Hope you've liked the chapters so far. I can't believe how excessively I use '...' – too much! Anyway, I've gone through my chapters in a vain attempt to cut it out. Hope it doesn't impair the flow of the story, but only you guys can be the judge of that. Characters copyrighted to Squaresoft inc.
.:Chapter 3 – Pretty Vacant:.
"There's no point in asking, you'll get no reply…" Sex Pistols
So, uh, yeah, where was I? Ah yes, now I remember, I had just received a rather forceful blow to the side of my face by some chick wearing a goddamned pronged combat glove who had previously trashed my apartment and broken down my goddamn door. Riiiight, and, if I'm not mistaken I turned on the lights and, oh yeah…
"How in Odin's name did you find out where I lived?" I exclaimed, whilst nursing the side of my face with a cold flannel.
"I hacked into Shinra's confidential staff database. Security is lax on confidential files now that the corp went bust. They have all your past and present addresses," she coolly replied, tightening the glove strap on her hand, "So, wasting away in Junon now that you're no longer Shinra's lapdog… Red?"
"What's it to you?" I scowled, "Since when did you care about the well-being of a Turk, Tifa?"
Her eyes glanced down, dulling as they looked at her fingers pulling at the combat glove strap. I must've hit a nerve with her. The infamous Tifa Lockheart, one of the famous Saviours of the Planet paying me a 'friendly' visit? An ex-Turk, an enemy? It just didn't add up. I was the guy that dropped the Sector 7 plate, killing her tree-hugging hippie friends, injuring all those slummers, what the fuck was she here for? It was so not right...
I reckoned that if she wasn't here for casual sex, it was probably something really serious, or she just had a hankering to laugh her ass off at my subsequent misfortune. Hey, it happens, even to the suavest of guys such as myself…
"Look Tifa, are you going to tell me what you're doing here?" I probed impatiently.
Sighing, she reached into her skirt pocket removing a computer disc, carefully placing it down on the table in front of me.
"You came here to give me a soddin' computer disc? What do you want me to do with it? Shove it up my ass?" I sighed.
This was just so pointless. If I weren't so concussed, wasted, drunk, insert word here, then this situation would have been a helluva lot easier. At the least, I could have held her at gunpoint and gotten some fuckin' answers, but at the moment it was like getting blood outta a stone. This situation made no sense, she'd come here alone? No backup? No bubble-butt hero of the planet to cover her ass? This just didn't add up…
"Screw you, Reno," she shouted angrily whilst walking towards me, "Screw you…"
"Is that an offer, babe?" I drawled cheekily. Hey, I had to test the water! I mean she could actually be here for casual sex (if nothing else), "I didn't realise you felt tha- OUCH!"
Before I could finish my torrent of innuendo-soaked comebacks, a stinging slap had been planted across the side of my face. Another burst of light appeared before my eyes, leaving me blinded and a little more vulnerable than I would usually have liked. Next thing I knew I had been pushed on to my back, falling on my clothes-strewn bed, feeling my wrists being tightly bound to my iron bedposts. I couldn't help but smirk, it was just too tempting…
"My, my, my Tifa Lockheart. Who would have thought that such a charming Nibelheim girl would be into such..." I broke off deliberately, "…filth."
I could see her eyes flaring with anger as she purposely yanked each bond around my wrists so they were uncomfortably tight.
"Oooo, someone likes it rough," I smirked. "Just the type of girl I like."
"Will you just quit it!" shouted the brunette. "Enough!"
So far she had slapped me across the face, I could deal with that, but her knee was worryingly close to a rather sensitive area of my anatomy. One day, I want kids, ya know, and in order to do that, I'd need to be able to 'function', if you catch my drift. Obviously, I decided to keep my mouth shut, for a little while anyway.
After subjecting me to an obviously sexually charged bondage session, she climbed off of my bed and retreated to a darkened corner of my disorderly room, sitting in an old swivel chair. I stared at her, watching the way she tucked her hair behind her ears, straightening that extra-tiny mini skirt that barely covered her… modesty, for want of a better word. Grinning, that baaad side of me just had to follow up now I was in somewhat of a rather compromising situation.
"So Ms Lockheart, aren't you going to have your wicked, wicked way with me now that I'm all helpless and conveniently tied up?" I purred, "You know, I really dig chicks that dominate."
Silence…
…she said nothing at all, just rolled her eyes. Jeez, what the fuck was her problem? I mean, I'm an attractive guy; I'm a damn ex-Turk for fuck's sake. I've got scars, I've got a lot going for me, oh and I own a gun. Sure, I mean I like to drink, I'm not an innocent 'nice guy' and I don't pretend to be cuz, well, nice guys finish last, right? I'll admit I killed a few of her friends, but her and 'Spike' managed to take out a shit load of ShinRa troops, so what was her problem? We were even, but it was like she was too good to screw me.
