Chapter 19
Turquoise melody
"The time slips away,
days unmercifully going astray
A heart, torn and broken
Left in the cold after it just had awoken…"
At the sound of the soft sung words, Golbez's dark eyes opened slowly and began to pierce the ceiling with their stare as if it held the answer to where he was and why he was there.
Finally, realization filled as his gaze as well as a staid calmness - a calmness that wasn't wavering although Golbez knew that he did not have to search for Leah at his side. She was gone.
"The empty silk left your soul full of chill
Trying to warm on the wish that she remembers you still…"
As the song continued, Golbez stood up, brushed his slight ruffled, long dark hair behind his bare back and grabbed his black shirt from the floor. Pulling it over his head, he made his way towards the window, nearly tripping over his boots.
"The salty tears fall on the earth-"
As he opened the pane, a surprisingly mild breeze flooded the room. The sun was shining brightly outside - the snow was melting. Down, in the inner courtyard of the inn, Edward was engrossed in playing his lute, sitting with bended waist on a bench, his golden locks falling into his face.
"Up so early?" Golbez shouted down, wondering why he couldn't bring his voice to sound ironical if he already had to pose such a senseless question - after all it was visible that Edward had awoken early. But humans were stating the obvious all the time, weren't they?
And if he thought about it-
"No harm in that…"
Upon hearing Golbez's words, Edward gave a start and with an apologizing expression, he peered up. "I'm sorry that I woke you up…"
"Don't worry - is that the song you played at the beach?"
"Yes… I suddenly knew how the melody continued," the bard replied warily, "But I'll stop since-"
"No," Golbez managed a smile that wasn't as friendly as the one of other people, but genuine at least. "Please go on. It's still tacky… but somehow… it seems to contain some kind… of truth."
A knowing smile was playing on Edward's lips. "I know…I saw Leah leaving just some time ago…"
Plucking the strings with his fingers, he started to sing anew once more:
"The salty tears fall on the earth,
Not only for her
but for the fact that you're not worth…
But in the end,
though everything is in vain
You know that you'll always have one hope to claim:"
While listening to the tune, Golbez walked slowly towards the small table in his room. On it, a piece of paper was attached - "With a dagger," as he noticed with a raised eyebrow and an amused smile on his lips.
"That if she would see
What you're really trying to be
She would come back
So the time slipping away would not matter in your track."
On the note something had been written with big letters:
I'll be watching you.
And he knew that she would.
xOx
In contrast to Edward, Tristan seemed to be surprised to meet Golbez in the main hall of the inn, if not appalled…
"You are still here?" The swindler pretended to look happy, but the paleness in his face was conspicuous. "I thought you had gone either with Leah or were off to the moon, pal…" He tried to reach the door, but Golbez was faster and blocked his way.
"Do you want to leave without saying goodbye, pal? After all, we still have to talk about some things, I believe." Golbez crossed his arms before his chest.
"Are you threatening me again!" Tristan blurted out reproachfully, but suddenly, his mouth curved into a sly grin. "But wait - you're a good guy now, right? A good guy without magic he can extort others with!"
Golbez did not bat an eyelid. "I wouldn't be so sure about the "good" part, Tristan, and you are hardly in any position of speaking about "goodness", anyway. I believe that the Elder would be quite interested in your collaboration with Ko Min." He let a menacing smile follow, noticing to his contentment that there were still some means left to him to scare even an impossibly self-assured Tristan.
"You are joking, right? I thought we had already spoken about this! I know that I made some mistakes and I promised that I'll never take on a mission to kill someone, again." Tristan tried to set up the regretting look of a converted sinner, but changed it for his "I'm your best friend" expression a moment later. "And don't forget that we had some… nice times, too. I did help you, you know…"
"Yes. Mainly in bringing my nerves to the tether." Golbez countered in his familiar dry tone. "And I even paid you for it… You know what I am getting at, right? You probably took it while I was fighting against the poison and-"
"Ohhh… That! How could I forget that?" Tristan said in exaggerated helpfulness. "Of course you can have back the ring if you wish…"
"I do wish so. It might be the one thing that will keep me from beating you up. I have lost my magic, but my physical abilities are still -slightly- above average," Golbez explained calmly, trying his best not to grin. "It's the hard climate on the moon, you know."
