1(Disclaimer: I do not own Law & Order: Special Victims Unit. The show, the characters, etc., all belong to that creative genius, Dick Wolf and that big corporation called NBC. Don't sue me!)

(Summary: A missing scene from 'Escape' that popped into my head after watching the episode for about the ninth time. What happened between the end of the hostage situation and Liv and Andy winding up at the hospital?)

(A/n: I know that almost everyone thinks that Andy's a jerk. I agree with you. But I got the season five DVDs for Christmas and 'Escape' happens to be one of my favorite episodes in that season. And this idea had to be written. So if you want to get mad at someone, get mad at my muse and Dick Wolf for leaving us with gaps in episodes that have to be filled!)

She climbs into the passenger side of the big, black SUV, slamming the door closed. I don't plan to say anything about what just happened. She'll deal with it, herself. I don't know why she's riding with me, but she's here.

My beautiful, charming and sometimes frustratingly stubborn ex-lover pulls the seatbelt over her shoulder and fumbles to get it hooked. I hear the metal hit plastic and look at her, startled. Her hands are shaking. Baxter was on the border of being a nutcase and she knows it. She didn't know what would have set him off or what would have made him start shooting. It could be her or Lee in the back of that ambulance, right now, instead of him. One or both of them could also be in a body bag, on the floor of that room.

"Easy, Liv." I reach over to help her out, steady her hand and make sure she's buckled in. "That was something, the way you tried to connect with him." I remark, and I mean it. I know she must have been terrified, but she didn't show him how scared she was. She kept calm enough to try and negotiate with him, even though he had a gun and had threatened to kill them both.

Olivia attempts to smile at me, but those dark pools a man could drown in are still wide, from adrenaline and fear. She was prepared for any possible situation, in there. If Baxter had snapped, she probably would have jumped at him, for the gun. If he'd fired, she would have forced Lee down flat, willing to take the shot herself. I can understand the adrenaline, because the situation was so damned tense, in that hotel room. "See? I am good for more than 'babysitting victims.'"

She's still got it, even after one of the most terrifying situations a cop can be in. Her attitude, her spunk and a little bit of sarcasm I think has rubbed off from the ever-sarcastic Detective Munch, who I know she's spent a lot of overtime with. But did I say that? Damn it. I can be such an idiot, sometimes. I did say that, when we were arguing, after talking to Baxter's mother, Sheila.

I look at her. "You know I didn't mean that."

Olivia shrugs and slumps back against the seat, drained. "Nice ride." She comments, eyes closed, her voice soft.

"Are you kidding? This isn't mine. Here." I come up with a bottle of water, handing it to her. She takes it, but her hands are so unsteady that it splashes over her thigh. Olivia glances in my direction, embarrassed.

"Hey." I reach forward and pat her knee, tentatively. "It's okay." I steady her hands and she swallows most of the water. "You're human, Liv."

She sets the bottle down on her knee and looks at me. "Andy?"

"Yeah?"

"For once in your life, shut your mouth."

That wasn't good. I know she's running high on adrenaline, but I think I just pissed her off. Women. What doesn't piss them off?

"Liv"- I decide to try and talk to her.

She glares at me. "Don't even start. Don't give me the 'you should have waited for backup' speech or the 'what the hell were you doing?' one either, okay? I don't want to hear it."

"No. You're a big girl - you don't need a lecture. You know what I will do?"

Olivia raises an eyebrow, in a silent question.

"Make a recommendation to Captain Cragen that he put in for a bravery citation."

"Andy, no." She shakes her head. She's a good cop, but she's modest as hell.

"Why not?"

"Elliot's a lot like you - can't keep his mouth shut. He probably told Cragen about us."

"So? That's history, Olivia."

"Still. Your recommendation - oh, hell. Why do I bother? No one can understand Cragen till you actually work under the guy for a while."

She doesn't say anything more after that. She closes her eyes, leaning back against the seat. I find the key and put it in the ignition. I'm about to turn the engine on, pull away from this crappy motel and get us to the hospital to see if that son of a bitch Baxter is going to live, when I see the tear slipping down between her lashes. Olivia tries to hide it, with a hand over her face.

"Hey, hey, hey." I shift my position in the seat, turning to her. "It's okay. C'mere." I reach down, unhook the seatbelt and pull her into my arms, unconsciously rubbing my hand down her back. Olivia instinctively buries her face in my chest and I can feel her breathing, feel the pulse in her neck - it's still hammering, hard. I let my hand stray into her hair - it's still soft, silky, the way I remember.

She's not crying. Then I understand. She's just been through hell and she was entitled that one tear. She needs to sleep. When the adrenaline rush ends, she'll be exhausted and drained. But if I know her, she won't sleep until we close the case.

