All the usual disclaimers!
I hope that people haven't found Emma Jane too dislikable in this story and that they can understand why she's done what she's done. Also, hope you can understand both Hank and EJ's reactions in this chapter. Always pleased to hear what people think about the characters' behaviour!
Hank threw open the door of the saloon and yanked Emma Jane in behind him. The few customers who had remained inside looked up at the entrance, Jessica paused as she was about to sit on an older man's lap.
"Git out!" Hank yelled at them all. They all stared back at him, "Now!"
Exchanging glances, the men got to their feet and made their way uneasily past Hank, who looked as though he was about to explode, and outside. The girls hovered nervously.
"Git upstairs," he ordered them and, knowing better than to argue, Jessica and the others scuttled away upstairs, leaving Hank and Emma Jane alone in the saloon. He stood with his back to her and Emma Jane wrung her hands nervously behind him.
"Hank…"
"Is it true?" he repeated quietly, although he already knew the answer.
"Yes," Emma Jane replied equally as quietly, "It's true."
"You were attacked by the same man that attacked Martha Lawrence?"
"Yes."
"When?"
"The night before it happened to Martha," the words came tumbling out, "The night before you came home from Soda Springs."
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"I wanted to," she replied honestly, "there was nothing I wanted more, but…but I couldn't. I was afraid of what people would say about me. I saw how they reacted to Martha. And…I was worried about what you might do. I saw how riled up you got about what happened to Martha and…I was afraid of what you might say."
"'Bout ya lyin with another man or 'bout ya just lyin'?" He turned around to face her.
"I didn't lie with him, Hank," she replied, "he forced me. That's what rape is!"
"Don't talk to me like I'm simple," he threatened her, "What happened?"
"I was taking out the trash when…he just grabbed me from behind and dragged me to the stable and…" she sighed heavily, "he was drunk, maybe if I hadn't served him as much whiskey…"
"Ya knew him?" Hank latched onto this.
She nodded, "He was drinking in here before. It took us a while to get him to leave, but I…I thought he had gone. I never expected him to come back. But…" she started to cry, "but he threw me on the ground and…and he forced himself inside of me…"
"Don't wanna hear it," Hank said, striding behind the bar and pouring himself a whiskey. He downed it in one and looked hard at her, "That why you bin so cold to me?"
"I don't know what you mean."
"Ya know exactly what I mean, Emma Jane," he replied angrily, "Bin turnin' yer back on me, pushin' me away, actin' like ya don't want me anymore. Every time I try to touch ya, ya either hit me, tell me yer too tired or act like it's a chore."
"And do you know why?" she asked, unable to believe that was all he could think about, "Because every time you touch me, all I can think about is him. About what he did to me! You have no idea what it's been like for me these past few days!"
"That's real nice," he replied acerbically, "Comparin' me to a man that raped ya."
"That's not what I meant," she replied trying to catch his arm as he strode past her.
"Tell me this," he rounded on her, "how did Michaela know?"
"When I fainted in Loren's store and she examined me, she found the injuries."
"Injuries?"
Emma Jane nodded, "The bruising, and she said I had some inflammation…inside."
"She examined ya?"
"Yes."
"So what's the verdict?" he asked her pointedly, "he leave behind somethin' I should be worried about, like a little bug…or a little bastard?"
Emma Jane slapped him hard across the face and instantly, he hit her back, a blow that sent her crashing into the bar, winding her. He had only ever done it once before, two years earlier, and then, he had been full of remorse, begged for her forgiveness and promised it would never happen again. This time, he did none of those things. His eyes were cold and he didn't seem sorry.
"How…could you…say that?" she asked, trying to catch her breath, "how could you think…?"
"Didn't think ya'd ever lie to me an' ya did," he replied, "Don't know what to think any more."
"I didn't lie!"
"Ya didn't tell me neither! Made me look a fool in front of everybody!"
"So that's what really matters, is it? You looking foolish in front of everyone? It doesn't matter that I was violated and humiliated, oh no. As long as you can keep face in this town!" She held her hand to her burning cheek.
"That sure as hell seems to be yer problem!" he retaliated, "Ya didn't want anyone to know what had happened to ya, how's that any different?" She didn't have an answer, "S'ides, that ain't what I'm sayin'."
"Well it certainly sounds that way!" She latched back on to his faults, grateful to escape from her own.
Hank sighed, "What did he say to ya?"
"Nothing. Not during the attack anyway."
"What about earlier?"
Emma Jane shrugged, "Well, he…talked a bit, I suppose. Asked me how I was, that kind of thing."
"That kind of thing?"
"I don't know!" she threw up her hands, "He was just another customer, Hank. The kind that you seem to like having in this place!"
