Disclaimer: I in no way own the characters or ideas from Without a Trace...but it would be so cool. Samantha and Martin would already be married and "Uncle Danny" would be shooting hoops with the kids!
A/N-Alright, I know it's been a while but I think it was worth the wait…hopefully you agree with me. I hope the ending doesn't sound too rushed! Enjoy!
Chapter Six: Do You Love Him?
Samantha lay awake as she rested on her right side, staring at the alarm clock by Martin's bed. It read 2:57 AM, an unbelievable time considering they had come to bed at 10:45. She was warm in her silk Valentine's pajamas. Martin had bought them for her as a gag gift before handing her the real gift, 24 karat diamond earrings. They were simple earrings that she would wear to work without drawing any attention to herself. He said she could wear them and think about him while he's out in the field getting shot at (a statement that had then made her laugh and now made her cringe).
There were small slits of light filtering in through the window. Although Martin had the blinds down, nothing could keep out the lights of the city. She tried to close her eyes and fall asleep but the light was too bright. She slowly rolled over so that she was now facing Martin rather than the window.
He was lying on his right side, his left arm draped carefully into place over the natural curve of his body. Every time he moved he would wake up because of the gunshot wound. After taking the prescribed painkiller (after many hours of Sam's nagging) he had fallen asleep.
She looked up into his face. His mouth was open and she couldn't help thinking that she would take his loud, heavy breathing over the utter silence that had filled her apartment any day. She had started home around ten that evening and made it halfway to her apartment before turning around and running back to Martin's. He had seemed surprised but pleased to see her in his doorway. She told him that she remembered how hard it was getting around after she'd been shot and wanted to make sure he was adjusting all right, which in essence was true. She left out the part about how lonely she had been and how much she had wished Jack had stayed with her. She didn't want Martin to feel the same way.
She put a hand gently on his bare chest, happy to have him next to her again. She smiled to herself and withdrew her hand and placed it instead under her head but continued looking up into his face.
As if sensing her eyes, the corners of his mouth twitched into a tired grin. His eyes slowly opened and it was then that she noticed his heavy breathing had stopped. She smiled guiltily at him while secretly loving the way his blue eyes peered over at her.
"Do you know how hard it is to sleep with you staring at me all the time," he said a smile in his tired and raspy voice.
"Sorry," she said quietly.
He smiled at her and rolled onto his back, the smile replaced with a grimace. She moved over closer to him and rested her head on his right shoulder and draped her arm over his middle. He smiled again and moved his arm down so that her body was cradled in his arm.
"I've missed you," she said closing her eyes and resting her head on his chest. She moved steadily up and down with him as his breathing slowed. He kissed the top of her head and although she couldn't see it, she knew he was smiling into her hair.
"Well, I can't remember, but I'm sure I missed you too," he said. She gave a small laugh and hit him playfully on the stomach. "I'm glad you're here though," he added quietly. It was at this point that she was very happy Martin couldn't see her face. She blushed deeply; knowing her cheeks would be a deep crimson.
"What is wrong with me?" she thought. "He's said that to me tons of times and it's never made me blush before." Suddenly, Dr. Kincaid's words flooded her mind. "No, that's definitely not it," she thought with vehemence.
"What are you thinking about?" Martin asked with a gentle squeeze after her few moments of silence. She obviously didn't want to tell him what she was really thinking so she quickly pulled something else out of her mind to tell him about.
She rolled onto her stomach and rested her chin on her fist so that they were making eye contact. He lifted his right hand up and brushed some strands of blonde hair out of her eyes. She smiled into his palm.
"You know how you wanted a welcome home party?" she said as a wide smile threatened to overtake her face as a look of horror spread across his.
"What did you do?" he asked pulling her body towards him.
"Well, I called Danny while you were taking a shower...and we're having a party for you on Monday," she said in a sing-song voice, her sentence broken up by fits of laughter.
"Sam," Martin said in a mock-whiny voice. She laughed and leant down to kiss him. "Why?" he said when she pulled back. She grinned at him, a mischievous glint in her eyes.
"You asked for it!" He gave a sarcastic laugh and then kissed her again. She felt content to sit there talking to him the rest of the night, but his giant yawns and heavy eyelids gave away his exhaustion. So, she kissed the tip of his nose and said goodnight. She fell into a pleasant sleep on his chest, a small smile present on her slender face.
