Series: Snapshots of the Past

Story: Endings and Beginnings

Chapter 8

Disclaimer: See Chapter 1

Previously: Lizzie woke up!

Summary: Jed is still feeling guilty after he sees the affects of Liz's injury

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Christmas in New England isn't quite as cliché as it might sound. The charming towns and quaint little villages that encompass the region really are blanketed with fresh snow that overlaps their confines and spills into the larger cities. Holiday shoppers actually do walk to their destination, usually in groups, crossing Center Street, under the large green archways that symbolize the festive season.

They don't shop at malls. They prefer the small boutiques and Mom and Pop shops that line their village's busiest street. This time of year, Christmas colors adorn the storefronts, angels and stars are placed prominently in the windows, and homemade ornaments and other tidy gifts intrigue passersby.

Sometimes, if you listen closely, the sounds of carolers can be heard echoing into the heart of town over the bustling noise of pedestrian shoppers. Each and every view is a postcard waiting to be captured and to a young girl, the magic of the season comes alive with the roaming Santa spreading holiday wishes.

"Daddy! Daddy! It's Santa Claus. Can I go talk to him? Pretty please?"

Elizabeth was never a shy child. Her enthusiasm usually outstretched her tiny frame and even the limited boundaries of a moving vehicle couldn't restrain her larger-than-life gestures.

"Of course you can. Let me just find a place to park," Jed answered her.

He had only taken Liz to New Hampshire once before and just like now, she pressed her little nose up against the window, overwhelmed with excitement. The roaring sounds of the big city were gone, replaced by quiet and peaceful neighborhoods and the laughter coming from the quintessential town square, where children her own age ran freely to throw pennies into the icy fountain. Ice skaters glided through the air and spun around on the frozen ponds throughout the village.

It truly was a winter wonderland.

"Hurry, Daddy! He'll leave!"

"He's not going anywhere, Angel."

"It's Christmas Eve! He has a lot to do!"

Before Jed fully stopped the car, Liz unbuckled her belt and reached for the door handle. "Don't you dare," he warned.

She giggled under her breath and flashed her blue eyes in his direction. "Sorry."

Walking hand-in-hand across the street, he escorted her towards the jolly man in the big red suit. Liz skipped along in a vain effort to pull her father to meet her pace. A light sprinkle of snow gathered on top of her chestnut hair, a few specks even whitening her lashes.

Jed stopped suddenly and turned her towards him. "Hang on, Sweetheart." He pulled her under a nearby awning and bent down to straighten out the bandage that still covered the cut on her right cheek. One week out of the hospital, her injury hadn't healed enough to remove it entirely.

"Daddy!" she whined.

"Mommy's going to kill us if we let it get wet." She flinched when he tightened the tape, accidentally brushing the fabric against the wound. "Did I hurt you? I'm so sorry."

"That's okay. Let's go!" She grabbed his hand and leapt towards her destination. "Santa! Santa!" she called out.

Santa stopped and turned back immediately to find the little girl still dragging her father along. "Hi there."

She tilted her head to look up at Jed. All her contagious childlike passion escaped her own body and latched on to his in that one glance. He was now as infatuated as she, but the source of his fascination wasn't the conversation with Santa. It was Lizzie's joy. She greeted him with a friendly smile before introducing herself.

Once the meeting with Santa was over, it was time to deal with the reason for the road trip -- Ellie's present. Jed led Liz into the same boutique he visited the year before. The sales clerk handed him a a shiny silver box that Liz was all too eager to open. He lifted the lid and let her peek inside, charmed by the gasp he heard in response.

"You like it?" he asked as he pulled the glass ornament from its sanctuary to reveal Ellie's name hand-painted in lavender.

"Uh huh! It's just like mine but mine is pink."

"That's right. Why don't we tell Ellie this gift is from you to her? Does that sound like a plan?"

She nodded enthusiastically. It's rare that the joy of giving strikes someone so young, but it had. Liz's recuperation period was spent using acrylic art supplies to make ornaments for Ellie. She spent hours gliding the translucent red and colorless crystals into a piece of twine that she then manipulated into the shape of a candy cane.

Her only reward - a smile from baby sister. It was well worth the effort if it made Ellie smile.

But this time, Liz didn't get a smile.

Abbey held the baby in her arms as Liz presented her with the gift-wrapped present Jed had bought. Ellie's tiny fingers grabbed the colorful paper and the three of them began to pull. Once it was open, Liz took out the glass ball. Ellie's attention wasn't on the trinket. It was on the person holding it.