"Okay, okay - it's right here!" Tristan had finally found the ring in the dark depths of his pocket and with a sullen expression and obvious aversion, he let the Baronian treasure fall into Golbez's outstretched hand. "Such a waste…"
"Well, Sir Tristan- it is like Master FuSoYa had said: Giving is harder than taking." A friendly, soft chuckle came from the direction of the table Edward was sitting at.
"Since when is he so… bold?" Tristan eyes became little insulted slits. "I liked him better when he was still the rich and gutless King…"
"You should hope that he does not regain more of his guts, or you might find yourself in the Damcyan prison for trying to kill their ruler," Golbez said coldly and left for Edward's place.
He had to admit, though that Tristan had been right in one aspect - Edward had definitely changed. He was of course still the slight built minstrel, who was better skilled with the lute than with the sword, but his bearing was no longer as fearful as before, his head no longer bent and in the eyes of other there seemed to sparkle a calm light - it were the eyes of someone who had found, or at least knew what to search for…
"So, what will you do now?" Golbez sat down opposite of Edward. "Will you return to your Kingdom?"
"My Kingdom?" Edward shook his head. "No, it was never my Kingdom… It was the Kingdom of my parents and now, it's the Kingdom of the chancellor who will surely take good care of it in my absence. My Kingdom was my love to Anna and has been destroyed long ago…"
He did not avoid Golbez's gaze like he usually did when talking about this subject, but regarded him attentively.
"So now it starts…" Edward's gaze filled Golbez with uneasiness-he had always believed that only his guilt was a thing of the present, while his doings belonged to the past - now, he understood that both were a very actual thing: For the young man opposite of him, Golbez's deeds were still present; the rage, the sorrow and these last traces of fear in the bard's pale blue gaze were more present than anything else.
Golbez had been able to run away from the past, but to escape the present was impossible and thus, he could not escape the fact that Edward's gaze, this stare that seemed to ask 'why', hurt his very soul.
"What are you supposed to do now? What are you supposed to say?"
"I'm sorry," Golbez said quietly - he had uttered these words before, but never before had he felt how his pale skin coloured with the red of shame while doing it...
Edward had obviously never seen it before as well and was now regarding him with an expression between astonishment and contentment, but also, sympathy.
"I… know that you were sorry all along. And still, you do not make it easy for people to forgive you, especially me. I have to admit that during the journey, my hate towards you did not lessen, but often… grew instead," Edward's voice was composed, although he spoke low as if to hide his own courage in front of others. "I don't know why she left," he continued, "but I'm sure that it has to do with the road you chose - and with the road she chose for you. And that will be a hard one."
A little bitter, but also slightly amused smile crossed Golbez's face. "Yes… She has chosen a fine punishment for me, indeed…"
"But maybe it will help you to atone if it is redemption you wish for. And if you try to atone, I can also try to forgive you." Edward was showing a faint smile now.
"I fear that an insufficient "thank you" is the only thingI can give you in return," Golbez said earnestly, "But maybe you don't need more. I can see that you have become stronger, King Edward - it is good that way. Too many people have been broken by my actions." It was true appreciation that spoke out of his voice.
"I'm still not as strong as I wish to be, but it will be enough to begin traveling down my road, as well," the bard replied, "although I don't know yet where it will lead me. I will journey around the Blue Planet until I know where my destination lies - be it in the feeling that I can care for Damcyan after all, or something else. Where will you go?" It was clear that Edward wanted to change the subject and Golbez gladly respected his wish.
"I'll return to Baron as soon as I can…" he answered. "There's a promise I made to Cecil and I don't think he'd be glad if I were to break it…"
Like Golbez's words before, it was now Edward's smile that was filled with acknowledgement. "You are taking the hard road, indeed."
Golbez was glad for the bard's gesture - as much as Edward's gaze had hurt him before, he could now feel how the other's friendly smile smothered the flickering shame in him, making the red tint leave his face and soul.
The short moment of mutual, peaceful approval between the two was destroyed by Tristan, who had silently crept towards his companions in order to lean over the table and to now grin broadly into Golbez face.
"Did I hear something about Baron? How do you want to get there?"
"Not again…"
"You-" Golbez felt the familiar urge to erase the narcissistic expression on the other's face, but he knew that even physical abuse would not be able to achieve that.