I know! What's up with that?
Oh, and don't give me that, she doesn't fancy you bullshit, or she loves Cloud shite because I know it ain't true - it's just a soddin' cover up. She just has serious morality issues. I mean because, like, I dropped that soddin' plate, by her fucking me it'd be like betraying all those dead guys. Gods, she so needs to get over that – a guy like me ain't gonna wait forever.
Okay, rant over... let's get back on track.
"Are you done yet?" she sighed.
End Silence.
"Well, seen as you aren't going to take advantage of me at this very moment, I'll try my luck later," I beamed. "Next time I won't go so easy on you, ya hear?"
What was that I just saw! A smile? From the stone fox herself! Awww, she totally digs me. Didn't I tell you?
Finally, those screwed up morality issues were put aside; I've still got the touch - damn right. Guess now that she wasn't so, obviously premenstrual, we could have a civilised non-violent conversation and I could finally find out what the fuck she was doing here.
"So, you brought me a disc, how very kind," I sighed. "First of all, I wanna know why a girl like you is visiting a guy like me… apart from the complimentary fucking, of course."
She rolled her eyes again. Gods, what the shit is with that? Chicks always do it, haven't you guys noticed?
Here's a great example: You tell them something you and the boys were shittin' yourselves over in the bar and what do they go and do? You guessed it; they sit and roll their fuckin' eyes as if they're so goddamn superior.
Another example: You know, when you ask them for head? Quick roll of the eyes and then they start chomping away at it. I mean for Odin's sake…
"I wouldn't have come here unless I had to," she replied coolly whilst lighting a 'Mild Seven' cigarette.
Didn't I tell you? Booyah, I knew it was 'Mild Seven,' but when did she start smoking?
"Gee, that really answers my fuckin' question," I scoffed angrily.
"Rude's dead, Reno," she replied quietly. "It was a viral assassination, he's dead."
What the fuck?
"Get the fuck outta here!" I shouted. "Rude's not dead. That's not funny alright? He's not dead! You know what? You're so fuckin' full of SHIT!"
It was shit, it must be. Complete total shit. Rude would no way stand for that shit. A viral assassination? Yeah, ha-ha, good one, Tifa. I mean, come on, Rude never got sick and he wouldn't be fuckin' stupid enough to get stabbed with a syringe - he was an ex-Turk for Holy's sake. She was lying to me, she had to be, I mean, that's just sick; its sick and it's messed up.
"You're a fuckin' liar," I spat. "What in fuck's name do you want!"
"Believe it or not, I want to help you," she sighed, "but you have to believe me when I tell you he's dead."
What was her deal? She comes in, breaks down my door, beats me up, ties me to my bed, and then tells me that my, as good as, best friend is dead! This just wasn't happening – it sooo wasn't happening, but then, let's take a step back… why would she lie about that? What would she gain? Oh Gods, what was going on?
"How? How do you know?" I replied. "Since when has cavorting with Turks been a past time, Tifa!"
"He found us," she responded. "He sought us out."
"Us!" I snarled. "You and 'Spike'? Oh, I'm sure you both welcomed him with fuckin' open arms!"
"Do you know what its like to have someone die in your arms, Reno!" she shouted. "Do you! I know, alright, because Rude died in mine!"
Oh yeah, that's right Tifa, lay it on real thick. Do I know what its like? I was a Turk, an assassin, I killed people for them; I dealt with 'problems,' of course I knew what it was like… of course, right?
I'd killed, I'd killed hundreds. Shot them, shocked them, torched them etc, but I…I always left the scene, always - evidence had to be removed, you know? I'd killed, but… I'd never had someone die in my arms, except on that day… no.
"No, Tifa, I fuckin' haven't!" I hollered. "Is that what you wanna hear? I bet knowing that makes you feel real big, doesn't it? Knowing you're so compassionate! I bet you really get off on that, don't you?"
"Yeah, sure, I get off on people dying in my arms. That's right you bastard!" she screamed. "It makes me feel real big, you fuckin' jerk off."
Ok, I said I'd alternate between first and third person and this chapter was supposed to be written in third but…nevermind ;; Again, realllly sorry for excessive swearing, but I always thought of Reno as a bit of a lad teehee. I have actually tried to cut out a substantial amount, hope it semi worked. So, um, now you've read my fic – review review runs off screaming
