Paris and Albert came walking into the Talon late one Saturday afternoon. They found Chloe in a U shaped both near the back and sat with her.

"Hey Chloe. What are you working on?" Paris asked happily as she sat down.

Chloe's eyes never left the computer screen in front of her. "Same old, same old. Someone didn't turn their article for the Torch in and I have to finish it."

"What's it on?"

"Our town's sad excuse for a football team." Chloe said, her voice full of resentment.

"Why so hostile Sullivan?" Albert asked, amused.

Chloe ran her hands through her hair in frustration. "I just don't understand worshipping a team that has gone winless for six straight seasons. At the risk of sounding clichéd, this quaint little farming town is overflowing with herd mentality."

The cousins just chuckled and let her get back to her work.

"Hey guys." Lana walked up to the table with her order pad in hand. "You look oddly comfortable for just coming from Metropolis." She said, noting Albert's grey track pants and sweatshirt and Paris' black pj pants and sweatshirt.

"Well my brilliant cousin feels that if we are unfortunate enough to be in the office on Saturday we should be as comfortable as possible. Unfortunately she failed to mention that the interior designer is scrumptious enough to have just fallen out of the Abercrombie catalogue. And I walked in looking like this."

Paris turned to Albert. "Okay you're a diva and you were absolutely no help today so I don't want to hear another word about you walking in looking like glorified butt." There was a hint of joking in her voice. Then she turned to Lana. "You'd be surprised Lana. The entertainment industry is quite lax in the way of dress code."

"Well either way, sounds like you two have had quite a day."

"Yes we have and if I have to look at one more paint or fabric swatch I'm going to impale someone with my cell phone, and I really like this phone." Paris said.

Lana chuckled. "Well we don't want that. What can I get you to drink?"

Albert ordered first. "Coffee, black, please Lana."

"And for you Paris?"

"Caramel macchiato, two extra espresso shots, foam, no whipped cream, soy milk. Thanks Lana." She closed here eyes and laid her head on the back of the booth.

"As you can see I am significantly less high maintenance than my cousin."

Paris didn't even look over. "Suck it and you're still a diva."

"Someone's in a mood."

"Someone bugged me all day."

Lana smiled and shook her head, they fought like brother and sister. "Chloe do you want a re-fill?" No answer. "Earth to Chloe. Woohoo, come in Chloe!" Lana waived a hand in front of her face.

Chloe snapped out of her computer trance and looked up at Lana, blinking. "Huh? What?"

Lana looked at her concerned. "Do you want a refill?"

She smiled a little. "Sure that'd be great." Lana left to get their orders.

"You need to get some sleep. You're too young to be lost in the coffee haze." Paris said, concerned.

"No I'm fine. I just need to get some competent reporters on the Torch." Chloe said, agitated.

Paris' cell phone started playing Weezers' 'Island in the sun.' "Ooh it's Mack." Paris smiled happily and answered the call. "Hellooo.... Sweetie please, stop yelling at the Bostonians, they're not from New York. They don't like it....What's wrong?... I'm sorry, I know law school is hard." She let out a chuckle. "Believe me my life is not as fun as it looks all the time... Okay fine my life is significantly more fun than law school... Oh Albert's sitting next to me laughing at you..." She turned to him. "She says you're a schmuck."

"I miss her too."

"Albert says hi... No Lex is at home working. Hopefully he'll be here soon... Here's what you need to do. Go to Sephora, or Ulta, whichever's closest. Buy new nail polish and paint your toes. Then pick out a cute outfit and shoes and go out and make all the uptight law school boys drool... I know I'm the best friend ever... When's fall break?..."

Lex walked up to the table. "Hello everyone. Chloe may I?" He motioned to get it.

"Fine." Chloe huffed and slid out so he could slide in next to Paris.

"Didn't mean to bother you Chloe."

"You didn't." She said dismissively, then went back to typing.

"Hi." Paris said, sounding tired and sad with a slight pout, then continued talking to Mack. "Yeah I think I can get home that weekend... A weekend in the city should keep the dad happy for awhile, at least until the holidays... No, he's been surprisingly civil lately, but that won't last long I'm sure of it... Fine it'll be just me.... Yes I know you like Lex and it's nothing against him, I'm sure he won't be too hurt... Okay we will eat Krispy Kremes and Gray's Papaya and, ooh, and Dim Sum Ed's until they have to roll us out the door because we can't move in our sugar induced MSG laden coma... Of course we can have Ben and Jerry's, what do we put on the donuts if we don't? " She smiled at her friends odd ballness. "They opened a new club....What's it called? Club what?... That's what I thought you said..." She sounded suspicious. "They had one here in Metropolis but it closed a few years ago, maybe they franchised the name. Anyway, we can always go to Hedonism. Are our pictures still on the wall?..." She smiled at the images that memory conjured up, and what they did to earn a spot on the wall of fame. "Alright, Lex is here now so I'll talk to you later. Alright bye." She hung up the phone and pillowed her head on her arms on the table. "Kill me now." She mumbled tiredly.

