With inspiration and writers block, and since I'm also at the part I've planned for months, it's easier and harder to write. The order spells come to mind is the order they are in the menu when selecting commands. I'm getting at the good parts now, and you should've seen the look on my face when I imagined your faces as you read the 'force-feeding' part. As for the rock part. . .

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"Ouch!" I cry out sharply, making as if to pick myself up. In a childlike display of integrity I look down, seeming to suddenly spot the stone. Twisting my face into one of slight pain I reach down and pull the stone from where it pokes into my costume, pausing to glance around and assure myself no costume damage was done, and THROW it hard into a narrow tree branch, hard enough to break it- and King Zidane just happens to be standing right underneath. Both the rock AND tree branch, which has a rope attached to a tent tied to it, fall on his head.

"WHAT THE HELL!?!?!?!?" He yells out, bending over and clutching his head in pain so fast that the branch, instead of rolling off his head onto his back, falls of and lands smack on his bottom. He stands up so fast the tent pegs shoot out of the ground, and the rock , which was in the middle of rolling down the back of his head, is propelled with slingshot force into rust bucket.

CLANGITYANGITYANGITYCLANGITYANGITYANGITYCLANGITYANGITYANGITYCLANGITYANGITYAN GITYCLANGITYANGITYANGITYCLANGITYANGITYANGITYCLANGITYANGITYANGITYCLANGITYANGI TYANGITY- CLANG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The rock bounces off his metal head hard enough to dent the armor again, causing him to clutch his head in agony, while the rock falls off and lands on his wrist before rolling to his elbow, falling off onto his knee, which he idiotically clutches in exactly the wrong place, shooting it onto his foot and having a reflexive kicking action occur that lodges the stone in his other leg. He bends over, cursing, to dig it out.

Smiling, I get up and walk over to Queen Garnet. "Happy?" She asks me through her giggles.

"Very." I reply, for once without lying. While I sit down and wait patiently, her giggles slowly subside.

"Did you plan that?" She asks me once she's stopped.

Before answering I turn around and look at the chaos I've created. Freya is trying to keep the tent from collapsing and having to be set up again while a deranged Pluto knight races around with the rope, trying to find a low branch sturdy enough to keep that from happening again. King Zidane is badly bruised and having Princess Eiko nurse his wounds; the rust bucket is running around screaming about his precious armor and the pain while looking everywhere, and I mean EVERYWHERE (Tomy smacked him) for a crowbar to remove the stone lodged in his knee. "No," I answer, turning to look at her again, "I just have luck for this stuff." She collapses into giggles again, and I resume watching the chaos.

The Pluto knight has decided the only thing close enough to the ground and sturdy enough to hold the rope is King Zidane's tail, and is following him around trying to get close enough for the slipknot he made out of the end to work. Zidane is running around trying to find the stream because Princess Eiko mistook hot sauce for disinfectant liquid. Eiko is chasing him with the REAL disinfectant liquid, but he doesn't trust her any more. Ruster has convinced Vivi to cast spells on his leg with the rock in it, hoping one will remove it. He's going through them in order of which one comes to mind, and has just completed Waterga. Zidane manages to get some of the water on his head, rinsing the hot sauce that dripped in his face out of his eyes, and makes a mad dash for the stream. He jumps in midair just as the Pluto knight manages to get the rope around his tail, and plunges into the stream pulling the Pluto knight, Freya, and the tent along with him. Eiko rushes into the stream and gets stuck in the mud on the bottom, resulting in her progress becoming very slow. Vivi is conferring with Steiner on which spell to do next, (he skipped doomsday, thank goodness). Beatrix is suffocating from laughing to hard. Translation: She's turning blue.

I look around, and a thought comes unbidden into my head: THIS is what a home should be like. With everyone able to laugh, and having a good time, not afraid to move, waiting to get permission for everything. It should be relaxed, with everyone liking one another, teasing, and yet liking each other. And it hits me: All uncle told us was a lie. A feeling I've never known before settles over me, yet I know it at once: Guilt.

That settles it. I must escape. Not to go away, but to give uncle what he deserves, and come back. And, lastly, explain to them who I really am.

How am I EVER going to convince Catalina I'm still sane?! I look at the scene without seeing it. There's no way in HELL she'll EVER believe I'm in my right mind after that food. But then again, I could argue that even if they ARE using that it doesn't take affect until age eleven, and so even if we're ten there's still a year to go. But they probably aren't even in any sinister plots. . .

"Gaia to Clara. Gaia to Clara. This is Garnet. Are you there, Clara?" I blink as a hand waves itself in front of my face.

"Yeah, I'm here." I mutter.

