Waiting

A prequel to the previous.

Some days, life was hard.

Things didn't want to seem to calm down, or to even start up again. It was strange, but sometimes he thought that life liked to be difficult. And others he spared it no thoughts, for his brother was beside him and doing such things...

Guilt was a constant companion, a well-shared friend. Edward tried so hard not to let Al feel any of it, but he wasn't naïve enough as to think he'd succeeded.

Which brought him to where he was now.

A hesitation. "Brother?"

"Yes?" asked Al absently, distracted from his book. Ed waited patiently until he found a good stopping point, understanding perfectly, and then Al looked up and gave him his full attention. "What is it?" He blinked as it occurred to him that he'd said 'brother,' and not 'Al.' Curious. With Edward, it was important to scrutinize all the nuances, and he was an expert.

"I... Well, I wanted to ask you something..."

Oh no. This was a similar tone to that night in Risenbourg, and Al'd later learned that Ed had been going to ask if he hated him. This was ominous.

Al shifted over, put the book down, and wrapped his arms around his brother. For some, that might seem too forward, or not platonic, but they knew each other well enough that not touching was disturbing. They'd come too far for that. "You know you can," he replied patiently.

"I..." Uncertainty played across his features, but then it vanished under self-control. "I guess it's more... tell you something, and see how you react," said Edward slowly.

Knowing it was important not to become impatient and to remain encouraging, Alphonse nodded and looked at him attentively.

A deep breath, and Ed said it all in one go, rushed out before he could stop himself. "Idon'tfeelthesamewayaboutyou." A pause, and he added hurridly, "As I used to, I mean." He flushed.

Al froze in place. "What do you mean?" he asked faintly. It had been a fear of his, for many years, that Edward would lose his insurmountable affection and devotion to him because he decided that a soul harboured in an armor suit wasn't worth it. Sternly, Alphonse told himself he was being ridiculous, and relaxed quite a bit. Still... He'd noticed his brother's tension for days, weeks, months even – and now it seemed to be coming to a head.

Just what could be so important and revelationary that he was so anxious? It wasn't like him, and that worried Al.

"I don't mean like that." Ed hastened to reassure, voice still rushed, face still flushing, posture still distinctly uncomfortable. Oh, he tried to hide it, but he could never truly hide from Al. "I mean, well..." His features became a deeper red.

"You can tell me," said Al. His eyes were so accepting, and trusting and caring, and it made Ed wince without quite knowing why. Or rather... He was afraid of knowing why he did.

"I... I want to show you how much you mean to me."

In slight confusion, Al replied, "But you already have, niisan. A thousand times over."

"It's... It's not the same."

"If you say so," he said dubiously, but nodded his agreement. "Alright. I trust you, niisan; you don't have to ask."

Ed felt sure he did, but it was now or never, do or die. Without allowing himself to think he leaned over and perched a kiss upon Al's lips. It was chaste at first, the only difference between their previous fraternal ones the skin it was touching, but when it broke all Edward could think was how good it felt. And how much he wanted more.

So he did it again, pressing more firmly, body leaning over Al's and hovering above his form. His automail braced him on the couch; abruptly he parted them, blushing deeply with pleasure, satisfaction and anxiety. Ed lurched backwards.

Or tried to.

For Al deftly snagged his arms around him, pulled him forward, and kissed him. This was definitely not chaste, or platonic, or fraternal, or familiar – it was new and exciting and deep and wet and hot and oh, oh this was him, and he'd waited so long...

With relief and lust in his eyes in almost equal measures, Alphonse said with a hoarse voice, "Took you long enough, niisan."

Ed smiled, and they kissed.