Title: If You Believe

Author: Chacha

E-mail: Jake & Hamilton

Rating: PG-13

Disclaimer: Don't own 'em.

Feedback: Yes, please!


Once upon a time
I always did as I was told
(yeah)
And every day and night
I tried to make it on my own

Hamilton knocked on the door but got no answer, so he half-opened it lightly just to let himself in then closed it behind him and locked it. He had apparently something in mind and was actually ready to confront Jake. He was banking on it, his Jake, with all the courage he had. Tell him about all his real feelings towards him, and what he had been through those last weeks of sleepless nights from the day his lips touched those of Jake. Even though it lasted only for seconds, for him it was like an eternity. To tell him how much he liked it and how much he would like to retry and taste that feeling again.

Hamilton, much to his surprise, found Jake into a deep slumber, pillowing her head on her arms that atop her desk. She seemed to have drifted off while she was studying. Hamilton neared himself to her without really wanting her to wake up; he just took the chance to observe her, looking at that angelic face of hers in her sleep beauty.

Hamilton suddenly felt the strong urge to reach and touch her, and he did. He raised his hand to stroke slightly Jake's lustrous black hair.

'How can that be possible to be drawn to someone that much…?' He asked himself 'God, I can't even restrain my self from getting closer to him'. With that Jake woke up startled by the closeness of Hamilton to her, she blinked at him and then exclaimed "Hamilton!"

"Hey Jake, I, huh…I was just going to shake you up" he answered a little worried.

"Oh, sorry I drifted off awhile ago, I'm a little tired lately with the whole practice and classes, you know…" she said.

"Yeah, I know what you mean…" Hamilton chipped in.

She smiled at him warmly before she rose up from her chair and strode over to her bed mentioning him to sit down and start the assignment.

But I had a secret
I needed someone there to tell

A half an hour later, Hamilton was lying on his back on Jake's bed, they'd already finished the work a moment ago and were just trying to laugh off the awkward situation. Hamilton sat up to face Jake once again, but this time he kept staring in those big hazel coloured eyes of hers; with that colour of her shirt bringing out the green in them. He was eyeing her hungrily; she dropped her head forward to ease the discomfort she was feeling.

You said look inside yourself
You can break the spell

"Jake!" He called.

"Yeah?" she responded raising her head to look at him.

"Do you…you think we can …umm… be on the next assignment together, coz it's very nice to study with you" he admitted.

"Yeah, ditto, why not" she smiled.

The silence regained again. Then Hamilton stood up giving Jake a start.

"Jake, I gotta tell you something…I …I like you Jake" he confessed

"Thank you, Hamilton, that goes straight to my heart" he gawked at her eliciting a soft smile from her.

He took one of her slender hands in his, which just fit perfectly, and looked her in the eye before beginning:

"No Jake, you don't understand; I…I mean I like you more than just a friend…I want you to myself…I think I'm in love with you, Jake" Hamilton cradled Jake's face in palms and kissed her with all his hidden passion, letting all his feeling pour in that. Jake in the heat of the moment forgot herself and kissed him back.

Hamilton retrieved gently holding her eyes with his, all his emotion playing across his face; he uttered "Jake. Tell me it's not just make believe, you really kissed me back coz I felt it, otherwise I'm really starting to go insane", "I don't care anymore, whatever I can be gay or straight, I only want to be with you, Jake, I tried to push all the feelings you woke up in me from that day you kissed me on the rooftop, my heart was saying one thing but my head wouldn't let go, so I've tried, I've tried very hard without any success to hate you not even to forget you…here I'm baring my soul and pouring out my heart to you ", "It's the only chance I have to be happy and it's all up to you, you're my blissful happiness. I feel so happy the second I'm around you, you became my world, I can see everything clearer through you, you're so different from all the others, from all the persons I've known in my whole life, and I feel this way just towards you…I love you Jake and I hope… I really hope you feel the same way you too" He gasped out the confession.

