In this chapter, I wanted to try to get some different sides of Cloud. In the game, he was not only angsty and confused, he was also funny, irreverent, self-conscious, and had the perspective to laugh at himself ("whatever YOU want, Daddy!") as well as at others ("You look like a bear wearing a marshmallow.") Funny, faceted, confused Cloud is the character that won me over, so I wanted to try to get some of that in there along with the angst.

And again: not trying to whitewash Sephiroth. Nope, not at all, and not trying to turn him into a misguided good guy. Sephiroth is not a good guy; I think he is the guy who does whatever the hell he has to do to achieve his aim, and the Planet had better hope that his aim is to its good. To me, Sephiroth is all about will. Like Verbal said in The Usual Suspects, "the will to do what the other guy won't." This fic gets into the idea of a Sephiroth without ShinRa or Jenova to ruin his mind. So I think that, even if he's fighting for the Planet, he's going to do whatever he thinks needs doing. So there is that.


Avalanche

In the dim light, Cloud awoke to see a soft, dark shape that could only have been Tifa. Apparently he was in her bed. She looked to be leaning against the wall as she sat next to him. He guessed she was asleep, so he closed his eyes again and tried to keep still.

"Cloud?"

"Mm?" His mouth had the familiar taste of burnt dirt that always came after having been hit with status materia.

"You okay?"

"Mostly. You Sleep me?"

"Yeah."

"Thanks."

She shifted her weight to face him, and he sat up on the bed, drawing his knees up to his chest. His muscles ached and twitched. The Bitch had been using him hard. She didn't seem to care that most of his tissue was still human, even if it was enhanced. But now she was gone, and he could only assume that she was concentrating on Vincent.

"You call him?" he asked.

Pause. "Yeah."

"He said he'd come?"

"Yeah. He said to let him know when and where."

Tifa clearly wasn't happy with his plan. Cloud found that sad and a bit annoying, since she was only assuming that he had a plan. In truth, he hadn't given a moment's thought to what they would do when Vincent arrived. He had no idea what would happen to him or to Vincent when The Bitch decided to make her move. He had no idea what they would do about Sephiroth, but that was one thing that he knew he was going to have to figure out soon. Trouble was, without knowing what to expect of Sephiroth, he couldn't make any fair plans about that, either.

"Cloud, what if the Turks are lying?" Tifa asked.

Cloud bit back a bitter laugh. "The Turks are the least of our problems, Tifa."

"You may think so, but what if they're here to sabotage you?"

"For what, though, Tifa? To what end?"

He saw her put her face in her hands. She wanted so badly to believe that it was as easy as fighting the Turks again. "I don't know," she said. "It doesn't matter what the reason is. They just might."

Cloud took a deep breath. "It's just that, I mean, the real problem is...is Jenova." He waited for the reactionary jolt of her consciousness, but there wasn't one. This made him more nervous than anything: her lack of response made it seem as if she was making plans.

"I know that we haven't talked much about this," Cloud went on. "I mean, any of us. You know, in hindsight, I'm thinking that wasn't the right way to handle it. We all kind of just blocked it out. 'Okay, Sephiroth's gone, let's not think about him anymore.' So we didn't."

"Well, except in nightmares," Tifa said with a weak laugh.

"Well, yeah. But, I never really stopped thinking about it. Talking about what really happened to Sephiroth was like blaspheme, but maybe that wasn't fair."

"I know you think he was the victim sometimes, Cloud, but when he...when he..."

"He didn't kill Aerith, Tifa. We never talked about that, either."

"Yeah," she said, "but a clone didn't do this." She lifted her shirt up, and although he couldn't see it, he knew she was showing him the scar that ran from her chest to her hip. "A clone didn't kill my Dad."

"A clone didn't hand over the Black materia and attack Aerith either, Tifa. A clone didn't stand over Aerith, about to cut her in half while she prayed. A clone finally did do it, but I tried to first."

She pulled her shirt back down. He saw her fidget with her broken fingernails. "Yeah," she said. She took a breath, exhaled shakily. Cloud could tell that she was crying.

"Tifa," he went on, "if I can get her out of me...I mean, if I can fight her? Then I don't care who the hell helps me. So all I'm saying is that, if Sephiroth or the Turks or whoever, for whatever reason, are able to help us, then, you know, don't..."

"Don't screw it up by being hostile?"

"No, that's not what I was going to say." He thought it over, and then gently added, "But yeah, that, too."

Tifa laughed, a bitter sound that didn't suit her.

"What I mean is that we should, you know, use whatever we have. I don't care how we do it and I haven't even thought about what might come after we do it..."

"Have you even thought about how we're going to do this?" she asked.

All at once, Cloud resented her. "Right," he said, feeling defeated, feeling gloriously sorry for himself. "So, no pressure."

She sighed and rested her head back against the wall. "Sorry."

He grunted in reply.

"Look, I didn't mean to put it all on you, I just don't know what to expect."

"Well, neither do I. She's not exactly telling me what her plans are. She's not like, 'Oh, by the way, Cloud, I'll be killing you and Vincent and then everyone else and taking over the Planet, so if you're thinking about stopping me, you might want to make some plans.' You know?"

"Look, I'm sorry."

She sounded defensive, and that made Cloud want to give her something to be defensive about. That, in turn, made him angry, because he didn't want to feel that way towards Tifa. She deserved better. He was disappointed that she wasn't acting like a person who deserved better, but there it was. He tried to reign in his emotions before speaking again.

"All I'm saying is that we should wait till he gets here and then decide what to do. It's no use planning anything before we know anything. Right?"

"Yeah, I guess," she said. "I guess you're right."

