Disclaimer: I DO NOT own Newsies. However I do own Liz and I take all claims to Hoodlie and Josh. But everyone else is their own.
I just have to say I'm sorry for the long wait. Dude I knew what I wanted to do in these up coming chapters but how the hell do I write them? That's the only problem. So I just wanted to say I'm sorry for the long wait. Writers block was really getting to me, I'm sure you all can understand. But that still doesn't make up for it. :shrugs: Oh well, my bad. I'm not happy with the way these turned out, but I'm putting them up the way they are. I'll live.
Also please excuse my language in the narration part and what not, I'm in a bad mood today and I really don't care what the hell I say. :shrugs: That's just me.
"Snitch?" Itey said, standing beside the sleeping boy. He had awoken late, as did everyone else. "Snitch?" He said again as he kicked him slightly.
"What? I'm up." Snitch said as he yawned and opened his eyes. "What time is it?"
"I don't think we should be worried about da time, Snitch." Itey informed.
"What da hell are you talkin' about?"
"I think you should be wondering where Liz is." Itey said.
Snitch gave him a funny look and when he finally realized what he said he scrambled up and looked behind him, where she used to be. "Shit! Shit" He said as he stood up and looked everywhere he could. "Where da hell did she go?"
"How am I supposed tah know, you were here watchin' her."
"Don't be blamin' it on me, we gotta find her. Oh fuck!" He yelled. "God why can't dey just leave her alone."
"Snitch, why would dey take her? I mean, you beat da shit out of Oscar, dat other guy jus' passed out right in front of me an' da others were dead drunk. Dey were asleep through da whole thing, why would dey come an' take her?" Itey explained.
"How da hell am I supposed tah know. What do ya mean?"
"I mean dat she might have jus' walked off herself, ya know."
"I don't think so. Why would she leave when she told me tah watch her?"
"I don't know. She's always been an in-and-out goil, she's always been dat way. Look before you shit your pants, why don't you jus' go look for her? I mean, she has tah be somewhere."
"Well where da hell do I start?"
"How da fuck am I supposed tah know? You know her better den me, I'm sure you'll have an idea."
"I'm tellin' ya I don't."
"C'mon Mr. I-can-finish-her-sentences, just think. I have tah go sell, you try tah find her." Itey said as he went to leave.
"Hey, hold it. Why ain't you gonna help?"
"Because she really would run away if I tried tah find her. She hates me, an' you know it."
"She doesn't hate you. She just doesn't like you dat much."
"Oh dat makes it so much better. Now stop talkin' an' go find her. Find her before they do! Go!" Itey said as he opened the door. "Oh yeah, I'll sell for ya today, okay?"
"Thanks." Snitch replied back as he stretched. "Shit, where da hell am I supposed tah start?" He thought. Where would she go? Why would she leave in the first place? I mean she did get pissed at me because I left her last night and here she goes and leaves me. It just doesn't make any sense. But Itey knows his shit, he's better at this sort of thing than I am so I guess I'll listen to him. Snitch thought to himself. He walked around the city visiting place after place, and seeing no sign of Liz. He asked people on the street if they saw a really small Asian girl, but everyone said 'no'. He wasn't having any luck. Why was it so hard for him to find her? Probably because he didn't expect her to leave in the first place. Where da hell is she? I went to place after place, I asked person after person, why can't I find her? Did she leave the city or something? She couldn't have because her things were still there. She had to leave with something. He thought. Where would she go? Would she go to Tibby's? No, she hates eating. Would she go to the... He nodded his head in agreement. He finally found the answer he was looking for. "The church." He said as he rushed to the nearest church, the only church he knew of in Manhattan.
He'd never set foot in a church before not even when he was little. He never knew what one looked like and he didn't even want to know what one looked like either. He didn't need a church to find God. Not that he actually did "find" Him, but from the events last night, he did talk to God a little bit. If he really wanted to find God he'd find him in just any old place, he didn't need a religious setting to find what he was looking for. He looked around at the huge sanctuary. There were people kneeled around the whole church. They were praying in the pews, at the altar and just any other place. You couldn't hear a thing, it was pure silence. He felt a little uncomfortable being there, but he had something to do and by God he was going to do it. He looked around at the people and saw someone who at least resembled Liz from the back.
He walked over to her and went in the pew behind her. "Liz?" He whispered. She was so focused on her prayer that she didn't even hear him. "Liz?" He said again as he put his hand on her shoulder. She quickly turned around and dropped the bible that she was holding on the floor. She was shaking when she looked at him. "It's okay, Liz. It's just me." He assured. "Let's go. Let's go." He said as he guided her out of the church.