Eyes moist with tears, Jake retired her shaking hands back from his, and stood up striding slowly towards her desk, trying to assimilate what she had just heard. She thought she could never have him in love with her as she was so deeply and so desperately with him, she thought she would never hear these words coming from his mouth, matter-of-factly.

"Jake I'd understand if you wouldn't be friend with me anymore or not talking to me at all. I've just told you about all my feelings but still haven't listened to yours…please just tell me, even if you don't feel the same way, just tell me…" he pleaded with those puppy dog eyes of his.

Jake made her way to face him and stood just right before him and finally unsealed her lips to say, "Hamilton, you don't know how many times I've dreamt of this moment to happen…and to answer you, yes…yes I feel the same way. I've liked you from the very first moment I saw you, and I actually think that I…I'm in love with you too"

Believe the voice inside of you
Live out your dreams and make them true
Through your eyes, I may see
With your love, you set me free
Wishes can come true
If you believe

"I know we hurt each other lots of time but not on purpose. I understand all your rejections Ham, what could you have done before all the guys around school who thought you were involved in a relationship with me."

Jake was remembering the day she asked him to help her on getting back her bike when he blew her off, in the beginning, while she was the less expecting it, and surprisingly enough, helped her on retrieving it back from the clutches of the dean, his own father. In order to pay him back, she asked him if he liked to go on a ride with her and once more deceived all her warm hope of them becoming friends again. The worst was the realization that dawned on her; she just knew at that moment and for real that she was hopelessly in love with him, she'd liked him the minute she clapped eyes on him. It was tough enough to be near him and not being able to tell him about her real feelings. She'd cried her eyes out of all hurt she was sensing every day. They had classes together, she tried with all her might to avoid his looks, to keep away from him, but she always found herself drawn to him, as if it were magnetic force or something; she couldn't herself figure it out.

"I have something to tell you and that will probably shock you or maybe just relieve you; I'm quite the reverse of what you think…I'm a girl, Hamilton …" she finally spoke.

"That's a bit much!" He stepped back.

"I'm serious Hamilton; I am really a girl, I know I kept putting off telling you the truth but… Ok, you don't want to believe me, here…" She started pulling her long sleeved shirts and then the Velcro, always clasping her chest, came separated to show her lace bra. "Oh, my…" He stared at her breast for some time then raised his eyes to her face, gawping, anger swept over him; he was at his wits' end. He stared in disbelief; he couldn't quite believe it. He drew back and just rushed out of Jake's dorm room leaving her sobbing on her bad behind, "What Have I done…!" Jake boomed in a tearful voice, feeling an overpowering sense of guilt.

Hamilton ran, ran and ran he couldn't stop running he just had to run from the person who'd just messed with his head all that time, he couldn't stay after what he had just been told, still hadn't got over the shock.

He had finally admitted to himself he was gay and now the person whom he thought had turned him a fruity turned out to be the beautiful girl whom he had always hoped for. That just beat his chest and completely pissed him off.

He finally stopped; his knees were knocking and his heart was thumping. He went into the woods where he used to go whenever he wanted to think about things. He actually went many times there in order to have conversation with himself, lately. He could not stand being near Jake and not telling him about what he had been through since the day she kissed him. He had been driven crazy with the fight of his heart that told him something against his head telling him another, he knew he had to confront Jake sooner or later and the moment came that night, but he was the less expecting it, to be aghast by such news. He needed to compose his thoughts.

"How could he…she do this to me?" He whispered underneath his breath, propping his head in his hands" She just toyed with my feelings" A thousand ideas raced through his mind. The news on one hand relieved him; he finally understood what his attraction to Jake was due to; on the other hand, he was too much upset because Jake lied to him from day one. He thought he was his best friend, but he apparently was far off from it, he'd even questioned himself on account of her.