Her eyes fixated on Liz. But it wasn't out of love. It was out of confusion. The seams of Liz's bandage were unraveling and she was left with a tiny gap between the gauze and her skin. When the six-year-old leaned in a bit closer to hug her, Ellie clawed her face as she yanked the fabric with a loud shriek of tears.

Liz screamed along with her, clutching her cheek in pain.

"Ellie!" Abbey moved the baby away from Liz as Jed and Mary ran to help.

"It's okay, Lizzie." He adjusted the bandage then pulled her up into his arms in an effort to comfort her. It didn't work. Her cries were suddenly louder and Jed realized it wasn't the physical pain she was reacting to.

"Sweetie, she just got scared. She doesn't understand," Abbey told her.

When that didn't help, it was up to Jed to try again. "Lizzie, look at me."

With her hands wrapped around his neck, she lifted her head and calmed her sniffles. "What?"

"Did she hurt you?"

Liz buried her head back into his shoulder. She was always good at avoiding questions she didn't want to answer. Jed was even better at getting her to answer them anyway.

"You know, I remember a time when I tried to play a trick on you. I walked in dressed as Santa and you were just a baby. You nearly clawed my eyes out when you reached for the fake eyebrows I glued over my real ones."

"I did?"

"Yeah, you did. It was something unfamiliar and you didn't like it."

"And that's how Ellie feels," Mary added. "She's not used to your bandage. That's all."

Jed turned Liz in Abbey's direction so mother and daughter were face-to-face. Abbey held Ellie up so she could see her mother gently pat her sister's face.

"Look, Ellie. It's okay. It's supposed to be there." Abbey guided the infant's hand so she could feel the material for herself. "See?"

Ellie's confusion faded gradually as Liz leaned in again to hug her. She still didn't get a smile, but she didn't get a shriek of horror either. Unable to control his own emotions, Jed lowered Liz to the ground and headed out the front door, followed almost immediately by Abbey.

She opened the flaps of his winter coat and approached him from behind, folding him up into the satin lining and hovering over the collar with her hands clasped across his chest. "You okay?"

"The bandage is uncomfortable. It's hurting her."

"It's only for a little while longer. The wound is healing."

"Then what? She'll have a permanent scar."

"We don't know that. She might not."

He turned towards her, but took a step back to escape her grasp. "She might," he countered.

"You can't think like that."

"You know, this would be a lot easier if you'd just yell at me. Go ahead. Yell. I can take it."

Abbey squinted her eyes as she struggled to comprehend his sudden mood swing. "What?"

"Better yet, hit me." He opened his arms to give her a target. "Just let out all your anger and hit me. I know you're still pissed."

"I told you at the hospital this was not your fault."

"Yes, you did. You did tell me that. You did, only two hours after you said it WAS my fault, so you'll forgive me if I'm a little confused here."

"Are you picking a fight with me because you're mad at me, or at yourself?"

"Oh no, I'm mad at you and at the school, at the bus driver, at the entire system." He rubbed his forehead with his fingers and took a seat on the cement steps in front of him before continuing. "The cops can't even find the bastards who did this. It was a mob. Everyone's denying ever throwing anything at the bus. Who knows who did what with a crowd of protesters. Or so they say."

She sat down next to him. Close to him. "You don't believe that?"

"I don't know what to believe." He jerked abruptly and slammed his hand into the concrete. "Damn it!"

His hands vibrated with pain from the impact. She covered them with her own, dulling the sting only slightly. "They're still investigating. They haven't closed the case. It'll lead somewhere."

"Yeah." He wasn't convinced. "Sorry I snapped at you. Seems like all I'm doing lately is apologizing for one thing or another -- to you, to Lizzie, even to Ellie."

"Then stop." His dismissive laugh didn't get by undetected. "I'm serious, Jed. I yelled at you at the hospital because I was upset. I wanted someone to blame. And yes, truth be known, I did blame you."

"And now you don't?"

"Now I see how hard you're working to fix this. When is that city council meeting?"

"Next week."

"You're about to change policy all because you took a stand that I was too distraught to take. You did it for Lizzie. I was wrong about what I said. I regret it more than anything in the world. You love your daughter more than your own life and everything you're doing, you're doing for her. The fact that you want to protect other kids in the process...well, that just makes me love you more."

He wrapped his arm around her, pulling her closer towards him. She bent her head to kiss the hand he injured only moments earlier. They mingled closer together, offering the comfort they could only get from one another.

And later, when the girls were asleep and they were alone, they comforted each other more intimately than they had since the accident. The redemption that Jed longed for still wasn't within his reach, but he was inching himself closer to it now that he knew unmistakably that he was doing it with Abbey's support.

TBC