Disclaimer: Alas, this poor authoress doth not owneth YuGiOh nor the sometimes gallant Seto Kaiba. ::swoon::

Save Me From the Darkness

Chapter 9

"You don't look well, Ari," Dr. Saruka observed with concern.

"I haven't been sleeping well," Ari admitted as she tried to wipe the weariness from her eyes.

"Or eating, for that matter. You look a little on the thin side. So why haven't you been sleeping well?"

"Bad dreams, I guess." Understatement. They were nightmares, terrifying, never want to close your eyes again for the rest of your life, nightmares.

"I see," Kim frowned. "How long have these dreams been troubling you."

"About a week now, I think." Ever since…. Her hand fluttered to the necklace hidden beneath her shirt. She hadn't taken it off since the first day.

"Why haven't you told me about this sooner," she chastised gently.

Ari shrugged. "I thought they would go away, but they kept getting worse until El insisted that I start taking sedatives before bed."

"Has that helped?"

"Yes." Her hand fell to her lap.

Kim frowned thoughtfully. "Tell me about these dreams, Ari. What do you see?"

"Nothing really. Just suffocating darkness," she shivered as she remembered and Dr. Saruka's observant eyes didn't miss the reaction.

"Is there anyone in the dream with you?"

"No, I'm alone," she admitted. "But the darkness, it has a voice and hands like a man, but it's just darkness…" her voice faltered in exasperation and fear of remembrance began to seep into her eyes.

"It's okay, Ari. We don't have to talk about it if you don't want to."

Ari didn't want to. It was bad enough the terror sought her in her sleep, she didn't want to dwell on it when she was awake. True, the sedatives El gave her helped her sleep a deep dreamless sleep, but she felt drugged and woozy most of the next day because of them. Also she had a distinct feeling that something from her past was reaching out to her in these dreams, seeking her but uncertain because of the jewel she wore about her throat. The darkness, so cold and wicked, could not swallow her completely because of the jewel. But the jewel was not enough to keep it from trying and she feared its powers of protection were faltering.

She shivered again and pushed the memory to the back of her empty mind, resorting to simple chatter with the psychologist from then on.


Kim knocked respectfully on the open door before stepping into Kaiba's home office. He glanced up from his work long enough to motion her to a seat. A slight smile whispered across her lips as she crossed the room and seated herself, crossing her long legs out of habit. Even a career woman like her could not deny the attraction a handsome man like Seto Kaiba had, even if he was a little younger than herself. A small part of her wondered why he bothered to concern himself with an empty vessel like Ari when he could clearly have anything and anyone he wanted.

"How was she today, doctor," he asked finally as he pulled himself away from his work and turned those ever-cold eyes upon her.

"Not as well as I had hoped. She doesn't seem to be eating well. I attribute that to anxiety of course. However she admitted that she has been having nightmares for nearly a week and therefore does not sleep well either."

"Nightmares?"

"She didn't want to talk about it. The nurse has been giving her sedatives to help her sleep, which I advised her to continue. It is possible that since Ari has taken strides to control her fears in the waking hours, they may be seeking her out in her sleep. It is a very common occurrence."

"I see."

Kim stared at him for a moment. "It would seem you have not been sleeping well either, Mr. Kaiba."

"I'm a busy man and don't have time for the luxury," he stated flatly. "Thank you for the report, Dr. Saruka."

A very clear dismissal, which she did not hesitated to obey. "Good day, Mr. Kaiba," she threw over her shoulder as she left. Such a dismal man. He should become more concerned with what is in front of him then what is around him. It may effect a pleasant change.


There were only two place settings. Mokuba's was missing.

Where could he be? I haven't seen him all day, Ari wondered as she sat at her place and nervously eyed the other plate sitting at the head of the table, just one chair between them. She was making ready to run for the door when he came and she knew her window of opportunity had slammed shut.

Her eyes remained fixed on the china before her, her fingers knotting the napkin she had snatched for just such a reason. As was his custom, he offered no greeting, merely sat in his chair and stared at his newspaper as the kitchen staff bustled in and served dinner.