Jake's girl, who would have thought it? -Everything is coming clear now; why she is so fragile and so peculiar from all the other guys, all those feelings I have the second I am near her, she smells so good, so sweet; her skin feels so smooth when it brushes mine. When I am near her all that I want is to cradle her, wrap her in my arms and never let go of her. How couldn't I notice that right off the bat?

I opened up my eyes
And every wish I had was granted

All those feelings, I didn't know what to do with, a while ago, but now I definitely know. I like everything about her as a guy or as a girl she really is too much to resist! And that crazy face of an extreme beauty of hers, I'd look at her forever and still not get bored, but that entire situation is totally screwy.

My mind is made up; I have to return to her. Like a moron I left her alone back there in her dorm room, I have to return to ask her to forgive me. I needed some time to think things over, but now I know she surely has her reasons for doing this. I didn't behave properly towards her; I'll crawl if I have to until she forgives me this time. Plus she requites my love for her though…

And to my surprise

I found myself with you the night chanted
Everyone can make a change
I knew that when I met you
Together we can make it
If you feel it too

Before long, Hamilton was standing just before Jake's dorm room knocking lightly not willing to wake up the other guys in the hall. Without getting a reply, he turned the doorknob and walked in quietly. His hunch paid off, she was there, sleeping peacefully with her lips slightly parted; she had waited, her heart in her mouth until she trailed off.

He noticed her silky rosy cheeks still stained with tears but hesitated first to reach across and wipe them away for awhile; then he eventually did. Jake stirred a little and opened her eyes to the sight of Hamilton's cute face looking at her. His hands thrust deep in his pockets; he kept his eyes on her.

Jake got a swift reaction by getting up from her bed asking him, "Hamilton! What are you doing here?" she queried. "I thought you were…you were…"cut off by his sudden grasp of her two hands, tears started to well up in her eyes. She cast down, groping for words when she stated "I'm so sorry, Hamilton, I…I just…" goggling at him she whispered, "I don't know what to say…I…" Hamilton kissed her hand and closed the gap between the two of them, looking deep into her eyes, he said "Don't say anything, Jake…", and then leaned over to kiss her on the lips, sweeping her off her feet. They kissed for what seemed like a lifetime before Hamilton stood back just to look at her, and his face relaxed into a smile, his eyes looked strained. Jake stepped forwards and hugged him tight, letting him know her gratefulness; he just wrapped his arms around her pulling her closer to him.

Believe the voice inside of you
live out your dreams and make them true
Through your eyes, I may see
With your love, you set me free
Wishes can come true
If you believe
Wishes can come true


whispering sweet nothings in her ear; he began "You really are beautiful!" "I don't know how I could have been so blind not to see that before." She lifted her head to look at him, beaming. "This is beyond my wildest dreams" he muttered under his breath, "Thank god, I'm not gay!"

Jake speechless took Hamilton's hand and pulled him to her bed to sit down face to face.

If you believe in love
Wishes can come true if you believe

If you believe in love
Believe

Believe the voice inside of you
Live out your dreams and make them true
Through your eyes, I may see
With your love, you set me free
Wishes can come true
Ya if you believe

"So, why are you here in an all boy's school while you should be in the girl's one?" Hamilton asked, stroking the back of her hand. "Remember when I told you I've been in six schools before getting here?" He nodded "Well, it's true I kept switching schools that many times in order to get my mother's attention, but that never worked" Jake said sincerely. Smiling knowingly, he questioned "so what kept you here, if she still hasn't noticed, then?"

"You really don't know my still presence here is all about?" She smiled back at him. "I guess it's all about me…"He wrinkled his brows. "Yes, just because…I love you, Hamilton" she confessed quietly, averting her gaze when his eyes met hers. Hamilton pulled her in towards him for another passionate kiss "I love you too Jake" He whispered, as he gently hugged her.

If you believe in love
Live out you dreams and make them true
If you believe in love
Through your eyes you help me see
With your love, you set me free
Wishes can come true
If you believe