"Unless you can think of something," he added, noting how good it felt to throw the responsibility back at someone else for a change.

"I can't, Cloud," she said. "I'm sorry it always falls to you. But you're the only one with a clue. It's not fair. I mean, to you. Well, to anyone, but really mostly to you."

"Well..." he said, uncomfortable now that she'd put his thoughts into her own words. He didn't have anything to say to that. To deny it would seem falsely heroic. To accept it seemed self-pitying.

The awkwardness was broken by a soft knock at the door. Cloud felt Tifa's sudden terror, as if she had been waiting to hear this all night. Cloud had the ridiculous feeling that Death was at the door, complete with a scythe and black, flowing robes.

"Who's there?" Tifa whispered.

"Reisei," came the answer.

Instead of sensing relief, Cloud felt further apprehension from Tifa. But it was with her usual confidenceif occasionally feignedthat she got off the bed and went to answer the door.

Tifa opened the door and peered out suspiciously. Cloud could see Reisei's eyes glowing from the hallway.

"Where were you?" Tifa asked. "We were looking for you; you're needed..."

"It was important. I need you to come outside, Tifa."

Cloud threw back the covers and started to get up.

"No," Reisei said, even though she hadn't seen Cloud. "Just Tifa for now, please. You in a moment."

Tifa looked over her shoulder at Cloud as if to ask him why Reisei would want to see her at this hour. Cloud shrugged. Tifa shrugged in response. "I'll be right back," she said.

Cloud nodded and watched her follow Reisei. If he had somehow guessed that the next time he saw Tifa she would be covered in blood, he would have run after her. Something tickled at the back of his mind, but he pushed the feeling aside and waited.


Tifa followed Reisei outside, her mind a tangle of imaginings, annoyances, resentment, and a deep fear beneath everything. The sun was about to rise, but for now it was still mostly dark and cold. She wished she'd brought a jacket, and she wanted to blame that on Reisei.

The woman walked in front of her, humming. Humming, of all things, a fact which annoyed Tifa more than she felt it should. Reisei hummed often, and it made Cloud smile. Reisei mumbled garbled (but oddly resonant and familiar) sounds and half-words in her sleep, and sometimes when she was awake, and this also made Cloud smile. Reisei tripped and giggled and played with her hair and grew flowers, and this made Cloud ecstatic. Tifa was only usually annoyed, not so much by Reisei herself (something about the weathered, wrinkled face halted that emotion in her,) but by everyone else's reaction to her. Reisei was kind and interesting, but she was just a clone, and so far, she hadn't done anything to help Cloud.

Tifa could see, just as everyone else could, how quickly Reisei had aged since she'd been with them. Marlene called her Gran, and tended flowers with her, as the old woman told her made up stories. Even Barret treated her with a gruff respect, as he had been taught to respect all his elders. Except that Reisei wasn't really an elder; in fact she was probably younger than Marlene. It was dangerous to like her too much. Tifa guessed that Reisei wouldn't be around for a long time, and she didn't think Cloud would take it too well when she finally passed on.

Provided Cloud is still with you, she thought mutinously. She immediately blocked that train of thought, as if her belief in him could keep him alive. Cloud would always be around.

It was cold and Tifa was still in her pajamas. She wrapped her arms over her chest and tried to cloak herself with her hair. What was Reisei thinking, calling her out here this early in the morning? She hoped to god that it wasn't to show her a flower or a star, or something pointless like that. Oh, Reisei was certainly one for calling people out in the middle of the night, saying it was urgent, and then showing them a particularly bright star, or the way a flower started to bloom just before dawn. It was ridiculous, and didn't this woman ever sleep, anyway?

"Rei?" Tifa said. Her voice, she noticed, sounded a lot nicer than her thoughts did. She hated the way Reisei could look wounded if someone was sharp with her. She hated that it affected her. It was much too familiar, and the tone of her own voice was much too familiar. "Rei, why are we out here?" she asked.

"To help Cloud and the others," Reisei answered.

Here Tifa expected her to go on: "Oh, wait till you see, this is so lovely!" or something like that, but she didn't. She kept walking.

Tifa ground her teeth and walked on. The chances of this being something that would really, truly help Cloud in the way he most needed help were very slim.

"I don't want you to be afraid," Reisei said, as she led Tifa to the fire in the center of town. "Promise me you won't be afraid, and that you'll trust me?"

"I promise," Tifa said absently. "As long as we can make this quick. I'm really cold." She moved closer to the fire to warm herself, and was startled when a stranger stepped out from the other side of it. Her hands clenched into fists and she stepped back for leverage, but these were automatic responses to being startled. The actual fearthe true, basic, animalistic terrorcame when she saw the silver hair.

If I scream, Cloud will come running, she thought, and her scream caught in her throat. She took two more steps back, balance and leverage forgotten. She couldn't fight him. She would have to run, lure him out of Cosmo Canyon, maybe buy herself and the others some time.

"Tifa," Reisei said, with just the barest touch on her arm.

Tifa jumped away from her with a shrill intake of breath, for a moment convinced that Sephiroth had gotten behind her somehow.

"Tifa, you promised not to be afraid."

She could hardly take her eyes off the man who was likely about to kill her, but at the same time, she wanted to glare at Reisei. She wanted to glare at her, and scream at her, and strike herthis idiot who had glibly handed her over to Sephiroth. She wondered fleetingly if Reisei was bad, and had been planning this the whole time. Maybe, Tifa thought with a surge of horror, she had come back different, bad, soulless or evil. Maybe she'd had all of them fooled.