"Your chat with Mack not go well?" Lex asked sympathetically.

"No, that was fine. I'm just glad we have mobile to mobile or I'd run out of minutes every time she has a crisis."

"You have 5000 daytime minutes and unlimited nights and weekends." Albert said, alarmed.

"You know I use almost all my daytime minutes and that's not the point." Paris sat up a little too fast and smacked her head on the wall behind her. "Oww." She groaned and rubbed the sore spot. "Anyway when she's in a mood, especially a bad one she can talk for hours and I mean hours. We once had a 5 hour phone conversation because she lost a shoe. Now it was a bad ass pair of shoes I borrowed them many a time, but it just capped off a shitty week."

"I see. Maybe you should try couples therapy because you two are completely co-dependant. Does Lex know your relationship consists of three people?"

"Are not. And yet again, suck it diva boy."

"Whatever, Grace."

"I'm talking to Lex now." She turned to Lex with a well placed pout on her face. "I had to look at paint swatches all day and he didn't do anything but hit on the designer."

"I'm sorry." He put his arm around her and pulled her to him, she rested her head on his shoulder and waited for Lana to come with their drinks. "What else happened?"

"I got up at 6:00 to go to Metropolis and I haven't seen you in two days. Oh and I have the house guest from hell."

"You can ship him to the castle."

"Excuse me but no, I'm sorry mate but your father still scares me a bit."

"No one's talking to you." Paris reminded him.

"You're talking about me."

She was about to say something to Albert but Lana came with their orders. She took a sip of her drink and calmed down a bit. "Did you know they opened a Club Zero in New York?" She asked Lex.

He stopped drinking mid swallow, but masked his surprise. "No I didn't. I don't think it's a good idea to go there though."

"Why not? I mean we used to have fun there when I'd visit you at MetU."

"The clientele changed. It has a bad reputation, that's why the one here closed." He had to cover for the truth, and he hated lying to her but this was not the place to have the Club Zero discussion.

She just shrugged her shoulders, "It's not like there aren't 500 other clubs in the city," and went back to her drink. "Albert can you get out I have to go to the bathroom?"

"Well I've been so unhelpful today why would I move to let you out?" Albert said smugly.

"Oh come on. You were oogling the interior decorator all freakin day while I had to deal with six feet of pushy blonde assistant who may have gotten her decorating degree at the Metropolis school for the blind. I would have been better off going to Ikea by myself and figuring it out." Her eyes were wide with disbelief as she spoke and waited for him to move. "You know what, fine." She drew her legs up onto her seat, stood up and stepped over Albert.

"What was that about?" Lex asked.

Albert turned to Lex. "Lex mate, can you please get her out of the house for a few days? I'll even watch the pooch just get her away from me."

"Albert it's her house. She has the right to be there."

"Yes, but wherever I am she's there too. Home she's there, work she's there. Anywhere I go in town she's there. It's like living with my mother, but Paris is not as overbearing, but that's not the point. I don't remember it being this hard to be around her so much. I can't take it anymore. How did you two live together and not kill each other?"

Chloe let out a snort from across the table, earning a surprised look from the other two occupants. She looked up from the computer. "What? If you're going to invade my work space I'm going to over hear your conversations, proceed."

Lex turned back to Albert. "Albert I live in an 80 room castle. If you want to get away from someone you can. Hell there's still a wing I've never been in and I don't plan on it any time soon."

"Well that's all fine and dandy for you but I am going to hang myself with the bed sheets if I have to endure this much longer."

Clark walked up to the table. "Isn't that a little drastic?"

"You've never lived with my cousin."

Clark just nodded and slid in next to Albert, Chloe was too engrossed in her article to notice him. "Hi Chloe." He was greeted with a nod and a grunt. "Nice to see you too."

"Shit!" Chloe cursed. drawing looks from the table's other three occupants. She had a new E-mail from Lionel demanding an audience with her.

"Problem Chloe?" Lex asked.

"No. My editor wants to see me like five minutes ago. I've got to go." SHe gathered her stuff and left quickly.

"Is it me or is she getting odder?" Clark asked.

"She's just distracted Clark. She's fine." Lex assured him, though he had his doubts.

Albert turned back to Lex. "So are you going to do it?"

"Do what?" Paris asked standing next to Clark. Albert stopped talking with a deer in the headlights look on his face. "Don't try lying Albert, because you're terrible at it. Did you have fun talking about me?"

"Peanut I think we've been spending too much time together." Albert said with more confidence because he was behind Clark and six foot four of burly farm boy should be able to keep Paris from strangling him.

"I agree."

He was trying to cover. "And you know I've been apartment hunting but it's hell in Metropolis."

"I agree."

"So you're not going to hurt me?"

"Not in public."

He turned to Lex. "Lex can I come live with you?"