They walked out of the church together and were heading back to the Lodging House. "I can't believe you left, Liz. You scared da livin' shit outta me, you know dat right?"
She didn't answer him; she didn't even look at him. She just looked at the ground the whole time.
"But dat's okay, I understand, I guess. But if you wanna go somewhere, please tell me next time. You're gonna give me a heart attack if you jus' up an' leave like dat, ya know." He told her, knowing that she wasn't paying attention. "Liz are you listenin' tah me? Liz? Hello?" He said as he stood in front of her and put his hands on her shoulders to get her attention.
"OH MY GOD!" She screamed. "No!" She started freaking out as the memories of last night were playing through her head. She was reliving them. He triggered something in her mind and the whole scene just started playing again in her head, and it was so real. She thought it was actually happening again.
(A/N: These are flashbacks, don't get confused. I don't know how intense they'll be, I'm just gonna see where my fingers and my mind take me. So if you don't want to read this or see this, whatever, turn back now. I warned you. )
She jumped off the bed to run away but she was stopped by Oscar. He grabbed her shoulders and slapped her across the face. "You stupid bitch. Where da hell do you think you're goin'?" He teased as he grinned at her.
"I gotta go home. Oscar please. Don't do dis, please jus' let me go!" She screamed. "Help me! Someone please. Help me!"
"No one is gonna help ya, Liz. You're mine now." He said as he started kissing her all over.
"STOP IT! No!" She screamed as she started shaking and pushing Snitch away.
"No, it's okay. It's alright, I'm not gonna hoit ya. Liz, it's okay." Snitch tried to calm her, but he couldn't. He had no idea what was going on. He just held her and rocked her through everything. "It's okay, it's over, no one is gonna hoit you." He assured.
He grabbed her arms so hard, bruising them just by holding them, and he tied them behind her back as he threw her on the bed. She squirmed around to try to get away, but she couldn't. He grasped her still and got on top of her. She was screaming as hard as she could, hoping that someone could hear her, somewhere.
"You better shut da fuck up, Liz. Shut da fuck up!" He yelled at her as he covered her mouth with his hand. "I swear tah fuckin' God if you don't shut da fuck up I'll kill you. An' ya know what else I'll do, I'll come after your lover boy too. I'll fuck dem all up an' I'll kill dem all. Dey're all gonna be sufferin' an' ya know why? Because of you! Do you understand me?" He yelled. She looked at him with so much anger in her eyes, but she obeyed. And he took her, slowly and painfully. It was like a nightmare except it was real life and the pain was real. The fear was real and the pain was real. It was something that she never experienced before. Fuck the beatings, fuck the humiliation, out of all the things he's done to her this was the worst. It felt like everything was coming down on her, everything was turning its back to her, everything was closing its doors to her because of who she was, because of what she was. She didn't understand it, she didn't want to understand it, and she only knew what was going on. She closed her eyes as she let the tears fall on the blood and sweat stained bed. She hated the world, she hated everyone, she hated herself. Everything was over. Everything she once had and held close to her was gone. The only thing she called her own was gone, herself. From that moment on he would live in the back of her mind always. He would be the only thing she feared, rape was the only dream she would ever dream, "run away. Run away" would be the only goal she would work towards, trust would never again be given to anyone even if she had trusted them before. It was like her whole life had changed in that one moment.
She was sad, she was scared and she felt so alone. She was alone in this world as far as she knew it. She couldn't tell anyone anything. She couldn't talk about it, to anyone. The pain and suffering they inflicted on her would be endless, timeless. It would never go away even if she were long gone. That moment would be played out again and again throughout time. A million years could pass and that moment would still be locked in time. And it was, forever locked in her mind.
"It's okay. Liz, it's okay." Snitch assured as he held her tightly rocking her back and forth. She didn't embrace him back and eventually she stopped fighting him away. She just cried and cried. When she stopped struggling he knew the ordeal was over. He didn't know what he did though; he had never experienced anything like that before. Sure, he had flashbacks, but he didn't freak out like she did. She was just combustible, she wouldn't stop. "It's okay. You're okay now." He told her. He thought to himself about what he could have done to make her act like that. He had to have done something that happened last night to make her relive it like she was. He tried to think back to everything he said and everything he did. She started screaming when I touched her shoulders, so maybe it was something to do with her shoulders. He thought. He wanted to look and see what was wrong but would she let him. "Liz, I'm not gonna hoit ya, I promise. I wanna help you." He said. "You're okay, I jus' wanna look at your shoulders, okay. I jus' wanna see somethin'." He told her as he gently brought his hand to her shoulder. She started crying more and pushed his hand away. He knew he had to check it out so he grabbed her hand and held it tightly. "I'm your friend, Liz. I'm your friend, I'm not gonna hoit you."
