(Disclaimer- I like disclaimers...weeee! I don't own this game...so you can put your daggers away. readers tuck daggers away Anyways this is my first fanfic ever written on and I hope you enjoy it.)
"Lewi! Get me a soda!" Dustin yelled to Lewi who happened to be in my kitchen at the moment.
"Thats not funny!" Lewi glared at him.
"Yes it is! You do it to your sister Shiloh all the time!" Dustin laughed.
"Goddammit! Shut the fuck up! This is a cutscene here!" I screamed at them. Lewi and Dustin...always fighting...like a couple. They used to be a couple at one time...now exsactly a year ago...but now...they were just friends.
"I'm so funny..." Dustin pretended to laugh.
"No you're not!" Lewi threw a soda at him.
"Well...what about me?" I asked. I only did it to mess with Lewi who stomped back to the kitchen and threw a soda at me.
"She abuses us..." Dustin pretended to weep.
"You are an asshole..." She yelled.
"Well you're not a delicate flower yourself either." He took a look at Lewi whom like usual wore all black. But I shouldn't talk...since Dustin and I dressed the same way. Dustin wore black lipstick, and his stupid Slipknot shirt. I hated that band. It was after all one of the only metal bands I despised for some odd reason. I love metal...except...that band. Overrated piece of...well. Anyways...thats not the point. The point is...we all scared people. But our obsession with the Final Fantasy series...was undying.
"Lets watch a 1000 words!" Lewi begged.
"Stupid song. Gosh! You guys are such losers. How can you listen to that kind of crap?"
"You are a true idiot..." I glared at Dustin.
"I'm just kidding! I love that song..."
So as 1000 words was playing...Dustin of course had to ruin it.
"remember Joey, Lewi?" Dustin grinned at Lewi. "Just imagine his naked body on top of you...oh Lewi..." I started laughing. Joey first of all looks like a hobbit...and his voice...its like a dying frog...ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.Yuck.
"Stop it! Dustin thats gross!" Lewi glared at him angerly.
"Oh Lewi..." Dustin continued making moaning and panting noises.
"Thats it!" Lewi said angerly and got up to kill Dustin.
Dustin got up and did the worst thing he could ever do...he tripped over my ps2 cord knocking it down and causing it to shatter on my hard wood floor. The disk came out and was sizzling and now the whole house smelled like burnt plastic. I was speechless...
"I am so sorry..." Dustin looked shocked. But that was it. I was boiling with anger.
"YOU FUCKING BASTARD!" I screamed and lunged at him.
"Wha-" Dustin suddenly froze. Lewi froze in place and I couldn't move either. Out of the corner of my eye I could see I giant warp hole coming out of where my poor precious playstation lay...and slowly...it was sucking us in.
-
"Katia! Wake up! Are you okay?" I heard a voice which sounded strangely familiar. I opened my eyes and saw Rikku and Yuna staring back at me. WTF? Was I dreaming?
"Is she ok?" Rikku asked.
"I don't know Dustin." Yuna replied sarcasticly.
"What? Why did Yuna call Rikku Dustin? This is a wierd dream." I got up on my knees and shook my throbbing head.
"Um...Katia...er...Paine..." Yuna said as rocking back and forth.
"What is going on here?" I asked stroking what apparantly wasn't my hair. Then it hit me...Yuna...Rikku...then I was...I had to be...Paine...Then I burst out laughing. "Hahaha! Dustin! Now you truly are a monkey! AHAHAHAHAHA! And a girl!" I stopped gasping for air as my two friends watched me in horror. This had to be a dream.
So for about five minutes we stood there staring at each other until I burst out laughing again.
"Yuna! We have a new mission-" Brother suddenly appeared out of the giant airship that landed next to us a few seconds ago.
"Um...why is Paine laughing...I've never seen her laugh so-"
Just to see if it really worked I glared at brother and said "minus ten respect points Brother."
"Ymm nekrd ymm nekrd E's cunno (All right all right I'm sorry)" Brother replied looking a bit astonished and stepped farther away from me. I actually undrestood al bhed!
I motioned for Dustin(Rikku) and Lewi(Yuna) to come closer to me.
"What are we going to do?" Dustin asked.
"Hurry up guys...Yuna got to get her garment grid back and I found the special costumes." Brother tapped his foot impatiantly.
"We seem to be exsactly where the game begins..." Lewi explained.
"I noticed...anyways we've played this game a million times so we know how everything goes...right?" I was careful to let only those two hear.
"Right!" They both replied.
"Well...we better call each other by the characters names and such..." Would this really work? We started heading toward the airship until Yuna just stopped in front of Rikku and me causing us to crash into her. That was just like Lewi. Never waiting for us...then stopping for no apparant reason just because she had a passing thought.
"Hey!" I punched her in the side lightly.
"Um...I don't understand what brother said in al bhed..." Yuna complained.
"I did! Hahaha!" Rikku laughed. "A loser again!"
"Dus-I meant Rikku...shut up now!" Yuna glared at him.
"I never heard Yuna talk like that..." Brother commented.
"Oui pa xiead!(You be quiet!)" Rikuu yelled to show that she indeed did know al bhed.
"Maybe you can find the booklets lying around...those help you learn..." I wonder if that was true.
"How long it take to get onto the airship? Hurry up now!" Brother yelled jumping up and down with anger.