They woke up the next morning still in each other's arms. Martin spent the better part of the morning on the phone with his parents. He numerously repeated that he was fine while his mother was on the other end. When it was his father, the conversation was restricted to facts about the case. He hung up the phone and looked over at Samantha (who was pretending she hadn't been looking at him from behind the Sports page).
"Good talk?" she asked even though she already knew the answer. She sipped her coffee as he came to sit next to her. He closed his eyes and rubbed his temple and slowly shook his head left and right.
"Come on," she said patting his knee and standing up. "Let's do something." She pulled hum up and towards the door.
"Where are we going?" he asked suspiciously, for Samantha was not usually a very spontaneous person, especially when it came to the two of them being in public.
"You feel like Chinese?" she asked as Martin pulled on his running shoes.
"Sure, I guess," he said, still very suspicious of this impulsive Samantha.
"Then we're going to P.F. Changs," she stated grabbing his keys and opening the door. She propped it open; piercing Martin with an anticipatory stare as he slowly tied his shoes. He eyed her warily as he stood up and reached for his jacket.
They walked hand-in-hand down the street. He had again been surprised when the morning doorman asked if he should call a cab for them and Samantha shook her head. It was a good five miles to the restaurant.
It felt good to be walking and talking to her with the warm sunlight beating down on them. A gently breeze played with Sam's hair and continually blew it into her face. That is until she got too frustrated and pulled it into a ponytail at the base of her neck.
They had done this once before, but in an extremely different circumstance. They were in his uncle's house the day after his Aunt Bonnie's funeral. He had tried so hard the previous day to keep from crying in front of Sam. It made him feel weak, but in the memorial service he broke down and couldn't hold them back anymore.
His dad was at the funeral and for the first time since he and Samantha had started dating, he was the one hiding their relationship. She told everyone that she was there because she'd been on the case with Martin as well as for moral support. Of course, Martin's cousins and uncle knew differently because the two of them had visited multiple times.
But when he started crying, Samantha cradled him and blew her cover, something Mr. Fitzgerald did not miss.
So, on top of the trauma of his aunt's death, Martin had to endure unending lecture after unending lecture about dating a co-worker and about how detrimental it could be to his career. Martin put up with it fairly well the whole night and didn't even flinch when his father continued badgering him during breakfast the next morning.
It wasn't until Mr. Fitzgerald began attacking Samantha that Martin fought back.
"Do you have any idea what kind of a girl she is? She slept with Jack Malone! When he was married! And had two kids!" he shouted. "That is not the type of girl I raised you to be with."
For the first time that weekend, Martin felt alive; granted, he was alive with murderous anger, but it led him to a reaction he hadn't expected.
"Take it back!" he shouted while simultaneously using all of his will power to keep from lunging at his father. "I don't care how much you dig into me about this, but leave Samantha out of it."
"She's a slut, Martin. Don't you see what she's doing? First, she slept with Jack, the supervisor, until you came along, the son of a powerful man in Washington..." Martin was red in the face and practically radiating anger. He was clenching his fists and grinding his teeth. "You can't honestly think she's good enough for you." At this point his father reached out and put a hand on Martin's shoulder.
Martin pushed his father back away from him with such a force that he fell backwards onto the sofa. He didn't trust himself to go any nearer to his father without hitting him so he backed away slowly, taking in deep breaths in a failing attempt to calm down.
"No, dad, I don't deserve her."
Then he tore from the room and ran into the adjacent kitchen, where Sam sat at the table, staring at her hands. Martin knew she had heard everything but was still too angry to console her. Instead he grabbed her hand and pulled her out of the back door, saying, "Let's go," as they walked out.
At first they had simply walked side by side, completely silent, neither one knowing where to start.
Martin received quite a few, "Hey Marty" and Sam got an equal number of smiles and nods. Finally, Martin broke the increasingly awkward silence.
"I'm sorry you heard that. I mean, I always knew my dad was an ass, but I never thought he would attack you like that." Samantha shook her head and bit her lower lip.
"It's not your fault. I mean, your father is entitled to his own opinion, it's not the first time I've been called something like that," she said looking over at him. He still looked furious, angrier than she had ever seen him and that was saying something.
"That doesn't mean he should say it, especially since it isn't true." She gave him a weak smile and took his hand.
