Living With Maniacs

Disclaimer: still don't own YGO. I'll own something someday though...oh, and apologies for any typos. One or two of you know firsthand just how evil my comp is.

Chapter 17- Ambushed

No sooner had this first ray of sunlight penetrated the group's field of vision; something came crashing through the window, pouring smoke into the room. A dark shape leaped through the window and faded into the smoke.

"He's here!" Marik said. "How did he find us so fast?"

"He used our shower earlier," Misty said.

"And you let- WOAH!" Marik lurched forward as though he had been hit by something, and he stumbled into a table and knocked off a vase.

"Ah!" Misty squeaked, leaping forward and catching it. "That is antiiiiiique!" She set the vase back and grabbed Marik by the shirt collar. Then she reached into the smoke and snatched Malik by the ear. She dragged them both, whining, out of the house and shoved them into the front yard. "Not in the house! And for God's sake, Malik, would you put a shirt on?"

Malik rubbed his ear and glared at her. "Hey, you better watch it! I'm feeling charitable towards you, but I wouldn't push it!" He smirked. "You know, I've got something of yours. You left it in the bathroom."

Misty narrowed her eyes. "Like what?" she asked slowly.

Malik reached into his pocket and pulled out what looked like a small piece of pink and red cloth. "Look at this…it is yours, isn't it?"

Misty slapped her hand over her mouth, then clenched her fists. "Why did you take that, you freak?"

Malik started waving it around, singing. "Let me see that tho-o-o-ong… Baybee! That thong thong thong thong thong!"

Misty glowered. "You give that back right now, you filthy little…"

"Nope!" Malik said, stuffing it back in his pocket. "I think I'll hang it up on the flagpole with a big ol' sign that says 'MISTY'S THONG.' Sound good?"

"Marik, why aren't' you trying to kill him?" Misty asked furiously.

Marik just stood there thoughtfully. "I have a thong just like that…"

"That's it." Misty stalked forward, bristling. "Give it back, now."

Malik did a little spin, kicked Marik over, then raced away laughing madly. "You'll have to catch me first!"

"Get back here!" she shrieked, taking off after him. Her cries brought Bakura and Ryou out of the house.

"Hey what's going on?" Ryou asked, watching Marik crawl to his feet.

"Where's Misty going?" Bakura asked, looking after her worriedly.

"After Malik," Marik muttered, rubbing his side where Malik had kicked him.

Bakura sped off after her. "Misty, wait! It's not safe!" he yelled after her.

"Hey, no fair!" Ryou yelled rather jealously; he was loath to give Bakura a chance alone with Misty. "Wait for me!" He hurried off after them.

Marik watched them go, then sighed. "So impatient, they overlooked the obvious. Now I'll have to save them." He retrieved the bag of weapons from inside the tank and strolled leisurely along in the direction of the three runaways.

Misty sped furiously after Malik, but he easily kept ahead of her. They ran through downtown Apache and began moving downhill towards the park. Malik somehow kept his footing on the steep road and only sped up, but Misty had to slow down a bit, and Bakura caught up to her.

"Misty," he panted. "What do you think you are doing?"

"Are you gonna help me catch him?" she asked him with a tone of threat in her voice.

Bakura's mouth twitched, struggling between his odd urge to protect Misty and the lure of a fun little manhunt. Well, he could hunt Malik and protect Misty at the same time. "Damn straight," he muttered. "But be careful."

"Whatever." They reached the bottom of the hill and sped up again. Malik was way ahead, cutting across the park.

"Wait!" came a cry from the top of the hill behind them. "Wait for me!"

They turned impatiently to see Ryou huffing down the hill. "Hurry up!" Misty called. Ryou promptly tripped and rolled down the hill, finally skidding to a painful halt in the loose gravel around the railroad tracks. "That was fast. Now come on." She yanked Ryou up by the arm and rushed forward once again. She saw Malik disappear into the tall dead grass at the end of the short dirt road just past the park. She gritted her teeth and raced across the park, ignoring the cries for help from Joey and Tristan (Joey was on the top of a swing set with a swing wrapped around him, Tristan was hog-tied to the merry-go-round).

