RATING: PG

SUMMARY: Takes place about five months after Against All Odds. Shannon's past relationships have left her insecure, which may end up affecting her current relationship with Sayid. What will it take for her to realize that it might just be ok?

DISCLAIMER: I don't own the characters from Lost and am not making a profit. If they were mine, then there would be more Shayid moments.

Thanks everyone for such wonderful reviews, you guys are the greatest. Mrstater, its fun to write the angsty stuff, I think it will have to go on for a few more chapters, actually I know it will since the story is all planned out. Quistis, thank you for such a nice review. I don't plan on making Shannon slutty again, maybe in a future story. One chapter a day is my plan. Thanks, artistgirl727 I had a mental image of them kissing in a tree and remembered that song and had to add it in there. PITAchic, originally I was going to have Shannon leave to find Sayid to break up with him, but I didn't like that idea. SayidRocks, a self-fulfilling prophecy is exactly what has happened. Hopefully she will eventually start to see herself as Sayid does. Thanks again everyone!

Chapter Three – Not Coming Home Tonight

Slowly Shannon walked back to the beach, this was not a conversation she was looking forward to having. She was afraid that Sayid would finally realize what a nutcase she was and he would find someone else to share his tent with.

As she walked through the caves, she noticed people standing around whispering, which was unusual. Her first thought, was who died. Then her heart constricted as she realized that it was actually possible that someone had. She saw Sawyer standing off alone and she walked over to him.

"What's going on?"

"Hey, Sticks," he said, "Locke's disappeared."

Her eyes widened, "Really?" she paused, "What about Boone?"

"He went with your boyfriend to help find him a few hours ago," he started to say something else, but once he saw Kate he walked away.

She laughed softly as she thought about Boone and Sayid in the jungle together. She could picture the look of annoyance etched on Sayid's face. But then she realized that he said a few hours ago, she looked as the sun started to dip down below the horizon, she hadn't realized that she had been out there for so long. They shouldn't stay out that late with the mysteries of the jungle.

Shannon had to figure out what she wanted to do, if she wanted to wait for him at the caves or return to their tent. Looking around at everyone whispering she noticed that she didn't really know these people that well and figured that Sayid would be tired when he returned. Grabbing some fruit she made her way home.

Pulling back the tarp she was surprised to find a flower sitting on the pillow. She smiled as she picked it up, Sayid must have known that he could be gone for a while and wanted her to know that he was thinking of her. She brought it up to her nose and inhaled the fresh sent. She wished she could bottle it and wear it everyday.

She noticed that he had taken some of his things with him, more than he normally did when he went out into the jungle. She wondered then if there was something else that Sawyer hadn't told her. She yawned; she didn't have the energy to think about that now. Her own journey out into the jungle had exhausted her and she was ready to go to sleep. Her talk with Sayid would need to wait until morning.

She lay down on their bed and closed her eyes, hoping that sleep would claim her quickly. She turned over and realized how big the tent felt without him next to her. She then realized that this was the first time she hadn't slept with him beside her in months.

She turned onto her back; she was unable to fall asleep now. It was strange how she had grown so used to having him there that now she couldn't even sleep without him. She tried to pretend that he was there, his arm heavy against her waist, his breath tickling her face as the rise and fall of his chest lured her to sleep. She groaned; that just made her miss him more.

She wasn't used on depending on someone else like that. Before she would have been able to sleep anywhere, but now after having known what it felt like to be beside him, she couldn't. Sayid had a way of making her feel safe even when they weren't. She wondered then if it mattered that she was so screwed up, she didn't know what she would do without him.

Even as she thought about being dependent on him for safety, she realized that since being on this island she had been more independent then ever. Before Boone would have done everything for her or she would have found someone else to do what she needed like she had with Charlie. Sayid helped only when she asked, unless it was a dangerous situation, then he simply acted on instinct.

She shivered suddenly as if a cold wind had come out of nowhere. The tarp was closed and it didn't seem to be that windy out. She moved to pull out one of Sayid's shirts and held it close to her, hoping it would take away the sudden chill that resided in her heart.

Shannon was suddenly filled with a sense of dread. Tears filled her eyes as she thought that Sayid might not be coming home to her. She knew it was crazy, but she couldn't stop the thoughts.

With that in mind, she finally drifted off to sleep. She tossed and turned all night, dreams of Sayid dying haunting her. She never let go of his shirt.

TBC…