After the weekend with the Stablers, I find myself at work again. Dinner with Maureen's boyfriend was interesting. Elliot wasn't the overprotective, interrogating father that I'd always thought he'd be when his little girl brought home a guy.
It's the middle of the day and I'm buried in paperwork. Munch and Fin are bickering, over in their corner. Soon, I'm going to bounce a paper ball off the back of Munch's head and earn myself a glare. Cragen steps out from his office and goes to the fax - he's expecting something. On his way back to disappear into his office, again, he stops and looks at the bickering pair across the room from me. "Will you two give it break? Just for one day? For the rest of us and our sanity?"
"Actually, Cap, I find this works better." I crumple up a spare sheet of paper and send it sailing through the air to bounce off the back of John's head. Munch turns around and gives me his classic over-the-glasses look. "Ha."
I roll my eyes and turn back to paperwork. "I'll do it again, Munch, if you start rambling about some Federal conspiracy. What was it earlier? You think that the Kennedy assassination was some sort of set-up?"
"It was." He begins, turning around fully to look at me. "The government"-
"And Elvis is alive. I don't wanna hear it. To me, Kennedy was killed by a nut case with a gun, in Dallas. Not by some crazy government conspiracy."
"That's what they want you to believe." Munch removes his glasses.
"Seriously, drop the conspiracy theory crap. If you really think the government is out to kill us, move to another country, already. Maybe it'll keep us all sane. Why don't you just cross the border and leave the rest of us alone?"
"Someday you'll wish you'd listened to me." Munch turns back to his desk, finally.
Cragen sighs. "Can I see you two for a second?"
"What'd you do this time, Stabler?" I ask, jokingly, as we step into the boss's office and sit. Elliot glares at me and shakes his head.
"What's going on, Cap?" I resist the urge to cross my fingers. Cragen's been a cop for hell knows who long - at least thirty years. I should have known we couldn't keep a secret from him for long.
"I know." He says, simply. "I know you two are involved. You're dating."
Elliot stares at me, floored, his blue eyes asking me 'what the hell! Did you tell him?'
"Don't insult me by trying to keep a secret from me again. I don't care about anything else. I don't wanna know. As long as it happens off the job, it's none of my business. As long as you keep things professional around here, I don't care what you do. Just don't try to date each other and keep it a secret right under my nose. It's an insult."
"I"- I stare at him, shocked.
"There's no rules against it. It's just never happened on my watch." He shrugs and leans his elbows on his desk, the expression on his old, basset-hound face turning from boss to father figure. "Like I said. As long as it happens off the clock, I don't care."
I shake my head, slowly, too stunned for words.
"Get outta here and get back to work. What are you waiting for?"
Elliot gets up, first and I follow.
"Olivia." Cragen stops me as I move to step out the door. "If he hurts you, send him to me."
I grin. I'd hug him, but he wouldn't like that. "El, you hear that?" I poke my partner in the ribs.
Elliot turns back to me. "I heard it, Liv. Loud and clear."
"Good. Now get lost, Stabler."
"You gonna tell me to get lost, too?" I raise an eyebrow as Elliot shuts the office door behind him.
"No. C'mere for a minute." Cragen gets up from behind his desk and steps toward me. "He's a good man, Olivia. You'll ground him. Calm him down. Help him work through some of this crap."
"You're not"-
He shakes his head. "I half-expected this from day one. You two clicked. Faster than most new pairs do. You get a new team, especially where you were a rookie, there's this really weird and annoying I-don't-like-you-get-the-hell-outta-my-face period. And he's not the easiest guy to get along with. But you clicked. I knew he was married, so it stopped anything from happening. But when Scarry brought it out, I half-expected this to happen."
"I didn't like him. I wanted him to get the hell outta my face." I reply. "But I don't know why we clicked."
"Because you can calm him down before he throws a punch. And he learned from you, how to handle some of the victims - be sympathetic and be a cop at the same time. He's not gonna hurt you - he's a stand-up guy. As your boss, you know, I don't want it happening here. But off the clock, I'm glad to see you happy."
I grin. "I'd hug you, but you wouldn't like that, would you?"
"Benson, you know you're like a daughter to me. Like any father, I wanna see you happy. I kinda watched you grow up. But here. You've changed, since you came up here. Not every case really hits home. You don't take 'em all personally."
I sigh. "They all hit home."
"But you don't take 'em all personally. You think like a cop. Not a victim. You don't let whatever you're feeling come out, anymore. You're not as emotional."
"Sometimes I wonder if that's a good thing or a bad thing." I lean against the wall. "I mean, am I becoming so sensitized to this crap that I don't feel anything anymore?"
"You still feel it. I know you do. But you keep a grip on it. Someone doesn't have to be behind you to drag you off a perp."
"You think so, Dad?" I grin at him, joking, and he gives me a rare smile. "I know. I don't think you've changed. I know you've changed. You're still the same stubborn hardass you were when you first walked in here, though."
"What do you mean?" I glance at him, confused.
"You're stubborn, Benson. No two ways around it. You'll bounce off walls till you get what you want. When you came up here, you were stubborn, you'd seen some action, and you were tough. What I needed in the squad. A woman, who'd be strong enough to stick it out. I've seen a lot of detectives since they put me in this office - a lot of them get burned out or they quit. A lot of people in your position would have quit by now."
"I don't quit."
"I know you don't." Cragen looks out his office window. "I think Munch and Fin are at it again. What's it gonna take to shut them up? A reprimand?"
"No. Then Munch would just start bitching about how you're trampling on his First Amendment right to free speech. I think another paper ball to the back of his head would work fine, though." I grin.
"Go for it. Get back to work."
I turn to leave and he stops me again. "Liv?"
"Yeah?"
"If you marry him - not saying that I'm expecting anything to happen - but if you do, do you have anyone to walk you down the aisle? I know you have some family"-
I grin. "We've got a long way to go, yet, boss. But I don't have anyone, really. I'd be honored, if you would give me away."
"I'd do it in a second. I told you, you're like a daughter to me. So don't do anything crazy. Like elope and take off to Vegas with him. I need you two around here."
I laugh, quietly. "Vegas? Nah. Manhattan's just fine with me, Cap."
