I wrap my arm around his waist as we approach the door to the mansion on the sprawling estate. "You need to breathe Finn." I tell him calmly.

I feel his arm tighten around my shoulders. "I haven't been home in four years love. I don't think I can breathe."

I look up at him. "Why not?"

He shakes his head. "I'll make you a deal. We get through this dinner, and I'll tell you over drinks at Shalahan's."

I narrow my eyes. "Coffee in a coffee shop so that we can actually talk." I counter.

"I suppose you're going to insist?"

I nod. "I think I am."

He sighs. "Fine, but you asked for it." He reaches forward and rings the bell, and the door is opened immediately.

"Master Thaddeus, welcome home." The butler at the door nods slightly, then looks at me. "And you would be Miss Lorelai."

I was almost about to laugh when I realized he'd called me by my first name. "You know my name?"

He nods. "You are Master Thaddeus' girlfriend, are you not?"

I look up at Finn sharply, and notice the resigned look on his face. "Leave it alone love, it's not unusual." He offers, leading me into the building. "Thanks Stefan."

"How did he know my name Finn?" I hiss darkly.

"I probably should have reminded you to call me Thaddeus." He offers.

I freeze. "I'm not calling you that." I deadpan. "It's ridiculous."

"Then you'll have to call me pumpkin or muffin or something because my family really doesn't like nicknames. Pet names are one thing, nicknames? Not so much. They call Colin, Colingsworth."

I shake my head. "His name is –

"No, they just don't like his name. You're lucky you have a unique name."

I'm about to reply when a tall woman enters the entrance hall. "Thaddeus, darling! You're home!"

His frame straightens. "Mother, how have you been?"

"Fantastic." She grins, turning to me. "You, of course, would be Lorelai Leigh."

I nod. "I am, actually. It's nice to meet you."

"Lorelai, this is my mother Germandria."

I smile as warmly as I can without laughing. "You have an amazing home."

She nods. "It's a bit more modern than your grandparents' house, but I quite like it."

"You know my grandparents?" I ask carefully.

"Oh, dear, of course not! But I have heard of them, and seen pictures. I thought we'd take coffee in the drawing room." She leads us further into the house, and I tighten my hold on Finn's waist reassuringly.

"Breathe." I whisper carefully. "If you pass out, this is going to take longer."

I settle into the couch next to him. "Are you okay?" I ask carefully.

"I don't know." He sighs. "I've been putting off going back there since I got into Yale." He admits.

"It was a little…sterile." I offer.

He snorts. "That's an awfully gentle way of describing the white palace."

I smile. "What happened?"

He sighs again, and rubs his face. "My younger sister died in a surfing accident. I was seventeen at the time, and Anelicania was fourteen. My mum, she snapped, couldn't take it. Cleaned the house of any conceivable reminder of her existence. Turned into the woman you met today."

I smile sadly. "And you left for the states."

"First opportunity I had. In case you're wondering, yes, that's when I started drinking on a regular basis."

I pull him into a tight hug, and feel him begin to shake against me. "You're allowed to miss her Finn." I whisper.

"That's just it love, I wasn't." he chokes out.

I pull back to look him in the eyes. "You are now. You are here. You will always be allowed to miss her when I'm around. You've been a really good friend to me, despite pretending not to know me. I want to return the favor."

He shakes his head softly. "I get now why Logan has kept you so close for so long."

I smile. "Six weeks is not as long as you think Finn."

"For him it is."

I shake my head. "Yeah, well…" I trail off.

He pulls back carefully. "You're thinking of ending it with him." He says suddenly.

I smile sadly. "I'm not sure." I admit. "I mean…I know that he's new to this commitment thing, but the possessive streak? It's a little much for me. I've been down that road."

He shakes his head. "I never thought I'd be privy to Logan losing a girl." He offers calmly, pulling me into his chest and leaning back on the couch.

"Honestly, when Logan and I started this, I didn't think I'd be the one to end it." I tell him. "I think the only reason I haven't done it yet is I'd miss the rest of you."

"We're not going anywhere love. You're stuck with us now."

"You're his friends Finn."

"And now we're yours too. Jason explained the Foster's bond. If nothing else, you'll have me. Logan never drinks Foster's. Not expensive enough for him. Come to think of it, Colin doesn't drink it either. You'd be stuck with me."

I laugh. "I guess you're feeling a bit better?"

He nods. "As much as I can." He glances down and meets my eyes. "I'm never going to get over losing her to the ocean. If I'm completely honest, I stay away as much because I don't want to face that beach as my mother."

I push back. "How long has it been?"

"Nearly five years."

"Do you think that facing the beach will make it easier to face your family again?"

He stares at me. "What are you talking about love?"

I take his hand, and pull him out. "Do you want your mother back?" I ask bluntly.

He nods. "Of course I do. But short of bringing my sister back from the dead, I don't think that's going to happen."

"Finn, she needs to accept the loss. In order to help her do that, you have to accept it."

"I can't go to that beach love." He whispers.

"Even if I'm right there with you?" I ask carefully. "What was her favourite food?"

"Raspberries." He answers automatically.

"And her favourite drink?"

"Mango juice."

"So we'll go to the beach with raspberries and mango juice, and you can tell me more about her."

He swallows deeply. "You're not asking me to say goodbye, right?"

I shake my head. "No, I'm not. I'm asking you to remember her."

"Am I allowed to bring liquor?" he scrunches his face.

"Raspberries and mango juice." I remind him. "This isn't about you Finn. This is about her."

He nods, and I take his hand to lead him out the door.