Tristan used the hesitation of his companion to chatter on. "Since the snow is melting, the sea passage to Baron will soon be clear again. I might know a Mysidian who would be willing to give us a crossing. You know that you have no choice…"
Indeed, Golbez knew by now that it was no use to argue with the other.
"How much?" he asked.
"I just want back the ring."
Golbez's hand covered his forehead that had started to hurt, again. "Alright. It isn't for Mary by any chance?"
"For whom?" The swindler looked like he doubted the other's sanity. "Are you kidding?"
"Thought so… You'll never change…"
"Yes, some people do change, others not... It's all a matter of choice…"Edward remarked pensively.
"And of necessity!" Tristan was not going to be deprived of having the last word.
"And I'm already perfect."
xOx
Just one week later, Golbez and Tristan arrived on a ship near Baron Harbour. On the way towards the town and the castle, Golbez had to experience once more that the people were regarding him differently than before although not in the fashion he had expected - instead of meeting him with open hostility, they seemed rather… disinterested, as if they knew, just as the Mysidian mages, that his powers were no longer a danger to anyone.
"Could it be so easy?"
Golbez presumed, though, that it was only a matter of time before he would get confronted by the hate of the people in another less harmless and less hurting manner, and he could only hope that more people would give him another chance like Edward had done.
"At least Cecil will be truly happy to see me…"
For the first time, he accepted how glad he was to meet his brother, although it pained him slightly to accept that Cecil had been right with so many things, including their father - the Paladin had always believed in Klu Ya and now Golbez was filled by a biting bad conscience about having always scolded the other for it.
"But you don't have to admit this in front of Cecil right away, do you?"
Finally, the gates of Baron castle came into view. Strangely enough, they were the most familiar thing - "Next to Leah's face..." - that he had seen during the last weeks and their sight filled him with a sense of safety and contentment. The castle guards were obviously less pleased to see him and had taken on a defensive stance upon spotting him.
"What is that for a welcome?" As expected, Tristan, who had been agitatedly following him since the harbour, did not feel intimidated at all. "The mighty Golbez has returned to Baron. Behave respectfully towards him and me or he will fry - err, beat you to pieces!" He bit his lip as he obviously remembered that things had slightly changed.
"Please pay no attention to him," Golbez grumbled - he had stopped wasting his strength by getting excited over Tristan's behaviour. "I'm not here to make trouble. I just want to see my brother, his Highness, if it is possible."
"Of course," one guard stepped aside, eying only Tristan suspiciously. "We were just worried for a moment concerning your… travel companion. Please go on through, Master Golbez."
"Cecil must have ordered to let me into the castle at any time…"
Golbez realized once more how much his brother trusted him.
"This time, I'll try to be worthy of it." He wasn't sure, though, if bringing Tristan with him was a good step in that direction.
"Why are you so eager to accompany me, anyway? I'll not pay you more for this…" he asked frowning while crossing the courtyard of the castle.
Tristan was regarding the imposing stony building in awe. "Why should I miss the chance to meet the famous and probably very rich King of Baron whose brother-"
"-you tried to kill…"
Tristan shrugged, unmoved. "Don't be so petty-minded."
xxx
As they entered the Throne Room, the young King of Baron was currently absorbed in a discussion with his chancellor. Golbez mused that for most people, Cecil was probably the embodiment of everything that could get called "kingly" with his snowy white hair, which was held by the crown of the Paladin, the well-fitting red ornamented cloak, the calmness he radiated and his soft, but firm way of speaking. In fact, Golbez could agree with the people, but he also knew that Cecil was good at hiding his worries and probable uncertainties - and most of these always had to do either with his new responsibilities as a Paladin or… with Golbez. And one look at the other, who had by now gotten aware of the visitors and had turned his head towards them, proved his assumptions to be true. Cecil's blue eyes were as awake and earnest as always, but there was also pain in them, pain that now changed into utter surprise.
