A/N: Sorry for the long wait. Hope it was worth it. ;) Thanks for all the comments.


Spinning the Wheel 31 - All For You

Some say being in love changes everything, transforms every second into an everlasting moment. And some say, love gives you that make everything fly by in an instant. Either way, being with the person you love is the greatest time in the world.

At least, Spike felt that way in the next three months. He spent most of his time with Buffy and it was heaven. Never had he believed that company could feel so good and soothing. He had spent three years in self-imposed solitude and now, he never wanted to be without her again. Whenever she smiled at him, it was like sunlight that warmed his heart and soul. Her mere presence was a gift he couldn't believe he deserved at all.

He loved being with her, her friends and her family. Joyce became a good friend as well as Giles. Dawn was almost like his own little sister. It even went so far that he started explaining guy stuff to her, which Buffy tried to prohibit unsuccessfully.

And for Buffy? Although she wasn't ready to admit it yet, she knew that she was falling for him as well. Bit by bit, every single day. She loved the way he looked at her with all his love and kindness. She loved that he knew what she was thinking without her needing to say it.

Why had she been with a guy like Riley in the first place, when there were guys like Spike? True, he had some unnerving habits but he really actually loved her. And that was more than most guys had given her so far.

"Morning," Buffy mumbled into the pillow as Spike pushed one stray strand out of her face and behind her ear.

He loved watching her sleeping or waking up. It was as if he wanted to cherish every moment they had together.

"Morning, luv," He smiled at her, leaned down, and gave her a peck on the forehead.

"How do you feel today?" She asked, sitting up as well. She blinked at him with sleepy eyes.

"Still a little queasy, but it's better."

Last night hadn't been all too well. They had been out to dinner at a Chinese restaurant to check out what it was like. But about two hours after being back at Spike's place, he had figured out that sweet and sour was not the food for him. So he'd spent most of the time in the bathroom.

"You think you're okay? I told you, if you want me to stay here and play nurse, I could skip classes."

"Tempting, but no. I'm a big guy, remember? Plus, college is important. I don't want you to end up as the bloody awful poet that I am." The smile he gave her was a little teasing.

"Alright, mom. I go to school, eat up all my lunch and won't go around kissing boys I don't know," She beamed at him, batting her eyes innocently.

"But you can kiss me if you want, since you know me and all." He smirked that cocky little smirk she often wanted to slap off his face since it was the most annoying thing she'd ever seen.

But this one seemed a little naughtier than usual. Buffy grinned at him, then slipped into his lap and gave him a sizzling kiss. He immediately melted into her as the kiss deepened, wrapping his arms around her slender waist, pulling her closer.

Buffy started to gyrate her hips a little against hips. She knew that he liked that and ever since he told her that he could feel a little more of his thighs than he did a month ago, he liked it even more.

She grinned against his mouth as she felt him starting to rise to the occasion. It always worked. Men were so simple sometimes.

Her hands started to roam over his bare chest (he had admitted that he used to sleep naked), caressing his well defined muscles. That was the advantage of him being in a wheelchair. His torso was as hard as any rock.

Spike's hands moved down to her butt, holdings her weight against the exact right spot. He broke away from her kisses, panting a little. She leaned her forehead against his, locking gazes with him. He could say so much with just one look.

And just now, he gave her the permission to pick up the discussion where they had left off three months ago.

Buffy looked at him a little surprised. When he'd said he needed time she'd mentally settled in for a really long time. "You sure?" she asked carefully.

In answer, Spike just nodded. He didn't have the strength to actually say it. She didn't know whether to smile or not. She had wanted this for a considerably long time and now that she had the chance, she was starting to become nervous.

Slowly, she resumed kissing him and her right hand travelled down his chiselled stomach. The she let it slip below the thin blanket. She moved slowly, giving him time and opportunity to tell her to stop. But he didn't. He simply kept kissing her sweetly and first broke away when her warm little hand reached its destination.