They came to a halt in front of the tall grass Malik had disappeared into. Ryou was whining over his scratched face and bloody knees (since he was still in his British flag boxers), while Bakura was looking cautious.

"There's no telling what's beyond theses weeds, so we'll need to be careful and move slowly-"

"Nope," Mist interrupted, shoving past him and charging into the grass. "I know exactly what's back here." She began hopping nimbly down a steep, rocking slope; this was her terrain.

"Misty, wait!" Bakura said, hopping down behind her. "We still need to be careful!" Ryou followed them slowly, scooting down the rocks on his butt, whimpering.

"Why should we?" Misty said derisively, abandoning the rocks to balance across a pipe the thickness of a small tree trunk and elevated about ten feet above a rocking, shallow, and wide creek. "I know where I'm going."

"Obviously. But still, there's no sign of Malik, and no sign-" he started walking across the pipe as though he were on level ground "-is a bad sign."

Mist climbed up the slight incline at the other side, then turned at the top and folded her arms. "Fine. What do you suggest we do?"

"Well," Bakura said, stopping at the end of the pipe and looking up at her, "we really need to slow down and stick together. He'll have a harder time taking us down if we're in a group." He wiped the sweat off his forehead. It was early morning, but they were all burning up from the chase. "So let's wait for Ryou to catch up. They both looked back. Ryou wasn't even halfway across, straddling the pole and scooching slowly across, still whimpering.

"Hurry up Ryou!" Misty whined, stomping her foot impatiently.

"So- why are we chasing after Malik? Bakura asked, realizing he didn't know.

"He took something of mine," she said curtly.

"What?"

"None of your business."

Bakura folded his arms and looked at her rather reproachfully. "I am helping you catch him, you could at least let me know why it's so important."

"As I recall," Misty said in a dangerous voice, putting her hands on her hips, "I let you guys stay at my house when your apartment burned down, fed you when you were hungry, saved you from a guy who though you were a girl, babied you when you needed help, bandaged your stinkin' hand-"

"All right, all right! Sheesh!" Bakura said, raising his hands in defeat. "Calm down!"

Mist glared at him. "Besides, you don't have to help if you don't want to."

Bakura ignored this and turned to help up Ryou, who had finally made it across the pole. "Okay, let's get going again. Keep close together in case of an ambush." Misty huffed impatiently, but waited for the other two before charging off again. They followed her, showing a bit more caution than she. She walked along the ridge above the creek, kicked through some vines, skidded down a little dirt incline, hopped across a small extension of the creek, climbed up the other side, walked down a worn little path, ducked under the over hanging branches of a pine tree, and stepped over a collapsed barbed wire fence. Once over the fence, she turned to the others to see Bakura dragging a muddy Ryou up the little incline; Ryou had tripped in the tiny little creek extension. How annoying.

"Come on you guys!" Misty yelled at them impatiently. Ryou stood, and they jogged over to Misty. "You guys are so slow!" she said exasperatedly.

"It's Ryou, not me," Bakura said defensively. "And where are you going anyways? You don't know Malik went this way!"

"Very few people come this way," Misty said pointedly. "I'm guessing you didn't notice the fresh prints on the little dirt incline, these broken twigs on the pine tree, and this little bit of blood where Malik pricked his hand on the barded wire?" They gaped at her. She lifted an eyebrow, then turned around and pointed down a narrow path with a rocky, dirty wall to the right and a ten-foot drop to the creek (like a miniature red clay cliff) on the left. "And see the crushed weeds on the ground and the little trails on the dirt wall where he had his hands? He's been this way."

Bakura blinked, and the words What a woman! went through his head; he managed to say, "Well I- I guess you do know where you're going, so…keep going."

Misty rolled her eyes and continued down the path.

The little cliff extended about twenty feet, and at the end the path widened and a huge tree hung high over it. Misty stopped there and waited for Ryou to catch up. Bakura was right behind her. Once they had regrouped, Misty took a good look around.

