Ron's Little Patch of Love

By Katie Melchior

Disclaimer: All J.K. Rowling's Ideas. Again, I've enforced page 404, paragraph three in OotP! Enjoy!

Special Thanks to ZHeRoTaN!

BAM! Hermione Weasley shut off the shower and stepped out of the shower, throwing a towel over her as she went. "Oh God! Where's my bathrobe?" she muttered to herself as she looked at the hook that was now empty. "Ah well, I'll just have to do without it." She walked out of the bathroom, clutching the towel she wrapped around herself, and headed to her room. "Ugh…where are my robes? I left them on the chair!" Hermione looked around her closet and drawers, but could not find her plain work robes. "Accio Workrobes!" Nothing happened. "Accio! Accio! Accio!" Feeling furious, she stalked out of the room looking for Crookshanks.

"Meow! Meow! Meow!" As Hermione walked downstairs, (still wrapped in her towel and dripping wet) she found Ron curled up with her bathrobe on the couch. His mouth was open, and he was snoring and saliva was come out of his mouth. Next to him she found Crookshanks purring loudly as if having a nightmare.

"Ronald Weasley!" exclaimed Hermione, shaking his shoulder.

"Huh? What? Get on the Firebolt Mione…we've gotta get on the Firebolt…" he was reciting a dream with his eyes half-open. After this slight spasm, he sat up straight and stared at her. He laughed at her appearance. "You alright darling?" he asked, halfway through a chuckle.

She narrowed her eyes. "No I am not all right, Ronald Weasley. I got out of the shower only to find that my bathrobe was missing. So, I come down here, and there you are, just sleeping away with my bathrobe as a pillow." Ron only laughed and pulled her arms down so that she was at his sitting height.

"Nothing that I can't fix," he grinned mischievously and starting kissing her furiously, and started to take off her towel.

"I knew you would do something like this!" yelped Hermione, ending the kiss, slapped him, and pulled her towel back around her. "Now give me that!" Hermione pointed to the bathrobe he held in his hands.

"Not unless you take that off first."

"Don't be stupid, Ron! I've got to go out; our nephew is stranded somewhere out there, smelling of mud puddles and needing a bath!"

"Can't we let Ginny and Harry have a niece or nephew?" asked Ron, with a sad little puppy dog face.

"No," Hermione said shortly. "You are one of the most immature man I have ever met! Not only do you come home at three in the morning, not even bothering to get in your room with your sheets, but you steal my robes and bathrobe, and then try to…try to…well…try to…"

"You're the one that's immature Hermione. For your little know-it-all mind is too busy trying to save our nephew than hang around, with me."

"I am not!" she pouted.

"You are too!"

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"Not!"

"Too!"

"Not!"

"Too!"

Hermione sighed. "Back up…did you just say I'm too busy trying to save my nephew than to be with you?"

"Yep, that's right," said Ron gloomily.

"Ron, we've only been married a year…"

"So?"

"I want to see the world, take S.P.E.W. a little further, I'm not about to settle down and be an old house wife!"

There was silence for a while, as the hatred of Hermione's words sunk into Ron's skin. "You know you'll never be an old house wife."

"If only you were a bit stupider…"

"If I was only a bit stupider, than I would have the guts to go up there in the dead of night, only to find you ready and raring to go, kissing me when you are not upset with me for stealing your robes and bath items."

"I knew it," whispered Hermione under her breath.

"My little patch of love, you are correct."

"Hand over my robes."

"I'm not that thick."

"You wish."

"You must find them! It shall be a quest for my fair lady!" he said, in a voice resembling Sir Cadogan of Hogwarts.

"I think not! I have a limited amount of time, here! I need to get to Diagon Alley in the next hour, and I can't go naked!"

"Yes you can."

"No I can't!"

"Yes you can."

"No I can't!"

"You can."

"I can't!"

"Can."

"Can't!"

"Can."

"Can't!"

"Can."

"RONALD WEASLEY! I AM NOT LEAVING THIS HOUSE UNTIL I GET MY PLAIN SET OF WORKROBES, AND YOU ARE GOING TO FIND THEM FOR ME! IF YOU DON'T, I SHALL THROTTLE YOU WITH MY BARE HANDS! IS THAT UNDERSTOOD MR. WEASLEY?"

"No Mrs. Weasley."

"WHAT?"

"I said no Mrs. Weasley!"

"YOU BEST CHANGE YOUR MIND!"

"I'm nowhere near changing my mind! Now go and find your own work robes! You don't need my help. Bloody hell Mrs. Weasley, your robes can be found with a simple summoning charm."

"I already tried that! And nothing happened!"

"That's because I transfigured them."

"No you…"

"Yes I did. And I'm much more mature than you think; I'm not going to fight again with you Mrs. Weasley."

There was a long pause. Hermione spoke. "What did you transfigure them into?" she asked in a very bored voice, as she watched the twinkling in his eyes fade.

"Don't you want to know?"

"No, because all of the last three times that you stole my robes, they were turned into little lingerie dresses."

Ron chuckled. "But you put them on didn't you?"

"Ron!"

"No, I didn't transfigure them into lingerie this time, incase your wondering."

"Changed your style, have you?"

"A little bit, yeah."

"What Accio charm must I say this time?" asked Hermione, with a touch of curiosity in her voice.

"They're dress robes…actually…very…very…very…sexy…dress robes…"

"You're too much Ron!"

"Well, I had about twenty extra galleons, and I thought…"

"Twenty galleons! We could have paid off the mortgage on this house!"

"You deserve it, my little patch of love."

"Fine. Accio Dressrobes!" as Hermione gasped with surprise, she looked at her husband. He grinned. A scarlet red spaghetti strapped dress with a v-neck zoomed toward her. It had glitter all over it, and, Hermione noticed, was short…it only went down to her knees. "You're terrible!" she exclaimed, holding the dress up to her.

"So…you wanna go out tonight?" as he gave a sexy little smirk.

"Oh yes," she headed toward him and started kissing him furiously.

"Is this the woman I thought said she didn't want to be a mother?" he asked through a kiss.

"Uh-huh. But I don't care right now."

They kissed for quite a period, until Ron spoke again.

"You never answered my question," he said through a kiss.

"I would've thought that to be obvious."

"Maybe I need more convincing."

"Maybe I think you need love."

"Maybe your right my little patch of love."

Hermione sighed.

"You know, it used to be much easier to ask you out," said Ron, his eyes lighting up at the thought of his Hogwarts years.

"I don't think so. Did I ever start to furiously kiss you when you asked me out in seventh year? Mmmm? You just wait."

"I love it when you sell your kisses to me. You are of course the smartest woman I've ever met."

"How am I smart?"

"It didn't take you long to figure out my weakness," said Ron, finally ending the everlasting kiss.

"I must've forgotten it. Was it…" Hermione stopped, mid-sentence.

"Yes, I'm afraid you've stumbled upon it again."

"It's been awhile since you've kissed another girl…" said Hermione softly.

"I haven't kissed another girl my entire life."

"You are a nasty little liar."

"Maybe so, but I swear I've never kissed any other girl in my life." There was silence as the air filled with love.

"So, if you've never kissed anyone else before, how would you know I was an excellent kisser?" asked Hermione, her own little sexy smirk appearing on her face.

"I use my own judgment."