"Albert I'm joking..."

She was cut off when someone spoke to her from behind. "Hey rock star."

She turned and was face to face with her ex. "What the hell could you possibly want? And have you forgotten about the matter of a restraining order?"

"Well it's September, and you know what that means."

"Damn it."

"That's right. No more restraining order. It expired and you seem to have forgotten to get it renewed."

Lex was sitting quietly in the booth, but the tick in his jaw showed that he was about to pounce.

"Well I've been a bit occupied. Let's make this simple what do you want and how did you know where to find me?"

"Do you know how out of place a new BMW looks in a farming town in Kansas? You really should try to blend better with the locals if you want to escape the past. Maybe driving a late model Toyota or some kind of off road vehicle with naked women on the mud flaps." He reached out to tuck a hair behind her ear but she swatted his arm away in the blink of an eye. He chuckled and took a step back. "Still testy I see."

"You could say that, or that I don't like to be touched by dirty things. Cut to the chase before I utilize the liberal gun laws of Kansas."

"Fine. You have something I want."

Paris crossed her arms over her chest and pretended to ponder his statement. "My money?"

He let out a forced chuckle. "Funny. No when we separated I was writing a script and I can't find it anywhere."

"Well that's because I destroyed your hard drive."

"Yeah, that was really fun to try and fix, but I had it backed up on a jump drive."

"Yeah I burned that, it may still be melted to the bottom of the pool. Isn't it a bit late to be looking for a script I erased over a year ago?"

"Well I was a bit busy with work until now."

"Meaning you got fired for punching out the head writer. People tell me things."

"Anyway I heard back from Paramount, they read the partial I sent in and want the rest."

"Sorry it's gone." She said with no emotion in her voice.

He took a step toward her, looming over her smaller form. "You had better not be lying to me."

"And if I am? What're you going to do about it?" She decided to screw with him.

Clark saw Jeremy ball up his fist, and if the expression on his face were anything to gauge his temper by he may take a swing at her so Clark decided to slide out and stand behind her. Albert and Lex slid out after him and stood next to each other, forming a wall behind her.

Jeremy took a look at the army that had assembled behind her and decided to start with Lex. "Well hey captain Piccard I thought you were dead, something about a disgruntled spouse and an airplane."

Lex chose to ignore the remark. "She doesn't have what you want so I suggest you leave Smallville and not come back."

Jeremy pretended to be wounded. "Paris are you really going to let a man speak for you? I thought you were the strong feminist type." He decided to taunt Lex some more. "I mean she's always been aggressive in bed. Still is right?"

"Jeremy if you know what's good for you, you will turn around and leave right now. Or I will let Lex beat the living crap out of you, and I know what to do with the body when he's done. You have heard of LuthorCorp fertilizers haven't you?"

"As intimidating as your little entourage is I must digress. If you and your coat tail riding cousin try to make my movie I will destroy you, bit by bit."

"You'd have to catch me first."

"Look mate I can promise you that even if that script did find it's way into mine or my cousin's possession we'd never entertain the thought of making it. Simply put you're a hack, you won't last very long without your staff."

"Well if it isn't the big bad poof come out to play. How's it going Albert?"

Lana came up. "Hey guys, what's going on here?"

"Nothing. An old friend of Paris' came to town but he was just leaving." Clark said not taking his eyes off the older man.

"Oh. Well if anyone breaks anything they're paying for it." Lana said, and walked away.

"My, my the farm boy speaks. Well Paris I see you are having your cake and eating it too."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Paris asked indignant.

"Come on, in one corner you have the billionaire playboy. Someone in the same league as you, an acceptable date for social functions, you can smile pretty for the cameras, fuck like bunnies, have long meaningful after sex conversations, and still be at work on time. And in the other corner you have the farm boy, innocent, tall, dark, almost mysterious, plus he has hair. I'm sure all the farmers' daughters are throwing themselves at his feet. You get the thrill of slumming it and the danger of being caught. And it seems to me that the two are friends. Don't choke on those little sprinkles."

Paris stepped toward him. "You have no idea how wrong you are or how dangerous it is for you to be insinuating that. Not to mention that I'm not the one who had a problem with fidelity. If you don't leave right now they will be picking you up off the floor and I'm not afraid to go to jail for killing you. I suggest you get back in your car and forget how to get here."

"Well I can tell when I'm not welcome. See ya later rock star." He gave a wave and walked out.

Paris just stared angrily at the back of his head, as if it would make him burst into flames.

After he was gone Lex walked up behind her and wrapped na arm around her waist. "Don't let him bug you."

"I know. Let's go home."

"Okay."

----Jeremy's car----

He was speeding through Smallville talking to himself. "Stupid Bitch! I can't believe she fucked me like that. Well we'll see what she has to say when I'm done with her." As if on cue there was a boulder in the road. He swerved to miss it but wound up in Crater Lake. "Oh shit!"