Yelen's ramblings: I have this thing for pretentious one-word chapter titles so bear with me. Also, I have no idea where this is going, so…bear with me as well. And yet another thing, the creativity well has been extremely parched as of late and I'm once again convinced that I can't write so…gee, let me guess, bear with me? Bwahahaha…whatever. (PS. The date and time in italics are just for my own reference; they've got nothing to do with the fic.)

(March 5, 2005, 1.52 a.m.)


One: Fall

Sometimes, a moment is all it takes to turn your life upside down; even more so when such moments arrive insidiously, in little snatches and peek-a-boos that tease and taunt, so that you barely have time to make sense of it when it finally culminates in a whirlwind and sweeps you off your feet. The extent of the damage caused is also further exacerbated if you've never really noticed the signs – a drop of rain or two, a soft, sporadic clap of thunder, or simply heavy rain clouds, things that could've saved you, if only. But then the earth-shattering moment comes along and draws you into its hypnotic embrace, and you willingly follow because it feels right, and if something feels so right, surely it can't be wrong.

But who's sure anymore nowadays? Even Akagi Haruko isn't really sure, a hundred percent, of Rukawa Kaede's intention when he gave her that definitive moment which tilted her world by three hundred and sixty degrees. It was so simple that it was almost insignificant, but Haruko knows as well as anyone and everyone that nothing is immaterial with Rukawa Kaede when he is the one calling the shots. As a result, Haruko has thrown all caution to the wind, pushed away the nagging voice in her mind that questions the events that have already transpired, and is focusing on the moment, the now, and the feelings that so conveniently come along with the ride.

It was like a dream when it happened. She was watching the basketball club practice, as usual, standing at her usual spot by the door and accompanied, as usual, by her friends, Matsui and Fujii. Things were so ordinary that she could almost predict what was going to take place next: Sakuragi bickering with the apple of her eye, the super rookie Rukawa; her brother quelling Sakuragi's antics by executing a heavy punch on the head; and Mitsui and Miyagi ignoring the commotion and going about their practice as per usual. Watching them, she smiled, an undeniable warmth in her heart; they'd come so far together, and they were finally beginning to look like a team. Things were going to be okay.

It was with that comforting thought that Haruko decided to leave early that day and head home to get started on her school work. She had an important test coming up which she must do well for if she didn't want Takenori nagging at her all day long about how she should stop wasting time watching basketball practice and use the time for her studies instead. She knew that her brother meant well, but she couldn't help but wish sometimes that he was a little bit more appreciative of her undying support for his team.

She was about to approach her brother and tell him that she was leaving when out of nowhere, a basketball whizzed precariously in her direction, and it would've hit her right smack in the face if Matsui and Fujii hadn't called out, "Haruko, watch out!" The instant Haruko saw the ball, she quickly jumped out of the way and to safety, thus sending the ball flying into the wall.

All were silent for about two seconds, until the short-lived silence was disrupted by none other than Sakuragi Hanamichi.

"You stupid, lousy, idiotic fox!" Sakuragi shouted in anger. "You almost hit Haruko, you piece of shit! How dare you still call yourself a basketballer? Go to hell you sub-par amateur!"

Sensing the eruption of another one of Sakuragi's legendary brawls with Rukawa, Haruko quickly said, "It's okay, Sakuragi. The ball didn't hit me." Don't make a scene, she pleaded silently with her eyes.

"But Haruko, it almost did! And it would be his fault if it did!"

Haruko was about to reply, and she would have, but she noticed something that made the words stick in her throat. Rukawa was walking towards her; not only that, he was looking at her, and it wasn't just a barely-there glance that revealed his contemptuous indifference towards her either, one that she was already so used to that she was numbed to its initial hurtful effects. This, though, was a real look, genuine eye-contact, and Haruko thought that she was quite possibly dreaming when Rukawa was suddenly right in front of her, his startling blue eyes still on her.

And then, the seemingly-impossible happened.

"You okay?"

He spoke. Not only that; he spoke to her. Haruko felt the whirlwind enveloping her, tossing her dangerously off-balance, her footing lost; Rukawa's face, so up-close, seemed unreal and almost foggy, his ethereal beauty so striking that it made her breath catch in her throat. It was like a dream, one in which Haruko's happy ending never ended, and simultaneously, it was real – so real, in fact, that Haruko could barely believe that it was happening, as paradoxical as it sounded. She stared at Rukawa, straight into his eyes, and in that moment which comprised of merely a few seconds, Haruko knew that her life was never going to be the same again.

"Uh, y-yes," Haruko finally stammered as hotness covered her cheeks. "T-thanks, Rukawa."

Rukawa nodded. A few more seconds passed before his eyes finally left her, and when they did, the brief moment was over. Wordlessly, Rukawa retrieved the stray ball and went back to practice without a further glance or word to Haruko.