"Golbez…" Cecil looked at his brother with widened eyes, like he had seen a ghost. "You're still here? Our astronomers say that the moon is leaving the orbit of the Blue Planet and I thought-"
Golbez raised an eyebrow. "Didn't I promise you that I would return? If I'm not welcome, though-"
"You still cannot stop mocking him…" For some reason Golbez knew that no matter how hard he would try to work on it, this was some character trait he wouldn't be able to get rid of…
"But… but of course you're welcome!" Losing himself finally out of his rigidity, Cecil approached his brother, offering his hand nearly shyly, obviously unsure how to behave - Golbez realized how hostile he had always reacted on any sign of sympathy his brother had tried to show him. Like to undo the many times he had refused a brotherly embrace, Golbez took first Cecil's hand and then, after some hesitation pulled the other closer to hug him.
"I'm sorry if I made you worry," he said earnestly.
The look of confusion on Cecil's face grew and loosening himself out of the embrace, he took a step back, regarding the other skeptically. "Are... are you alright? I received your letter… It sounded so strange - not like you at all…"
Golbez cleared his throat and glanced at Tristan. "A… letter? Tristan - did you send it?"
His travel companion paled only slightly: "Well, the idea to finish it came to me in Kaipo. I wrote only nice things about you in it… and about me, of course. You see…" he grinned sheepishly. "It would have diverted suspicion from me if I had succeeded in killing you-"
"Killing you?" Just now Cecil noticed for the first time the presence of the other. "And you are-"
"Your loyal citizen Tristan!" The flaxen haired swindler made an expansive bow. "Always at your service, Your Majesty!"
"Don't trust him a minute," Golbez remarked dryly towards Cecil.
"Golbez, who is this man? He wanted to kill you? And why is he wearing the ring I gave you?" Cecil looked back and forth between Golbez, Tristan and the chancellor, who was urging him to continue their conference. Finally, he calmed down a bit and his face took on a weary expression. "I'm sorry for all the questions…" The Paladin ran a hand through his hair, a habit which as Golbez had remarked, the other only showed when confused or nervous. "This is of course not the welcome you should get, Golbez, but right now things are a bit in an uproar. Edward has disappeared from castle Damcyan and-"
"Cecil, Edward is well," Golbez interrupted him in a calm tone.
"Golbez?" A female voice uttered, surprised. Cecil's wife, Rosa, had just entered the Throne room and was looking at the ex-wizard with big, but friendly eyes. It had always been a mystery to Golbez how forgiving Rosa had acted towards him despite the abduction, but he was glad about one person less who felt intimidated by his presence.
"So you have returned, after all!" Golbez was not sure of it was really because of his return, but Rosa was smiling brilliantly. "It seems that this day brings only good news."
Golbez returned her welcome with a friendly nod, keeping Tristan with one hand at bay. As soon as the young Queen of Baron had entered the room, the swindler was behaving like a tom cat in heat.
"You didn't tell me that she was so beautiful…" he whispered. "Look at her hair - it shines like gold!"
"Neither her hair nor her gold should be of any interest to you!" Golbez replied, hissing. "She's married to my brother so - hands off!"
He decided to say something to distract from Tristan's hungry stares. "Only good news? Of what other news are you speaking of, Rosa?"
Rosa's cheeks coloured with an excited flush. "Oh that… I'd like to speak with Cecil in private about this…" She gave an expectant look towards her husband.
Cecil smiled at her apologizingly. "Please wait just one moment, darling…" He focused his attention on Golbez, again. "You were with Edward? Where is he?"
"I don't know, but I have the feeling that he might return to Damcyan one day when he has found his way."
"Cecil, I'm worried about Edward, too, but I really need to tell you something, now," Rosa urged.
Cecil wasn't listening to her. "One day? Excuse me, but there's a Kingdom he has to rule…"
"Not that I know much of politics, but aren't there enough chancellors for that?" Tristan wondered, not removing his gaze from Rosa.
"And what about the sudden movement of the moon?" Cecil was now inquiring.
Golbez decided to bring the news to his brother as short and sweet as he could. "The moon is leaving the Blue Planet together with the Lunarians and will never return. FuSoYa told me to give you his best wishes."
"FuSoYa left on the moon? Forever?" Cecil looked at him with unbelieving eyes.
"Cecil, it's really important!" It was not hard to see that Rosa was slowly losing her patience. The chancellor seemed to think so, too, but was watching the whole discussion with the proper reserve.
"Brother, I understand that you have a lot of questions and I will try to answer them as best as I can, but right now, your wife seems to have something more important to talk with you about." Golbez tried to help, earning Rosa's grateful look in return.
