The Cost of Revolution
I realize, with a start, that it has been hours since I was supposed to hear from my ship. Part of me wishes, not for the first time, that my daughter would not volunteer for these missions. The realization that there is nothing I can do makes me restless, and I begin to panic. I've never felt so alone since my wife died. I'm terrified that Leia is prisoner on a battle station that I'm not supposed to know about as it officially doesn't exist. It's supposedly the size of a small moon. I can only imagine what they'd do to a caught member of the Alliance.
Of course, there had been no stopping Leia from trying to get her hands on the Death Star plans. "Dad, you know I'd never forgive myself if I could have done something and I didn't because I was afraid then a planet with billions of innocent people on it got blasted," she'd explained.
I knew what she meant, for I'd certainly risked my life before, knowing I was one of the few who could do something. Having influence, though it seems to be less and less every day, and recognizing a fascist dictatorship is forming, is responsibility. I'd gotten Leia, not to mention the ability to live with myself out of the bargain. I couldn't ask for better, though the Empire still exists.
After sending what messages to the Alliance I could, even though I was sure they wouldn't arrive until too late, I ask through the official channels if anyone knew where my daughter was. Somehow I'm not surprised that everyone claimed to have no idea where she could possibly be and expressed fake sympathy. Everything about those captured by the Empire is kept secret unless they'd like to make an example of someone.
I allow myself to think, for the first time, that there is a good chance I will never see my daughter again. I'd throw myself even further into my work for the Alliance to dull the pain and get revenge for her.
Looking out at the sky, I notice the full moon, and part of me recognizes that there is something strange about that, though I can't put my finger on it. Then I remember that when I looked out the night before, the moon was only a tiny sliver.