There is no way I can eat this, Ari thought as she stared at the plate she had been served. She knew it would scarcely pass her lips before her stomach would send it right back. Not exactly a spectacle she wanted to perform before him.

Kaiba glanced up from his paper warily to see her sitting just as she had when he arrived, stone still except her hands worrying the cloth napkin. It was clear she would make no effort to eat as long as he remained in her company. Had Mokuba been there, she at least would have picked at it.

His glance shifted to the empty seat and he shook his head. I knew it was a bad idea to let him go. I can't stand this anymore than she can!

"He is visiting a friend," he said softly, careful to keep his voice quiet enough that she would not jump out of her skin when he broke the silence.

Ari's fidgeting fingers froze when he spoke. Face my fears. Face my fears.

"Oh," she said simply.

"He will be back tomorrow," Kaiba added in hopes it might alleviate some of her stress.

"Okay."

With a silent sigh, he turned his attention back to the stock quotes, but the numbers just blurred together. Clearly his mind wanted to be elsewhere.

"Ari," he spoke finally as he set the paper down. From the way her head turned slightly, he knew she had followed the action out of the corner of her eye. "I want you to keep something in mind," he continued. She remained frozen, listening intently. It drove him crazy that she couldn't so much as look at him!

"You can ask me anything, Ari," he said finally. It wasn't exactly what he was intending to say, but it would have to do for the moment.

She made no reply and he didn't expect her to, so he turned his attention to his dinner and tried to force his unwilling stomach to accept Rory's delicious food.

"Th-there is one thing," her timid voice spoke and he looked up to find she still stared into her plate. At least she's talking.

"Yes?"

"The man with the green eyes," she spoke faintly so he had to strain to hear. "I think his name is S-Sojo."

"It is."

Again she fell silent and he wondered if she had the courage to finish what she had started.

"Who is he?"

Seto blinked, confused. Why would Sojo provoke curiosity in her?

When he said nothing, Ari ventured to look up and found him staring at her with faint confusion.

"I-I ask because I remember him from the hospital," she found herself saying.

A faint flicker of a smile whispered across his face, startling her more than his words ever could.

"He's your driver and bodyguard," Kaiba replied.

Curiosity overpowered anxiety and Ari turned her face fully towards him. "Bodyguard? Why do I have a bodyguard?"

"Protection, of course," he said and she half expected him to add the endearment, "silly" onto the end.

"Why do I need protection?"

"I have many enemies."

Ari frowned and stared down at her plate again. Mokuba had often mentioned his personal bodyguard, Washiro. Ari wasn't surprised the boy had one because he was a Kaiba after all and shared the Kaiba Corp empire. But…

Her words came slowly, thoughtfully. "Why would I need protection from your enemies?"

Because you're important to me, he wanted to say. More than anything he wanted to say it. "Because you are important to Kaiba Corp."

Ari met his stare and somehow had the feeling he was only telling her a half-truth. It was hard to tell when one looked into eyes that cold and unfeeling.

"What does Kaiba Corp do?" she asked much to his surprise.

"We manufacture state of the art gaming software and hardware."

"So what did I do at Kaiba Corp?"

He fell silent, much as Mokuba did when she asked a question directly relating to the memories she was missing.

"It's…complicated," he said simply.

"Was I a computer programmer?"

"Not exactly."

"Well, why did you hire me?" she asked and was immediately fixed with a chilling stare.

"Eat your dinner, Ari," he said sharply and she cringed, her gaze immediately dropping to her plate. She had asked too much.

Her hand shook slightly as she reached for her fork. I guess I can't ask him just anything after all.


She woke up with a start, sweat trickling down her back sending shivers along her spine. The darkness of her room warned the night was only half gone and she still had a long wait before the sun would rise to dispel the lurking shadows. Brushing a damp strand of hair away from her face, she cast a hopeful glance at the clock only to find it was just a few minutes before two.

I dare not go back to sleep. The dreams are waiting for me to do just that. Despite the fact that pieces of her memory seemed to be fighting for attention within those dreams, they had reached a point where she no longer had the courage to face them. The screams, the pain, the fear… It was her own fault for not taking the sedatives El had given her. What ever made her think she could handle it on her own?