But it didn't matter anyhow, not to Haruko anyway; because to her, those two words that miraculously escaped from Rukawa's lips were more than enough to satiate her desire for him for the rest of her life. She was in a daze, possibly floating above cloud nine; her eyes still trained on Rukawa, she watched mutely as the super rookie forcefully dribbled past a couple of second-year bench warmers and, looking as if he were sailing into the air with his feet planted firmly on fluffy white clouds, executed a one-handed slam dunk so powerful that the goalpost still rattled loudly as he let go of the rim of the basket and landed easily on the ground.

"Haruko…hey, are you okay?"

"Huh?" Haruko replied distractedly, her eyes still fixed on Rukawa. "Oh, yeah…"

It was only until Haruko felt hands circling around her arms that she was jolted out of her reverie. Matsui and Fujii were pulling her out of the gym, their faces wearing identical worried looks. Once out of earshot, Matsui said, "Okay, what was that about?"

"What was what about?"

"That," Matsui replied with an edge of exasperation to her voice, pointing uselessly at the gym. "Rukawa talking to you. What happened to you after that?"

Haruko frowned. "Nothing happened to me," she insisted. "What are you talking about, Matsui? I'm fine, really!"

"Haruko…you looked as if you were in love with him," Fujii joined in tentatively, her watchful eyes ready to detect any signs of defensiveness in Haruko's face. "Are you?"

In love? What was she talking about? Of course I'm not in love with Rukawa! I'd be stupid to be!

"What are you talking about now, Fujii?" Haruko said with a laugh – one that betrayed her nervousness. "I'm not in love with him! I just admire him, that's all. Have some faith in me guys!"

In love? With Rukawa Kaede? How could Haruko ever do something like that to herself? She wasn't stupid enough to set herself up for hurt and perhaps even pain; she knew that no one could ever get close to Rukawa, unless she were something special, a goddess sent from heaven to match his own divine godliness, and she knew, too, that she wasn't that person. She was too plain, too simple, too easy for someone like Rukawa, whose complexities of the mind and of the heart were so intricate that she was afraid of getting lost, losing her way, if she ever had the chance to attempt to unravel the mystery map to the treasure box that contains the key to unlocking all the bolts that Rukawa had secured around himself. She might be simple, but one thing was for sure – she was not stupid.

Or was she? When she got home that day, all she could think about was Rukawa, her homework tossed somewhere to a dark, tiny corner of her mind. She replayed that almost-illusory moment again and again in her mind, like a music video put on heavy rotation on MTV; and each time she saw Rukawa saying those two words to her, that curious feeling she felt so intensely in her chest and gut deepened in magnitude.

Was she in love with Rukawa Kaede? She wasn't…

…but she is now.

Haruko stands, rooted to the spot, her back against the wall of her classroom, which she was about to enter before…this. Her mind is a total blank, except for her incoherent mental babbles about how she absolutely cannot believe what is going on right now, right this moment. She feels like she's standing delicately on a single cloud, letting it take her further and further up into the sky, and she's so high that she feels the world spinning lightly around her. What an incredible feeling.

"You free today after school?"

"Uh, y-yes," Haruko replies, her voice too unnaturally high-pitched to her ears, her heart thumping wildly against her ribcage. "Um, why?"

"Meet me at the school gate. Okay?"

"Okay," Haruko says in a soft whisper. Okay. Of course it's okay.

She's still standing like a statue cemented onto the concrete floor outside her classroom as the hallways become first deserted, and then empty. When Haruko realises that she's awfully late for class, she hurriedly pulls herself away from the wall and, still in a daze, walks briskly to class. She doesn't even notice when her teacher berates her for being late; she doesn't notice, either, the worried glances cast in her direction by her two best friends.

Right now, all she's seeing is Rukawa Kaede's beautiful face in her mind, and all she's hearing are his words, 'meet me at the school gate', over and over, and then she knows for sure that she has fallen, irretrievably, irrevocably, irreparably, for Rukawa Kaede.


"You shouldn't have done that, you know."

The corridor is empty; classes have started five minutes ago. Amidst the silence, those words intrude like a burglar in an opulent house bent on stealing all things valuable, ostentatious as they might be. Rukawa stops his leisurely stroll; he turns around, and looks right into the face of Mitsui Hisashi.

Rukawa almost smiles. Fancy him saying something like that.

"Really," Rukawa answers, an ironic edge to his tone.

Mitsui stares steadily at Rukawa, who reciprocated with a look so choked with contempt and superciliousness that he's nearly certain that the older boy will back down. But this time, Rukawa is wrong; Mitsui does not back down even an inch. Instead, Mitsui holds on tightly to his sturdy gaze, and Rukawa realises – with some amusement – that he's never seen the older boy this serious before.

"What were you thinking?" Mitsui hisses, his eyes staring daggers at Rukawa. "She's Akagi's sister. Do you really want to tear the team apart?"

The team? Rukawa snorts. How dense can Mitsui possibly get? Does he think that he can stubbornly remain in the dark forever?

"No, sempai," he replies coolly. His hands shoved into his pockets, he says as a parting shot before he turns and walks away, "Just you."

TBC