"Well, he was right about one thing," she said looking down at their hands interwoven together. She could feel his angry eyes burning into her forehead. "I don't deserve someone as amazing as you." She said it all slowly and lifted her eyes to meet his softened ones. He shook his head and lifted her hand to his lips and kissed it softly before dropping their hands back down.
It was that evening, during their casual walk around his favorite neighborhood that Martin realized he was in love with Samantha. He wanted to tell her right then but knew that all progress that had been made would be lost. She would run faster than a speeding bullet away from him. She would close up like a clam and sooner than he could blink she would be throwing him to the curb.
They walked around that little neighborhood hand-in-hand until dusk when they set back out for his uncle's house. His dad glared at him but didn't say anything and his mother looked anxiously between the two.
Martin and his father had never really made up. They talked when it was necessary but usually messages were relayed through his mother. Any time they were forced to speak face to face his father would always ask "how she is." Samantha would always make defiant eye contact with him when he would visit the New York office but would steer clear of Martin's apartment. In fact, only once since the funeral had she met with him in an informal setting.
It was Christmas, and Samantha not having much of a family to go home to, spent her time off with Martin. She denied all of her defiant tendencies and managed to keep their relationship very low key. The only physical contact made was a hug after a few breathtaking gifts. She also went home at 10:30 both nights and came over the next morning. Martin said that his father didn't say anything about them, but she knew he was lying to protect her feelings. She could tell by the intensified tension between the two on the second day.
They sat down in a cozy booth near the kitchen. As usual, Samantha sat down on the side that gave her a clear view of the door and each guest entering. Martin bit his tongue, not wanting to start fighting the second day he was out of the hospital.
He ordered the same thing he always did, sweet and sour chicken with an extra eggroll. Samantha grinned at his predictability. She could usually pin him to a tee. She knew what he would order at every restaurant they frequented, what time he woke up on the weekends, what kind of coffee he would order from Starbucks on Mondays, and where he liked to sit on the couch when the Knicks were playing. Sam could predict his every move, especially when it came to his stomach or sports. In fact, the only things about him that eluded her were the things that had to do with the two of them.
They talked comfortably for a while about basketball and how one of these days they should try a picnic in the park again. Samantha suggested visiting his uncle and cousins some time soon, an idea that he was very open to. But soon conversation shifted to the case.
"Danny relieved me the second day and instead of going home to sleep, I went into work. I did the write up of the shooting, which I'm sure is going to get me into trouble, and then fell asleep…"
"Wait, why are you going to get into trouble?" Marin interrupted. It suddenly dawned on Sam that Martin was unconscious and didn't see her freak out.
"Oh, it's pretty embarrassing actually," she said, reddening a bit. "Um, well you got shot and I…well I started screaming and tried to run towards you…highly unprofessional…" Martin looked shocked but his eyes were full of worry.
"What'd the shooter do? Did he come at you?"
"Well, yes, but I didn't really notice." She blushed even more now. "Danny grabbed me and by that time Jack and Viv were moving in with S.W.A.T. which is probably a good thing, Jack would've known something was up if he'd seen me. I'm surprised he's not asking already considering how I flipped out."
"God forbid Jack knows something's going on between you and me. Good thing he didn't see!" Martin said sarcastically, leaning back in his seat.
"Martin, let's not start this now," Sam pleaded.
"Fine," he said looking for their waiter to get the check.
"Martin…" Sam said.
"No, it's fine, just forget it."
"Fine." Samantha threw her napkin onto the table angrily and became very interested in her fingernails as Martin paid. She didn't look at him again until he said, "Let's go." They took a cab back to Martin's apartments and sat as far away from each other as possible in the tiny back seat. She paid the cab driver and they headed inside, ignoring the "Afternoon Mr. Fitzgerald, Miss Samantha," and headed straight to the elevator. They briefly brushed hands as both attempted to punch the number six and Sam quickly drew her hand back and moved simultaneously toward the opposite side of the elevator. They stopped at the third floor and four other rather large people crammed into the already tiny space, each chatting animatedly and gesturing wildly with their hands.
Samantha and Martin pushed through when they stopped at the sixth floor. They walked silently to number 624. When he opened the door for her, she made a beeline for the bedroom, furious that in the midst of an argument he still acted like a gentleman. She picked up her clothes and pajamas from the previous day and walked back into the living room where Martin stood, a bottle of water in his hand.