"You know, Fin and I could close this. I think Cragen would be more than understanding, if you want to go back to the city, get some rest. And if he wasn't, I could persuade him. You've been working this one for days, working late, probably not sleeping. You've done your part."

She shakes her head, quivering. "You've been working as hard as I have."

"When the rush ends, trust me, you'll be wiped out." I murmur, stroking her short hair. "I know, remember? You should be home, in bed." I hold her closer, confused by my own concern.

"I can't just walk away from this, Andy. That's the thing with SVU cases. You can't walk away from 'em." She whispers, her nose buried in my chest.

I hold her, content to have my arms wrapped around her again. I can't believe I shared my life with this woman for nearly a year and a half, then I just walked away. She's beautiful. Even more so, now, with the way she's wearing her hair - it softens her, a little. She cried, when I left her - that was one of the few times I think anyone has ever seen tears running down Olivia Benson's face.

She's shivering, in my arms. "Cold?" I question, running my hands over her back, in a steady rhythm. God, this reminds me of her mother's funeral. We weren't dating then - I'd left, six months before, but when Serena died, I went back to be there with her. She didn't have anyone else. Stabler was there, but I knew she wasn't going to run to him. So after they buried Serena, I followed her out to her car.

When she realized it was me on her heels, Olivia yelled at me, came close to hitting me. She was still pissed about our breakup. But then, we wound up sitting on the hood of her car together, me holding her as she broke down. The people who'd attended her mother's funeral had been mostly friends of hers from the Department - she didn't want to be a crying mess in front of them. Especially since it was common knowledge she and the old lady didn't get along that well.

Suddenly, Olivia pulls back from my arms, looking at me. "Andy, I'm sorry. I, uh"-

"Shh. You've got every right in the world, Liv." I want to kiss her forehead, but that could lead to something else.

"I should be pulling my weight. But what am I doing? Turning into a shaking wreck." She leans her head against the window, staring at something or other.

I reach out, touching her shoulder. "You've done more than pull your weight. I know said some stupid things, I know I was a jerk - forgive me?"

"Maybe." I hear the barest hint of a smile in her voice. She's joking.

"Believe me. Without you, that could have turned out a lot worse. You shut Lee up and you had a connection going with Baxter. If it had been someone else in there". . . .

She interrupts me, shaking her head. "I had the gun out of his hand when you gave your sniper the green light. He was ready to give up, Andy. Talking to Caryn and Danny - it had started to calm him down."

I sigh. "I did what I had to do."

She ignores me, stubbornly. When Cragen, Fin and I walked into that hotel room, to check on her and Lee, leaving Baxter for the paramedics who were on standby outside, she was still breathing deeply, almost panting. Fin draped his arm over her shoulders, like a protective older brother and Cragen stopped to grip her shoulder. I realized that she sees those guys, the ones she works with, like a family. I just kind of stayed off to one side. I didn't want to approach her just then.

"Liv?"

"Hm?" She decides to answer me, even though she sounds uninterested, bored, even.

I gently cup her face in my hand and make her turn around. She hisses, softly, when I grip her arm. That son of a bitch Baxter probably bruised her when he grabbed her, when he tried to force her out the door. I push up her sleeve, revealing her arm. Fresh bruises are forming, on her upper arm, above her elbow and on her forearm, just below the joint. Olivia turns a pale pink, embarrassed that she made a sound and pushes her sleeve back down.

"Andy, let me go." She looks me in the eye, challenging me. Not at all what I was hoping for. I lean in and kiss her forehead, softly, tempted to kiss her, even though I don't have the right to. She's not mine. She hasn't been for a while. I feel her answering shiver to my gesture and look back into her eyes. I rattled her a little.

She looks at me, nervously, almost shy. I lean in again, so close to claiming her lips with mine. I hear her gasp, feel her shudder, but if she wanted me to stop, she'd let me know. I close the gap, just about to brush her lips with mine, when she braces herself against my chest and pushes me away. "No. Oh, hell, no. Not here." Olivia shifts over, as far as she can, away from me and won't look at me.

"Liv, don't do this. I know I hurt you. . . . "

"Damn right." She replies, throwing me a dirty look. "We're on the job, Andy."

"Later?" I embarrassed her. She doesn't want to be caught, kissing me by someone she works with.

"No. I must have told you a thousand times, it's not going to work. So forget this happened."

I reach out to touch her and she stiffens. "Don't." There are tears shining in her eyes, again.

I sigh, as she stares out the window, not even acknowledging I exist. That wasn't supposed to happen. I crank the key in the ignition and we ride in silence to the hospital.

(A/n: (Tentatively crawls out from corner.) You're not gonna throw anything at me for writing a fic in the POV of a character that we all hate? At least I hope not. Click that little purplish-blue box and let me know what you think!)