House was speechless. This was a three Vicodin moment. He took out his bottle and swallowed them without water, closing his eyes and waiting for the relief to come. When he opened them again, he realized that it hadn't worked. They were all still there, waiting for him to treat them.
He was looking down at the pile of charts in his arms, trying to decide if it would be best to get the least painful cases out of the way first or to save them for the end. Looking between the woman in the bunny suit and the woman who was blindfolded and chanting, he wasn't sure if there was a case that wouldn't be painful. He picked a folder at random.
"Jessie," he called? "Sortofvague?" He saw the girl with the blindfold stiffen as a trail of saliva dripped out of her open mouth. Looking at her chart, he could see no reason for such behavior. This could prove to be interesting after all. He walked over to her chair, avoiding the puddles of drool on the floor. He was close enough now that he could hear some of the words that were spilling from her lips. "We are not incredibly insecure. We are actually able to trust another human being. We are not angry, misanthropic… The words sounded familiar. "Could you tell me what the problem is, Jessie?"
Jessie ripped the blindfold off her face and her eyes snapped up. "You want to know what my problem is? I think a better question would be what's your problem, Dr. House? I think that with them, it's a massive amount of small things that have accumulated over the course of the series. I don't know that I want to go through everything... but hopefully people watch the re-run of Fidelity next week very carefully. Cameron gets a lot of screen in that episode, and the centrifuge conversation is so great. Especially what she says to him right before both of their pagers go off. (I HATE the pagers. Honestly. Obviously they're necessary, but they're the most blatant plot devices ever. On the other hand, I love them for that. I love when the pagers go off and cut off a scene at precisely the moment where it's about to get REALLY interesting, because I know the writers are laughing to themselves about what they know our reactions must be. For me, a lot of screaming and waving my arms around.) But, anyway. Yeah, I forget where I was going with that. I should stop distracting myself with pager rants. I guess I could reiterate what I said about tragic flaws: We see exactly how each character sort of screws him or herself over, but we also see that they can't do anything other than what they do, because that's THEM. And that's how real people are, geez. And that's why we love these guys so much, and get online and argue about them with strangers. And form Defense Squads for them. What I'm trying to say is, you love Cameron, you twit, and everyone knows it! I just came here to let you know that!
Oh, and I forgot to mention: SQQQUUUEEEEEEEE!
Dr House looked both taken aback and frightened. Especially when Jessie let out the squee she had been holding inside for what felt like forever.
"Don't worry about it", Hue, the most perceptive among the ladies said, "she does that all the time. She's a well educated, analytical shipper/fangirl."
"That's the most dangerous type", House said seriously. "Deceptively simple at first glance, but ready to pull out an intelligently worded criticism or essay at any time. Keep your eye on this one. She could get dangerous if crossed." He turned from Jessie, who was drooling once again, quickly moving to the next folder.
