CHAPTER VII

Day Four

"I think you did the right thing," Selphie assured her. "I don't care what Zell says, Squall has the right to know."

"I think that too, but after I told him I started thinking. Doesn't Rinoa have the right to her own business? I feel like I meddled in something that I don't know all the information to."

Quistis watched Selphie's expression saddened, something that it rarely does. After a deep sigh Selphie spoke. "I'd love to look back at Rinoa fondly; she was a major part of all our lives. With that said, the fact remains that Rinoa left Squall, whose place is much closer to my heart."

In a rare moment of total seriousness, Quistis took in her friend's words. Although she would always have a sympathetic tie with Rinoa Heartilly, Squall's well being was always one of her main concerns. The confirmation of that thought cemented her decision.

After a quick goodbye Quistis parted from Selphie to make her afternoon appointment with Cid.

Meetings with Cid were always awkward for Quistis; they were awkward for everyone whose roots connected with the orphanage. Cid was the father figure that none of them really had. When meeting with him in a professional setting, Quistis didn't know rather to address him as the headmaster of Balamb Garden, or the goofy old man that he really was. For the most part the group referred to Cid as the latter man, spare Squall, who was professional to everything connected with Garden.

Entering Cid's office a smile greeted her, though Quistis was quick to notice it wasn't as wide as it usually was. She took the seat opposite of Headmaster.

"Hi Quistis," Cid said, his voice uncharacteristically indifferent. "I called you in so I could hand you your next mission."

"Alright," she answered, taking the manila folder that Cid handed her. "What am I up to this time?"

"I'm sending you with two others to Esthar; apparently some scientific research was stolen. I want you to investigate"- Cid's voice broke odd when Squall suddenly entered the room. The two men glared at each other, where Cid's eyes portrayed concern, Squall's were more along the line's of raiser sharp daggers.

"Here are the reports from the Mandowski mission," Squall said curtly, throwing a stack of papers onto Cid's desk, without so much as another word or glance Squall turned around and briskly left the room.

Quistis' eyes followed Squall until the door shut firmly behind him.

After Cid's briefing Quistis left the headmaster's office and immediately went to the familiar office that was next store. She was about to knock on the door when the sound of shuffling steps from behind stopped her.

Turning around Quistis was able to only perform one action, and that action was to gawk at the person that she now found before her.

For the third time that week, Rinoa Heartilly stood before Quistis, and what a sad sight she was. Her entire body was soaked and shaking, she had obviously walked through the rain. With her frail, pale arms holding it's own thin frame Rinoa stared hopelessly up at her.

For the past three years Quistis had held only bitter thoughts for Rinoa. She had witnesses what she's done to Squall, and no pass memories were able to reprimand the despised image that Quistis had held for the women that she once saved the world with. Now, however, seeing Rinoa at her weakest moment, all that had been erased. Quistis, in the face of all past feelings, felt nothing but deep sympathy and even a tinge of love for the raven haired girl that now stood before her.

With her heart curling around the edges, the smallest of smiles reached Quistis's lips. In a gentle voice Quistis said to her friend.

"Hi Rinoa."


Bitterness. His heart pounded with it, his mouth tasted it at every moment, all his thoughts gravitated towards it. Its poison was taking him over, but Squall simply didn't care.

For so long Rinoa had haunted him, for so long all he wanted was closure. Seeing her again…it was like having salt thrown in all his past wounds.

Entering his office Squall collapsed into his chair, why couldn't all the shadows of his past just leave him the hell alone?

Burying his face in his gloved hands Squall heard the faintest knock on his office door.

"Go away," he barked at whoever dared to intrude on his sorrow. When no voice or second knock followed Squall thought he had won a small victory. Seconds later, however, his door opened and a shadow of a figure entered his office.

Ready to yell Squall stepped up from his desk "What the hell do…" His words stopped and his mouth grew dry.

"Hey Squall," said Rinoa quietly.

Squall couldn't believe it, there she stood, soaked to the bone, but there she was right there in front of her.