"Snitch no." She cried softly.
"I'm not gonna hoit you. You're gonna be alright, I promise. No one is gonna hoit you again, I swear." He promised. "I jus' wanna help ya, because I'm your friend. Liz I'm your friend. Okay?"
"No." She said, shaking with fear and doubt.
"It's okay, Liz please. Jus' let me help you, please. Please." He begged. "Please. I'm not gonna hoit you. I'm not gonna hoit you Liz." He looked into her eyes. "Please?" She looked at him and knew he wouldn't do anything to her; she just didn't want to believe it. She knew that he wouldn't ever hurt her, but she didn't want to believe it. She let go of his hand, but still grabbed on to his arm. "Okay. It's okay." He said as he slowly pulled down the sleeve of her shirt to look at her shoulder, fearing it was covered in bruises. It was covered in bruises, but that wasn't the only thing it was covered in. There were hickeys everywhere, all over her neck and shoulders and even down to her chest. When he saw how abused she was his heart sank. He just wanted to cry. How could anyone do that to her, to someone as sweet and innocent as her? He didn't understand it. He couldn't understand it. He didn't want to understand it. "Oh God." He muttered. "Oh God." He said as he stood up.
"I'm sorry." She said shamefully. "I tried tah stop 'em. I tried." She started to cry.
He kneeled down to her. "What do ya gotta be sorry about, Liz? You didn't do anythin' wrong? It's dat bastard who oughta be sorry, not you."
"Who are ya talkin' about Snitch?"
"Oscar? Who did ya think I was talkin' about?"
"I don't know, I thought dat you, um, never mind."
"Liz, are you tellin' me it wasn't just him?" Snitch asked.
"I don't know, I was confused. Jus' forget I said anythin'." She panicked.
"Liz, what did dose fuckers do tah you?"
"I-I-I don't know. I can't – I can't remember everything." She said as she started breathing harder.
"You tell me everythin' dey did tah you."
"No, Snitch, I can't. I don't remember everythin'." She told him.
"Please, Liz tell me what you saw! I know you saw it, what did you see?" Liz just shook her head and cried. "Please, Liz. Jus' tell me, please."
"No."
"Why not? Why? I'm your friend, please. I wanna help you."
"I'm not gonna put you through dat, no, Snitch please." She cried.
"Well why not?"
"Because I don't want tah talk about it. I don't wanna have tah live through it again. Tellin' you or not tellin' you ain't gonna make a difference, Snitch. It ain't gonna make it go away or come back. It ain't gonna do nothin'. Alright Snitch you saw what happened an' you know damn well what went on las' night. Why should I tell you what you didn't see? It ain't gonna change anythin'." She told him. "Snitch, its jus' gonna hoit more. It's gonna hoit you an' it's gonna hoit me an' I don't wanna put you through anythin' else, okay?"
Snitch nodded and then shook his head in disbelief. How could anyone in their right mind do that to anyone. How could anyone do that to another human being? But that's how the world works now isn't it? Man is supposed to fight over man. And they say we're the superior ones, don't they? Yet we kill each other, torture each other for on reason at all. It doesn't make any sense, but that's the way the world works. That's the reason why innocent kids were thrown out on the street. That's the reason why the world was this way; because someone went nuts and evil came into the world. It was because of some nutcase that sweet innocent kids like me and Liz had to suffer. Who knew about the stories all the other newsies haven't told. It just didn't make any sense. What could drive Oscar to insanity and barbarianism? What was wrong with him? Why did he have it out for her? Did she threaten him in some way? Why is it such a task of his to make her life miserable? Why must he make it a normal routine in his day to make her suffer? It doesn't make any sense. And why for God sakes would he bring someone like Hoodlie in to this? Hoodlie, my best friend from way back. We were blood brothers. Fucking blood brothers. What could he have done to him to make him agree to that? Hoodlie wouldn't hurt a fly. It wasn't in his nature to hurt anything intentionally yet alone rape and abuse a poor innocent girl. He thought. He had to find out from Hoodlie himself. No one knew Hoodlie like Snitch did. They were best friends before he ran away. They did everything together, kind of like him and Liz. He had to find out. He took Liz back to the Lodging House, and waited for Itey to come back. While they waited Snitch couldn't and wouldn't talk to Liz, he wouldn't even look at her. It wasn't that he was ashamed of her, but he was ashamed of himself. He blamed himself for what happened. If he would have never confronted her last night and if he wouldn't have acknowledged the argument that he did, she would have never walked out that door last night. She would have never felt compelled to confide in someone about the ordeal that just went down at the Lodging House. She would have never went to Oscar's place, and she would have never been raped. It all pointed back at him. If he wouldn't have even been there in the first place. If he wouldn't have even woken her up then none of this would have happened. No matter what she said to him, no matter what anyone said to him, it was all his fault. If you traced the line from last night to what made her leave the Lodging House it all pointed to him, every single bit of it. He had to settle this once and for all. He couldn't take it, he needed answers and he knew who to get them from and exactly how to get them out of him. It didn't matter what happened, he was getting what he wanted.