Sephiroth was between her and the stairs that led out of the city. She could perhaps run behind the observatory if her legs would carry her quickly enough. Lead him to the cemetery. But, as Cloud would ask, to what end? Sephiroth would kill her and then come back for the others.

"Miss Lockheart," he said.

Tifa was so surprised to hear his voice that she gasped again. She hated the high-pitched, panic breathing she was doing, but the more she tried to stop, the more she did it. His voice sounded cool and businesslike. She supposed that killing her was just part of his business here. Maybe he would be quick about it. Or maybe she could still run.

"I understand you're afraid because of what happened," he said. Then he glanced at Reisei.

Reisei, Tifa saw out of the corner of her eye, smiled encouragingly at Sephiroth. Then she approached Tifa. Oddly, she didn't look as frail as she usually did. She looked confident in a way. In control.

"Tifa," she said. Her voice sounded strangely pragmatic. "I'll be so sorry if I have to cast Stop to get you to listen."

Finally, Tifa gave the old woman her attention. She stared, wide-eyed, terrified and outraged. How dare this woman threaten her. How dare she. "I'll kill you," Tifa breathed. "Somehow, I'll do it."

Reisei gave her that wounded look again, but this time, it only fueled Tifa's rage. She drew back her fist...

"Don't," Sephiroth said.

His voice again startled her so much that she fell back, crying, betrayed, and utterly afraid. She was shaking so hard that she almost fell, but the thought of going on her knees before either of them was repulsive, so she held herself up.

"I want you to be still and listen to me. And then, after you've listened, you can do as you please. You can stay or go. I'm not here to hurt you."

"Tifa, please, just listen to us, okay?" Reisei said.

"Us," Tifa thought. "Us," like they're a team. It made her want to vomit. Instead, she cried. She had occasionally been annoyed by Reisei, but she hadn't hated her. Had liked her in a strange way, in fact. This new hate for her felt alien and ugly.

Sephiroth approached her, and Tifa found that she couldn't run after all. All she could do was watch him come to her, and wonder what it was going to be like to die at his hand. Lonely, she decided. It would be lonely. She saw then that he had his sword dangling from his belt. It was long enough to drag on the ground. For a moment, Tifa stared at the line it had drawn in the sand behind him, a small cut on the surface of the Planet. The Masamune, she realized. She wondered madly, fleetingly, if her blood was still on it. If her father's blood was still on it.

She was sobbing, but Sephiroth seemed to ignore this. He was almost formal as he took both her handswhich were clutching her arms across her chestand pulled them away.

She had no idea what he meant by that. The gesture confused her. She was only certain of one thing: She hated him. And maybe she hated Reisei more.

He pulled her arms out to her sides. Tifa, too stunned to do anything but allow him, realized that he was going to finish what he'd begun sixteen years earlier. He was going to cross the old scar. Oh, Cloud would scream when he saw her.

With the same detached formality as before, Sephiroth took the hem of her pajama top and slowly lifted it up to the bottom of her ribs. There was nothing suggestive about it; he didn't see her as a female of the species, he was merely observing the affects of his work.

"I hate you," she said. She choked the words out between sobs, wishing that she didn't sound as desperate as she did. "I hate you," she said with more strength. If he was going to degrade her and kill her, at least she should tell him what she felt. "I hate you. I hate you. I hate you." She looked at his face as she said this, even though he wasn't looking at hers. She wanted to take her memory and hatred of him with her into the Lifestream. The Lifestream, she'd been told (by Reisei, no less,) would purge a person of all their grudges and resentment and hatred, but now Tifa didn't believe that. This was too strong to die.

Sephiroth drew his eyebrows together and touched the scar. It went from left to right in a perfect, diagonal line. His touch was very light, almost hesitant. He closed his eyes, sighed, and looked strangely pained.

"I hate you," Tifa repeated. It was her dying mantra, and she would say it until he bled her dry. "I hate you. I hate you."

"I know you do," he said. He pulled her top back down almost primly and turned away.

It didn't matter to him, obviously, that she hated him. But it mattered to her.

He drew the Masamune out of his belt. This action included a moment of reaching his arm as high as it would go before the sword had even cleared the belt, and Tifa was certain that he was going to bring it down on her. Suddenly she knew that she wasn't ready to die, and that telling him that she hated him wasn't enough. She hadn't said anything to anyone else. She hadn't had her final moments, and she was going to die out here, surrounded by her enemies. Frantically, she looked to the sky for her favorite constellation, the one she had looked at with Cloud at the well. Something familiar, so that her last vision in this life wouldn't be Sephiroth's cool eyes as he sliced her in half. The stars swam in her vision. She resisted the urge to shut her eyes.

The sound of metal on the ground made her look away from the sky briefly. But it was the image of Sephiroth on one knee, laying the Masamune at her feet, his head bowed over it, that made her forget the stars. His hands then went to his shirt and seemed to be toying with the top button.

Her first instinct, oddly enough, was to back away from the sword, and from him. Even under her shock and confusion, she could find no desire to pick it up and defend herself. Then she felt Reisei's hands on her arms, urging her forward again.

"Go on, my dear," the old woman whispered in her ear.


Cloud, come quickly.

Cloud...fire...

Cloud sat up in bed, certain that he hadn't dreamed that voice. He could usually tell when someone had gotten into his head and when he had dreamed that someone had. The only person who was able to do it was Reisei.

...is okay...the fire...

Everything is okay, come to the fire. At least, that's what he thought she was saying. Still, Reisei's idea of "okay" and his idea of "okay" were sometimes different. This could be one of her "come and watch the sky with me" moments, or it could be "help me carry this sick person with a broken leg to the inn." If no one was already dead or dying, Cloud thought it safe to take the time to be somewhat prepared.

