TO LOVE A SITH

Chapter Twenty-One

Anakin shut his eyes tightly and exhaled. It was only a matter of time now. Soon, his life would be over. He prayed that Padme and their children would be alright. He just wished that he had had more time with them. He felt like he had barely gotten to spend time with his newborn children and his wife…he needed to be with her now more than ever.

After the rebel soldiers had taken him captive, it seemed like it had been one transport after another. Too much moving around when all he wanted to do was sit down and pray for his family. He knew he didn't have much time left to do that. It was time for him to pay for his transgressions and he knew it.

A rebel soldier entered his room and Anakin looked at him with annoyance for interrupting his thoughts.

"Come this way, Vader."

Anakin quickly rose from his seat and followed the soldier. After what seemed like hours, they finally reached the communications room. He quickly took his seat and looked around, realizing that he was on the rebel base and the room he was in was not a communications room at all. It was extremely large and had several stories that reminded him of what used to be the Senate meeting room. This was it. His trial was about to begin. It was the beginning of the end of his life.

He gazed at the faces that surrounded him in the several stories of the room. He saw Yoda and felt a wave of relief wash over him. A part of him had always hoped that Yoda was still alive. Then his eyes fell on Obi-Wan and despite everything that had happened between them, he was still glad to see him there.

Almost immediately after, his eyes locked with the soft brown ones of his wife. His heart leapt at the sight of her and a soft smile crept to his face. He had been so worried about her that he had allowed himself to forget the image of her beautiful face. He could almost curse himself for that, but he had done it on purpose. Her beautiful image would have made it that much harder to focus, to not feel sorry for himself. His heart soared when she returned his smile and he could see tears glistening in her eyes. Through his eyes, he tried desperately to tell her that everything was going to be fine, that she had to be strong, that he was sorry for everything he had done to her.

His thoughts were interrupted by the beginning of his trial. A strange looking creature appeared to be presiding over his trial and Anakin took a deep breath. He listened with a pained expression as the accounts of his transgressions were retold before the entire court. Every moment his eyes lifted to where Padme sat. She smiled reassuring at him each time, but he could tell that the trial was much more difficult on her than it was on him. When she thought he wasn't looking, he could see her lips tremble so badly that she had to bite them to stop her shaking. Oh, Padme…I'm so sorry. All of this is my fault…

"Lord Vader, would you like to speak on your own behalf?"

Anakin nodded quickly and stood up, knowing that no matter what he said, his fate was still the same.

"I have taken the lives of many innocent people. For that, I realize there is nothing I can say. Nothing I can do. Because I can't change the actions that I've taken. I can't change the path that I chose. I can say, however, that I regret it. That I wish I could change everything that's happened. That I have realized that Palpatine was not that man I thought he was. I regret the pain I have caused to millions. I've realized that everything I've done has been for the wrong reasons. Everything I've done since I left the Jedi Order has been evil and calculating. I'm a horrible person. There's only one thing in my life that's worth living for and I don't deserve it," he paused and looked at Padme meaningfully. "I don't deserve anything good. I don't deserve anything worthwhile. Do whatever you feel is right."

With that he sat down and looked up at Padme's tear-stained face and tried to smile at her. His sentence was announced shortly after his speech and he watched painfully as Padme's body shook with sobs. He looked on gratefully as Obi-Wan placed a comforting arm around her shoulders and he nodded to him. For some reason Anakin couldn't quite figure out, Obi-Wan was not looking at him with disdain, but was intensely staring with soft eyes. Anakin shook that from his thoughts and let himself wish that he could be there for Padme instead of Obi-Wan. He could accept his fate, but he knew that Padme would never be able to.

After being led back to his room, he sat down dejectedly and placed his head in his hands. He knew his time was up. He just wished that he could have just one more moment with her. He just wanted a chance to say goodbye.

His thoughts were interrupted yet again when someone entered his room. His mouth dropped in shock when he realized who it was.

"Obi-Wan."

"Hello."

"What are you doing here?"

"I just came to see how you were doing." He replied, taking a mental note of his former apprentice's calm demeanor, kind eyes, and soft voice.

"Oh."

"Did you mean what you said at the trial?"

"Every word."

Obi-Wan nodded thoughtfully and sat down next to Anakin.

"Are you comfortable here?"

Anakin looked around and laughed despite his situation.

"About as comfortable as you can be."

Obi-Wan laughed with him, his eyes shining.

"Yes, if I remember correctly you could get comfortable just about anywhere."

Laughter rang in the room again and it was as if old friends had miraculously been reunited. Once the laughs had subsided, Anakin's face quickly grew serious.

"Is Padme alright?"

"She took the news of your death sentence hard. I wouldn't have expected anything less from her. She's a remarkable woman and extremely loyal."

Anakin nodded and smiled. "What about the twins? Are they alright?"

"They're perfectly fine. Very healthy. Padme's with them right now."

"Good. Just as it should be."

Obi-Wan nodded and smiled at his former apprentice.

"Can I ask you one more thing before you go?"

"Anything."

"Do you regret everything?"

"No. The only thing I don't regret is Padme. Although there are some things I wish I could've done differently, I don't regret my time with her for a second. I love her Obi-Wan. And I love our children. I suppose if any good came from all of this, it's them. Will you do something for me?"

"Of course."

"Train them. Take them as your padawans. They're the Order's only hope for survival now."

Obi-Wan nodded and slowly reached out his hand. Anakin took it and they shook hands fiercely. When they finally released, Obi-Wan reluctantly turned to leave.

"Goodbye, Obi-Wan. Thank you for coming to see me."

Obi-Wan nodded quickly.

"You're welcome. Goodbye."

Anakin watched sadly as his former Master left the room. That was the last time he would ever see him. At least now, perhaps he could die knowing that their fractured relationship had been at least partially mended.


Obi-Wan quickly exited the room and leaned against the wall. He had been right. He knew it.