A/N : I'm glad this fic got a positive response, it seems I have you all intrigued! I had chapter one pretty much written from a while ago and most of this chapter too, they just needed finishing off and beta-ing, after this I'm going to try to alternate my updates between this and Life's Full Of Surprises. I'm determined not to abandon that just because I want to write this too, and hopefully I won;t get confused since that is the real characters and this is all-human. Anyway, thanks to; Sweetbitter, Samolly, wicked-angel3, BuffyandDracoLover, Sara, spike wuvs buffy, SouthernRain, Rachel, and twisty-treat, for all the reviews. Here's the next chapter...
(For disclaimer, etc. - see chapter 1)
Chapter 2
Same old story, here he is again. Drink in his hand and a scowl on his face, already having turned away three prospective shags, because he just can't handle it tonight. He's been completely off since four nights ago, or was it five? When he met the girl, the blonde one, Buffy.
She was different, he knew that much, but as to why she'd caught his attention, Spike really couldn't say. She was average enough in looks, averagely beautiful but still, there were plenty of rivals for her in the club of an evening, tonight included. So why did she cloud his thoughts, just as the alcohol clouded his mind, drowned the memories he didn't want anymore, for a little while at least.
It was almost nine months, would be exactly when next Thursday came around, but still he saw her, even with his eyes closed, dark hair and dark eyes that wouldn't shine anymore, not for him or for anyone. Oh God how he hated himself, sometimes wished he could just end it all, but suicide was the cowards way, this way he suffered like he probably should. Suffering for his sins, her sins, everyone's sins upon his shoulders, at least it felt like that sometimes, so heavy and dark.
"Hey" Spike heard off to the side and despite his thoughts of the blackened past he realised he was smiling just slightly as a light broke through the dark, blonde hair shone beneath electric lights, as she smiled back at him and took a seat, "I was hoping I would see you again" Buffy told him.
"Why?" he asked, without even thinking it through. He was sure he didn't really want to know, but obviously he was wrong.
"I wanted us to talk" she shrugged, "things didn't go quite how I planned the other day"
"You mean when I told you to leave me alone?" he smirked at her, knocking back the rest of his drink and putting the glass down in front of himself on the bar. Against his own better judgement, and without waiting for an answer to his question, he asked; "Drink?"
She merely nodded in response and watched him order two more of the same from the barman, such a natural thing for him to do, ordering drink after drink. Spike absently wondered if he used to drink this much, then almost laughed when he realised he couldn't remember, so the booze was doing a good mind-numbing job after all, just like he wanted it too.
He watched her as she ran her fingers around the glass that he was sure was less fragile than she was. He watched her eyes as they flitted between the surface of the bar, the drink, and him, as if she were looking for something, maybe waiting for something, or trying to find the courage to speak.
"So..." she drew out, obviously the third option was true, Spike realised, there was something she wanted to say to him, maybe ask him, she was just having trouble.
"Spit it out, luv" he prompted her, "I haven't got all night" which was a lie because he had, and he figured he'd have a better time with her than anybody, but that wasn't the point right now.
"Tell me about yourself" she said suddenly, looking him right in the eye. Despite her shy and breakable surface, Spike saw fire in those eyes, a real power and strength that she kept inside, he was certain she'd be something incredible to behold when that escaped, when she was angry, or when she wanted something, it would almost be worth making her furious just to see what would happen, or there were other ways to evoke powerful emotions, more interesting ways.
"Don't think there's much you'd care to hear, pet" he said after a while, looking away from her gaze that almost had him hypnotised, "Certainly not much I want to tell"
He kept his eyes on his hands and the glass they cradled, maybe if he ignored her she'd go away, though a large part of him, that he found most annoying, nagged at his insides, and made him want her to stay.
"So, you won't talk to me" Buffy sighed, "Will you dance with me?" she tried.
He smirked at that, she was nothing if not persistent in her attempts for his attention, though why the silly bint wanted anything to do with him was a mystery to the man himself. She was an angel and he was the devil, she offered her heart and he would take her soul, or so the stories said, he wasn't sure where fiction ended and reality began anymore.
"I don't dance" he told her more severely than he meant to, everything came out worse than he planned lately.
"You don't talk, you don't dance...what do you do?" she pressed, quite determined that he would listen, and it was working, he realised as he almost laughed, it'd been a long time since he'd done that. What was it about this girl?
"Not much that's of any use" he told her cryptically, "that's what I do, and yourself?" he asked, raising a scarred eyebrow. She smiled a little, and he could guess why, his question proved he was interested in her, a fact that grated on him because he didn't consciously want to give a stuff, but he couldn't help himself somehow.
"If you mean for a job, I'm a waitress" she told him, and he looked at her incredulously, he knew she was worth so much more than serving all day breakfasts and wiping tables. He knew without a doubt she could be anything she wanted to be, so he had to ask;
"Why?"
"Why, what?" came her reply as she looked away from him, he wondered why she couldn't hold his gaze, why she shied away. The breakable walls closed around the strength within, the power he'd seen before...it seemed maybe she was hiding as much as he was.
"I don't know" he said absently, in answer to her question, his eyes travelling all over her as if he might see some sign to explain what she was all about.
She was a riddle and a mystery, one minute one thing and one minute another. She was an enigma he would love to solve, written in a code he'd take pleasure in cracking.