"See you tomorrow," she said coldly, making it clear to him that she didn't want to be called or visited later that evening.
"Fine, see you at the party," he said, an equal amount of frostiness in his voice though if she'd been looking at him she would have seen his broken stance and frustrated eyes. She slammed the door behind her causing the table next to it to tremble and knock the bowl full of his change and keys onto the floor. Martin dropped his water bottle and ran to the door plotting to grab Sam and make her sit down and talk this out, but he stopped with his hand on the half turned door knob. He didn't know what made him stop; perhaps he was afraid of her real reason for not wanting to tell anyone or maybe because there were pennies all over the floor and the uncapped water bottle was spilling its contents all over his carpet. Eventually he let go of the doorknob and leaned backwards against the door, hoping against hope that this problem would resolve itself soon.
Little did he know that at the exact same moment Samantha was leaning against the door wondering whether or not she should go in and apologize for her outrageous behavior. The key in her right hand was an inch from the lock but she couldn't will it to go into it and turn.
She heard a door open to her left, one of Martin's neighbors was leaving her apartment. She turned her back on the door as his neighbor walked past.
"Samantha," she said with a slight nod.
"Mrs. Cooper," Samantha said with a reply nod. Mrs. Cooper smiled but eyed her clothing that was strewn across the hall when she had turned around so quickly.
"Everything all right, Samantha?" Mrs. Cooper asked as she stepped carefully over Sam's jeans.
"Yeah, I just brought the wrong set of keys," Sam lied. Mrs. Cooper smiled and walked on as Sam bent over to move her clothes to one side of the hall. She stood up and then leaned against the door in the same defeated way Martin was on the opposite side. Eventually she picked up her clothes, walked down the hall and proceeded into the elevator and out through the lobby.
She ordered a small pepperoni and green pepper pizza and spent the night on the couch watching an old movie marathon. The phone was always close by and she periodically checked for messages even when she knew Martin wouldn't call. She made it halfway through his number a few times before hanging up and pushing the phone away.
She awoke the next morning hardly refreshed or well rested. She awoke twice thinking her phone was ringing and once crying although she couldn't remember why.
She was the first of the team to work that morning and set up a punch bowl and a cake. Danny was next and he took the liberty of "decorating" Martin's desk. He put streamers all over the edge where Martin's name plate usually sat and put twenty balloons under his desk where his feet usually were. He threw strands of ten squares of toilet paper all over the top and covered the computer monitor with post-it notes people had written "Get Well Soon" on.
Vivian picked out the music and Jack put up a banner that said "Over the Hill" across it.
"He won't like that very much," Sam said as Jack stepped off of the ladder.
"It was all they had at the grocery store," Jack defended. Sam nodded a smile on her face. Despite her angry feelings towards Martin at that particular moment, she was thoroughly looking forward to seeing his face when he walked into the bullpen.
The four agents stood around, anxiously awaiting his arrival for the first fifteen minutes. When he still didn't show ten minutes later they headed to their desks, tired of standing around.
Vivian called Reggie to wake him up for school. Jack worked on a mountain of paperwork in his inbox although it looked as if he was distracted by something else. Danny and Samantha threw a football back and forth between their desks until a few agents from other departments showed up and Danny departed to engage in some friendly conversation, namely with a thin red head. Samantha chuckled as she watched Danny smile and joke with her. She toyed with the idea of dialing Martin's number but stubbornly refused to be the first to call.
After an hour, most of the cake was gone along with two or three agents who had to get back to work. Samantha finally resolved to call him, worry getting the better of her. The phone was to her ear and ringing when she saw him walking towards them.
"Welcome back," Danny and Vivian said in unison but Samantha's "Where have you been?" cut clear through it.
"Sorry I'm late; I must have turned off my alarm on Saturday and forgotten to turn it back on." His eyes met Sam's for the briefest of moments, but they told her that she had been the one that turned it off.
"Oops," she said quietly. Danny heard her and gave her one of his infamous grins which luckily went unnoticed when Jack walked in from his office. Martin was quickly surrounded by people, asking how he was doing and a few idiots asking what it was like to be unconscious.
Samantha didn't want to seem unnaturally attached to Martin so she hung back and talked with Vivian.