We scrambled up there with brother glaring at all of us except Yuna. Poor Lewi. How come everything bad happened to her...but then again she did tell me she thought brother was cool and hot. 00 We just climbed into the airship and just as soon as we began to analyze the sorroundings brother handed Yuna a costume and pushed us out and said "Hurry...you know plan right?"
"That was fast..." Yuna looked suprised.
"I know exsactly what to do and say!" Rikku looked astonished. "It's like I...ok we better get into position." I knew exsactly what to say too and what to do...it was just so wierd. Like the characters important actions in the game were in my head without me worrying what to do next.
I turned around to see that Yuna was now wearing her moogle costume.
"I bet Adam would love to see you in that..." Rikku just had to comment.
"Shut up Dustin." Yuna glared at him through the costume.
"Awww...I'm just kidding! You look adorable. Adam would have loved that."
"Go!" I yelled to Yuna and she ran off. A few seconds later I heard Rikku say "Y, R, P, in position. It's showtime, girls!" Girls? I thought. If everyone only knew that Rikku was Dustin. But I got up and headed toward the roaring crowd. Heh Heh. Time to kick some ass...They never let me do it at school...but this was different.
"Hurry up Paine!" Rikku called and I ran to catch up with her.
"Weee! This is fun!" I laughed...wait...Paine doesn't say weee. I had to watch that. I knocked the guy out and slid down the stairs and landed next to Rikku. Wow...just like the game. We jumped on the platform and ran to the fake Yuna. I was about to find out what a real battle was like now. This would be interesting. "Hey! Give it back already!" Dustin knew just what to say.
"Boys!" Leblanc yelled. I knew she wasn't really ?.
The two Goons appeared and readied for battle. They looked like they were about to piss themselves with their battle stance.
"Want in on this number? Then show me your moves!" Leblanc said exsactly what she said in the game.
"Think you can keep up?" I said laughing. Deep inside I wondered if for me that would really be true?
"Get ready to die bitch!" Rikku ran up to a goon and slashed him twice with her theif blades. Actually the battle was just like the game...we ran up to each other and slashed. That was odd. When you play the game you don't mind fighting like that...but in real life? Bullshit. I ran and finished Leblanc off. It didn't even hurt when they slashed you...seriously...all you saw was your hit points go down...and they appeared right next to you too...this was very odd.
"Just like the game..." Rikku wishpered to me after the battle ended.
"Hey! You can't talk until I'm done talking!" Leblanc yelled at us as she fixed her shirt up. Err...dress...whatever it was.
"I could've danced all night." Was my reply. It just came out of my mouth...wierd.
"Sorry, no time for an encore." Like I needed and encore. I hated Leblanc as soon as I got the game...she reminded me to much of a certain someone. The imposter ran off and now Rikku and I chased her as fast as we could.
"Hold still! Goddman bitch." Dustin...errr...Rikku added extra quotes. I guess as long as we said whatever needed to be said we were fine and could add extras.
"Oh no! Now we lost her! Damn it!" I yelled angerly.
'Don't worry we always catch up to her some how and- Hey, you run too fast!'
"You're too slow; little girl." A Man with Two Guns said. I forgot his name at the moment. For some reason I just couldn't remember it...
"Show's over! Bwahaha!" A very fat guy said. I couldn't remember his name either. So odd. God! He could use to lose a few pounds.
"Yeowch. Ick. God hes so fucking fat..." Rikku looked disgusted. "And I thought our old 8th grade enlish teacher was bad..."
"This way. Oh and yes I do agree with you...in the game he was a bit thinner...or maybe smaller...but I was wrong..."
Suddenly we heard gunshots and turned around to see Yuna doing a flip and shooting at the two assholes that were chasing us.
"Shit! I got gum on my boot..." The fat guy complained after him and the tall skinny guy had lost the battle.
"Oh be quiet! We got bigger things to worry about then your gum...I gotta go to the bathroom..."
"That's quite enough sniveling, boys." Leblanc appeared. "Persistent, aren't you?"
"My grid. I want it back now you stupid slut!" Yuna yelled.
"You give us back Yunie's Garment Grid right now!" Rikku yelled.
"Yunie?" I questioned...oh wait that was part of the game too...great.
"Didn't you girls ever learn to share?" Leblanc was asking for it now.
"Give it back! Damn bitch!" Yuna was getting very angry.
"Very well, it's yours." She laughed. "But it won't be yours for long, loves!"
"Loves?" I asked. Ick...what if Shalyn was Leblanc? Shalyn said loves all the time. But seriously...
"This is what battles are like? They're just like the game!" Yuna wishpered to me. Yuna finished Leblanc off and she crumpled to the floor.
"I won't let you off so easily next time!" Leblanc ran off with her wierd sidekicks. I heard the fat guy complain about the gum and he got a smack in the head in return.
"Get back here! Actually don't! We don't want to see soft core porn anymore! Your boobs are all saggy anyways!" Rikku called after them.
"Rikku." I said...well thats what I had to say.
"What!"
"Nothing!" I had to say that. Its part of the game.
"Um...Yuna...what are you doing?" Rikku asked.
"I can't...stop...dancing...I feel so lame..." Yuna started laughing. I guess that was part of the game too...what else was next? Phew. I had already had quite enough for the day. Rikku and I just stood there watching Yuna act even like a bigger idiot. Could it get any worse?
-
(Gasp Oh no...this chapter is over already. I just had to write this story or I felt like I was going to burst. I love writing. Too bad they don't have a Drakengard section...sniff I wrote a good fanfic for it too...oh well. Await the next chapter!"
