Disclaimer: I don't own Disney's Pirates of the Caribbean or any of its characters, and even if I did, the POTC characters that I portray doubtless would still cleverly escape my clutches.


Prologue

The Isle of Saint Lucia:

"You fiend! You monster! You—"

Captain Jack Sparrow held his hands up, placating. "Now, now, gents, let's be reasonable..."

"What have you done to my daughter?"

A rather stumpy, grey-haired gentleman shook his meaty fist at the colorful figure striking a pose amidships. The man he was menacing looked, by contrast, tall and authoritative, though this was perhaps due to the captain's leanness and slightly battered tricorn hat that added a few inches to his height. The aristocrat himself had burst from his home in such a fury that he was bareheaded, though he was otherwise clad in expensive saffron colored brocade.

"Actually," clarified the captain, "it'd be more precise to say 'with' your daughter, since she leapt into my arms of her own accord. Good thing she did, really...was taking quite a beating from some scoundrels in a back alley, though I don't know why she was there in the first place. Seemed to entertain the foolhardy idea that she could sneak out at night and meander about the streets unescorted. You really ought to keep an eye on her, mate."

"When I get my hands on you..." The gentleman, who went by the name of Mr. Hodges, looked ready to leap off the dock just to have at the rascal.

"Wouldn't advise tryin' that. I tend to be quite slippery. The hostage is being returned to you, as promised, with wounds bound and honor intact. Mostly," he added, recalling a few stolen kisses with a slight smile. "So there's really nothing to be upset about."

The pirate crew produced from below a pretty but distraught damsel who was howling hysterically and fighting her captors. Mr. Hodges winced. A fortnight past, he had received a message that his daughter had been captured by pirates, and now this devil's spawn was here to collect a handsome reward for her safe return. Judging from the distressed look on the maiden's face, however, the voyage had been quite an ordeal.

"You told me you treated her well!" Mr. Hodges pointed, outraged, at the girl, whose midnight black hair was bedraggled and whose eyes and nose were red from crying.

Jack started to explain. "And so I did, but unfortunately, that produced a few unintended consequences—"

The girl, with a sudden surge of energy, broke free and began to run.

The father stretched out his arms to his darling daughter. "Come here, Diana, I won't ever let them hurt you again!"

Diana took a final leap. Not towards her father, but towards Jack.

The pirate captain caught her expertly in his arms while she clung to his neck.

"Jack!" she sobbed. "Jack, don't leave me! Don't let me go!"

Her father stood slack-jawed in disbelief. "WHAT!"

Jack stroked her hair comfortingly. "Sh, shh, it's all right, Love, we're puttin' you back where you belong."

"Get your filthy paws off her!" the gentleman bellowed. However, this was a rather difficult directive to follow, as the girl was still clinging to Jack as if his mere presence were sustaining her.

"I-I d-don't want to go back," Diana sniveled.

Jack put out his hands in a gesture of helplessness. "It's not me fault she got attached!" he told the gentleman. "Although," he said reflectively, "I am rather dashin'...and handsome...and agile...and quick and charmin'... and witty..."

The irate parent wished he could have secured a small contingent of troops for the occasion. The terms of the agreement, however, had been quite explicit. No guards or military of any kind, and no pistols on his person.

While a frizzy-haired, middle-aged sailor and a tough-looking, stringy old mariner escorted the girl unwillingly off the ship, Jack skipped nimbly from down the gangplank of the sloop. It was smaller than his ship, the Black Pearl, and could be easily docked. The ship displayed its name in bold white letters: the Vendetta. Jack planted both boots on the dock, swiveled around, and pressed his hands together in thanks towards the dark-skinned woman at her helm.

The captain swaggered over to the richly garbed gentleman. "Haven't forgotten about the ransom, I hope?" he said, companionably draping an arm over Mr. Hodges' shoulder. His other hand was discreetly preoccupied with the man's pockets.

Mr. Hodges snarled and motioned to two of his slaves, who heaved three medium-sized and rather heavy chests aboard the Vendetta

As Jack trade girl for gold, Diana wailed and pleaded with Jack not to set her on dry land.