"That's right - do I need to shout to gain your attention, Cecil Harvey?" she asked and Golbez couldn't hide a grin - he had seldom seen Cecil's wife as agitated as now.
Cecil was still trying to digest everything he had just heard. "Err... Yes." He said absentmindedly before his attention was focused on Golbez once more: "About the moon… Why did Fu-"
"Cecil!" Rosa's voice echoed though the room. "I'm pregnant!"
Cecil's mouth stayed open as he looked at her with big eyes.
"Congratulations Rosa…" Golbez said, smiling, his eyebrow rising. "That's what one says in spite of such an occasion, I hope."
Rosa did not mind his uncertain question and laughed. "That's right."
Cecil was still staring.
"Damn! I came too late… Married and with child is no good…" Tristan hissed under his breath and smiled falsely. "What wonderful news for the Kingdom, Your Majesty."
Rosa beamed happily, though then a frown crossed her pretty face. "I'm not sure if everyone here thinks so… Cecil?"
Her husband was still not saying anything, fixed like someone had glued him to the floor.
"I'm not good in such matters, but shouldn't you say something?" Golbez regarded his brother frowning, though a faint amusement was playing on his features - Rosa had managed something that Golbez seldom had accomplished in long arguments with Cecil - the young King of Baron had seemingly lost his voice and was gaping like a stupefied Edge in his worst moments.
"The child is yours, isn't it?" Tristan asked, then held a hand before his mouth. "Oops... shouldn't have said that…" He didn't sound truly sorry.
Luckily, Cecil had not heard him, although his mouth finally was moving again. "Rosa… That… is... wonderful news!" Laughing, he embraced his wife and whirled her around, only to set her down gently the next second. "Oh, sorry - I shouldn't do this - it might not be good for the child and-" Despite the worry in his voice, it was obvious that the former shock had yielded to utter joy.
"Seems that he isn't aware of the fact that soon, he will probably have more problems on his shoulders than just his Kingdom and me…" it crossed Golbez's mind, but he did not speak out the thought. After all, there was no need to behave more teasing than necessary, no matter how uncomfortable this moment, which was a bit too emotional for Golbez's liking, made him feel.
To his surprise, Rosa had thought similar to him, though. "My dear Cecil - why don't you try to save up your worries for later, when the child has been born?" She smiled and kissed him, lost for a moment in a world where only the two of them existed. It was a world Golbez believed to understand slightly better now, although he was sure that the relationship of the two differed greatly from what he and Leah had experienced - be it in terms of harmony or in terms of-
"Unpredictable temper…" An involuntary chuckle escaped Golbez and he was so lost in his memories that he nearly didn't notice that Cecil and Rosa had focused her attention back on him.
"We all know that Cecil cannot stop worrying, right Golbez?" The Queen of Baron smiled. "He was also, like me, worried about you…"
"Presumed so." Golbez nodded. "And maybe you were even right to worry about me… It was long journey and there's much I have to tell you. About Mt. Ordeals and about-"
"Dawn?" Cecil, his arms still around Rosa, suddenly grew very earnest again. "Any news?"
"I cannot understand that her body was never found…" For a second, Rosa's expression was no longer filled with joy, but with helpless sorrow - the death of their friend had hit her as hard as anyone else. "Not even her cape or the weapon she was killed with--"
Golbez wasn't paying attention to what she said next, as another thought struck him.
"The dagger…"
/I'll be watching you…/
No, not again…
"Never again."
"Well, Golbez has met a wo- Ouch!" Tristan was efficiently silenced by Golbez's fingers digging in his arm. The dark haired man shook his head.
"I'm sorry to tell you that I haven't found out anything, as well. However, if she was still alive, Dawn would have returned here by now. I fear that we will have to accept her death, but that will not keep us from always keeping her memory alive…" he said with a solemn face.
"That is right…" Cecil's voice was hovering between grief and confidence. "It is strange, though, to hear such kind words from you, brother. You have to tell us all about what happened to you on the voyage…" His face broke into a smile. "But for now I'm just glad that you are back - how long will you be staying?"
Golbez's eyebrow rose once more. "As long as you let me."
For the second time that day, Cecil lost his voice.