SO's! Yay!
Splashey
JustDuck
Blue Boxer
...thanks you guys. You know I love you! You guys are friggen awesome.
Wow guys. I don't know about that one. Am I exactly happy with it? No, but it's a hell of a lot better than what I thought it would be. I think since I'm taking this approach other than the other approaches I've tried writing I've got a pretty good idea what's coming up next and an estimate about the end of this fic for you guys.
Now some frequently thought thoughts from you guys:
Is the ending pretty soon? Well you ask if I'm almost finished with this. Well I'll give you a one worded answer: NO!
How much longer is this fic? Well I'm not really sure. I have all these ideas in my head, but I don't know how many I'm going to fit in each chapter. If you read my profile I have updates on all my fics there. But from an estimate I think about 10 to 20 more chapters maybe. I know that sounds like a lot, but I have a whole 'nother year planned until the end finally comes near. And then you have to think about what happens in the end too, it can't just be over that soon you know. I can't say anything else because I'll give it away.
Why is it so long? Because I have a lot of ideas planned for you guys. Do you guys think I'm going to let Oscar win that easily? Yeah he's hott, and he's sexy and I want to have sex with him very badly (, haha that made me laugh), but that doesn't mean I'm going to give up on my girl, Liz. She's a fighter and she's going to fight that dude for as long as I want her to. Oscar you good looks can't get you out of the spot light dude, you're in deep man!
What are you planning on next? What ideas do you have? Well I'm thinking about having a lot of idea. Like let me think. I'm thinking about having there be a Snitch and Hoodlie chapter. Then I'm thinking about things getting quiet for a while. This happens and then that, Snitch try to go to the police and all that crap. Then they'll be a Oscar, Morris, Josh and Hoodlie chapter (with just those four). Then they'll be a kinda sweet-innocent-I-want-to-kiss-you chapter, and then there's going to be an OMG-why-the-hell-did-she-do-that chapter. And then there'll be an OMFG-they-are-so-cute-I-wish-I-had-a-friendship-like-that chapter. After that they'll be OMG-I-NEVER-want-to-even-think-about-having-sex-with-that-jerk-ever-again chapter. Then after that they'll be an I have one more reason to stay here chapter. And then they'll be something awesome but I can't tell you. I've already given too much away now. Yay!
Where the hell did Christina go? Haha I know you're wondering that Blue, I know it. Well I think I'm going to insert you in a chapter but then that's it. I really don't know, what am I supposed to do? Have you leave Blink and go to Oscar, what? You tell me. I'm not sure if I'm going to put that chapter in the story, but I'm certainly going to try. Since it's nothing really major I'll tell you what it'll be. Tag Along is having a sleepover party for the girls! She invites her main girls, Liz and Christina along to her house. Of course Liz doesn't want to go because she was raped so leave her alone! But she goes anyway. That is just sort of an update on all the girls' relationships (Tag and Specs and Christina and Blink) and then Liz tells them a secret only she and Snitch knew about (no it's not the rape, leave the girl alone). It's a secret that showed how intense her and Snitch's relationship REALLY was. It came from a thought I had (Chris I asked you this already and you like freaked out on me) and I couldn't resist it, it was to friggen hott for me.
....any last questions?
Do you love us? Yes I love you and do you know why? Because you guys are the ones keeping me writing this story! Yay! So do what you guys are experts at: go review!
NOW what is going down in the next chapter? I pretty much said everything but I'll tell you ahead of time.
-- Hoodlie, Mr. I would never hurt a flea, definitely hurt something more important than a flea and Snitch is pissed about it. Can Snitch keep his cool when he goes to see his long lost blood brother?
-- What did drive Hoodlie over the edge to commit such a horrific crime?
-- What terrible secrets does Hoodlie hold?
-- Did he really want to rape her? Or was he set up and made to?
Find out in the next chapter which will appear on here hopefully soon! Yay! No review like you have never reviewed before. Thank you loves.