"What ya sayin'?" he asked dangerously, "Ya blamin' me? Tryin' to make out that it's my fault?" He wasn't sure who he was really yelling at, her or himself.
"Well it isn't mine!" she shouted back, "I didn't ask for any of this to happen, Hank, none of it! I didn't ask to be attacked, and I didn't ask for there to be a trial and I didn't ask for Grey Owl to be found guilty and I didn't ask for Martha Lawrence to scream about what happened to me in the street!"
"Didn't do nothin' to stop it, though, did ya? Didn't speak up when we was havin' the trial. Didn't say that the Injun couldn't have done it, did ya?" he growled at her, "Maybe's ya were flirtin' with him."
"What? Who?"
"This guy. Seen the way ya act with the customers, Emma Jane. Ya don't sell it, but yer sure good at puttin' it on show."
Emma Jane was dumbfounded, "You…you…he was just another man, another drunken man that I have to pretend to be nice to, to encourage to drink more so that you can make a profit and never mind the consequences to me or the girls! You think I like smiling and talking with men that I find so utterly repulsive! Men who spend all their time drinking and smoking and gambling and partaking of the 'hospitality'?"
"Men like me, ya mean," he said squarely.
"They're pathetic!" she raged at him, "They shouldn't be allowed to call themselves men!"
"Sayin' I ain't a man?"
"What kind of man blames his wife when she gets raped? What kind of man won't understand, won't comfort her, won't be there for her!" Emma Jane sobbed, "If you can't do that, Hank, then no, you're not any kind of man!"
"No?" he lunged at her and pushed her up against the bar, forcing her legs apart with his knee and pinning her arms to her sides, "Well, maybe I should just rape ya too! Ya don't seem to like it when I'm gentle and nice so maybe I's just force ya too, huh? Ya like that!" he yelled in her face.
"Stop it!" Emma Jane screamed, struggling in his grip, "Get off me!" She pushed him away and they stood facing one another, "How can you treat me like this! How can you say you love me and then turn around and treat me like I'm…"
"Like yer what? One of the 'girls'?" he sneered at her, "Ya might think yer better than them because ya come from New York, ya were raised with table manners and ya spent all yer time goin' to shows and parties, but let me tell you, Mrs Lawson," he came up close to her again, "Git yer skirts up an' yer legs apart and ya ain't no better than any of 'em."
"You're disgusting!" Emma Jane screamed at him, "I should never have come here! If I'd stayed in New York, none of this would ever have happened! I'd be married to some nice, rich man, living in a nice house with nice clothes and a nice life! Instead, I'm stuck here with a violent, aggressive brute like you in this hell-hole!"
"Well maybe ya should just leave then!" he yelled back, "Fact is, maybe ya should have left all them years ago when ya had the chance! If it's so bad here, why stay? Go back to New York, Emma Jane! Live the life ya were supposed to!"
At that moment, Jessica appeared at the door, "Emma Jane?"
"Git out!" Hank turned and yelled at her.
"Don't you speak to her like that!" Emma Jane shouted.
Hank advanced on Jessica, who stepped back, "I said, git back up them stairs!"
"Stop it!" Emma Jane grabbed Hank's arm and pulled him back, "I hate how you speak to her! I hate how you speak to all of them! You abuse the girls who live here, you abuse me – your own wife! You're no better than that rapist!" He whirled around to fight her off, grabbing her wrists and twisting them painfully, dragging her across the room, forcing her to her knees on the floor in front of him.
Hank raised his hand as if to strike her and Emma Jane steeled herself for the blow. But it didn't come. All of a sudden, he released her and her arms dropped to her lap as he stepped back from her, breathing heavily. Emma Jane sat looking up at him for a moment, before he went back to the bar and poured himself another drink.
Jessica, still cowering in the corner, spoke up, "Vicky's fussin'," she explained, her voice unsteady "thought…ya might be able to calm her down."
Emma Jane nodded and got to her feet, "I'll be up in a minute," she told the other girl, her breath coming in short bursts from fear and adrenaline. Jessica nodded and then ran back up the stairs.
Emma Jane turned back to her husband, "Is this how it's going to be?" she asked, "You blame me, we fight and you hurt me?" Hank didn't reply, "Because I won't live like that, Hank, I assure you. I don't deserve that. I may have lied to you and not told you about what had happened, but I don't deserve the way you're treating me now. And if you think I do, then we have a problem. I've already been abused by one man, I'm not about to allow the man I married to abuse me too." She pushed her loose hair back from her face, "I'm going to go and see to our daughter."
She left the room, leaving Hank standing, holding his glass. After a moment, he threw it hard against the opposite wall, so that it smashed into a thousand pieces.