"You know, the funniest thing happened to me this morning," Viv said, a neutral look on her face.
"Oh really," Sam said, hardly interested but happy for any excuse to keep from talking to Martin.
"I called him to see where he was…" she paused and looked straight at Sam, "…and for some reason he thought it was you calling."
Samantha's eyes were huge and the paper cup full of punch was being smashed in her tightening grip.
"I…um…wonder why he would think that," Sam said trying to cover herself and failing miserably.
"So did I. At first I figured he must have mistaken my number for yours but then he started going on about some fight the two of you apparently had in his apartment." Viv looked pointedly at Sam, much like a mother would when she caught her kid doing something bad, except with amusement. There was an excitement in her eyes that had been absent when she found out about Sam and Jack.
She smiled at Sam and then walked towards Martin. She was glad when Danny walked over to her. She needed all of the excuses she could get to keep from staying at Martin's side the whole time, especially now that Vivian would be watching their every move. It wasn't the first time she'd had to avoid Martin in public.
One night after an extremely difficult case they all went out for dinner after the paperwork had been completed. Samantha had made sure not to sit next to him but across from him. Danny was diagonal from her, Jack on her left and Vivian on the end. She had used special care to talk to Martin and Danny rather than just Martin. She had to restrain from eating off of his plate, a habit she had become quite accustomed to when they went out. The one luxury she had allowed was a small amount of footsie under the table when she was sure no one else would notice.
Towards the end of the evening Danny asked her to dance. She was wary at first but one look at Martin told her it was okay. He looked amused and even teased that he would get a good laugh. The tune was a kind of jazzy salsa and Danny dipped and spun her until she couldn't walk straight. She was laughing wildly and bowed a few times to the applause and whistles she and Danny were getting from the other three.
"All right, I'm next," Martin said standing up as a slower song came on. As much as she wanted to, she couldn't bring herself to slow dance in front of the rest of the team with him.
"Sorry, I need to get home, maybe next time," she said smiling and hitting him on the arm.
Of course, Martin came over later, smiling at her, instantly causing her knees to turn into jelly. Before she said anything he turned the radio to a slow song and said,
"I believe you owe me a dance." She felt stupid at first, slow dancing across her living room. She knew it was cheesy but the longer they danced, the happier she felt. She loved just being in his arms. They weren't twisting or doing any fancy dance steps but she felt as if she could spend forever just swaying slowly back and forth.
She and Danny talked for a moment about how strange it was that five days had gone by and not a single case had come in. She gave a laugh when the conversation switched over to the red head he'd been talking to. She may have left but her number was on a slip of paper in Danny's pocket.
Martin looked over when he heard her laugh. They made eye contact but she quickly looked away. When she looked back up he was talking to Vivian and Danny (who had left her) and a feeling of guilt was rising in her throat. She knew how Martin was feeling, Jack had done to same to her when they began seeing each other.
She and Jack had only been seeing each other for three weeks when the FBI held their annual company picnic. Each unit was in charge of bringing an entrée. The missing person's unit was in charge of dessert. Samantha, being the horrible cook she was, brought jell-o instant vanilla pudding with nilla wafers.
At the gigantic table covered in foods from devilled eggs to chicken and rice casserole to tiramisu, Samantha searched for the section covered by where Vivian, Danny, Jack and Andrew (the agent that left before Martin was hired) had put their dishes. She soon found a spot in between Danny's chocolate covered strawberries (bought at the grocery store on the way there no doubt) and Jack's homemade chocolate truffles.
But, Jack was an even more terrible chef than Samantha. He couldn't even make grilled cheese. That could only mean one thing, Maria was here. She knew Jack wouldn't bring Hanna and Kate simply because of Andrew's terrible and unceasing profanity.
She chatted politely with a few agents she recognized from other units before finding Danny. He was rather engrossed with his flavor of the week girlfriend. She was a tall, thin brunette with tennis shorts on and a racer back shirt. She was beautiful and from what Samantha could tell, she had a good head on her shoulders.
Soon enough, Vivian, Mr. Johnson, and Reggie joined them followed by Andrew and his wife and Jack and Maria. His hand was on her back, guiding her towards the group. He let his arm drop when they came to a halt and he met Samantha's eyes for a brief moment.