Ari pushed the covers away and slid out of bed. Her bare feet snuggled into the soft carpet grateful for the confirmation of reality. All would be asleep, she knew. El, the staff, and of course, him. Mokuba was gone for the night, not that anything could wake him. He slept like the dead. Hesitantly, Ari pushed her door open and glanced into the empty hallway, gaining confidence from the perfect silence of the mansion. The mansion could be quite a maze in the dark of night but her feet took her down the stairs and through the halls as if they had taken the walk a hundred different times.

Everything was in pristine order in the kitchen and she was surprised to find the glasses in the first cupboard she looked in. Brushing the surprise aside, she filled it with water and nursed it slowly despite her nagging thirst. Anything to keep her from having to go back to that room, those dreams.

When the glass was empty, she reluctantly set it in the sink. Maybe there's a library I could borrow a book from to keep myself awake. I think I remember Mokuba leading me through one. With that she left the kitchen to expand her search and did not have to search long because just as her feet knew the way to the kitchen, they likewise knew the way to the library.

It was a large room and would have been extraordinarily dark had the drapes not been pulled back from the ceiling tall windows. Moonlight filtered in its luminance to give the room a cool refreshing silvery-blue glow that was desperately needed.

Ari felt drawn into the room, her eyes barely able to take in the massive selection of bound titles. Time seemed absent and she had no idea how long she lingered before she noticed the second presence. She was about to pull a book free from the endless shelves when she saw movement out of the corner of her eye. Instantly she froze, wondering if she had somehow fallen asleep again and was trapped in that imaginary world where she had no control. But the plush carpet beneath her feet reminded her that she was very much awake.

"Trouble sleeping?" his deep voice shattered the stillness and she felt her stomach jump.

"Yes," she returned softly as she turned to meet his unnerving gaze. Has he been there the whole time? Why did I not feel his cold eyes upon me?

At first he had thought he was hallucinating, when the silver-blue moonlight suddenly beget a wraith of beauty. As she hovered beside a shelf gazing up at the books, he realized she was indeed a wraith, the enchanting shade of the woman he loved. Her light blue silk pajamas had lent to the illusion and the inhuman hour had taken advantage of it.

For once he was permitted the chance to watch her without her cringing away from him with the adverse fear he had grown used to. She had been torn from him, and he felt as if pieces of his heart were being crushed each time she stood before him empty of feeling and knowledge, empty of love but bearing the face of it. It was a slow death he suffered.

Suddenly she froze and he knew he had been noticed so he ventured to break the silence. It was a credit to her character that she did not run for they were quite alone in the darkness. Instead she answered his question and turned to face him. Her body was tense, but something held her there despite her unease. Perhaps it was the reason that brought her out in the grave of the night, in search of something that would serve to keep her awake even longer.

"Nightmares?" he asked, knowing the answer and wondering if she would reply truthfully. The nurse had informed him that Ari was beginning to have violent nightmares on a consistent basis long before Dr. Saruka had brought it to his attention. The weariness showed in the young woman's face, a tell-tale sign of the battles she fought alone in her darkened mind.

"Yes," she admitted.

"Shall I wake the nurse?"

"No!" she cried suddenly and recognizing the obvious desperation in her own voice, dropped her head, her long hair falling in waves to hide her face. "Please, don't," she finished timidly.

Kaiba was startled by her forceful reaction. "She can give you something to help you sleep, Ari."

"I don't want it," she returned, still frozen to her place. When he remained silent, she offered an explanation, worried that he might force the issue.

"I don't like how they make me feel," she said.

"I see."

She looked up hesitantly to see him regarding her in a way she had never expected. Not once during the exchange had he made any movement toward her. His voice had been soft, almost warm in addressing her, completely absent of the harsh chill she had come to expect. In fact, there was nothing threatening about him at all in that moment. He wasn't going to wake the nurse and force her to take the sedatives that always left her feeling disconnected and helpless.

