CHAPTER III
Flickering Sympathies
"Rinoa, you must calm down."
"Edea, Ultimicia is once again, taking over my body, how the hell am I suppose to calm down?"
In he sooth, motherly voice that Rinoa had grown so fond of over the past few years, Edea put a gentle hand on her shoulder and said.
"Rinoa, I know what your going through right now. If any person in this world knows, it's me. All we got to do is get through this."
With a heavy sigh Rinoa nodded at the older women who guided her across the room to one of the orphanages bedrooms. Rinoa gratefully collapsed into the mattress, putting the pillow over her face, blocking all sunlight from her pale features.
"I'm going to call Laguna, sweetheart. Together the three of us can come up with a course of action."
Not waiting for a reply, Edea started to head towards her phone. The matron was about to leave the room when in a hollow voice Rinoa said to her.
"I saw Squall last night?"
Stopping where she stood, Edea turned to her. "How are you?"
Not answering the question Rinoa continued to speak, her voice loosing more emotion with each word. "I saw him with another woman, her name's Macy. I saw Quistis too, I'm positive that she also saw me."
"I don't know what to tell you Rinoa," Edea said moving towards her on the bed. "It was difficult for everyone after you left; I'm not going to pain you with talking about what Squall was like. I guess though, time enviably continues and people move on."
"I know," Rinoa said, burying her sobs in the pillow. "It's just seeing it is a harsh reality."
Feeling a warm hand on her shoulder Rinoa dared to look up, Edea was staring down on her lovingly.
"Life hasn't been fair to you Rinoa, you have experienced more grief and despair then I would wish upon any living soul. Even still Rinoa you have showed amazing resilience, your heart is still gold. After everything Rinoa, you still have so much to offer. You give everyone around you hope."
No longer bothering to hide her sobs Rinoa asked the former sorceress "Hope of what?"
Bending down, Edea affectionately kissed her on the top of the head and whispered softly in her ear.
"Hope that despite everything, life will go on."
Beyond words Rinoa threw her arms around the one time Matron letting the warmth and security of Edea's arms comfort her.
"You will go on Rinoa," Edea told her, her head was now laying on top of her own.
The two held each other until Rinoa's sniffles faded and her sobs vanished. Slowly Edea began to pull herself away "I'm going to go call Laguna and Cid, I don't want you to worry about anything."
Drying her soaked cheeks Rinoa nodded.
Getting up from the bed, Edea once again started making her way out of the room when Rinoa called after her.
"Edea, for everything you've done…I just want to thank you."
"No Rinoa, it's I who should be thanking you."
With both women smiling affectionately at each other, Rinoa watched Edea leave the room and listened to the faint sounds of Edea picking up the phone.
With Squall by her side, he and Quistis entered Balamb. Not speaking since Quistis' confrontation with him about Rinoa, the two walked silently to Zell's bar.
The stone paved path between the main shopping strip and the docks have literally been the stepping stones in Balamb for all the years in Quistis's sketchy memory.
Each stone was a different color, creating a diverse walk way through the ocean view town. Whenever Quistis was in a hurry, she never paid attention to the path that she scurried along, but when she had the time, Quistis loved to stare at each stone that she stepped on. It was odd, bizarre thing of hers, though not known to anyone else; Quistis always had a hidden meaning behind her affection for the simple rocks.
In her ever fading list of collective memories, one that never left her, one memory that went back as far as she could remember was one on the same path that she walked on now.
It was the day that she came to Balamb Garden, she was only four years old and it was the first time that her eyes had fallen upon the quaint city.
Everything back then was so large, it all had made Quistis feel so alone in a huge world where she couldn't find one place to call home.
She hadn't gotten along well with her last family; her adopted mother was an extremely ill woman who no longer had the strength to raise a child. Her adopted father was a war veteran, whose bitter resentment went farther then the meaningless war that he had returned from.
No longer could Quistis remember the family's names, but the feeling of how unwanted she had felt always lingered. For years it tormented Quistis, made her feel inadequate. It wasn't until she was older that Quistis figured out why she was adopted by the family in the first place.
They were two individuals that had dealt with ordeals that had destroyed them, if only mentally. They were both looking for something that filled the voids that had unexpectedly entered their lives. They assumed that Quistis, a child, could fill those wholes. In the end, however, Quistis only brought realization of their faults to the couple, and so she went.
Stepping onto the stone path for the first time Quistis could still feel the pain and failure that filled her young heart. She started to run through the quiet town, running as fast as her short legs would take her.
In front of the Balamb Inn Quistis tripped scrapping her knee on the stone path.
All alone on the lonely path Quistis began to cry. An act that would be predictable for a child, but that be considering any child spare Quistis. Even as a child she was too proud for her own good.
As her cheeks became soaked a familiar shadow hovered over her.
"Quistis, its okay," came a kind voice. "Everything will be okay."
It was Edea Kramer, only then Quistis knew her strictly as Matron.
