to try?

Inhibitions loosened. All right. But please slick that rubber up first. An eye opens. Gods, he's got it on his face. Let me wipe it off, Tatsuha. A tongue licks. Maybe it tastes better if it's not your own.

A laugh. I think it's wonderful.

How can you tell? A tongue tastes his own tongue, a long kiss. Those two fingers still haven't left, another has joined them. Still working inside the opening. Let me help you put that on, your hands are sort of busy.

Another laugh. OH MY GOD!

What? Did I hurt you? I'm sorry!

No! You just touched me, that's all.

Wicked smile. So that's all I have to do, touch here like this, (sliding a finger along the covered length) and you instantly react? My, I never thought I was that good.

If you don't let go, this is going to end too fast.

I have to help you with the lube, don't I? Do you always travel around with this?

Uh--.

Don't answer. I'm not sure I want to know.

Aaaaagh.

What? Did I--.

No, it just feels TOO good.

Pause. Laying backwards. Tensing. Eyes shut. Yet hard again.

I don't think it'll be difficult for you, I've got three in here. A sliding out, and a pushing in.

Sharp suck of breath, a long still moment. Okay, do it.

Not yet. A smile. Why, Sakuma-san, this part of you still needs attention. And so soon after the first time? More evil fingers.

Not even noticing any pain now. But not sure about another peak, with that long thick shaft inside, but still, those fingers.

After a time, Wrong Again.

Hard thrusting, finally. The boy gasps, falls forward, is encircled. This is strange. The boy is shuddering in my arms as if he's a child. No one here is really dominant, no one really submissive, I see. He looks like he's about to cry. I lift his face for a kiss, and his mouth is very gentle on mine.

And then a goddamned car horn from outside.

"Tatsuha! I'm home! Help carry in these shopping bags!"

Panic.


Continued in chapter 7.