"Come here, Ari," he beckoned softly and without thought she obeyed, surprising them both. When she neared him, the fear reasserted itself and she stopped as if on command. Suddenly her wrist was caught and she found herself being pulled closer. At first she resisted, but he was insistent and she was afraid of what continued resistance might provoke him to do. So she let him pull her, reluctant but submissive, into his lap.

His arms wrapped around her and hugged her tightly as he rested his head on her chest just above her heart. Ari was startled by the unexpected action and forced herself to remain still and calm. No doubt her heart thundered for him to hear, but more than fear induced this reaction within her.

Seto Kaiba was weeping. No tears left his eyes to stain his cheeks and wet her shirt, but she could feel intense sorrow within his embrace. His mourning was internal, fierce and shattering as it was within all men too strong to break on the outside.

Ari felt a tear slide down her cheek for the man who held her, begging comfort in a way she was certain he never dared before. She draped her arm over his shoulder and curled her other around his head, her fingers grasping his thick hair as she hugged him firmly against her breast.

You've lost something important too, just like me. We're the same, aren't we?

There was no knowing how long they sat there, holding onto each other as though for a little while it could replace what they had lost. For the time, her fear was forgotten as she prayed that he found what comfort he was looking for in her. She knew what it was like to be without and even this man who evoked such strange feelings within her from intrigue to terror deserved this same comfort.

She felt his embrace loosen and confusion filtered through her as one arm pulled away but the other continued to grip her waist firmly. Suddenly warmth swept under her knees and he lifted her into his arms. Instinctively she tried to pull away but his hold was firm and she was helpless in his embrace as he strode into the hall and up the grand staircase.

Her hands gripped his shoulders fearfully and she forced herself to look into his face for an answer, but none was to be found. His sharp eyes were focused on a purpose known only to him.

Perhaps he means to take me back to my room. Yes, that must be…

The thought fled her as he strode past her door to two doors down. The bedroom was decorated in royal blue and mingled with the moonlight had a most magical feel to its atmosphere. The blankets on the large four poster canopy bed had already been turned down, but were too neat to have been slept in yet. Ari trembled as he carried her to the bed, his destination. With gentle care, he laid her among the soft sheets and only the look in his cerulean eyes kept her from struggling.

The sorrow she had felt within him had risen to the surface. What could bring such pain to a man as solid and strong as him? What did he lose? All her courage fled and with it the strength to flee herself.

He pulled the covers over them both and settled himself down into the softness of the bed in silence. Ari stared uncertainly at the canopy above, stiffening when an arm swept around her silk clad waist and pulled her back against human warmth. She was thoroughly caught in his embrace and all possibilities of escape had been effectively removed. Silently she cursed herself for allowing her defenses to be undermined by sympathy.

Kaiba breathed deeply of her scent and sighed to himself as he felt her slight trembling against him. In the morning the illusion would have faded and once again he would be forced to stare into fearful eyes. But for this night it was enough to hold her body against him and to believe for just a little while that she knew who held her.

Gradually she relaxed as she felt the calm breaths of her companion through the rise and fall of his chest against her back. Whatever torment had kept him awake so late into the night had been appeased. He had taken her into his bed only to hold her as he slept, nothing more. She did not want to sleep, certain the darkness and fear was waiting for her on the other edge of consciousness. But the peace he found lured her and soon she too drifted off into a quiet, dreamless slumber.


JadeGoddess- If I understand your question correctly, I think you may have the timeline a little confused. When she came home from the hospital after her accident, she didn't know anything about the necklace. Also, she was released to Kaiba's care and custody so she had no real choice in the matter about going home with him. As for the thought that the necklace belonged to someone else, it was a fleeting thought because naturally, she assumed something so wonderful could not be hers because she is a simple person and since she is not aware of her relationship with Kaiba, she is having trouble understanding why he would leave it in her room for her to find. Once she realizes that the necklace was hers (the memory/hallucination with the mirror scene) she begins to separate herself into two different people. You will notice this in later chapters because she starts referring to herself as Ari of before, and Ari of now. She does this because she feels as if the woman she was before were a totally different person, one she may never be again. Does all of that make sense?