"Good. Now, this is the first letter." I turn to look at her. In the space she cleared in the dirt, she drew a triangle with the bottom moved to the center. "This is the letter A." She tells me, and hands me a stick. I copy the letter A while she recites examples of it being used. "Air, alphabet, ash, ache, all, are." She looks at my drawings. "That's what's known as a capital A. This," Here she takes a stick and draws a small circle with a line sticking out on one side, "is a lower case A. They have the sounds ah and a." She studies my drawings of the lower case A. "You're making them too round," She tells me critically. She draws another one. "See, on the side where it goes down it's flat." I study it and draw some correctly. She nods and smoothes out the dirt. "Next letter's B." She tells me, drawing a figure with a straight line on one side and two bumps on the other. I stare at it a few seconds, memorizing it, before copying it. "Beatrix, bee the animal which it looks a bit like, bell, bow, bow(action), bin, boil, bit. Makes the sound buh. It can also look like this," She proclaims, studying my B's and drawing one with a straight line that goes above the one hump. I copy some of those, and she wipes the space clean. She draws something that looks like a quarter moon. I stare at it. I've always liked the moon, lighting up the otherwise dark night. "That's the third letter, C. The lower case is a smaller version of it." I hurriedly begin to copy. "It stands for Clara," before she can go further, I look up and stare at her. She smiles. "It also stands for care, child, can, clown, chuck. It makes the sounds ssss and cuh." She tells me. Smiling, I bend over slightly and resume copying.

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For my sanity's sake I'll skip over her learning the other 23 letters. Did you get the little C joke? She cares about Clara, who is a child, can do lots of things, clowns around, and chuck is another word for throw. What? You don't care about my private ramblings? Fine. I'll shut my mouth.

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Tongue sticking out of the corner of my costumes mouth from concentration, I, with a slightly sloppy hand from being overlarge, carefully copy each of the twenty-six letters, tell her what each is called, and the sounds it they each can make. I look up. "Are you satisfied?" I snap, impatient to have a chance to think about a carefully planned escape. She smiles.

"Quite." Finally satisfied with me, she looks up, and I look around. Well, the rust bucket is half undressed while a few other knights use the tips of their swords to try and dig out the stone. King Zidane is being held down while Princess Eiko cleans his wounds, I decide not to comment on the fact that they're still in the river and every one of them looks as though they're half drowned. Vivi is sipping an ether; General Beatrix is spending quite a bit of time in a bush and keeps calling for large leaves. Freya is struggling to haul a soaking tent filled with water out of the stream, and Kat and Tomy are leaning against a tree nearby, talking.

"FWEEEEEEE!!!!!" I hear a sudden whistle, and my chain restrainers scramble to their feet. Turning around, I look at Garnet just as she lowers her fingers from her mouth. Tomy and Kat grab my chain, hanging on as Garnet struggles to untie the knot in the fading night. When she frees it they tug me to the center of the meadow. I almost don't mind as, within seconds, there's a crackling fire going. Feeling one of my pockets, I sigh, staring into the fire. If only I could sneak a few bites!

"What's in your pocket?" The sudden accusation has me spinning to the right to face- Zidane, looking worse for the wear.

"Nothing," I give the standard response.

"Liar." He sounds stern but amused. "Show what you have there."

"I already told you, nothing." I CAN'T SHOW HIM MY JERKY!!!!!!

"And I already know you're lying." Shit. "Empty your pockets." I empty the pocket with my flute in it. "The other one. Now, before I empty it myself."

"There's nothing there." I insist. He reaches over, obviously determined to empty it himself. I grab his arm. Some guards grab mine and Garnet pries my fingers away. I use my other hand. Eiko hangs on while Garnet pries my fingers away once more. I try to kick, only to realize that Freya and Rusty have my legs already. So, as his hand inches closer to my pocket, I respond the only possible way I can.

I lunge forward and bite, teeth clicking together where his arm was a second ago. A knight hauls my head back and places a sword in front of my neck in case I decide to try that again.

"Touchy touchy," remarks Zidane, easing his hand forward again. "It would have been easier if you'd shown us in the first place." He reaches his hand delicately into my pocket, removing it with a closed hand. He opens it, inspecting what's inside. "What IS this stuff?" He asks me, staring. I don't respond. All but the chainers let go of me, to inspect it.

"Some kind of string?" Inquires Garnet, taking a piece and stretching out the tough material.

"No." I respond with almost perfect honesty. It can be USED that way. . .

"A type of toy?" Guesses Princess Eiko, looking closely at the dull multicolored pieces.

"No," I say again.

"Some sort of cushion?" Suggests Freya, rolling some of the more tender pieces together.

Again, "No," I insist, "It's not used for any of those things.

"Well, then what IS it used for?" Finally asks King Zidane, thoroughly exasperated. He hands me a piece. I pop it in my mouth. "It's a type of food?" He asks me.

"Jerky." I tell them all. After some slight inspection Rusty pops a piece into his mouth. He spits it out immediately, a look of disgust on his face. "The flavors a bit strong," I warn him too late.