When she reached Victoria's room, Emma Jane closed the door behind her and leant against it for a long moment, closing her eyes briefly. Her face ached from where he had hit her and when she looked down at her wrists, she saw the red marks left by his hands. Her heart was beating wildly in her chest as she stepped forward and lifted Victoria up. Holding her to her, she breathed in her familiar baby smell and felt it begin to relax her.
At that moment, however, the door flew open and Hank appeared in the doorway. Emma Jane stepped back towards the bed, hugging her child to her. He still looked angry, and she was afraid of him, afraid of what he might do to her.
He looked at her for a long time before speaking, "What'd he look like?"
"What?" she asked, momentarily confused.
"The guy," he asked, "What'd he look like?"
"Uh…tall, dark hair, blue eyes…black pants and hat…I…I don't really remember, why?"
He didn't answer her, instead, he turned away from the door.
Emma Jane put Victoria back down in her bed and hurried after him, "Why do you want to know?" she called after him, "What are you going to do?"
"Never ya mind," he replied tautly.
"I do mind!" she said, "I mind if you're planning on riding out after him and maybe getting yourself hurt, or worse!"
Hank laughed, but there was no mirth behind it, "So, ya actually care about what happens to me?" he turned to face her.
"Of course I do," she replied, "You're my husband, I love you, and I don't want to see you get hurt over something foolish like revenge."
"Ya think it's foolish?" he checked his gun, "It ain't foolish."
"It is!" she insisted, "Riding off like some…some…vigilante, killing a man over it?"
"It's about loyalty, Emma Jane, protecting yer own. What kinda man would I be if I didn't go after him? Oh, wait," he paused, "I ain't a man, right?"
"That's not what I said, and you know it!" Emma Jane protested, "I don't want this! I don't want you to go after him!"
"Ain't about what you want!" he replied angrily, "It's about doin' what's right. Sure Jake and Loren'll come with me." He headed out through the bar, Emma Jane in hot pursuit.
"Please, don't!" she cried, grabbing his arm.
He swung around and pushed her back, "Don't make me hurt ya," he warned quietly.
"You've already done that, I'm not scared of it," she replied boldly.
"Ya should be."
He turned and pushed through the saloon doors, back out into the street where a number of people were still milling around. There was no sign of Sully or Grey Owl, and Emma Jane assumed they had made a sharp exit as soon as his guilt had been brought into question. She watched as Hank conversed briefly with Jake and Loren and then they turned to head for their horses. A few customers, having seen Hank leave and assuming the danger was over, started to make their way back into the saloon and she resumed serving.
As the day stretched on into night, there was no sign of Hank returning, and Emma Jane started to grow worried. There was a subdued air about the saloon, which unnerved her and meant she couldn't lose track of time in the hustle and bustle. The customers were all still stunned by the events of the day, and many regarded her warily as she moved around the saloon. The girls also seemed rather quiet and Emma Jane suspected Jessica had told them all about what had happened.
As she closed the doors for the night, Emma Jane turned to see Jessica hovering by the stairs.
"It's ok," she told her, "I'll finish clearing up."
"If yer sure," Jessica replied.
"Yes, honestly. Go to bed," Emma Jane waved her away, "Could you just look in on Victoria on your way past?"
"Sure," Jessica replied, before heading back upstairs.
Emma Jane cleared away the dirty glasses and swept the floor, all the time going to the window and looking out in the hope that she might see Hank approaching. To no avail. Once she had done as much cleaning as could be justified, she made her way upstairs into her room and got ready for bed. As she pulled her dress off, she glanced down and saw her bruises were beginning to change colour. They were the only outside mark that anything had happened to her. All the other suffering was internal.
She climbed into bed, but knew she would never be able to sleep, so she lifted one of the terrible dime novels that Loren stocked in the store and flicked through a few pages, yet was unable to take her mind off of everything that had happened.
It was around one o'clock before she heard the sound of horses hooves and, hurrying to the window, she saw Jake, Loren and Hank arrive back in town. They dismounted outside the saloon and spoke amongst themselves for a few moments, before parting company. She saw Hank lead his horse around the back of the saloon and climbed back into bed.
She heard the sound of the back door opening and closing, heard him pouring a drink and then his footfalls on the stairs. She heard the sound of a door creak and knew he had looked in on Victoria. She scrambled down under the covers, not sure whether to pretend to be asleep or not when he came in. They had so much they needed to talk about, and she wasn't even sure where to begin.
Emma Jane listened as Hank closed Victoria's door and approached their own door. Then there was a pause, and his steps moved to one side. There was the sound of another door opening and closing and muffled voices, one she could definitely recognise as her husband's. The other was higher-pitched and there was a confused, worried tone to it before there was silence.
That was when Emma Jane realised that instead of coming to her bed, Hank had gone to Jessica's.