He pulled his time-worn, spaghetti sauce-stained tee shirt over his head, took a green materia orb from Tifa's dresser drawer and snapped it into an old wrist-armor she'd found long ago. Then he snapped the armor onto his wrist. He almost went outside without his shoes, as he sometimes did when he was just going to look at the sky or something like that, but then he second guessed. Reisei had called him. He might end up climbing somewhere. He pulled his socks and shoes on, but didn't bother to tie them. As he got to the door, he realized that he should bring his jacket, too, since it was cold. But his jacket was all the way in his room, and...

Tseng...Reno...

Turks...fire...

Bring the Turks to the fire? She had to be kidding. Or he was hearing her wrong.

"You want me to bring the Turks?" he asked, whispering into the dark room.

He was filled with the answer "yes," as light and happy as her laugh. Her joy was like sugar in his veins and a knife in his heart all at once. Her joy felt the same as...

"...As it did the first time," he finished in a whisper. That was one thing that hadn't changed. She was mostly the same as she had been. But sometimes he wondered who else's DNA she might have in the mix.

Cloud drew the curtain back and peered outside. The sky was light in the east.

Quickly...

Right. Quickly. Get the Turks and convince them to come out to the fire quickly. Although, he had an idea that they might listen to him without question. Cloud grabbed the nearest thing he could find off a hook in Tifa's roomwhich looked to be a standard, Shildra Inn bathrobeand put it on. He headed out to the hall.

On the bottom floor, he found the Turks' room easily. Tifa had apparently posted a guard there again. He didn't marvel at her lack of trust, and sometimes he was glad for it. Sometimes she saw things he didn't see. This time, though, he didn't think she was.

The guard stepped aside for Cloud without question, but he was looking strangely at him. Cloud figured it could have something to do with his making a pre-dawn visit to these ShinRa people.

Remembering that he was supposed to be hurrying, he knocked on the door, and didn't bother to do so softly. He heard someone spring out of bed and come to the door.

"Who's there?" Reeve's hushed voice came through the door.

"Cloud. I need to see you."

Reeve opened the doorlooking paler than he had even earlierand stepped back to allow Cloud to come in, but Cloud hung back. "I need you guys down by the fire," Cloud said.

Reeve raised his eyebrows. "Sounds decadent. What do you have planned, sweetness?"

Cloud rolled his eyes. Reeve could be such an idiot. "Just come with me."

As expected, Reeve didn't question him. He left the door open as he went back inside to tell the other Turks. Cloud resisted the urge to look inside their hotel room to see what was going on, but he heard Elena ask sleepily, "What is it, Reeve?" and then, "Oh my god, he looks terrible." Cloud guessed she was talking about Tseng.

He thought that maybe Reisei had found a way to heal them all, although he doubted she could handle so many people at once. It would take her days to get everyone back on their feet.

Next he heard Rude: "Reno, come on, man." And Reno's reply, which was a faint groan. Rude asked Reeve if it could wait, and Reeve started to make his way back to Cloud.

Cloud tapped on the door, because he didn't want Reeve to be the go-between when it was easier just to talk to everyone. "Come in," Reeve said.

Cloud stepped into the room and took a look around. The table lamp was on, and everyone who was awake was squinting in the dim light. The room stank of illness and he wondered if anyone else could smell it. "Sorry, guys, but I need you all at the fire. It's not too long of a walk."

"What's this about? Reeve asked.

That was the question he'd been afraid of, yet he knew there was no way around it. Anything he told them was going to sound stupid and unreasonable, but he decided to word it as well as he could. "Uhh, we found our healer and she wants us to meet at the fire."

"Can't she come up here?" Elena asked.

"I guess not."

Elena looked at him a fraction of a second longer than she had to, and Cloud knew that she was looking for deceit. Then, oddly, she looked him up and down before shrugging and turning to look at the other Turks.

Reno made his way past her. "Hell, I'll go," he said. "I'll try anything. I'm sick of being sick."

"But why outside?" Elena asked.

"I don't know," Cloud said. "Maybe she has to do something outside because there are so many of you." Elena didn't look convinced. "Look, I'm unarmed..."

"Elena," Reeve said, "if Cloud wanted you dead, you would be dead. He wouldn't drag us all outside at such an ungodly hour to cut us in pieces."

"Thanks for the visual, Reeve," Cloud said.

"I do it all for you, sweetness," Reeve answered.

Reno chuckled as he pulled his shoes on. "So how do we get Tseng out there? Carry him?" he asked, before Cloud could ask Reeve what was up with the "sweetness" thing.

"I guess so," Elena said. But she needn't have, because Rude had already quietly gotten his shoes on, and was pulling his boss off the bed.

"Let's make this quick, then," Rude said. "Lead the way."

Cloud did, and they followed him outside. Reno snickered at something, and was perhaps going to make some kind of smartass comment, but stopped when he took a good look at Tseng. Cloud offered to help Rude with Tseng (who looked more dead than alive,) but Rude just shook his head and walked on.

They were halfway between the inn and the fire when Cloud heard Tifa crying. For that moment, he forgot everything else. The decision to run was not a conscious one. Oblivious to the Turks and Reeve running behind him, he ran towards Tifa.

There was blood on the ground. Cloud saw that first, and then looked at Tifa. She was standing, but that didn't mean she wasn't hurt. Frantically, he willed her to turn around as he ran to her. He could see Reisei standing close by, but Reisei seemed calm.

"Tifa!" Cloud called, as he closed the distance between them. "TIFA!"

