Disclaimer: YuGiOh still isn't mine.
Face the Fear
Chapter 12
Seto Kaiba hovered hesitantly in the doorway. This is her sanctuary and I have forbidden every man from setting foot in her room. Dr. Saruka said it is vital that her refuge never be violated, even by me. Kaiba scowled fiercely. Forget that.
The nurse watched him warily as he entered the room and approached the listless woman curled up in the window seat, a blanket draped over her lap. Her head leaned against the cool window, seeing and not seeing the world outside. Soft golden brown waves feathered about her pale face and with the frosted glass behind her, she could have been a picture on a holiday card. Seto wanted nothing more than to hold her.
The moment he had set foot in the mansion, Sojo had been waiting. Kaiba didn't wait to hear the whole story, streaking up the stairs like a bolt of lightening. The answer to the most important question in his mind was right before him, in a state of dazed shock.
Seto kneeled cautiously beside her. "Ari," he spoke softly.
She started for a moment and then slowly turned to look at him. Her pale eyes were wide and her pupils dilated, but the moment they alighted on his face, her vision pulled into sharp focus.
"You're back," she murmured and blinked slowly to confirm that she wasn't seeing things.
Kaiba frowned and looked over at the nurse. "How long has she been like this?" he demanded.
"Since last night," El replied. "I've never seen her so hysterical before. Heavy sedation was necessary to prevent her from hurting herself."
Seto returned his gaze to Ari to find her eyes searching his face, her head resting back against the frame of the window seat as if she did not have the strength to hold it up on her own.
"Ari?"
Again she blinked slowly to maintain her focus and failed utterly. She was quickly sinking into a dazed stupor.
"When did you last give her a dose?" he asked the nurse without pulling his eyes away from Ari.
"Just a few minutes ago, sir."
I'm not going to get anything out of her in this state. With an irritated sigh, he stood and turned to leave. He took one step and his hand was caught. Startled, he glanced down at the slender fingers grasping his. Instantly, her grip slackened and her hand fell away.
"I," she blinked a few times and desperately grasped a moment of clarity. "I don't want to be afraid anymore," she whispered as she gazed up at him.
He couldn't contain himself and reached out to tenderly stroke her cheek. Her gaze never wavered and not a tremble shook her and he tried to convince himself it was more than the drugs that gave her this strength.
Finally he turned from her and fixed the nurse with an icy glare. "No more drugs."
"But what if—"
"No," he snapped. "No more crutches. It's time she faces her fears. Have I made myself clear?"
El nodded stiffly. "Yes, Mr. Kaiba."
I'll deal with the consequences, he assured himself as he strode out of the room to find Sojo patiently waiting for him.
"Tell me exactly what happened," Kaiba growled.
"The intruder claimed to be a freelance reporter by the name of Ito Nozaki. He insisted that he only wanted an interview with Ms Nieche, but I suspect this was a cover for something more. His background information checks out but I don't know any reporters who can evade both guards and security cameras as effectively as he did. No one saw him enter the grounds and a thorough review of the camera footage likewise offers nothing."
"He knew exactly when and how to act," Kaiba spoke thoughtfully. "What did he say to her?"
"I don't know, sir. Ms Nieche was already quite panicked when I arrived and Nurse Jiura has kept her under sedation ever since. Neither could I 'coax' anymore details from Nozaki. He was a very stubborn man."
Kaiba scowled fiercely. "I want every man on the grounds and at Kaiba Corp to know what this man looks like should he try to pay her another visit. Where is he now?"
"Most likely at Domino Hospital having his injuries cared for, sir," Sojo said without expression.
A knowing smirk played across Kaiba's lips. "Good."
"Nurse Jiura told me that you have forbidden her to give Ari anymore sedatives," Dr. Kim Saruka stated.
"I did," Kaiba returned without looking up from his desk. "Is there a problem with that?"
"I think there is, especially so soon after this recent traumatic incident. Ari's psyche is in a very fragile state right now and those sedatives are all that keep her from slipping over the edge. Her experiences have been traumatizing enough without her having to relive them each night in her dreams. As her doctor, I do not approve of your decision at all. It will only serve to endanger her more."
"Your opinion has been dully noted," Kaiba murmured.
Kim frowned deeply. "Mr. Kaiba, I am certain that this has been a very difficult time for you, being parted so cruelly from someone you care about. But your feelings are as dangerous to Ari's recovery as the attack that occurred the other night. If you think that you will be able to provide the pacifying comfort she needs in place of those drugs, you are sadly mistaken."
Icy blue eyes turned up to look at her. "Despite what your professional observation has led you to believe, Dr. Saruka, this was not my decision."
"Then pray tell, whose was it," she demanded.
"Hers."
Kim stared at him silently for a moment. "I do not believe Ari is capable of making such decisions considering her present state of mind," she finally said.
His stare was unflinching. "The fact that she has made such a decision tells me that she is. My orders stand."
The woman sighed wearily and stood from her chair. "Very well. But be forewarned, Mr. Kaiba. The repercussions of your actions may prevent Ari from ever recovering as we had hoped."
"Again, your opinion is dully noted, Doctor."
His icy glare followed her exit from the office, never flinching, never hesitating. Ari's words echoed through his mind like an endless chant. I don't want to be afraid anymore. He could not back down now, no matter the consequences. It had been his Ari, the one he had fallen in love with, who had reached through the haze of fear and drugs to make this plea. The woman strong enough to fight for what she wanted was struggling to break the frightened shell that confined her.
I'm not going to let her fight on her own anymore.
