Title: Better than Presents (but Not by Much)

Series: Static Shock

Rating: PG-ish, for use of the word "shitload." Oh, and gay marriage or whatever.

Summary: Obviously, when I said gay marriage I was talking in code for "everyone goes and gets free ice cream." Except, you know, not.

Notes: You see how Static Shock does not belong to me? Yeah, how about that. Neither does anyone else I mention. Also, expanded version of drabble found at I do. And if you have to ask the pairing...well, you've obviously never watched the show, have you? Also, fluff alert. I'm turning into a sap in my old age.

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The church had seldom been as packed as it was that day. Hundreds of invited guests in addition to general well-wishers filled it to capacity. Teal and bright blue decorations and white flowers adorned everything, making the hall feel bright as well as ceremonial.

Two heads-one blond, one with black hair in dreads-peaked out from behind a door, taking in everything and everyone. They were wearing matching tuxedos. They both stared owl-eyed at the throng of people waiting on…well, them.

"There must be a thousand people here," the darker man said.

A quick headcount was performed. "Actually, it's more like 748…wait, sorry, 749. Bart just arrived."

"Whatever." A dark hand was waved dismissively. "Point being, it's a shitload of people."

"Yup, a shitload." Richie straightened his glasses. "I think I'm gonna be sick."

"Oh, now, that's romantic." Virgil rolled his eyes, trying to think of a way to take his soon-to-be-husband's mind off of his nerves. "You know what I like best about today?"

"How awesome we look?"

"Dude, we look awesome everyday. Guess again."

"That the open bar at the reception guarantees Sharon'll be lit up in ten minutes or less?"

"No…although that is going to be fun."

"That the League's here and J'onn looks uncomfortable as all hell in a tux?"

"Nope. Try again."

"The presents, right? It's totally gotta be the presents. I mean, I'm pretty sure that's my favourite part."

"Okay, stop. Seriously, just stop. You're killing me here because, frankly, you suck."

"Well, gee, Virg, you don't usually complain about my sucking." The blond lowered his voice. "Or my anything else, for that matter."

There was a pause. "Okay, you know the last thing I need? Is to be turned on while we get hitched. Especially since there's nothing we can do about it until tonight."

"Sorry." Richie really didn't sound sorry at all as he smoothed his lapels. "What is the best part of today?"

"Well, now I'm not going to tell you."

"Aw, come on. That's no fair." A pair of blue puppy dog eyes made Virgil sigh out loud.

"All right, all right. You know, you really should register those things as lethal weapons." Richie beamed. "The best part of today…it's getting to tell the entire world just how much I love you. Standing up in front of all of our friends and family…well, okay, and Bruce…and sharing with them what's in my heart. That you are my heart."

"Virgil…" He cleared his throat, at a loss for words. "…Really?"

"Really."

They kissed.

As they moved apart, Virgil seemed to consider for a moment. "Although, I have to admit, the presents are a close second…"

"I knew it!"