They all ate dinner at the same table but Jack and Maria sat as far away from Samantha as possible. She tried to partake in the different conversations surrounding her but couldn't stay focused on anything. Her mind kept drifting to where Jack sat, his hand resting gently on her knee, looking as if it belonged there. He smiled at his wife in a way she thought he had only reserved for her.
During the company softball tournament Jack made a big deal out of Danny's strike-out, Vivian's double, and Andrew's ability to piss off the batter so much that the batter actually turned around and threatened to beat Andrew with it but only gave Samantha a high five when she scored a homerun.
By the end of the day she couldn't tell whether she was more furious of upset that Jack had completely ignored her. Of course, she understood why he had to. They were at a company picnic surrounded by co-workers and superiors not to mention his wife.
Samantha stood by the concessions table remembering how she had gone home that night and cried for the first time over Jack Malone. She couldn't help but think that Jack didn't call her the rest of that weekend and didn't bring it up the following Monday. She knew that the least Martin would have done was call and apologize. Chances are that he would have come over that very night with chocolates or her favorite movie.
Samantha had felt so horrible but at least she knew that Jack had a legitimate reason for ignoring her. And then it dawned on her that Martin felt the exact same way around her every time she had to pretend to care less about him or every time she lied about why she was late for work.
"But I don't have an excuse," Samantha thought. She looked over at Martin, eyes wide as he smiled and laughed. She knew what she had to do. She put her cup forcefully on the table and began to walk towards Martin. She was determined and nothing could stand in her way.
"Samantha, I need to talk to you," Jack said, stepping in front of her and completely cutting her off. She tried to get around him, but he persisted and grabbed her arm to hold her in place.
"Okay, well, I need to tell you something as well," she said to Jack. Then she looked over to where Martin stood, his eyes focused in on Jack's hand which was gently grasping her elbow. There was the smallest hint of jealousy in his eyes but Samantha chose to ignore it this one time. "Hey, Martin, come here," she yelled loud enough to snap him out of his trance.
He immediately began ending ongoing conversations and headed over to the other two.
"Sam, I really don't think that Martin needs to hear this," Jack said. He was anxious and continued to hold on to Samantha's arm, afraid that letting go would mean losing the opportunity to tell her what he'd been trying to say for the last week.
"Hang on just one second," Samantha said as she reached out her hand and let Martin grab a hold of it awkwardly. She was so excited about what she was about to say that she became completely oblivious to Jack's increasing frustration which only led to his outbursts.
"Samantha…" he said one last time over her quiet "I want you to hear something," to Martin.
"Jack, what is it?" she said now becoming annoyed at his insistence.
"I'm still in love with you!" he exclaimed.
Samantha's jaw dropped at the same time that Martin let go of her hand. He walked off shaking his head but Samantha could not make herself go after him. In fact, she couldn't even force her eyes to leave Jack's face. Her mind was racing. First, she thought she was hearing things and then she figured she must be going crazy, but as she studied Jack's face, she realized he was being serious.
Jack grabbed her hand and led her gently into his office so that they could talk privately. She sat down in an armchair across from his desk and he sat in the one next to her. She had managed to close her mouth by this point but was still clearly in shock. He reached across the arm of the chair somewhat uncertainly and grabbed her hands. A strange look flitted across her face as she looked down as his giant hands encompassed hers. His wedding ring was missing and she had a quick flashback to this same situation when he had broken up with her and that slim gold band had been present.
"I…I know that this is really sudden…"
"You can say that again," Samantha interrupted and Jack gave her a Look.
"…but you have to know that I've been thinking about this for a long time, especially since Martin's accident. I realized that it could have been you and if I lost you…well, I'd be pretty lost," Jack said. Samantha heard him until he said Martin's name. She started frantically looking around and pulled her hands away from Jack.
"Oh God, Martin heard you didn't he?" Jack stared blankly at her as a frustrated look came over her face.
"Sure I guess, why does it matter?" he asked.
"Never mind," she said. She looked around his office for a moment and then stood up and walked over to a picture of Jack's girls, right next to a picture of the team. She was silent for a long time but when she decided to speak, he listened. "How can you still be in love with me? I didn't even think you were really in love with me to begin with."
He stood up and walked next to her putting a hand on her shoulder. He felt her tense up but she didn't shrug it off and he took this as a good sign.