Ari gingerly traced her fingers over the dark bruises. There were four on the inside of her arm, one on the outside, the perfect impression of a hand print. At present, El was knocking on the bathroom door asking her if she was okay because she had been in for almost two hours.
The memories were severely clouded by panic and fear, but she remembered his words. He had suggested that Seto Kaiba was at fault for her accident and her loss of memory, that the man knew something was wrong and allowed her to go through with the test anyway.
What was I testing? Kaiba Corp designs and manufactures gaming software and hardware. Maybe I was testing a new piece of hardware, but what kind of gaming hardware could possibly injure a person so badly? That reporter, I think he knew more than he was telling.
With a sigh, she rolled her sleeve down over the bruises and proceeded to brush her hair. It was a welcomed change to be able to think clearly again, but at what price? The nightmares hovered, waiting for her, always the threat in the darkness, a threat of death and more. The jewel she always wore could no longer protect her. So desperate had she been, that she had asked El for a sedative if only to chase the darkness away.
El gave her a funny look, and refused.
"Mr. Kaiba has forbidden me to give you anymore sedatives. He said you must learn to face your fears," the nurse had told her and by her expression, Ari was certain the man had been stern and formidable.
Face my fears. So she tried, with a strange sense of determination she had never felt before, but it wasn't enough. There was nothing to protect her from the voices in the night or the icy hands that clawed at her. So real had it been that when she discovered the bruises on her arm, she had believed them a manifestation of her dreams.
He had taken away her only solace, her only weapon against the panic. Why? If he were considerate enough of her state of anxiety to excuse her from dinner, then why inflict this… this torture upon her?
"Ari, are you all right in there? Please, answer me!"
With a sigh, Ari set her brush down and reached for the door. "I was just thinking," she murmured as she limped past the startled nurse.
"Well, you could have answered me. I was really starting to worry!"
Ari shrugged as she climbed into bed and laid back to stare up at the canopy indifferently. This night is going to be just like the one before, and the one before that.
"Do you want me to stay with you until you fall asleep, Ari?" El asked hesitantly.
"Please," Ari whispered. El sat on the side of the bed and cradled Ari's hand in hers.
"Just think about good things, Ari," she murmured softly. "Like snow, flowers, kittens…" Her voice was soothing and Ari tried to focus on the images her words brought to mind. Perhaps tonight will be different after all…
"Let go, Ari."
"No!" she cried bitterly. "I can't, I won't, I…" her fingers were slipping, pain searing through her hands. It would be so easy to let go. It would end everything. Her fingers uncurled and she gave herself to the dark void, falling endlessly, falling…
Her head cracked sharply on the floor and her eyes flared open to stare at the familiarity of her shadowed room. A painful moan seeped from her lips as she rubbed her tender head and glanced up at the clock on the nightstand above her. Too many hours before dawn still. With weary reluctance, she pulled herself up and stared at her bed, the covers pulled and bunched as if an army of children had declared war amid the blankets. It was a war, one she could not escape from. It had been good fortune that she had fallen from bed because she dreaded what awaited her in the darkness. This had been the first time she had surrendered to it.
I cannot go back there. But even as she thought it, weariness tugged at her eyes. She would not be able to keep herself awake for very long, and the darkness would be waiting to finish what it had started the moment she gave in to sleep again.
I just can't face another night like this! She sunk to her knees and wept. Why won't El just give me drugs? Because of him! Her teeth clenched angrily. He doesn't care how I suffer! He doesn't care… even as she thought it, she knew in her heart it wasn't true. Words could not shake the vision of sorrow she had once seen behind the ice, felt in his desperate embrace. We are the same.
Shakily, she pushed herself to her feet. There was only one night when the dreams could not reach her because something stronger than sedatives protected her.
The silence of the mansion threatened to unnerve her, but she was desperate and desperation lends unshakable strength. Have I lost my mind, she wondered as she gently cracked the door to peer into the darkened room. No. I fear losing it and that is why I am here. I will leave before he wakes in the morning so he will never know.
With this decided, she softly closed the door behind her and crept to the side of the bed. Faint moonlight drifted through the window to soften his handsome features. He looked so peaceful and she longed for that peace that so effectively evaded her.
Is it wrong of me to want this, to want just a few hours of freedom from everything that haunts me?
Not once did he stir as she shyly crawled under the covers and snuggle down into the softness of the bed, as far from him as she could get without falling off the edge. I must wake before him, she reminded herself as she allowed sleep to take her, no longer afraid because he was near, this man she trusted when she knew she shouldn't.
Kaiba lay awake long after she had fallen asleep, listening contentedly to her soft easy breaths. He knew why she had come, and for that had done his best to feign sleep that he might not scare her away. Even now he feared moving lest he should wake her. The nightmares must have been especially bad and without the sedatives to shield her, he knew she would be forced to face them. He hadn't quite expected this to be her choice, though.
Carefully turning on his side, he stared at her curled up like a child nearly on the edge of the bed afraid to take up anymore space then necessary. He smirked at her ever-surprising innocence. She murmured something unintelligible and he knew there was little chance of waking her now that she had once again fallen into her dreams.
With tender care, he pulled her away from the edge of the bed and to his surprise, she rolled on her own to face him. Her features were set in sweet slumber and he brushed her long hair away from her face.
"Tell me what I have to do," he sighed sadly, "To make you remember that I love you."
Nights Child- Actually I'm not very fond of 'convenient' occurrences in my stories. I like everything to flow so smoothly that my readers think "it could not have happened any other way." But the fire was necessary because I needed to get Kaiba out of the house.