Maybe he could, maybe he should, maybe he would if she'd let him, she seemed willing enough and the night was young. He had all the time in the world and nothing to lose anymore.
~ * ~ * ~ * ~
It had been a few days, she'd deliberately not been around. Buffy knew how this guy worked, read the files over and over til her eyes went wonky and her brain functions seized. She knew him inside out and she knew how intrigued and obsessed he got with puzzles and tricks and things he couldn't have or couldn't solve. She needed to be one of those things, needed his attention, fully and completely. He had to trust her, he had to want to tell her what she needed to know without her pushing too hard.
"Hey" she said as casually as she could, taking the stool beside him, just like the other night, she noticed they were on the exact same two seats as then "I was hoping I would see you again" she told him as his eyes drank her in. It was discomforting and thrilling at the same time, the way he looked at her, the fact that his eyes were a certain kind of blue that she didn't have a name for.
"Why?" she heard him ask as she watched his fingers turn his glass around and around on the bar, it didn't seem he was even aware he was doing it, maybe some kind of nervous twitch she wondered.
"I wanted us to talk" she shrugged "things didn't go quite how I planned the other day" she told him all too truthfully. He smirked and for a split second she wondered if he knew everything, if he'd been waiting for her to come and talk to him again just so he could deal with her in his own way.
"You mean when I told you to leave me alone?" he asked rhetorically and it didn't occur to her to answer him, she was far to busy being relieved. He offered her a drink and she absently nodded her acceptance.
'Was he always like this?' she wondered as she observed him ordering their drinks from one of the barmen, the most natural of tasks to someone like him. 'Did the alcohol drive him to it, or did it drive him to the drink?' She'd find out, that and many other things, if it all went according to plan, and it would, she'd promised herself, and others, that very thing, and as in all things Buffy refused to fail.
"So..." she dragged out, desperate to avoid having to actually drink the vodka he'd bought for her.
"Spit it out, luv" she was prompted, "I haven't got all night" Spike said with a further smirk, and she no longer wondered at how this man held so much female attention so easily. He was way above average looking, she'd never allowed herself to think that before but she was thinking it now and there was nothing she could do to stop.
For just a moment she was real and serious, a girl in a bar who liked a guy and wanted his attention, but only for a second before she was back to the job in hand. No time for daydreams and fantasies, especially not where he was concerned.
"Tell me about yourself" she said, taking a small sip of her vodka and looking carefully at his body language as he in turn looked upon her. He visibly tensed at her question, just for a moment, if she'd have blinked she would have missed it, but there it was, she was trained to notice things like that.
"Don't think there's much you'd care to hear, pet" he said after a while, looking away from her gaze, something that relieved and disappointed her at the same time, half of which she felt guilty for "Certainly not much I want to tell" he added more quietly, and Buffy inwardly cursed. He had to open up to her, she knew there must be a way to make that happen.
"So, you won't talk to me" she reasoned "Will you dance with me?" she tried, it wouldn't do much good in making him talk and divulge his secrets, but it would bring them closer, physically, and hopefully that could lead to them being closer emotionally, all he had to do was feel comfortable with her.
"I don't dance" he said flatly, almost nastily, but she was not offended, she knew better.
"You don't talk, you don't dance" she sighed in annoyance, some real, some added for effect "...what do you do?"
Again there was a long silence as he looked at her, and she absently wondered what he thought he saw when he looked into her eyes, when he studied her so carefully. Her mind wandered into dangerous territory as she considered what he might think of her.
"Not much thats of any use that's what I do" he finally answered her question "and yourself?" he added, finishing off another drink and she couldn't help the smile that curved her lips. He was at least a little interested in her, and that was all she needed for now, a little would go a long way.
"If you mean for a job, I'm a waitress" she lied as smoothly as before, her fake employment, her fake last name, it had been ingrained into her mind as much as the details of this mans life, it came so easy to her to just re-iterate what she was supposed to be. She was an actor in a play and she'd learnt her lines well, how well did he know his was the question now?
"Why?" she was surprised by that, not entirely sure what he meant and momentarily thrown by the look in his eyes, inquisitive as a child but demanding as the man he was supposed to be. She needed time to process what he meant and come up with an answer.
"Why, what?" she asked lamely and she worried when he was silent, when his eyes covered her completely, burning her from top to toe as his gaze travelled up and down as if he were looking for something he could only find right there in her. Determined not to be outdone she did the same to him and was ashamed to say she liked what she saw, he was more than she realised, every part was gorgeous, and a despicable part of her longed to know if what she couldn't see was as breathtaking.
"I don't know" she barely heard him say, neither her question nor his were relevant anymore. There eyes and hearts and souls seemed to speak every word, because despite the fact she knew she shouldn't, Buffy was thrilled to know there was only her in this whole club that Spike wanted to look at, only her he wanted to pay his attention to.
It was a good sign for the mission, but she had to admit, way down deep inside somewhere, behind the exterior of her job and her act, the neglected woman in her was thrilled just for herself. She was going to have to be careful about this and if she had any sense at all she'd give it all up, let someone else deal with the case, but he was her project to deal with, and he'd be even more than that. As dangerous of a game as it was for her to play, she wanted him to be simply hers.
To Be Continued...