She turned around, and Cloud felt his stomach bottom out when he saw that she was splattered in blood. "Cloud!" she wailed. She dropped something (that was a sword, why was she holding a sword, someone must have fought with her...) and staggered forward.

Cloud made it in time to catch her, and she wanted to cling and cry, but he pushed her away and held her at arms' length. He looked her up and down. There was so much blood, and he couldn't see where it was coming from. But now was not the time to panic. Panic, he'd learned, could cost lives.

"Tifa, shh," he said, and pushed her hair away to see if she had any cuts on her head, which could account for the blood on her face. But the blood wasn't running down her face; it was blood splatter, and he couldn't imagine what had happened. It seemed as if someone else's blood was on her.

"Tifa, are you okay? Just tell me yes or no. Are you hurt?"

She took a few hitching gasps as she shook her head.

"No, you're not hurt?"

"I'm not hurt," she said, and then went back to crying. There was a hysterical, screamy sound to her crying that tied his insides in a knot.

"Christ, Tifa, what happ-..."

His mouth dropped open in shock and he never finished the question. Somehow, somehow, in the midst of all this, he had expected this. He'd been prepared to see him, but he hadn't been prepared to see him directly after seeing Tifa covered in blood. This was all too familiar.

If he could have said anything, he probably would have screamed something stupid, like, "Now you die, bastard!" but as it was, all he could do was push Tifa aside, pick up the sword she had dropped, and step between her and Sephiroth. He raised the Masamune as if it was his old Buster Sword, prepared to finish this again if he had to.

Sephiroth took a step back and raised his empty hands. If that gesture hadn't stopped Cloud, his eyes would have. They were steady, (sane) and quiet. Cloud froze where he was.

The Turks and Reeve had caught up, but now they stood back, quiet and tense. Out of the corner of his eye, Cloud saw Reisei beckon the Turks closer, and he saw them begin to move. That was brave of them, but Sephiroth's eyes were only on him. At least, Cloud thought, there were a lot of people around. If anything happened, they at least stood a chance, however slight, and at least he had the sword; he had the Masamune...

The Masamune that cut Tifa and killed Aerith, had been through Aerith, had touched her insides and she had been impaled, and Sephiroth had smiled, had smiled... He had smiled and then he had drifted up, because he can fly and he is unbeatable and unstoppable and will crush the tiny Plant in his palm...

"Master yourself first, or you will never master your enemies..."

Cloud fleetingly remembered having been taught that.

"You will either be afraid or you will not, but don't bother struggling with it. Just remember what you know and carry out your orders."

Yes, he had been taught that in ShinRa; Sephiroth had taught him that, along with the others. Sephiroth was wise and strong, and now Cloud faced him, and he was afraid, and weak, and worst of all, letting the General down, and how would he ever defeat him if he couldn't even impress him?

Those thoughts were madness, and Cloud well knew it. But it was his weakness. Jenova was suddenly conspicuous in her absence.

Well, you're doing a good enough job failing on your own, he reminded himself.

Cloud took a shaky breath, relaxed his insanely tight grip on the hilt of the Masamune, and lowered the blade. He ran his free hand over his face, surprised to find how clammy he felt. He hadn't taken his eyes off of Sephiroth, but then, he hadn't really looked closely at him, either. Peripherally, he could see Tifa was still standing. She had stopped sobbing, and was as quiet as everyone else.

Cloud took a long look at Sephiroth. He had a black cloak pulled tightly around him, and he was holding it closed with one hand. His features were the same as he remembered them, but he was different in ways Cloud couldn't see, but feel. Always he had felt a connection to the General, some invisible cord that seemed to bounce moods and occasionally thoughts back and forth between them, and now it was gone. They seemed to be free of it.

No, Cloud thought, and almost dropped the sword when this occurred to him, he's free of it. You still have your end.

Cloud had to look away. And anyway, he thought it was probably a good time to look at everyone else.

Reisei had said something to Rude, and he had put Tseng down on the ground. They were closer to Sephiroth and Cloud than they had been moments ago, and theyespecially Reeve, who had witnessed the final battle with himlooked both awed and terrified. Tifa was clutching her arms over her chest and shivering.

"Sephiroth?" Reisei said softly.

Sephiroth nodded. Reisei stepped between him and Cloud, and put her small, wrinkled palm on the blade of the Masamune, urging Cloud to keep it lowered. She smiled at him,

("...and let me handle Sephiroth..." her quiet voice in his head, but this wasn't from now, this was from the first time...)

so that he was distracted enough not to react when Sephiroth raised his arms to the sky, looking for all the world as if he were about to summon something. The front of his white shirt was torn and soaked through with blood.

Cloud heard the others gasp, but something told him not to move. He felt the familiar pull of energy in the air around him. It seemed to rush past him and towards Sephiroth, who was gathering it into himself.

At first he thought that the wetness on his face was from tears, and he was surprised, and wondered when he had started crying without realizing it, and more importantly, why. Then he saw the water hit the ground, and in a moment, he could see a highly reflective puddle of rainwater at his feet. Cloud saw an outstretched, feathered wing for a moment in that reflection, and he quickly shut his eyes, because he didn't want to see anymore. The rain continued to cool his overheated skin, and at the same time, warm him where he was cold.

It was over quickly, and everyone was silent. After a moment, he heard Tifa sob again. Behind him, Tseng sat up. Cloud could hear the Turks whispering something to Tseng, but he didn't have time to think about what they were saying.

Finally, he opened his eyes.

Sephiroth was pulling his coat closed again. Reisei linked both her arms through Cloud's left arm. The Masamune dangled from his limp hand.

