The Offer
Rating: PG13
Genre: Humour/General
Challenge: 905 A student offers another 100 Galleons for sex, and the other seriously considers taking that person up on it.
Disclaimer: I own nothing related to Harry Potter. This was written simply as a diversion to boredom.
A/N: At the moment I can't remember where I got this prompt from, but if I ever find the site again, I will be sure to post it. For now, let it be known that this was not my own idea. This was written pre-HBP, Lavender was just a random Gryffindor girl I picked.
"Please, Lavender!"
"Oh, Ron, give it up now. I know what you're playing at."
"No, no, I'm serious. 100 Galleons!"
"Seriously! Now, where would you get that type of money?"
"I spent my whole summer doing jobs. This and that, odds and ends, you know."
"And you'd spend it all on this?"
"Yes!"
"Why?"
"Well…because you're beautiful…"
"Like hell I am! Tell me something I haven't heard before. You aren't doing this for me."
"Well…"
"You're just a pig. A pig that can't even find a girl on his own."
"Oh, I could. I could. I have. I just don't fancy going through all the hugs and kisses, all the anniversaries and birthday before I can even get a bloody shag!"
"That just makes you a lazy pig, then."
"Yes, well…well…"
"Well…?"
"Well, will you do it or not, then!"
"Well, if you could give me time to think!"
"You didn't need this much time to think before you decided to do Robert, did you?"
"Hey! Who told you that?"
"Uh…"
"It was Parvati, wasn't it?"
"Err…"
"Wasn't it?"
"I overheard it! Is all."
"Well, who was talking about it?"
"Robert and some pretty Ravenclaw girl…I don't know her name…"
"It isn't true anyway…Oh you mean Allison?"
"No, no, not quite…"
"Pretty! Pretty! You're trying to buy me and here you go calling other girls pretty!"
"Amy! It was Amy."
"And if Amy's so pretty, why don't you go offer her 100 Galleons for a shag!"
"Well…because…because you're here and she isn't."
"Because you know she'd say no and I'd say yes!"
"Bloody joke! I overheard her and Robert. She's gone and shagged the ugly bastard more times than you ever did."
"He is not an ugly bastard. He's cuter and less of a bastard than you!"
"What'd I ever go and do to be called a bastard? Besides-"
"Besides this! You're the only boy stupid enough to go and try this."
"Brave enough."
"Coward enough."
"Bloody hell! Will you or won't you?"
"…"
"Well…? It's not like it's your first time and something sacred or whatever like girls think."
"Oh…"
"What?"
"You're such a…a…"
"A what?"
"Yes."
"Yes what? You're bloody confusing."
"Yes, I…"
"You will!"
"I never said that!"
"Well, you were about to."
"Well, I won't."
"What?"
