Disclaimer: Still don't own them... don't own anything you'd want anyway!

CHAPTER 8

Harm's Hospital Room

George Washington University Hospital

Sunday, March 14th

1915 EDT

Mac's head rested on the side of Harm's bed, her fingers firmly entwined with his. She was sleeping. They lay in that state for hours. Harm, having never woken up, mercifully slept through the barrage of tests the doctors subjected him to before the surgery was done to set his broken leg. His ribs, though bruised, were thankfully not broken and although his concussion was bad, there were no skull fractures. He was likely to wake up after the effects of the anaesthesia wore off. Finally, Harm was admitted to a room. Other than his time in surgery, Mac never left his side. Hours later and emotionally drained, the day's events took their toll and she fell into an exhausted sleep.

The Admiral had received a call earlier in the afternoon from a very weary Bud and Harriet, alerting him to the Commander's condition. They too would have been at the hospital if they had not been up most the night at the hospital with little Jimmy and his ear infection. Admiral Chegwidden stood in the door way with his arms crossed. Even in their sleep he could see the affection the two officers shared. He crossed the sparsely furnished hospital room and placed a hand on Mac's shoulder.

"Colonel Mackenzie." the Admiral said gently shaking her shoulder.

"Mac.... Wake up Mac."

"Sir!" She exclaimed jumping to her feet.

"As you were Colonel"

"Sir, I meant to call you, but Harm was in surgery and then I...."

"Don't worry about it Colonel, Bud called me and told me what was going on. Is he going to be okay Mac?" the admiral said gently. He could see that she was exhausted.

"Yes sir. They said he would need a bit of rehab once the break healed, but he should heal completely." her words revealed more relief than intended, but she was well beyond the point of having energy to care.

The Admiral gave Mac a knowing glance.

"Colonel you should go home and get some rest."

"Sir, I need to stay with Harm, in case he wakes up."

"Colonel go home and get some sleep. Don't make me make it an order. You will go home and get at least 6 hours of sleep, a shower and a square meal before returning. I'll stay with Harm."

She sighed and resigned herself to the fact that she was not going to win a battle of the wills with the admiral in her current state.

"Yes sir." Beaten, she left the hospital.

Sarah Mackenzie's Apartment

Georgetown

Sunday, March 14th

2215

Mac idly walked around her apartment. It seemed so few hours ago that she and Harm were sitting on this very couch. She sank into it and took a deep breath. She could still smell his aftershave on one of the pillows. Inhaling deeply she finally let herself relax. It was in this relaxed state that the waking dreams would come. Her waking dreams were by far worse than anything her sleeping mind could conjure. It was as though she was reliving the very moments in which they had occurred. This particular dream haunted her often. Mostly it seemed, when she was under a lot of stress, but after Paraguay it had come more and more frequently.



In her dream she caught bits from here and there. Glimpses really. His life raft. A flashing beacon. The water swirling around him. The rescue plane passing him by. She was losing him. The muzzle flashing that get their attention. She realizes how close she had come to losing him forever. A few more minutes and he could have succumb to hypothermia, or been swallowed up by the sea forever. The dream morphs from the open sea to a lonely highway. She can see his car rolling over and over again. She sees his head striking the window. She feels his pain. Then perhaps in the most awful of dreams she returns to Paraguay. In this cruel scenario Webb has been secretly working for Sadik. He was working as a double agent, and motivated by his intense attraction to her, he woos her and takes her to Paraguay. Webb did it because Harm had a predictable reaction. Harm hadn't been invited to this party in Paraguay, but Webb knew that where Mac was, Harm was never far behind. Webb was always jealous of Harm, and here was his opportunity to rid himself of Rabb forever and take Sarah to be his own. Mac fought the dream the best she could, but here she was locked in the prison of the mind, with an unseen force controlling her. Her only hope of escape was to wake.

She gasped as the waking dream faded away and she returned to her apartment. She must tell him how she really feels. She must let down her guard and express her feelings to him. Things she never confided in anyone. Not Harriet, nor any other woman. A thing that had slipped out accidentally to Sturgis. She must tell him how much he has hurt her, so they could move beyond it. These are things she could no longer hold inside. Too often they had gotten in their own ways as much as each others... This time she was determined to have that talk with him no matter the cost.

Harm's Hospital Room

George Washington University Hospital

Monday, March 15th

0357 EDT

The Admiral sat in a chair near Harm's bed reading some of the work he had brought with him. He knew that in a few hours Mac would return to be by Harm's side, and he would go and open the office for the beginning of the week. He would break the news to the staff and the day would go on.

Admiral Chegwidden had been briefed by Harm's attending physician. Though his concussion had not originally appeared to be that serious, he had developed some brain swelling. It was not grave enough at this point to warrant an additional surgery, however it was enough for the doctors to keep him sedated while his body repaired the damage itself. The Admiral knew that Mac would not take this news lightly. He only hoped that she would return with a few hours of sleep and be in a better emotional state to take the news.

From where the Admiral sat Harm appeared to be stirring. He knew that it was impossible for Harm to wake up completely, but his mind silently urged him to keep fighting. AJ watched as Harm's breathing went from it's calm state, to one much more agitated. He was about to call the nurse, when Harm's breathing returned once again to normal. "He must be dreaming," the Admiral thought, and he could only imagine the dreams the man could be experiencing, locked in the prison of his injury racked mind

Harm's Hospital Room

George Washington University Hospital

Monday, March 15th

Same Time

It was that dream. That same dream that often haunted him. That uncontrollable thought that always started out the same... The same Christmas Eve the Navy officials had come to his home in San Diego sharing the news of his father's disappearance. From there it moved to Diane and the tumultuous relationship that he had shied away from briefly only to have her taken from him. Then his dreams came to Mac. To his Sarah. It was she that kept him afloat in the frigid Atlantic, that night all that time ago. He had gone down with the knowledge that he would be losing her to perhaps his greatest of enemies. That had been the sharpest blow to his ego. Not Renee leaving him for the mortician, or Diane's murder, but the possibility of losing his Sarah. His dream often took him on a journey through the years with Mac. Of all the arguments and close calls he had confronted with Mac, one stood out particularly strong:

"Okay, I'm hanging up now!"

"Mac!" he says, "where are you going?"

"I don't know..."

"Come to me."

"Why?"

"So we can talk."

"We already talked."

"Don't argue with me."

"I need a better reason."

"You know the reason............... Mac?"

"I'm here."

"I'm waiting."

The days following his crash at sea had been tempestuous at best. He tried so hard to connect with her only to have fate intervene once more when Renee's father died.

His dreams had begun to weave a recognizable pattern. One of loss and desperation before finally taking that fateful turn to Paraguay. It evoked the rawest of emotions, opening wounds that scarcely had time it seemed, to heal. In his dreams, he hadn't saved her. In his haste to reach her, he failed to notice another of Sadik's men come behind him capturing him during his most vulnerable moment. His dream always seemed so real. He could hear her cries for him. He could not save her and in perhaps the cruelest torture of all, he watched her die.

The Admiral regarded the unconscious Commander intently. Silent tears slipped down Harm's cheek. Tears that did not go unnoticed by AJ. "Hang in there Harm. Your morning will be here soon enough."

A/N: Thanks to ninjaturtle for keeping me honest with all that beta reading!