"Where'd he go from here?" Bakura asked her.

Misty frowned. "I can't tell…something's not right though, I-" She leaped forward suddenly, and there was a sort of crack, creak, a swish, and "Woah!" Ryou and Bakura were tangled together in a net, dangling five feet above the ground. Insane crackling could be heard.

"I must admit, for a moment I was afraid your unexpected tracking skills might give me away and you would realize I purposely lured you here!"

Misty spun around uncertainly, searching. "Malik? Where are you? You better get your sorry self out here and give back what you took!"

Malik chuckled but stayed hidden. "No, I think I'll stay here for a little while. Actually, I'd be happy to give it back…"

"And what's the catch?" Misty asked, still looking around for where he could be hiding.

"You have two choices. Firstly, show me where you have the Millennium Rod hidden."

"How do you know I hid it?" Misty asked, desperately trying to spot him.

"Oh, come on. If you didn't have it hidden, my demented hikari would have all of you as mind slaves by now!"

"Well, forget it," Misty growled, still turning slowly. "What's the second choice?"

Malik chuckled. "Well, I'm sure you're quite aware of how beautiful you are. If you agree to come with me and…keep me company, I shall spare your friends."

"'Keep you company'? Malik, I know what you're thinking, you sick-"

"Make up your mind, unless you want me to take you by force and start a bonfire under your two friends!"

Misty stopped circling and folded her arms. "You wouldn't dare-"

"Misty, look out!" Bakura yelled, but a little too late; Malik leaped from out of the tree, landing behind Misty, dealing a hard blow to the side of her head and sending her sprawling. Then he turned to the two in the net.

"I was hoping she wouldn't come quietly so I could set you two on fire. I have all the kindling prepared." He retrieved a pile of brush and twigs from behind a tree and set it underneath the two netted halves. Bakura, whose face was smashed uncomfortably against the net, snarled at him.

"You let me out of this and I'll show you what a real man fights like! And don't you dare lay a hand on Misty, or you'll regret the day you were created, I'll make sure of that…"

As he rambled on, Malik knelt below him, carefully constructing the firewood. Unfortunately for him, he had his back to Misty, and she was not unconscious. As a matter of fact, she had found a big stick and was sneaking up behind Malik with a look of pure venom in her eyes.

Malik pulled a lighter out of his pocket and started the fire. Then he stood and smiled t Bakura. "Well, I'll be taking your woman now!" he turned just as Misty swung the huge stick, and with catlike reflexes ducked just in time. WHACK.

"Owoooo!" Bakura howled, receiving the brunt of the attack right in the forehead.

"Oh my God, I'm so sorry Bakura!" Misty cried, dropping the stick and running forward. Blood trickled slowly down his face.

"Damn, it's getting in my eyes!"

"Sorry, sorry, sorry!" Misty said, trying to wipe the blood out of his eyes.

WHACK. Misty fell to the ground, and there stood Malik, holding the stick she had dropped seconds earlier. "Well that was easy." He looked at the stick for a second, then shrugged and tossed into the growing fire. He then picked Misty up, slung her over his shoulder, and saluted Bakura. "Been nice fightin' with ya!" With that, he hopped over the edge of the cliff, skidded down it, and leaped clear across the creek.

"He got away, dammit! Ryou, help me out. Think you can chew threw these ropes?" There was a silence except for a little whimper. "Ryou, work with me here! We gotta get outta here!" Another whimper. "Ryou, what is the matter with you?"

"I have to pee."

Bakura groaned. "Give me a break Ryou, you-" He paused. "Wait a sec. How bad do you have to pee?"

"Really, really bad," Ryou whined. "I drank a gallon of water after I played in the hose yesterday."

"That's good Ryou, good," Bakura said. "D'you think you could put out the fire?"

"Bakura!" Ryou protested. "That's so gross!"

"Look," Bakura growled. "I don't know about you, but my ass is getting' real hot real fast. So either piss that fire out or roast to death and leave Misty in Malik's hands!"