Matron informed Quistis that her adopted parents contacted her when she ran away, and someone had seen her sneak onto a shipment boat heading to Balamb.
Hearing this had only made Quistis cry even harder. She wailed that she didn't want to go back, and that she wanted to stay with Matron.
With a warm smile that even to this day stood out vividly in Quistis' mind, Matron said that she could stay with her.
That was the first night that Quistis had stayed at Balamb Garden, where she became the first student to be conducted into the institution.
On the stone path, still walking in silence with Squall, Quistis' thoughts probably would have stayed with the memories had reality not suddenly hit her.
Colliding with another body Quistis looked up to see who she had ran into.
"Laguna?" She said surprised.
"What the hell are you doing here?" Squall asked his father coldly.
Standing in front of them, Laguna looked like a deer caught in headlights. With his eyes wide and his mouth hung open the Esthar President struggled to speak.
"I…I'm here on business." He finally spit out.
"What business do you have hear in Balamb?" Squall was quick to question.
"I'm here to talk to Cid Kramer," Laguna answered, gaining his composure.
"Why do you need to talk to him?"
"That Squall, is between me and Mr. Kramer," Laguna said in an uncharacteristic curt voice. "If you want to talk to me I'll be staying at the Balamb Inn." With that Laguna nodded politely at the both of them and then walked away.
Adults were arguing. Comments and remarks were fired across the room, and all the while Rinoa stayed silent. She felt like a young child again, adults arguing about her own future while she sat idly by.
"She's being taken over my Ultimicia Edea, there's not much else of a choice."
"Cid, you're talking about her as if she was a monster. Rinoa is a human being and an incredible one at that." Edea argued back to her husband.
With a deep sigh Cid spoke. "No one here will deny what kind of character Rinoa has, but a monster is here, though it might not take its usual form."
"Cid, I can't believe you…"
"Mrs. Kramer," Laguna addressed the aging Matron, speaking up for the first time. "I understand both concerns. When I put Adel in her sealed cell, there was not a day that guilt didn't invade my soul. Adel's evil was never a doubt in my mind, but the thought that who the hell was I to imprison another living being to an eternity of doom plagued my already troubled soul to this very day." Laguna shook his head, as if he was shaking his sins away. "The point, I regrettably feel, is that with Rinoa alive…thousands of lives around the world are in danger."
"But what about Rinoa's life, she was not given this burden willingly. I bestowed it upon her, and that Mr. Loire is to my everlasting shame."
"Edea,"- Cid began again, but at this point Rinoa had had enough.
"Please, Edea, Cid, Laguna," catching their attention Rinoa paused for only a moment. Gathering every last drop of composure that she possessed Rinoa closed her eyes and spoke the words that had been dwelling in her heart.
"I know each of you only argue for what you think is best, but if I could tell you what I want, maybe all your arguments could be put to rest."
Their eyes all fell onto her, each telling her their own sorrow, regrets…their own stories, but what they did not realize was this was her story. A story that she did not plan to have the whole world to burden.
"Please Laguna; seal me for eternity as you had Adel."
"No Rinoa," Edea gasped. "This is not what should be destined for you."
"But it is Edea," Rinoa cried. "And no twist of fate can reverse that."
Edea turned her head away, but Rinoa felt a need stronger then fate to understand. Grabbing a hold of the Matron's hand she whispered to her. "Edea I'm not afraid, I'm not afraid about what I have to do."
"Then I'll be afraid for you child," Edea whispered back, taking the hand that held her own and kissing it gently on the edge of the palm.
"Rinoa..." Cid began, but his words failed him.
"I know Mr. Kramer, just as I know that this is what I must do."
The Kramer's were silent, leaving only one person left for Rinoa to speak to.
"Rinoa, of all the courageous acts I have scene. Here right now, here with you. I truly believe I have never met anyone braver."
"Thank you Laguna, but don't praise me for this."
Rinoa watched Laguna's eyes flicker with understanding before he told her "You'll be praised with nothing less then with what you deserve Rinoa."
A half-smile curled onto her lips. "Well I guess that's all a girl can hope for then, isn't it?"
Sympathetic looks suddenly over took their faces. "Guys," she begged. "Please don't do that."
Knowing what she meant the three of them all nodded, and for her own sake they took on a professional manner. They discussed solutions and details, in a way as if they were all looking at the problem from a third person point of view. It was the only way that they could handle the manner; they simply had to take all emotion out of it.
By the end of everything a solution was decided. Rinoa had one week before her entire existence would be sealed and Rinoa Heartilly would just be another name that fades into the tales of history.
AUTHORS NOTES:
I really enjoyed writing this chapter. Not only the emotion that is boiling inside Rinoa, but the sequence where I got to delve a little into Quistis' pass. I hope for readers it's all steering you in an interesting direction.
I hope to finish the next chapter soon, but I'm just beginning college and who knows where my own directions will be steering.
Hope all out there had a pleasant summer.
Take it easy,
Leah