"Of course I loved you…I just couldn't let you know. I was married."
"Yes, I know that Jack," she said. She wasn't just going to accept this. For all she knew he had found out about her and Martin and was now trying to claim her as his property.
"Samantha," he said turning her around so that she was facing him. Her face was hard and emotionless. "What we had was real, you know that." He leaned in to kiss her but she turned away. He let go of her and she moved over towards the couch in the back of his office. He sat next to her and this time she took his hands.
"You're right…what we had was real. It was real two years ago, but it's long gone." Jack looked defeated. He had expected Samantha to come running back into his arms, happy that he had finally made up his mind about them. "I'm always going to care about you, but you were my past and…Martin is my future."
She watched as a look of shocked comprehension came over Jack's rough features. She was flattered that he was convinced that he loved her without being jealous, but she couldn't believe how much his epiphany hadn't affected her. She had imagined that moment so many times since their break up and figured that she would feel completely different than she did. All she could think about was how upset Martin probably was at that moment.
"Martin?" Jack asked still holding onto her hands. She smiled and nodded her head. She knew her cheeks were probably tinged pink but she was glad that Jack knew. It was almost a relieved feeling.
"Do you…do you love him?" he asked swallowing hard. She cocked her head to the side, seriously considering this question for she wanted to give him an honest answer.
"I'm not sure," she said. Her eyes were downcast but there was a glint in them that had not been present before. "You okay?" she asked giving his hands a light squeeze.
He nodded and then leaned over and kissed her briefly on the forehead. She smiled at him and stood up. He watched her walk out of his office without a backward glance and couldn't help but feel deserted and alone.
Samantha looked around the floor for Martin but couldn't seem to find him anywhere. No one had seen him and she sincerely hoped that he had not gone home, because he would stubbornly refuse to let her into the apartment.
She had finally concluded that that's what he had done and walked to his desk to dial his phone number when she spotted him outside on the balcony. She just looked at him for a moment, standing there in the chilly wind. She knew he was angry if he was blowing off every person who had come to his party.
She walked to the door and began walking towards him. He knew that it was her and didn't even look over as her footsteps came nearer.
"Hey, what're you doing out here?" she asked in an innocent voice once she was next to him. He didn't respond but she knew he heard her because of the way he clenched his jaw. She smiled but rolled her eyes. "Okay, so you heard what Jack said." At the mention of Jack's name Martin turned his head away from her. "That's how you want to do this? Act like a two year old and give me the silent treatment? Come on Martin, talk to…"
"Do you love him?" he said suddenly turning towards her and piercing her with his intense glare.
She tried to keep her face serious but started to giggle.
"Samantha, I find nothing funny about this," he said loudly, insulted by her laughter.
"I'm sorry, it's just that Jack asked the exact same thing whenever I told him about you." She said smiling at him.
"Just…answer the question." He was preparing himself for the worst. He'd been waiting for this since their first night together but he never imagined it would hurt quite this much.
She turned out towards the street and leant up against the hand rail. "I thought I did, for a really long time." He leant next to her and looked down at his hands. "I'm not going to lie to you…I thought I loved him even into the first few months we were together." She was looking at him now and he turned his head to make eye contact with her. "And as I think back, I think I may have actually loved him in some form or fashion…but the feelings I had for Jack don't even compare to how much…how much I love you."
His eyes widened but he didn't need to ask again for clarity, it was written all over her face. Her eyes were glistening and there was something within them that he had never seen before. She was searching his face for some sign of emotion.
"I love you, too" he said in a near whisper. She smiled widely and wrapped her arms around him. He hugged her tightly and then she let go and stared into his eyes. He cupped her face in his hands and pulled her in for a kiss. It wasn't the most passionate but it was one of the sweetest kisses she had ever received.
A/N-The end!
Well, not really considering I'm going to do little snapshots into Martin and Samantha's lives into the future but this is the end of this particular plot line. I hope everyone enjoyed it and I certainly hope that this chapter was worth the insanely long wait. I'm afraid it may be just as long for the next installment because I think that my Harry Potter fans might hunt me down if I don't update soon…eep!
Hope you liked it! Leave me a review…or else! j/k…except about leaving me a review…you should do that. Think of it this way…the more people that review the more likely I am to be suddenly inspired about what to have happen in the proposal…whoops, did I say that out loud?
