A/N: I must curse Zack for his trickery. I just now realized that this fic is based around Zack... and he arrived in a box a few days ago! But... it will be somewhat of a torture fic as a result of his treachery.
Zack: WHAT?!?!
Me: Muahahaha. You shalt suffer for that!
Zack: )eyes dart( For what?
Me: )smacks Zack's head( I win!
Labrat-seph: See! See! I'm continuing! The ShinRa army won't arrive at my door! They won't!
Hallowed Shame: Your welcome... )scratches head( I guess... but I'll give you a laugh now... Ha! There, I gave you laugh.
KT: Yes... you shalt see what's in store for the big idiot! Heh.
Kato Shingestu: Something evilly evil... though I know I'm going to get writers block on this soon... maybe that's because of the fact that I really want to play the mind-numbing game that is Zelda: the Ocarina of Time. XP Beware Zachary! Your Doom approaches in the form of... ME!
A/N: Also, there will be a lot of different view point changes 'cause I fell like it.
Ch. 1 Greeting stranger!
Cloud watched in horror as the black haired man rammed into the wall, leaving a large drool mark
"Are you alright!" he cried. The man behind him just crossed his arms.
"Zachary." he said firmly. The man who lay in a pile raised his middle finger at the man.
"Don't call me that, Seph!" he said, sitting up. Cloud noticed that the man behind him shifted slightly.
"The only way you can avoid Hojo is to die." he gripped the hilt of his sword. "And I can help you with that."
"Why don't you just kill yourself while your at it!?" he sighed.
"It's implausible, I'll just regenerate." the black haired man sighed heavily, running a hand through his hair.
"I won't give him my sword!!!"he crossed his arms and looked away. The silver one sighed. Shaking his head slightly, he looked toward the blonde grunt.
"Would you mind helping me with something?" Clod stuttered slightly, but slowly nodded his head. Nodding back, the man turned back to the sitting parsonage. "I have a plan Zachary." Zack sighed again.
"Oh... for the love of Jenova, not again!" standing up, he walked over to where the man in black-leather stood. He looked up at the 6'1 man and stared with a look of utter anger. "Well... what is it?" The silver-haired man raised his hand and motioned for the two to follow.
(On the way to the apartment)
Cloud slowly followed the two men as they walked past all of the SOLDIER first rooms, until they came to a room at the end of the hallway. The man standing beside the room saluted.
"Good evening generals." the two men nodded in response and walked into the room, while Cloud followed slowly, almost unsure of what to do. The taller man pointed to the large television on the wall.
"Watch." the black haired man looked at him dumb-foundedly.
"Watch what?!" he yelled. The door shut behind him, as if the guard outside didn't want to get between these two. The taller man's eye twitched, but he headed for the room at the end of the small walkway.
"Blue's clues." it took a moment for the man to let this click inside his obviously small head.
"WHAT?!!?!" he cried, nearly tripping over himself in order to grasp the taller man's jacket.
"It will give you more ideas. I have to formulate my own." the man blinked a second, by was then pulled off by a large gloved hand, and a door suddenly closed. Cloud blinked for moment, and tried to comprehend what just happened.
"Fine!" the man yelled, standing up. "I will! And I'll be smarted than you!" Cloud blinked... yet again. Even more confused than usual. "Oh, yeah." he looked to the blonde. "I forgot to introduce myself... or yourself..." he scratched his head. "Uhh... somethin' like that?"
"Uum..." Cloud blinked. The older man blinked, somewhat like Cloud. "I'm Cloud Strife." the man nodded as Cloud held out his hand.
"I'm Zack." he took Cloud's hand and shook it. "That was Seph... but don't call him that." Zack released the boy's hand.
"Why?" Zack smacked his head with his right hand and walked over to the couch, followed by the blonde.
"Because he seems to have a big ego and only likes to be called 'The Great General Sephiroth.'" Cloud stopped dead in his tracks. He then pointed to the door that Sephiroth went through.
"That was Sephiroth?" he asked. Zack nodded.
"Couldn't you tell?" Cloud looked at him blankly. Zack sighed. "Guess not," he said, plopping down on the leather. Cloud slowly sat down beside him. "Now... where is the remote..." Zack started to look through the cracks in the cushion.
"Why do you live with him?" Cloud asked, barely able to keep his voice in control.
"Live with who?" Zack said. He was halfway pulling off a cushion and digging for the remote in a large pile of change. Cloud stared blankly at him. "Oh... you mean Seph.." he jerked his thumb in the direction of the door in which the general went through.
"Yeah." Zack just blinked a few rimes at his new acquaintance, then shrugged it off. He then resumed his horribly long search for the disappearing remote.
"All you have to do is..." he paused and brought a finger to his lips. "Be yourself. Don't think of him as someone who can destroy the world... or some insane dude who will stop at nothing to kill Hojo." Cloud kind of scooted to the other side of the couch at Zack's explanation. "WHAT?!" he asked, annoyed.
"Um... nothing... nothing at all..." Cloud avoided his eyes, until they rested on a rectangular item that rested on the table in front of him. "Is that the..."
"Shh...." Zack then put a finger to his lips, signifying his need for quit. "I'm on a roll, it's gotta be under the next cushion!" he threw off the next pillow-like thing, it hit the wall and went BOOM, a look of disappointment than washed through his features. "I thought for sure that it's be there..." he then started mumbling something about a girl named Alex.
"But... isn't that the..." once again, Zack signaled for quiet. But, this time he pinched Cloud's lips shut.
"If you plan on talking, why don't you find the remote?" he then sat back on the cushion on the other end of the couch, the middle one went somewhere over there, and crossed his arms. Cloud blinked a moment, and then picked up the rectangular box resting on the table, and handed it to Zack.
