PROLOGUE

Mini Mia: "So Isaac, what did you get for me this year?"

Mini Isaac: "I... er... um..." (whispers to Cynic) "Help me!"

Lord Cynic: "Sorry mate, I'm a writer, not a delivery boy."

Shrek: "I'm a delivery boy!"

Lord Cynic: (pushes Shrek out of the picture) "Okay, that's enough out of you."

Mini Isaac: (to Mia): "I can't tell you what it is... it has to be a secret."

Mini Mia: "Aww, okay."

Mini Isaac: "Phew..."

Lord Cynic: "You were lucky this time, mate."

Mini Isaac: "Shush."


Lord Cynic: "I don't own Golden Sun. I don't own a Bronze Moon. I don't own a Copper... something. Whatever, I own none of those, even though only one is actually something useful."


Chapter 11: Vale's Cupids are back in action

Even Isaac was aghast by the words he had blurted in frustration. Outside, even the wind was whispering through the air, like it had been eavesdropping and was too caught off-guard by Isaac's declaration.

On the other side of the glass, the voice that had been speaking to Isaac was not expecting so blunt a declaration. It had dropped whatever sarcasm it still possessed and was now muttering silently to itself. However, despite the horror that followed what he'd said, Isaac could swear he almost heard two voices behind that glass, two voices that sounded mighty familiar...

Eventually, the voice decided to speak up.

"This is very unexpected news," it said, and Isaac thought he heard a short gasp of breath from behind the glass. "Are you quite sure you feel this way?"

"I... I don't know," Isaac stuttered, starting to break up. "I mean it just seems so soon to think about getting married. I'm only 19-ish, you'd think I have plenty of time to don the tuxedo and raise ki... oh boy..."

"I don't quite understand," the voice said, expression concern for perhaps the first time in 15 minutes. "I thought you loved this girl and would do anything for her. Why the sudden cold feet?"

"I don't know," Isaac repeated. He was getting majorly freaked. Why wasn't he keen to marry Mia? He loved her, she loved him, there should be nothing stopping them. And yet... he still didn't feel right. No, he wasn't cheating on her. Granted, this was the first chance they had to be apart for probably 52 hours now. Other than that, Mia couldn't detach herself from him if she tried. He probably could, but he didn't want to.

Switching back to reality, Isaac realised the voice behind the glass was still requesting a proper response. Resigning himself to further inner self-destruction, he took a deep breath and prepared to give an answer. However, he tried speaking the words quietly to himself, but no sound came out. It was like he'd lost the ability to speak, as punishment from Venus for betraying his beloved Mia. But he hadn't done anything despicable. He couldn't marry her just yet, sure, but he wasn't being unfaithful. So why couldn't he voice anything aloud?

An abrupt shaking of the confession cabinet brought Isaac back into reality once again. He shot up in shock, and then peaked outside to find Garet and Jenna still running endlessly through the streets of Vale. Raising an eyebrow, he stepped out of the cabinet to watch them, until Mia collided into the back of him.

"Whoa!"

"Ooof!"

Both landed heavily on the floor, in a rather comprising position for not the first time. They excused themselves hastily and stood up, blushing heavily despite the fact that they were already a couple. I guess it could be because it was in public... dirty puppies.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't see you!" Mia apologised, over and over again. Her cheeks were still flushed and she hasn't noticed her daily robes were also rather flustered.

Isaac was stammering his own apologises so each couldn't hear whatever the other was saying. He seemed to have forgotten what had happened in the confession cabinet just a minute ago as he became flustered. However, Mia's engagement ring suddenly sparkled in the sunlight, and he suddenly became very pale.

Mia became very anxious by the sudden alteration in Isaac's complexion and looked at him with the deepest concern. She asked him what was wrong, but he refused to tell her, because he knew it would upset her and maybe even cause her to hate him forever. She continued to press on for an explanation, but every time he shook her head and told her everything was fine.

Eventually, he yelled out that there was nothing wrong, and Mia's lip started to tremble. Isaac immediately became very guilty at his angered outburst and drew Mia into a heartfelt hug. He whispered apologies to her, telling her he was just under a lot of stress as he stroked her hair tenderly. She mumbled quietly that she'd been asking Dora questions about her and his face suddenly became paler than even Mia's.

