Deep down inside, I wanted you
More than anything in the world,
Even if it is one sided love.

Today, the air was lighter than the past weeks, when I was completely oblivious to Yuki. Instead of taking the train to work today I walked. From now on, I hope I only breathe deeply of this light air, and not suffocated by the dense atmosphere of the past.

"Shuichi!" Hiro yelled out running behind. I turned around, and honestly smiled, and said, "Hey Hiro. Good morning, how are you?" "Mm...a little tired but everything is ok." He replied and yawned. "How are you Shuichi?"

"Oh me, I'm better. Yuki said good morning to me today, I take that as a good sign." I replied. "Really? No Kidding? He said something to you? Wow Shuichi, that's very nice to hear. So I guess you're ready to work hard today right?" He half jokingly asked. "Yeah, yeah I'm in the mood to work today. Let's go before our manager gets all worked about us being late." As I said that we both went into the record company and started to work. After work Hiro asked me if I wanted to go karaoke with him and the rest, but I decided to go home early and cook something for Yuki. "Bye guys!" I said waving to them. I started to walk to the nearest grocery store on the adjacent side of where Yuki place was located. "Hmm... what would Yuki want to eat today?" I thought. Sushi? No... that's not very special. I walked down the isles to get some ideas to what to cook for him. Spaghetti! I'll cook him spaghetti, I never tried but there's a first time for everything.

"That'll be 15.47 Yens" The store cleric said.
"Here you go." I said and grab the bag and walked out the automatic sliding door. I slowly started to walk to Yuki place hoping that he wasn't home so when he did get home, I can surprise him with the dinner I made. I hope he eats it.
I got to the apartment and was standing outside and rang the doorbell. A part of me hoped he wasn't home, yet another wanted him to open the door, so I can stare into those deep yellow eyes.
No one answered the door, I was a little disappointed but open the door and went into the empty kitchen and started to cook. I took everything out of the bag and threw the bag away. I grabbed a medium size pot from the cabinet below and turn on the fire. I took the pot and from the sink I poured water into it and let it sit on the open fire stove. I prepared the spaghetti and the tomato sauce. I thought to myself so good so far. I turned on the radio so I wouldn't feel so alone. :click:

This is Tsusaski Haro, and tonight we will be playing your requests.
So let's get to it, ' Hello your on J-Pop Station what's your request for tonight?'
"Hi, I like to hear Glaring Dream by Bad Luck"
Oh, I personal enjoy that song as well. Bad Luck been quite popular these days, I wonder if it has anything to do with the lead singer of the band and his relationship with the infamous author Yuki. Well anyways here's your request.

[Glaring Dream Playing in the Background]

I gave out a big sigh as I started to stir the spaghetti in the hot boiling water. Why does it matter that Yuki and I are together? I just don't understand it, I just feel so guilty.

"YEEEEOOUCH" I loudly yelped. I was so distracted by what I was thinking I forgot I was cooking and some hot water spatter on my hands. I dropped the chopsticks.
I started to rub where the water spattered me, it was red and swollen, and it hurts a lot. I crawled over to pick up the chopsticks I dropped. Then I saw two sets of nice polished black shoes walk up to the chopsticks. I picked the chopsticks up and slowly got up and found myself staring in those yellow eyes.
The pain in my hand didn't hurt anymore, I completely forgot about it. Those cold yellow eyes are so beautiful to stare into.
"What happened...are you ok?" He softly asked.
I quickly snapped out of it and said, "Oh, it was nothing really I was just cooking...and some hot water spattered—" before I could finished, Yuki grabbed my hands and looked at wound and started to lick it.
"Ohh..." I was so shocked at what Yuki was doing.
"Better now?" he stopped and said.
"Yes...yes...very much....thank you." I stuttered. He was still holding my hand. His hand was so soft and warm, his cold yellow eyes softened and he let my hand go. And started to stir the spaghetti that I forgot I prepared.
"I'll do it; you go treat your hand." He said and kept at stirring the pasta.
I went into the bathroom and started to treat my hand. When I was done, I got out of the bathroom; I looked over to the empty kitchen. I walked into the dining room; it was dimly light by 3 candles on the table and other smaller candle on the surrounding tables. In front of two seats opposite of each other was a beautiful plate of spaghetti with tomato sauce on top. The delicious aroma made me come nearer. Then Yuki came in with a bottle of red wine and placed it on the table.
"How romantic, Yuki." I said softly. I didn't get a reply, he just sat down on one of the seats and I slowly sat in the other one.
"I hope.......I hope it suits your taste." He said and started to eat.
I stared at him for a bit and started to eat. It was more delicious than it looked. Maybe perhaps it was made out of love? No, I'm so foolish jumping to conclusions.
We didn't speak when we were eating. When we were done eating, we just sat their staring at our empty plates.
"I'll clean up, you go shower and get ready for bed." Yuki said and grabbed the plates.
"No Yuki, it's only fair if I do the dishes you cooked." I said grabbing his arm. He stopped and looked at me for a moment and walked into the kitchen. I heard the water turn on, and I went into the bathroom and stepped into the shower and turn the water on. "Why is Yuki being so nice to me today?" I thought. I should be grateful and not think of these things, but I can't help but wonder why.
I got of the shower and wiped myself with the towel. I got of the shower with my boxers on and Yuki stared at me.
"Shuichi...Would you...could you sleep me tonight?" He quietly asked and looked down.
"....Yuki." I whispered. I was so shocked that he asked me that. Was it true, did Yuki really ask me that? "...I'd love to." I finally replied.
Yuki gave a small smile and stepped into his room. It was so long ago that I saw his smile. I felt like I was about to explode, I'm so happy, thanks to Yuki.

I walked into Yuki room, and notice that he's already in bed with his right arm over his eyes. I suddenly realize I was only in my boxers. I blushed and quickly thought I should go to my room and put on more clothes.
"Shuichi, why are you taking so long?" Yuki said without moving his arm from his eyes.
So I decided that it's ok for today and slip in bed.
"Good night Yuki." I whispered in his ears.
"Mm..." He muttered. He suddenly turned and faced me. His eyes were still closed and I looked at him. I took a deep breath; I couldn't smell the cigarette odor on his clothes. He smelled so good. Here I am lying in bed with the man I love, yes love. And it feels very good.

"Last request for tonight, Sore ga ai deshou
...because I have you, because I have tomorrow
Because I can't live on all alone
I feel you so close by me, I guess that's love
Because you know how much pain tears can bring
I want to find a smile in your transparent eyes
As I search for a definite meaning in them..."