He gasped quietly and closed his eyes at the rushing sensation that threatened to over run his system.

It had been almost three years since someone had touched him like that. Harmony had made an attempt but he had pushed her away. Not now. He was letting Buffy touch him and it felt incredible.

Her touch was soft and hesitant, as if she was afraid of breaking something.

Slowly, he opened his eyes, just to stare directly into hers. She was searching his face for all the tiny little reactions he was showing, trying to figure out what he liked best. She looked so lost and helpless that he almost felt the urge to smile. But he knew that would only scare her even more.

So he took the initiative and closed his hand about her fingers, guiding her a little, setting the right speed and angle.

Buffy grinned a proud little grin as she continued her ministrations and he closed his eyes again with a small sigh of pleasure. She could do that to him. Even though she needed some help, it was still her.

She watched him lick his lips and she registered that his hands started to shake a bit. His breath become a little quicker and had a tiny ragged edge. She felt him throbbing against her fingers and his entire body tensed up against hers. Applying a little more pressure with her hand, she leaned into him and started nibbling at his neck and ear.

His breath felt hot against her skin. "Don't stop. Please, don't stop." His voice was rough and husky.

Buffy leaned back from him again, watching his features twist in pleasure. When his panting become even a bit more ragged, he opened his eyes and looked into hers. His eyes had darkened a shade or two and were covered with pure lust. He wanted to tell her how good he felt but he couldn't. Not only was most of his strength focussed on other things in the moment but also there were no proper words he could have said. All he could do was to give into the sensation that was boiling up inside him. He knew that he wouldn't be able to last any longer.

His body started quivering and Spike had to bite his lip to keep himself from calling out her name as he came in her hand. His head fell back as a whirlwind of ecstasy surged through his system. Never before had he felt so vulnerable, not even when he had told Buffy about the accident. He was completely at her mercy, and quite literally lay in her hands. That was what he had tried to avoid, the feeling of getting served. To block out the bad feelings, he thread his fingers into her hair and pulled her into a searing kiss.

Buffy's hand remained between their bodies and continued stroking him in a slow rhythm.

"What time is it?" she mumbled against his lips after a while.

Spike broke away from her, looking on the alarm clock on the bedside table. "Almost 8.30. Why?"

In an instant, Buffy was on her feet, wiping off her hand on the bed sheet. "Shit, I'm late for my morning class. Can I use your shower?" She started searching for her clothes. Ever since the became an item, she had developed the habit of sleeping on one of his shirts and scattering her belongings all over the place.

"Sure. You want me to whip up some breakfast?" Spike asked.

"Oh, that would be awesome." She zipped towards him, pressing a hard kiss in his lips. "You're awesome. Can I keep you?" she beamed at him.

"You do. Now get cleaned up."

Buffy disappeared into the bathroom, leaving Spike alone. He leaned his head against the headboard of the bed, taking a deep breath to get his brain to work properly again. He was a little disappointed that reality had filtered back into their little private moment but he knew that he couldn't live in such a fantasy world. He had learned that he also had to focus on other people's need and lives as well. If he had learned one thing from Dru breaking up with him then it was that. He hadn't seen it coming because he had been so absorbed with his own business that she had taken him off guard. And he had paid the price.

He was already starting to get up, as the doorbell rang. He grunted, a little unnerved, pulling his wheelchair closer to the bed.

"You expecting someone?" Buffy's head poked into the doorway; she was still dressed in his shirt.

"No. Can you get it?"

"Sure."

Buffy buzzed the door open and waited at the open door for the early visitor.

"Ben?" She stared incredulously at the young doctor. "What are you doing here?"

"Morning, Buffy," He smiled a little sheepishly. "Your mom told me you were here. I'm on the way to my shift and I wanted to speak to you and… Mr Rayne." He couldn't quite block out a streak of irritation from his voice. He had obviously noticed the shirt she wore and that it was the only thing she wore.

