RR76: Oy. I was going to update To Love and Die yadda yadda yadda today, but so many people kept telling me to update this, so... yeah.

Review Respomses:

SweetPrincess: I pride myself on my madness. Thank you.

Goldfishgal: And it just gets weirder, you'll see...

writernewbie: Some people have three thumbs... I think. But I'll go with the foot too.

Emm: Um... I'll see what I can do. By the way, I agree. You're kung fu is the best in the world. Just don't tell Whitebrow...

Don't own, don't sue. Get on with it.


Slade's dead body floated in the space-type afterlife aimlessly. After being killed by Nabeshin, he had been rejected for Heaven (ST. PETER: You're kidding, right? Hey Gabe, Slade wants in!), Hell (SATAN: Eeeew, Trigon's bitch? Forget it!), Purgatory (no reason, actually), even limbo (he can't go too low, bad pun). So he was floating around the Space-Type afterlife... until...

"Slade... Slade... Wake up Slade... The Matrix has you..." a voice said. "Hahaha... kidding..."

Slade opened his eye to see a weird sight. A giant twirling circle with a swirly bunch of stars and two arms sticking out of it's sides was staring at Slade... or however a swirly circle stares without eyes. Or something.

"I am the Great Will of the Machrocosm," it said with a woman's voice. "And I have come to restore you. I shall now return this fic to normalcy, or whatever the hell passes for normalcy in this weird universe..."

TWEET!

"Welcome to ACROSS HQ!" Slade boomed. "You have all been selected as the next ACROSS 6, the leaders of ACROSS, to replace Those Men, the original ACROSS 6. Allow me to introduce you to each other...

"That Man, the founder of ACROSS!"

"Ajibajakonubenokutosmart!" That Man said, in a weird launguage that only he could understand.

"Il Palazzo, who was once insane, but is all better now!"

"Deception is the art of hiding the truth from the eyes of others... or something like that." Il Palazzo said... or something.

"The Master #1, who is the servent of Manos!"

"SALUTATIONS INFERIOR BEINGS! KNEEL AND TREMBLE BEFORE ME FOR I AM THE MASTER AND YOU ARE MYSTERIOUSLY DRAWN TO ME!" The Master said in his evil voice. Which is just like his normal voice, come to think of it...

"The Master #2, who is a vampire and died at the end of the first season of Buffy the Vampire Slayer!"

"Um... what am I doing here?" The Master #2 asked, all confused-like.

"Fat Man, the head of Novicorp!"

Fat Man was messily devouring a beefsteak. "More gravy!" he shouted.

"And finally... me!" Slade finished. "And as the ACROSS 6, we must... um..."

"Do EEEEEEEEEEEEE-VIL things and try to conquer the world?" The Master #2 asked.

"Yeah, that!" Slade shouted. "Even more importantly, we must assign lackies. Each ACROSS 6er shall have one lacky." He took out a list and an EEEEEEEEEEE-VIL pen.

"Il Palazzo, you get Excel Excel. That Man, you get That Lacky. Master 1, you get Torgo."

A weird guy with a cane and a hat started wobbling out of a random room to Master 1's side, twitching all the while.

"Master 2, you get the EEEEEEEEEEE-VIL frankfurter. Fat Man, you've already requested Gondol."

"HE IS NOT RESPONSIBLE HERE!" Fat Man bellowed. Then his face got all screwed up. "Hold on, I'm passing a ham through my left ventrical... there..." he said, after the ham had finished it's passing.

"And that leaves me with... Terra." Slade ended that last word with a hint of disgust. He looked over to see Carson standing, Terra's head still on a pike. He looked at Slade and hugged the pike close to him, causing a piece of Terra's brain to fall to the floor. Wait- Terra had a brain?

Slade faked a sigh. "Oh well, I guess that leave's me with the Robin Blow-up doll!" he said cheerfully, pulling an uninflated heap out of his pocket.

The door exploded and the Titans burst through. Robin opened his mouth to say something but changed the... um... thing he was about to say (got a brief writers block there).

"Is that the blow-up doll of me?" Robin asked.

Slade sweatdropped."Um... no."

Raven read his mind. "Yes it is," she said.

"Dude, what kind of sick Michael Jacksonlike bastard would want a blow-up doll of Robin?" Beast Boy asked, shocked. Starfire blushed and raised her hand.

Robin shook his head. "Enough of this. Titans, go!"

Slade raised his finger. "ACROSS 6, TAKE THEM DOWN!"

The screen got all swirly and Robin, Cyborg and Starfire stood on a screen with meters telling how much hit points they have left. Slade and That Man appeared on the other side.

SLADE ATTACKS the screen said. Slade moved forward 2 steps and punched the air. Robin jerked and fell down. ROBIN DIES.

Meanwhile, Beast Boy and Raven took on the other 4 ACROSS 6 in a fashion that wasn't weird. 'Course, I'm too lazy to say how, so let's skip ahead.

Thump. They fell down, cause they were dead. Then Cyborg and Starfire joined Robin. But twas not the end! For the Great Will of the Machrocosm brought them back to life and back to their tower, where the next chapter will take place!

R/R