A/N: I left you guys a cliff-hanger, so I figured I should update pretty quickly. And I have. So ha.

Disclaimer: Blah blah don't own blah JK Rowling blah blah blah blah monkey blah Paul.

I sincerely hope you didn't understand that, because if you did, you need serious help.

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The Stalker

Chapter Four

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When we last saw Monica...
"What are you doing?" asked Harry warily.

"Oh, I'm stalking you," she said matter-of-factly.
Insert commercial break here.

"What?" Harry said flatly.

"What, don't believe me?" Monica said indignantly. "Fine; I'm actually an evil follower of an evil wizard who is out for your blood and everyone is afraid to even say his name. Here, I have proof: at the end of your last school year, he lured you to a secret government agency and killed...ah, your godfather. Your school headmaster then told you about a prophecy that said that you have to kill my evil wizard master. Oh, and you had a really horrible teacher last year who almost prevented you from coming and thus nearly ruining my master's entire plan."

Harry gaped at her, for little did Monica know that her theory was entirely plausible. And, indeed, for the most part, entirely correct. Except for the whole her working for Voldemort thing, which is utter codswallop, because, one, Voldemort would never employ a Muggle, two, Monica is underage, and three, somewhere, a bell rang and an angel got its wings.

Harry was completely stunned. Any decent agent of evil would never have revealed all that, unless they were about to kill him. But in any case, this girl looked completely insane, so she probably wasn't going to kill him at all and was just randomly revealing evil secrets.

Monica noticed this, but didn't say anything. She wanted to know how he'd react to something as obviously made up as that. Little did Monica know that he was trying to figure out the best spell to use to stall her so he could run away, back to his safe little house. And little did Harry know that she actually was making it all up, but getting facts eerily accurately close to his life.

Harry made up his mind and pulled his wand out of his pocket. "Leave now and I won't hurt you!" In his head, Harry was thinking, Oh, wow, Harry, can you get any stupider? Like she's going to listen. Wait a minute, doesn't that girl live over by Mrs. Figg?

"Woah, now, Harry, I was kidding." The invisible Order member following Harry relaxed. It didn't look as if this girl actually was a follower of Voldemort. If she were, she would have been a lot more sneaky and called him "Potter", not "Harry". Hell, even Snape called him Potter, and Snape was supposedly on their side.

"And what are you going to do with that stick?" Monica looked at it worriedly. "Maybe you are deranged. I don't like the look of that stick. Though, at least it's not thick enough to really do any damage. I mean, you really couldn't, say, molest—" Harry cut off her ramblings.

He said confusedly, "Wait, what were you kidding about, now?"

"Huh?" said Monica. She would have thought that was obvious. "The working for an evil wizard thing, of course."

"So you really are stalking me?" Harry asked, now completely lost. He was under the impression that stalkers didn't tell anyone that they were stalking someone.

"Well, yeah. And I'm doing it blatantly and obviously, so that no one will notice," she told him, deciding that if she could just get him a little more confused, he'd toss her off as completely crazy and would discount everything she said as insane ramblings, just like her teachers at school.

"You confuse me," said Harry. "What's your name?"

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A/N: I am so lovin' on the cliff-hangers lately. Big thanks to my reviewers! Monica reminds almost everyone of someone they know, which is somewhat disturbing.

Please review, because I'd like to know what you think, whether you like it, hate it, think I should be committed, whatever. If you guys don't start reviewing more, I'll write a poem or song. So it's really in your best interests to tell me what you thought, huh?