"You knew I'd tried it, Cloud," Reisei whispered in his ear, "but it wasn't me."

Yes, he had known that the Great Gospel wasn't for Reisei, as much as he'd wanted it to be. Her essence might be the same, but her genetic makeup wasn't, and that probably had something to do with it. Cloud had been all right with Reisei not being able to use it.

"But Sephiroth," he whispered.

"Yes!" she said, sounding oddly cheerful as she nodded vigorously. "I knew it would work! And now everyone's so much better." She let go of his arm and stepped back.

Yes, everyone was much better. Andmore to the point, he thoughtno one would be able to harm each other for a short time.

But only for a short time, and Cloud knew it. It made him angry and panicked in a way, and yet he could still access another, more reasonable part of him, and this told him to use it while he could. How he handled this could cure or kill so much.

Everything else could wait.

"Reeve," he said, trying to use his best Cloud Is In Control Of The Situation voice, "take the Turks back to the Inn. Reisei, take Tifa..."

"Cloud," Tifa said. She was using her best I Am Determined voice, but it was shaky and wet.

He picked up the Masamune, turned to her, and bent his head to her hair. He hoped for the familiar smell of rosemary shampoo, but the blood and fear on her smothered it. "He can't hurt me and I can't hurt him," he whispered. "And if he'd wanted to, we'd all be dead."

"I won't leave you here; I have to know what's going on!" she said. She was trying to yell at him, but he silenced her by taking a step back. He didn't need hysterics when he was so close to having some of his own.

"Just go, and I promise I'll come back." He knew that wouldn't be enough, and he felt for her. He understood her need to see him through this, and he knew that there was no way he would ever leave her alone with Sephiroth, but he couldn't think of a way to make it easier for her. "Just do as I ask," he said.

"I refuse..."

"I don't have time to argue about it," Cloud said as gently as he could, "and I don't want to waste any more time. The quicker you go, the more safe time we'll have."

"Tifa," Reisei said. She was holding her hand out tentatively.

For reasons Cloud didn't understand, Tifa looked horrified at the idea of taking the old woman's hand, even though she had never had a problem with her in the past.

She thought Reisei set us up, Cloud thought in a moment of intuition, and his intuition on things like this was never wrong. ("You're such a woman sometimes, Cloud," he heard Tifa tease, like she sometimes did.)

"Go on," he said, and gave her a gentle nudge towards Reisei.

Tifa went, but she didn't take Reisei's hand.

Cloud didn't have the time to watch her leave. He turned to Sephiroth.


Cloud and Sephiroth

He had the insane urge to sit down next to Sephiroth. Instead, he did what would have made Tifa proud: he gripped the Masamune and moved to Sephiroth's side, so that he could circle him if he had to. He had no doubt that Sephiroth had abilities without his sword, but the least he could do was be prepared.

Sephiroth turned his head to look at Cloud, and Cloud stopped walking. To have kept walking and force Sephiroth to turn around to see him, or to put himself at Sephiroth's back, would have been unnecessarily rude, and Cloud didn't see any reason to antagonize him. He kept his face as impassive as possible.

"Cloud Strife," Sephiroth said.

Cloud nodded.

Sephiroth looked him up and down, assessing him coolly. Cloud resisted the urge to self-consciously try to flatten his hair.

"Yes," Sephiroth said. "They told me I would remember you when I saw you. Of course I remembered you, but not quite what you looked like. But now I do." The barest hint of a smile. "You grew."

Cloud shrugged. "Topped at five nine," he said.

"Did you ever make it to SOLDIER?"

Cloud was suddenly nervous and ashamed. He would have to admit now that he never had. He couldn't begin to grasp why it still mattered to him, and he wanted to tell Sephiroth that. He wanted to just tell him straight out that SOLDIER didn't matter, and ShinRa was evil and stupid and weak and had fallen, and that he, Cloud, was still alive. Instead of doing that, he decided to deflect the question.

"You don't remember?" he asked.

Sephiroth sighed. "As I have told Reeve, the last thing I remember is..." Something seemed to dawn on him then, and he turned fully to Cloud, a strange light in his eyes. "The last thing I remember is you, in fact."

Cloud felt a ridiculous, yet irresistible surge of pride, even though he wasn't entirely certain what Sephiroth was talking about. He wanted to ask, "How much do you remember about me?" but aside from the fact that he was afraid of what the answer might be, he knew this was not the time. Instead he asked, "Exactly what do you remember?"

Sephiroth turned to face him and looked at him levelly. "Nibelheim. The reactor, the fire, Zack, Miss Lockheart, Jenova, and yourself." He waited for an answer, but, seeing that Cloud didn't seem to have one, he went on. "You threw me into the Lifestream. That's the last thing I remember."

Cloud nodded, suddenly nervous. "I did what I had to do," he said. He immediately hated the way it had sounded, as if he was some kind of hero, some kind of powerful person. He expected Sephiroth to give him a withering look, to tell this weak, mouthy sixteen year old boy to settle down.

"You did," Sephiroth said. "I owe you my thanks."

Of all the things Cloud had been expecting, to be thanked was not one of them. He stood in front of Sephiroth, looking, he suspected, entirely nonplussed, and probably quite stupid as well. "Your...thanks?" he said, with a mental slap to himself for sounding as stupid as he looked and completing the image.

"Strife," Sephiroth said, as if exasperated that he had to explain this, "I had given myself to Jenova. I was her instrument. I gave her my body, my willwhat little of it I hadand my mind. My mind, Strife. How much more useless could a creature be? How much more pathetic? Could anything be more lowering to one's pride than to give in like that? To become someone's object?"