"This is most definitely the last female kidnappin' I'll perform," muttered Jack. "Why d'they always cry so much? First they tell me I'm a selfish prig, then they harp on bein' captured, and the next thing you know they're bemoanin' their return to shore."

The girl had stopped whining and was now raging. "I thought you loved me!" she screamed. "I thought I was special!"

Again Jack looked back at her, baffled. "Darlin', when did I ever give you the impression that you were any different from the rest o' my women? In fact, I remember tellin' you not to lose your heart to me, and frankly..." he looked her up and down, "I can't lament your absence too much, as there's many a Tortugan woman who's as well-endowed as you are."

This caused the disillusioned and heartbroken young lady to suffer a total collapse.

Jack looked a little guilty. "That's not to say you don't have a nice face," he added encouragingly.

Apparently, this wasn't much consolation.

"Is she ready to depart, Gibbs?" the pirate asked.

"Nay, Diana don't look quite ready—"

"The ship, mate," Jack said, with a slightly strained grin.

Gibbs nodded. "Aye, the anchor's hauled in, the sails're set. We're set for provisions, so we don't need to tarry. Soon as ye're finished, we'll pull up the gangplank."

"Wonderful."

"Oh, and Anamaria's says she'll flay ye alive if ye dare call her 'dearest treasure' aboard her ship again. She says ye need to call 'er Anamaria, or else Cap'n, same as everyone else."

"Got her temper up again, has she?" the captain nodded. "Give her Vendetta's share o' the ransom. That should keep her happy."

He admired the nice gold pocket watch that he had acquired. He flipped up the lid and shook it. "About four-thirty," he called gaily to Vendetta's crew. "Four thirty? No..." He turned the watch upside down. "Belay that, it's ten o'clock. Blasted Roman numerals."

At that moment, he got pelted with a few stale biscuits.

"Alright, Ana! I'm coming, I'm coming!"

Jack and Anamaria had an interesting relationship. It had begun when Jack had stolen Anamaria's fishing dory and sailed it into Port Royal. Anamaria had returned with a vengeance, becoming a crewmember on Jack's mission to get the Black Pearl back from the cursed captain Barbossa, in addition to leaving a sizeable imprint on his left cheek. True to his word, he had gotten Anamaria a replacement ship, and she had left off fishing in favor of sailing the high seas. Far from thanking Jack, she had taken an unsentimental leave, warning him not to cross her in the future and elbowing him in the gut for attempting a good-bye kiss. Still, the two ships were often seen in one another's company, performing raids together, although the female pirate had consistently refused Jack's offer to sail under his colors, thereby making him a commodore.

At the moment, the Vendetta's captain was more exasperated than incensed.

"Jack," called Anamaria irritably, "You tell time by the sun well enough, when you need to bother! What d'you need a watch for?"

"It looks nice!" the pirate protested. He lifted it experimentally to his locks. "Bit large for a hair ornament. Lessee."

He tried securing the timepiece to his belt and fixing it to his bandolier. Frowning, he threaded its chain through the thongs of the pickpocket pouch attached to his wrist. He made a few experimental flourishes with his hand.

He shook his head. "No. Not nearly creative enough. Pity."

It had been a rough few weeks for the crew of the Black Pearl. Hurricane season was wreaking havoc, storms beating against the islands before moving their way up to the Carolinas. There was talk, however, of a tremendous tempest brewing up north and spreading, of strange currents in the ocean moving contrary to the normal courses. Jack didn't trust most rumors that came from the taverns—after all, their patrons were usually inebriated and none too trustworthy even when sober—but in the past five or six weeks, the Black Pearl had been challenged by several new vessels whose routes normally went north. For all the naval ships chasing after the Pearl, there were definitely some advantages to being the last real pirate threat in the Caribbean, and Jack didn't want any more vessels encroaching on what he saw as his territory. If there was anything he could do to make his reputation more notorious...

"Cap'n!"

Both Anamaria and Jack looked in Gibbs' direction.

Gibbs handed the spyglass to Jack. "Another ship's entered the port! I can't tell what colors it's flying, it's too far off."