"Y-Y-Y-You've what?" he stammered, his expression half-frozen in a mix of shock and horror. It was like the time during the babysitting chaos when he discovered he was outside his own house in his Djinni pyjamas, under the intrigued (for the most part) eyes of every one of his friends. Despite herself, Mia had to muffle a giggle and wondered if she'd said that with the intentional purpose to get that reaction from her fiancé.

"You don't mind, do you?" she asked, using the situation to her advantage. She tilted her head and gazed up at him smiling sweetly (#2 of her powers of seduction), waiting for an answer. Isaac's face flushed furiously and he struggled to string two coherent words together as he fumbled around for an answer. Eventually, due to his inability to speak English (or human for that matter), he nodded silently, still unable to pull his own gaze from Mia's blue eyes.

As if on cue, a shrill shriek broke the land of imaginary paradise the lovebirds were in (although they might say otherwise), and their attentions switched to the ever-vigilant Jenna and the ever-desperate Garet. Isaac and Mia sweatdropped exasperatedly, wondering what they were ever going to do with the eternal bickerers.

Just then, a lightbulb switched on in Isaac's mind.

"Oooh, what a pretty light!" Mia cooed, staring dreamily at the light prop above Isaac's head. Her eyes were filled with stars and she had that sort of anime look of wonder.

Isaac fell down in stupidity at Mia's reaction, but quickly collected himself.

"Follow my lead," he whispered to Mia, who had swung out of Dreamland and back into reality.

"Wheeeeee!!"

Out of nowhere, a large pink fluffball flew through the air, using its rather short arms. It looked like an inflated pink beachball with eyes.

"HIIIIII!" it yelled from the sky to the people down below. Onlookers watched on in amusement, but even more watched bemused as a teenage boy with messy black hair ran agitatedly through the street. His sunglasses were perched precariously on his head, and his blue vest was almost stuck to his body as he continued to pursue the flying pink puffball.

"Get back here with my GameBoy, Kirby!" he screamed between pants. "I swear, you'll be cooking on the fireplace if I don't get it back!"

"You'll have to come up here and get it, Cynic!" Kirby taunted from the sky. Using his strange abilities, he started to rise even further into the clouds.

Seething with frustration, "Cynic" jumped into the nearby tree and continued his pursuit upwards through the branches. Isaac and Mia watched, humungaloid sweatdrops sliding down the back of their heads. Eventually, Isaac remembered his priorities and stuck a leg out onto the footpath.

"What are you doing?" Mia asked, confused. Isaac gave her a pointed glance and she nodded, even though she had no idea what he was up to.

Right on delayed cue (or maybe they were frozen in time because of Cynic and Kirby ... never mind), Garet and Jenna came back from their 39th cycle through Vale. Garet was still able to keep a couple of seconds in front of Jenna, and the Isaac only hoped it would stay that way.

Thankfully for the blonde teenager, Garet didn't look like stopping - until he was inches from Isaac's outstretched foot.

"Ah, stuff it," Isaac said finally, and hauled Garet into the bushes he and Mia were hiding in. Despite the redhead struggling, Isaac dragged him away, after indicating to Mia to do the same when Jenna came by.

Sure enough, when Jenna came into reach, Mia grabbed her and applied the chloroform Isaac had given her (Lord knows how he got it... oh, I am a Lord... yeah, so I know... sorry) to the brunette. Soon, like Garet, Jenna was dozing peacefully.

"What do we do now?" Mia asked, since she still had no clue what Isaac was scheming.

"Elementary, my dear Mia," Isaac said, wearing a monocle and puffing a pipe. "We take them to separate houses first. You can go to my house; I'll go to Garet's and hope no one's there. When we get inside, we'll launch Operation Mars Matchmaking."

"Ooh!" Mia cooed, her eyes becoming stars again. "I almost forgot about that. Vale's Cupids, reporting for duty!"

Isaac smiled at her enthusiasm, but when Garet stirred he stuffed the cloth of chloroform in the redhead's mouth. If not killing him, it certainly sent him to sleep. Isaac raised an eyebrow at Mia, and then the two heaved their 'projects' away to their separate destinations.


As the teenagers departed from the scene, the confession cabinet grew silent and neglected. A few people stared wide-eyed at the strange structure planted on the side of the footpath, but none stayed around to investigate it. Eventually, quiet voices spoke from inside the cabinet.

"That was unexpected," a male voice said. "Isaac not wanting to marry Mia? It's like the world's flipped 180 degrees off the face of the universe. Next thing we know, Garet'll turn into a Kraden wannabe."