Cloud frowned through this, and blinked as he sorted it out. "You're glad I killed you because serving her was lowering to your pride?" He asked because at first it had sounded strange to him, but when he said the words aloud, it sounded more absurd than just strange, and he found himself becoming hesitantly angry. "Your pride? What about..." (Tifa Mom Aerith Nibelheim the Planet...) "What about everything else?"

Sephiroth gave him a cold look. "I know there was more to it, Strife, but I remember very little. Yes, you avenged many people by killing me, and certainly you saved many more people from what I would have doubtless continued to do. But I can't thank you for them; the ones you've helped, they can thank you. I'm thanking you for having saved me."

While Cloud stared at him, open-mouthed and trying to process all of this, Sephiroth glanced briefly to the Shildra behind Cloud, and then he sat down on the damp ground. Cloud looked up, too, and saw Tifa standing on one of the balconies, watching from a distance. He was briefly alarmed that Sephiroth still knew how to manipulate people's feelings with his actions, but then he sat down, too. He supposed that eliciting a desired response was ingrained in people. Sephiroth wanted Tifa to see that he wasn't a threat, so he'd sat down. Cloud wanted her to see that he was in no danger, so he followed suit. Then he turned his attention back to Sephiroth.

"So, is that why you're here, then?" he asked. "To 'save' me?"

Sephiroth was to his side, watching him carefully. "Strife," he said, "if there is a reason that I've been brought back, I have no idea what it is."

"I see," Cloud said. In truth, though, he didn't understand any of this. He had hoped for years that someone would find a way to fight the being that was inside him, but had feared that it would kill him in the process. The news of Sephiroth's return had hinted in his mind at both of those options. He remembered what The Bitch had been trying to do to his body the day before, as he battled her in his own mind. He remembered Sephiroth's wings, ten years ago when he had finally killed him. He was still reeling from once again seeing Tifa covered in blood and Sephiroth right after, and still reeling from having seen the Great Gospel cast by the same man. He hated and feared one image of Sephiroth, and was completely thrown by this new one. And through it all he continued to fight the urge to try to impress him, as if the eager adolescent in him still had something to prove.

As they were talking, the effects of the Great Gospel had worn off, and now both of them were capable of being hurt again.

Cloud was surprised he could function enough to even speak.

"I never knew what she was," Sephiroth said slowly. "I never guessed that something was inside of me, not until I saw it. I never knew, so I thought it was me, my intuition if you will, and so of course I followed it blindly. I wonder if I would have fought her if I'd known sooner. I knew I had a kind of connection with you, Strife, but I had no idea that we both had her inside of us."

Just as Sephiroth finished speaking, Cloud felt a slight buzz of her attention on him. It shocked him, because she had been so quiet for so long. He imagined that wherever Vincent was, he had just felt her focus slip. He wondered how Vincent was faring. He supposed that Cid would go and get him and bring him here

(for the reunion the reunion...reunion...)

Cloud caught his breath, and Sephiroth looked at him, frowning.

"Have you been fighting her all these years?" he asked.

Cloud swallowed against the bitterness in his throat. He nodded. "Not so much at first, but since she regained her strength. In the last few years she's gotten..." Cloud found he was afraid to tell Sephiroth that she'd gotten strong. That was too much like admitting that he himself was weak.

"Jenova tells you to do things. I know. She changes you. I used to think I was...was some sort of low form of a god, you know."

She seemed to react to the sound of her name, though she was still busy somewhere else. Planning. He felt the jolt of her joy, and the brief, static-white burst of her energy.

"Stop," he whispered to Sephiroth. "Let's just not use her name for now."

Looking slightly surprised, Sephiroth conceded with a nod. "She uses your emotions," he went on. "If you are afraid, she gives you false hope. If you're angry, she finds a way to harness it. If you love, she exploits. I, of course, thought this was all me, and that it was because I was somehow above all the others."

Cloud looked at Sephiroth, stunned. He was overwhelmingly relieved to have someone else put it in words for him, and overwhelmingly unnerved that it was the man he'd killed for having lost to her. He wanted to tell Sephiroth that he was right, that she had kept him separated from everything for years. He wanted to tell him about how difficult it had been to keep his reactions low and quiet over the years, about how sex had been out of the question because she was so unpredictable, about how she laughed at his human desires and made the barest of touches painful. He wanted to tell this to someone who already knew, but he couldn't say it to Sephiroth.

"I'm not making excuses," Sephiroth said. "After all, you haven't let her win yet."

The word "yet" hung between them. Cloud no longer wanted to look at Sephiroth, nor did he want to be looked at with that terrible, cold understanding. Instead he glanced at the Shildra. Tifa was still watching them anxiously from the balcony. Should The Bitch come back, he was going to want Tifa to cast Sleep on him again, and yet, if The Bitch decided it was time to use her full power on him, he doubted that Tifa would be able to stop her. He also doubted that Tifa would take it very well if Sephiroth was forced to use materia on him. Also, he wasn't sure he would be ready to let Sephiroth cast anything on him. And underneath all of that, he didn't want this man to witness him losing control.

"Where did you get my sword?" Sephiroth asked.

With a surge of panic and guilt, Cloud nearly handed the Masamune over to him, feeling for that moment as if he had been caught with something he wasn't supposed to have. He always felt a little guilty holding the Masamune, as if someone would come charging in and demand that he put it down. He stopped himself before he made any distinct moves with it.

"Uhh, after everything was over, I found it. I don't remember taking it," he added hurriedly. Then he regretted saying that. The words "I don't remember" were such uncomfortable words for him. "I never used it," he said.

"Of course not."