"Uh.. yeah, sure." Buffy turned halfway, calling for Spike.

The young man appeared a moment later. He hadn't bothered to dress; he had just bunched up the stained bed sheet around hips, leaving half of his body bare.

"What's it?" Surprise flashed over Spike's face as he saw Ben standing in the door.

"Ben wanted to speak to us," Buffy explained.

"Does he?" Spike up an eyebrow, taking in the picture of the med and his girlfriend. Although he tried to push it away, he felt jealousy bubbling up inside him.

"Yeah, I'll make it short." Ben frowned a little, trying to cover it though, when Spike possessively put his hand around Buffy's hips and pulled her closer towards him.

Spike tilted his head to one side, gesturing him to continue. Not that he didn't like Ben, he had no idea if he was a nice guy or not, but he felt that he had on eye on his girl. That was enough not to let him be around for too long.

"I.. uhm.. I contacted a friend of mine. We went to med school together. He's in a hospital in London now and is on his way to becoming a neurological surgeon. He wants to write his thesis about the reproduction and rebuilding of nerves and muscles in cases of transplantation and such."

"Okay, I'm getting that he's a pretty smart guy. What does it have to do with us?" Spike interrupted impatiently.

Buffy glared at him but didn't say anything.

"As I said, I contacted him because I think he might be able to help you. Since you already started to heal, there might be a chance that his methods could work."

"But you don't know? He's just trying."

Ben hesitated for a moment before he answered. "That much is true, yeah. I'm not denying that it's more of pilot project than a promise but there is a chance. Recent tests and surgeries show that over 75 of the nerves are working properly again. A woman who had lost her hand in an accident can already write again after 6 weeks.

Spike let that sink in for a moment. "But my legs weren't cut off, they just don't work anymore."

"I don't know much about the methods he's applying. I know that he is also working with some sort of laser technology but more than that, I don't know. But it's working. You should consider that." Ben reached into his back pocket of his pants. "If you want to call him, here's his number." He held out a business card, which Spike reluctantly took.

"Thanks, I'll… I'll think about that."

"Great. Well, that's it. I'm gone. Have a nice day then." Ben nodded courtly, giving Buffy a thin smile and then headed for the stairs.

"Stupid git," Spike grunted, before he turned and made his way into the kitchen.

Buffy followed him. "What is that supposed to mean? He wants to help. And isn't it great that he wound up someone who might help you?" She propped her hands on her hips. She didn't like Spike's mood swing at all.

"Yeah, it's really awesome to bring up a guy who's looking for some lab rats. No, thanks." Spike slapped the business card on the table, anger filling his voice.

"Didn't you listen? He said that it was working." Now it was Buffy who became angry.

"Wrong. It might work. He's not sure. And don't you get shirty on me. It's my bloody decision."

"I am not shirty, what ever that means anyway. But okay, if you're not going to call him, I will." She lunged for the card. Spike reached for it, too, but she was faster.

"No, you won't," He spat, as his eyes glittered with fury.

"Yes, I will." Buffy let out a breath. "Spike, I just want to help you."

"By falling into my back on this? Thanks, but I don't need that sort of help. If you're so hot for a guy who can walk, why don't you go to your Ben?"

All Buffy could to was stare at him. Anger was boiling up inside her. What was that supposed to mean? Their morning had started out so great and now they were fighting. And did he really think she had it for Ben?

"Oh please, come on. I saw the looks he gave you."

"And what makes you think I returned them? You think I'd given you that hand job if I didn't have any feelings for you?"

Spike snorted. "Oh thank you so much. That really means something. But just so you know, I'm perfectly capable of wanking off on my own. Guess how I got off before you came along."

She stared at him. She didn't have anything to say to that, she didn't have the words. Tears started to flood Buffy's eyes. How could he be so mean to her?

"You're such an idiot," was all she could say before she quickly dressed and left the apartment without another word.