Suddenly her body broke into a fierce shake, leaving Squall not sure if it was merely because she was drenched or merely because he was standing before. Either way Squall set his bitterness aside, quickly moving to his coat hanger that stood by his door, Squall grabbed his brown leather jacket that for so many memories rested on his shoulders and placed it around Rinoa's.

With a look of disbelief Rinoa stared at the jacket, rubbing its feather collar between her fingers.

"It's been so long since I've seen this jacket," Rinoa said, her voice almost ghost like.

"It's been a long time since I've worn it," he replied, then indicated to the coat hanger which the jacket came from. "I've had it there since…" Squall stopped to catch himself, he was going to say 'since you left me,' but there was no need. From one look at her he could tell that Rinoa knew the rest of that sentence.

An uncomfortable silence took over. Desperately Squall wanted to keep in that moment of silence, in hope that if he was patient enough it would all go away. As much as he wanted this moment just to disappear, there was another force stronger then his pain and that was his curiosity.

In a moment that he couldn't describe, Squall spoke with rare emotion that he could neither explain nor take back. "What are you doing here Rinoa?"

"Squall, I…" that's all she could say. He watched as words failed her.

"Rinoa," he said desperately. "I'm tormented, I see you here shaking and half of me wants to console you while my other half wants to turn my back. Please, give me a reason not to do that latter."

"Squall…I'm sick."

"You're sick?" He repeated breathlessly. "What do you mean?"

"I don't have much longer…I'm tormented too because half of me wants to spare ourselves the pain of going through being torn from each other, while my other half desperately wants that brief time of happiness."

"Is that why you left three years ago?" He asked her, not quite able to grasp what she was telling him.

"That night I was told…I was told how sick I was. And suddenly right there and then I was going through all these new emotions; I didn't know how to deal with any of them. So I just ran."

"We could have worked through them together," Squall told her meekly.

"I didn't think I had that long."

"And here you are three years later," he added bitterly.

Squall watched as Rinoa's expression grew sadder. "I have no more explanations then that Squall, if you want more I'm sorry."

Exasperated Squall had to turn away from her, everything was all too cruel. Here she was, but if he was to except that, what would they have together? Months, weeks…days? Either way in the end he would have to deal with loosing her all over again.

Buried in his troubled thoughts, a gentle hand on his shoulder stirred him. He turned back to Rinoa, their eyes locked onto each other.

"I know what I'm offering is nothing, and if you told me to leave this office I won't hold it against you, in fact that's what I'm expecting you to say," pausing for a moment Squall watched her instinctively grasp the rings that laid upon her swan like neck. After a deep breath she continued. "I guess why I'm here is just to see you, at least for one last time and to tell you that through all this time, through everything that has happened…my heart has never left you Squall."

Watching her fighting against her own helpless tears, Squall fought against his own. The two stared yearningly at each other, she desperately needing to hear the acceptance in his voice, and he desperately needing to be just near her.

In a move braver then all his feats before Squall reached a hand over to hers. He held it frigidly at first, but soon he was grasping it as if he was to let go she would once again be lost.

"Rinoa," he spoke at last. "I don't know if I can handle loosing you again."

Her pale finger lovingly graced his cheek. "I just need to be with you Squall, I…" Her words once again faded, but this time he didn't need to hear anything else.

Wrapping his arms around her, both of them clung to each other in fear of ever letting go.

"I'm so scared Squall," she whimpered into his shoulder.

"I am too," he told her, meaning it with all his heart. "But know that I'm here when you need someone to cling to."

A quiet sob was all Rinoa replied, but that sob said more then any words could say. It said that maybe, just maybe, things could be alright.

They both clung onto that dire hope.

AUTHORS NOTE:

Well I finally had them come together. I hope all enjoyed.

I just wanted to thank a few people who've taken the time to read this far; lady-rinoa, FloralBlackMoon, almasy11, Squinoa Fan, Kye-Kye and Karaoke Risa. Thank you to all of you. And everyone else whose taken the time to read my story this far. I appreciate it.

Take it easy,

Leah