"There's no way in hell we can let that happen!" a female voice said through gritted teeth. "We must marry those two of or I'll never win my be- er, that is, otherwise they'll never get it through their oblivious heads that they were meant for each other."

There was a slight pause, almost as if the male voice (which sounded quite young, as did the female voice) was trying to figure out what the female voice had said.

Eventually, there was a shrill female cry, and the cabinet exploded into a wind of wood and glass. As the dust settled, two blonde teenagers stood where the confession cabinet used to be. The boy had his arms folded across his chest in a business-like manner, while the girl was looking disgruntled, her eyes beady and searching the environment for something. She glared at people who dared to give her a side-glance, and the boy laughed nervously.

"I guess you're really focussed about getting Isaac and Mia together, huh?" he asked, half guessing what her answer would be.

"You've got that right!" the girl said, shooting random people death glares. "I am not letting those two muck it up! It's been too long!"

"It's been 2 weeks since they got together," the boy said, his eyes turning into slits.

"That's long enough!" the girl spat, shooting her companion in cunnery (my own word, get yers by yourself) a damaging glare. He winced and felt himself shrink a few inches (as if he wasn't short enough).

"O-Okay then," he stammered timidly. "What do you propose we do?"

"I'll leave that to you to decide," the girl said, looking at her watch. "I've got somewhere to be, so you'll have to figure out what to do. Later, Ivan, and don't mess this up, or you'll regret it."

"B-But -" However, the girl had disappeared into the bushes and out of sight. Ivan sighed and sat on the rubble resulting from the explosion. "Man, why do I have to do all the dirty work? Dang that Sheba, she always finds a way to do this to me... IT'S NOT FAIR!!!"


"Man, this really HURTS," Felix whined, hunched over and waddling thanks to the delayed reaction to the wedgie he'd been given. After a final glare-off between him and Piers, they had departed on their separate ways. However, the Venus Adept with the ponytail had unsuccessfully attempted to readjust his underwear, so while he walked he yelped every few steps. Still, he was not going to ask anyone for help, that'd just be embarrassing. The bemused stares he received as he stumbled through the plaza were already enough publicity than he could handle, so asking for assistance was definitely out of the question.

He was just about to pass the travel agency, and past the humiliating spectacle of the true Lemurian when he heard a familiar face.

"Come one, come all to "Worldly Weyard! As a well-travelled individual, I have adventured to all parts of Weyard, from Prox, to Daila, to even the Treasure Isle that was rumoured to be empty! How can you not deny what you've just heard? Well, if you travel by our company, you too can begin your own adventure!"

"You have GOT to be kidding me," Felix said, and he spun around to face the talking rubber Weyard. "Piers? Is that you?"

"H-Huh?" Piers froze in mid-speech. "F-Felix! What are you doing here?!"


Mini Isaac: "Can't you help me, Cynic?"

Lord Cynic: "Why should I?"

Mini Isaac: "Mia will kill me if she doesn't find a present from me under the tree for Christmas."

Lord Cynic: "Hmm... I think I've got it!" (whispers to Mini Isaac, whose eyes widen)

Mini Isaac: "You can't be serious!"

Lord Cynic: "'fraid so, little man. Get to it!"

Mini Isaac: (groans)


Lord Cynic: "A different kind of cliff-hanger this time. See? I told you I could get this done in 5 days or less... but sorry it only featured like 3 separate scenes. I counted the words of the first scene, and it was well over 1400 words. Nifty. I hope I didn't scare any Mudshippers over what happened last time. This is a humour fanfic, so in a roundabout way it's gonna have a happy ending like it should. Okay, just gonna do the Reader's Spotlight then I'm outta here. Oh, and I'm about 300 words into my Pokemon Christmas fanfic... yayness."


Reader's Spotlight

"Link015"

Ah, but you forgot what I said before: 5 days or less or I'd let anyone kick the crap out of me. Sorry the Djinni aren't in this one, I haven't found a good way to continue their antics. Thanks for the compliments.

"iain r m"

Wow, you're a loud one. Don't worry, I'll make Mudshippers proud of me... eventually. As for Felix/Sheba, I haven't decided which pairing to give Sheba... we'll have to see what happens.

"Pant Burner"

Aww, I was hoping no one would figure that out before I could reveal it. Now the story's ruined!!! Kidding, but congrats on finding out who they were.