"You mean nasty," he coughs, obviously trying not to lose whatever's left in his stomach by then.

"It's better cooked." I tell him, and immediately the remaining pieces are placed at the very edge of the fire just long enough to warm up. This time the defect tries it.

"Not bad," He remarks, dishing out the remaining pieces to everyone but me evenly. Making a face, I reach once more into that pocket and bring out some more, discreetly putting the pieces into their food, spitting out what's been kept in my mouth, and putting more at the edge of the fire. A few minutes later I pop them into my mouth, declining their supper with the explanation of having eaten already. Immediately I am rushed into a tent.

Lying down in the strange sack they provide for warmth, I close my eyes and feign sleep. Ears alert, I hear the chain holders tie it to something, opening my eyes see dull shadows on either side of my tent. Obviously the guard shift will be changed many times tonight. I lie there and wait unmoving as the fire dies, as the guards change, as the royals sleep. Faintly I hear a dull snoring on my sides, and realize the jerky laced with rancid sleeping weed has taken effect. Rancid weed, while harder to eat, lasts longer. I have an hour.

Quickly and silently I slide out of the sack, sticking my pinky in the correct spot and pushing down, sliding out easily. Sliding the tangled mess back inside, I arrange it as though I'm curled slightly inside. It'll pass an inspection. I can't go out the front; doubtful they'll sleep through the alarms I know they've put there. Instead I dig into the soft dirt, quickly making a tunnel under the wall just big enough to squeeze through. I do so and fill up the hole afterwards. I slip out of camp, using my internal compass to head away from Alexandria, at an angle to the sea.

Now for the hard part. Leaning forward, praying I haven't gone too rusty, I run- slowly, at first, but rapidly gaining speed. Feet barely feathering the ground, at least a mile away from camp, I must cover at least ten more before I no longer risk detection. Pushing off strongly, still making almost no sound, I run, covering feet in seconds, narrowly jerking aside to avoid trees. I stop, look back, and am happy with the trail I'm not leaving. Turning around once more, sprinting for all I'm worth, I begin to cover the distance to the sea, fifteen miles away in forty-five minutes. And I must reach the edge of this forest and be over the mountain by dawn.

Leaping over a boulder, twisting to avoid a tree, something spots me, but I outrun it before seeing what it was. Somersaulting over a tree trunk, grabbing the branches above, I pull myself along, leaving no signs of my activity. Wondering whether or not to tear my costume apart and roam the area freely I decide against it: A costume of what they think I look like's distinct form in cloth would easily let them know I'm wearing one, that I'm not as I seem. That I never was.

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"Kuja."

"Yes?"

"Are you aware of what has happened to those brats you raised?"

"No, I'm not. What?"

"That girl is in custody now."

"They caught her, too?"

"No. She accepted help from a moogle when she was lost. That moogle turned her in."

"I thought I had it drummed into her that she can trust NO ONE."

"You did. She ignored it. You should've prepared them for being separated, Kuja. One makes mistakes when lonely."

"I never expected them to get separated."

"It was your job to prepare them for things unexpected. And I also bring news of little younger."

"Clara. What has the trusting soul done now?"

"She's escaped."

"Excellent."

"NOT excellent, Kuja. NOT. She has doubts. She's heading here to talk them over with you."

"Doubts? Impossible."

"As you said before, trusting souls are manipulated to further many causes."

"She worships me. There's no way-"

"Then the way that isn't there has happened. They've gained her trust. She plans to teach her manipulator a lesson before going back and telling them everything."

"And what do you suppose I do about her? I can't dispatch her after wasting so many years work."

"Last chance, Kuja. Second chance. You were told those two were at your disposal. Whoever said you had to use both?"

"Point taken. I'll treat her as soon as she gets here."

"Dispose of her."

"My youngest niece? Nonsense. By now my brother has gone sentimental about her. I can use her unconscious form to lure them into my trap."

"Tick tock, Kuja. Time is running out. For all that I'm immortal, I am not patient."

"I'll do my job. No one is going to stop me from delivering my side of the bargain."

"Sure you haven't gotten sentimental over the girls? That can ruin your prospect."

"I'll dispose of Clara after destroying the worlds heroes, you can be sure."

"And the older?"

"She'll be grief-stricken enough to believe me when I say the 'heroes' killed her. After she annihilates a few billion people, I dispose of her and finish the job myself."

"Excellent plan. And if she has contact with her sister before you kill either?"

"Then I kill them both and do it all myself. I am not yet above doing that."

"Good. Dismissed."

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YAHOO!!!! IT'S DONE DONE DONE DONE DONE DONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (celebrates) with nearly 3,000 words this could've been put up as 3 chapters, but I did it. FINALLY!!! Can anyone guess who the mystery person is? Well, I'm not telling (sticks out tongue) Now for a break!