"Is this the remote?" Zack took the device sourly and clicked on the television. The television that the channel was on was 'ShinRa watch,' a channel that relayed all public information about ShinRa through-out Midgar.
"Stupid channels..." Zack mumbled, mumbling must be his past-time. He clicked through them. The next was the FTV, Fighting television videos, which was currently showing a fight between some Turks and an Iron Giant. Then there was Spamn (hmm.. I wonder which spam is better?). And a few other channels that Zack clicked through so fast, it was implausible to tell what was going on. "Here we go..." The channel was PSE, public ShinRa education. A commercial was on at the moment, giving the man some time to flip through a t.v. guide.
"What's on?" Cloud asked. Zack threw the book at the grunt's head, and made for the remote once again. The blonde carefully took the book off of his head and read the bar for PSE. Five hours of Blue's Clues. Cloud sighed deeply.
"I hope Seph didn't do anything evil..." Cloud jerked his head to the man, whom was poking the remote with a large pole. "Oh, well... guess there's only one way to tell..." he looked over to Cloud. "Pick it up..." Cloud blinked... once... twice... lost count... Zack frowned and threw the stick behind the couch, and it landed somewhere inside the kitchen (with a clinking sound, if I might add). He then reached for the remote. But... there was a knocking at the door...
"ZACK!!" a feminine voice cried. Zack's eyes darted, Cloud wasn't sure if he did that consciously. Letting his hand fall, and hit the table with a thump (heh, this is funny), Zack looked at the door.
"Y- yes?" he stuttered.
"It's me..." the voice said sweetly. It took a moment for something to click in the black-haired man's head.
"Oh, yeah..." he stood up and walked over to the door, Cloud eyes following his movements. He then opened the door, and there stood a girl in pink. "Hiya Aeris!" Cloud sunk in the couch, so as not to be seen by the woman. He had a thought that he shouldn't intrude on their conversation.
"Hello Zack." she hugged him, while he practically sung her out of the house. He released her and pushed her towards the door. "What's wrong?"
"There's a problem and I have to deal with it myself..." he thought for a moment (gasp! He still thinks!) "With Seph's help. You'll have to go, but I can't escort you out." he left the door to the apartment open as he, now, walked Aeris to the hall. "But..." he looked around. A grunt with silky black hair that reached his shoulders ran past, obviously completing some task meant for him by a SOLDIER first. "He can do it!" he pulled the man beside him and turned away from Aeris.
"What is it general?" he asked, a little tint of joy in his voice, not overpowering the fear though.
"I need you to escort my girlfriend out of the ShinRa building, okay?" the grunt nodded. Zack was about to turn back aroun to face Aeris, when another thought struck him. "What's your name?"
"Bob." he said hastily. Zack blinked, and bit back a smile. He then turned arouns, with Bob under his arm, to face the flower girl.
"Well..." he said, trying to find words without laughing. "Bob here's going to escort ya' out out of the building. That alright, Aeris?" she nodded, and then kissed him lightly on the cheek. He released Bob and went back into his apartment. He then jumped over the couch and landed on the middle spot... where the cushion was thrown off... pain for Zack!
"SHIT!!" he cried, practically ramming his head into the ceiling in his rush to get off the couch. "You could have reminded me that there wasn't a middle cushion, Cloud!" he yelled, rubbing his soar bottum (heh, heh... sweet pain).
"I didn't know that you did that..." Cloud mumbled at the pain inflicted Zack. Zack face softened, and walked to the front of the couch and extended his arms toward Cloud, as if going to give him a hug. "Umm..." Cloud was extremely confused.
"Stand up..." Zack said soothingly, a little too soothingly for someone like Zack (count the part in which his buttox landed on some very hard poles...). Cloud obeyed, but was put in a headlock and pushed to the floor. "Ha! What now?!" Zack stood up and waved his arms at an imaginary audience.
Cloud sat up and glared at Zack, but the just poked the back of Zack's knees. Zack then collapsed on top of Cloud and the two had a small fit of laughter. But then, Zack sat down on the left side of the couch, while Cloud sat on the right. Zack then reached for the remote and...
He got shocked with a Bolt 3. Cloud grimaced, but then turned his attention to the television, which was starting a new episode of Blue's Clues.
Disclaimer: I do not own Cloud, Zack, Sephiroth, the Msamune, Buster Sword, Hojo, Aeris, or ShinRa, Squaresoft does. Nor do I own PBS, Nick (Spamn), or MTV, they're just random tv channels that came out from the top of my mind. I also do not own Blue's Clues, and I'm not quite sure who does... I think (never a good thing) Nickelodeon does. I do own Bob and the girl named Alex (though she never appears in the sequal).
A/N: Yay! First chappie is up! And, those of ye whom have read 'Sephiroth and the Masamune,' do you remember Bob? Heh, you should. Also, I have sat on a couch without cushions... and I feel somewhat of Zack's pain... but I prefer to torture him than feel sorry for him. XP Well, review or this fic doesn't get any more updates! Muahahahaha! Also, a new feature...
Random moment of my mind #001:
Cid runs around and around in Kalm and runs into a lamppost. People laugh at his idiotic pain (remember how he runs!).
I/N: I would like to that the internet for pissing me off during this chappie and announcing it's incapability of going on at me house... )sniff(
Zack: HAHA!
Me: )glare( If the internet never works again, which it obviously does if people are reading this, then you don't get to be the star of any more of my fics!... especially the new one...
Zack: NNOOO! Wait... you're writing another fic?
Me: 'Course not, I just want you to suffer!
Zack: NNOOO!
Me: REVIEW!