After taking a moment to peer through the glass, Sparrow nodded. "It's either a merchant boat or a naval ship. That vessel's too big to belong to any of the buccaneers around here."

"We'll move deeper into the cove," Anamaria announced, "close to the opening we spotted when we arrived. We'll squeeze through. Look lively, men!"

The Vendetta quickly got underway and made for the narrow cleft in the deep, knife-like rocks jutting up from the island. Once it was within reach of the opening, it stopped, baiting the larger ship to attack. By now, they had a clearer view. It was, indeed, one of the Navy.

Jack and his crewmen hurriedly loaded their share of the treasure into one rowboat and rowed as quickly as they could through the opening. He had anchored the Pearl just on the other side of the aperture, and though the weight of the treasure slowed them down considerably, they still managed to get out of sight before the naval ship closed in on the Vendetta.

Jack clambered aboard his ship, took the helm, and ordered the crew to weigh anchor. The sweeps were already out down below, and at his command the crew set to work with a vengeance. The Pearl sped around the thin black arm of the island, coming around towards the stern of the navy ship.

Boom!

The naval vessel had fired its warning shot over the bow of the Vendetta. Anamaria would not run; instead, she relied on her ship's agility to move quickly out of range and get in the first real shot. Her crew was experienced at firing cannons accurately. As the naval ship's second shot splintered starboard the railing, Anamaria swung the ship to the left and got two shots in before the naval ship could move into position to present its cannons properly.

The enemy's superior firepower gave it a marked advantage, but it had to beware the small ridges and outcropping stones that crested out from the steep rock, and it found it hard to maneuver in the narrow passage. It had just gotten the Vendetta broadside to broadside when another shot rocked into it from behind.

The Black Pearl had stolen up behind the ship, its oars gliding smoothly through the water, hugging the dark stone until the last minute to escape notice—an unnecessary precaution, as it turned out. These navy lads seemed quite keen on bloodletting, and had focused all of their energy on the fight in front of them. Their lookout had hot-headedly joined the fray and had caught a large chip of wood in his abdomen early on in the fight. Now, the Black Pearl swept in on the port side, firing shot after shot as it raked the ship. The Vendetta retreated farther down the narrow opening while the naval ship turned its attention to the Pearl. Then the Vendetta swooped in again and retreated once more.

The soldiers were bent on fighting to the finish, which didn't please either pirate captain very much, as they took on more damage than they would have liked. Still, the ship had been caught utterly by surprise. Their superiors had only warned them about the Vendetta, and the Pearl had traveled to the rendezvous point by another route. It didn't take long before the ship had capsized and its men left to swim to shore, if they could manage it.

Some of Anamaria's crew took shots at the men in the water, but most of them refrained, preferring to watch the naval men flounder about helplessly. The Black Pearl moved as close to the shore as it could safely get, then fired its cannon near the dock. Jack had figured that Mr. Hodges would call the Navy in, regardless of the pact, and that he would run if things went ill. Now, the pirate mentally calculated the distance that the portly man could sprint. The blast took Mr. Hodges off his feet and set his suit ablaze. Rather than douse the flames, he ran around frantically, screaming for help.

Jack shook his head at the bright figure while the crew laughed. Stupid, stupid man.

The Vendetta and the Pearl met up and assessed the damages. Two dead and eight wounded total—not a bad loss, especially when Jack stepped ashore again and found that the wealthy gentleman had stayed temporarily in the village. They plundered his house and a few of his neighbors', but didn't sack the whole town; they needed to get to Tortuga for repairs and had picked up more plunder on the way to the rendezvous.

Not feeling like being challenged on their return trip, the ships sailed together into the night.

"We did fine today, Jack, aye?" Anamaria called back to him.

"A splendid piece of work. I'll fire my cannon with you any day, Anamaria, darling!"

Apparently, the innuendo was not lost on Vendetta's captain, who told Jack to do something very unattractive to himself and two donkeys.

Gibbs restrained a chuckle. His captain was brilliant, if a bit addle-pated, but taking women's intentions seriously when it came to disliking him was not a great talent of Jack's. It was doubtful he would ever learn, or want to.

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Too short, too long, or too corny? Let me know!