Cloud was sure that Sephiroth would demand it back, or simply take it out of his hand, but he didn't, and Cloud was relieved. He knew that the right thing to do would be to keep it, or at least try to keep it for now, and he had no idea how Sephiroththis Sephirothwould take to being denied his possessions, especially the Masamune. And especially by Cloud.

But Sephiroth didn't demand it back. "I owe you my freedom, Strife," he said. "So if there is a way for me to help you by fighting her, I will. I can think of no other reason, outside of chance, for my return. I believe in chance, but I believe more strongly that my return has to do with the Ancient."

Cloud's head whipped around so quickly to face Sephiroth that he heard his neck crack. "Aerith?" he asked.

"The old woman," Sephiroth said.


Avalanche

Cloud returned to the Shildra alone. Sephiroth thought it best to wait outside, because he expected there would be a scene if he walked into the Inn. Cloud thought he was right. It was better for Cloud to go in alone and tell everyone what he knew (which wasn't much, he admitted to himself,) and then decide where to go and what to do from there.

Tifa met him on the steps and put her arm very carefully around his back. Even with his robe separating her skin from his, she didn't actually rest her arm around his waist. She was still covered in Sephiroth's blood, and she was fighting not to cry again.

"I'm all right," Cloud said. "I'm all right. We need to talk."

"What the hell!" came Barret's voice from the door behind Tifa. "What the HELL! Sephiroth! Sephiroth is here? Bring him!"

"Barret..." Cloud began. His head had started to ache.

"BRING HIM, Strife, I been waitin' years, 'cause I knew he was too evil to really be dead!"

"Barret, please!" Cloud said, now yelling himself. "Stop shouting!"

He noticed that Cid, Reeve, and the Turksall but Tsengwere waiting behind Barret in the lobby of the Shildra. They were all staring at him. Tifa looked up at him, surprised that he had yelled at Barret. Cloud knew that she wasn't used to him yelling. It was dangerous for him to raise his voice and he rarely did it, but suddenly he felt the need to. Suddenly, even though his head was pounding, it felt very necessary to yell. Not only necessary, but freeing. The Bitch wasn't around to use his feelings, to fuel or siphon his rage, and for once...for once in these many years, he wanted to run with this feeling, and to let it run with him. Cloud was angry, and at the same time, joyful that he was able to express this without feeling her approval...her encouragement.

"Now that I have everyone's undivided goddamn attention, you're all going to listen to me!" he went on, his voice rising in volume the more he thought about what he wanted to say. "Anyone not interested in listening to me can turn around and walk right the fuck out that door! There will be no yelling! There will be no fighting! We're going to deal with this reasonably, and anyone who wants to be unreasonable can also turn around and walk right the fuck out of that door! Because I refuse to listen to bullshit about vengeance and violence. Are we all clear on that!"

The room rang out with silence as they all stared at him. Tifa's hand had slackened on his waist, and her other hand had crept to her chest, and she held it there, surprised by his outburst.

Cloud felt drained, unsteady, and unlike himself for having lost his temper, but he also felt somewhat relaxed and relieved. He didn't know how to follow up, and yet he was still sure of what he had actually said. Yes, he had been angry, but he reckoned that he'd made some kind of sense.

He took a breath and cleared his throat. "So," he said in his usual, quiet tone, "are we clear on that?"

Barret, one eyebrow raised, was looking at Cloud appraisingly. His look suggested that he was surprised, and perhaps even pleased, that Cloud still had some fire in him. This made Cloud feel slightly ashamed; did everyone think that he had no passion, only because he was never allowed to let it surface?

Barret nodded in response to Cloud's question. That was good. At least he was willing to listen.

Reeve had begun to smile. Cid outright cackled. It was Reno who finally spoke up.

"I liked the part about 'violence and vengeance' the best," he said. "Did you make that up yourself, or did you hear it in a movie? I'll have to remember that one."

"Shut up, Reno," Cloud said.

"Whatever you say, sweetness," Reno answered.

Cloud had forgotten about Reeve calling him that earlier, at a time that seemed so far away now. He threw his free hand out in frustration. "What the hell?" he asked, sounding to himself alarmingly like Barret.

Tifa pulled away and looked at him. Her eyes were tired and red-rimmed. She put her hand to her mouth and giggled. "Oh, Cloud," she said. Just as suddenly as she'd begun to laugh, tears came into her eyes. She laughed through them, and reached out to touch his robe. He'd forgotten he'd been wearing the stupid thing.

Cloud looked down and realized that he hadn't, in fact, grabbed a Shildra Inn robe off the peg in Tifa's room. Instead, he had grabbed Tifa's robe, which was pink, and read "50 Sweetness" on the front, and "100 Attitude" on the back.

With horror, he realized that he had worn this thing during his entire talk with Sephiroth.

Tifa was still laughing, and Cloud felt a smile begin to tug at the corners of his lips, but he fought it. He was still too mad to not be mad anymore, and anyway, he wasn't ready to give it up yet. He hurriedly pulled the robe closed.

"Well then," he said. "Everyone get cleaned up. Meet me again down here in twenty minutes."

He strode past everyone purposefully, making sure that he was stomping his feet as he walked by. Reeve laughed good naturedly, and so did a few others. Tifa followed Cloud, and she was still giggling.

Cloud thought this was all to the good. They were tired and afraid, but laughing and sane. Tifa was covered in the blood of the resurrected man who had nearly killed her years ago, but was not so undone that she had lost herself.

If they could all stay rational, Cloud thought, if they could all put the past aside even for a short time, then they stood a chance against Jenova. For the first time in ten years, he was sure of it.