A/N: Sorry for the bizarre "o's" and "0's" - they were the only format of line breaks that I could get "Document Manager" to take.

Descent into Madness

II.

Brother to Brother

The next time Sirius saw James was at dinner that evening. He had come down to eat late and reluctantly sank into the seat Remus had saved for him. James was once more speaking to Lily and both were grinning. Both were happy.

He played with the few food items on his plate, not having eaten any. He ignored Remus' pointedly significant glances. Peter was eyeing him from across the table, yet without the concerned gleam of Remus' eyes. "I heard you were kicked out of the library today, Padfoot."

Sirius stared at the grinning, round-faced boy before him. Peter stopped chuckling to himself when the other did not relent in his stare.

"What's wrong, Padfoot?" Moony's quiet voice and innocent, expectant face constricted Sirius' throat. He eyed Remus a moment, the other beginning to wonder as Sirius' eyes lingered on his scars. Perhaps he should talk to Moony. He might understand, after all. But he knew how he'd respond. He didn't want to have to suffer the empathy is Remus' eyes if he told him. He didn't want to speak it at all, for to speak it would make it horribly real. He'd rather continue with the altered hope that if he ignored it long enough it might go away…

He didn't answer Moony's question but instead felt his gaze boring into his back as he left the table and headed for the common room without a word.

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Not wanting to speak to anyone, Sirius went to bed early. He lay awake for what felt like hours, yet when Remus and Peter entered he feigned sleep. They muttered about the start of the last week before the holidays. Peter was reciting his Christmas list.

Sirius had left his bed hangings open and could sense Remus eyeing him at intervals yet gave no indication that he wasn't asleep. Their tongues soon fell silent and Peter's heavy breathing filled the air.

Sirius glanced at the clock. It was 10:15 on a Sunday night; all of James' friends were in bed. There was only one thing that could be keeping him from boredom at this hour. Try as he might, he couldn't quell the wounded anger that surfaced with this thought.

When James finally slipped in a half hour later, Sirius wasn't about to let him off easily.

"We've got class tomorrow morning, you know."

James paused in pulling on his pajama top, obviously having thought his friend had been asleep. "I know."

"Well, you were up pretty late."

James raised his eyebrows. "By the looks of it so are you." He eyed Sirius a moment longer yet spoke when it became clear the other boy wasn't inclined to. "Since when do you care about bedtimes, anyway? I think before midnight's pretty good for a Sunday night."

"Maybe I'm different now. You wouldn't know."

"What?"

"I've hardly seen you lately. You spend all your time with Lily!"

"Keep your voice down, Remus and Peter are sleeping."

"See if I care."

"What's the matter with you?"

"Nothing's wrong with me, it's you who's got the problem."

"You don't see me pouting all the time, do you?"

"What?" Sirius rose onto his knees, kneeling on the bed. "I dare you to come and say that to my face."

"Padfoot…." James gave him an apologetic sigh.

"Stuff it James. No need to save face, I already know what kind of friend you are."

James' hands balled into fists. "How am I supposed to know what's wrong if you don't tell me?"

"I don't need to tell you! You already know, you stupid git!"

"Fine then, just cry about it all you want. I'm not going to try and help you anymore."

"That's hardly news."

"Meaning?"

"You stopped the minute that tart started paying attention to you!"

James' teeth were gritted. "Don't you dare speak about Lily like that."

Sirius smiled, a vengeful anger and exhilaration prompting him to defy his friend even further. "I can talk about her in any way I please."

James' chest heaved as he stepped forward, pointing his finger menacingly at Sirius. He held no hope now of letting the other two sleep. "You watch your mouth!"

Sirius leaned forward, his voice dipping into a growl. "And what are you going to do, James? Hit me?"

"I'm thinking about, yeah."

"Well I'm right here."

The two continued to glare at each other, ignoring Remus' quiet voice advising them to drop the matter and reminding them of their friendship.

When James froze in mid-step, fists clenched, Sirius threw him a lopsided smirk, his voice still deadly low. "Don't try and be noble, James. I know you want to hit me."

James fought for words. "Shut… up…"

"Padfoot stop it!" Remus was nearly screaming, looking as if he didn't know which one of them to grab first. Peter remained in his bed, eyes wide, seemingly incapable of anything coherent.

"What's wrong, James?" he tossed his head habitually, clearing some of the hair from his eyes. "Afraid you'll hurt me? I think you know better."

James took a menacing step forward, a hand catching Remus in the chest and pushing him backwards as he tried to stop him.

"You know I can take it James. Go ahead; hit me for insulting your lady friend."

"Padfoot shut up!" but before Remus could move to stop the two again, James had launched himself at Sirius, knocking the other boy clean over the other side of the bed. They landed in a heaped mess, one of them crying out in pain. Sirius struggled to get out from beneath his friend and managed to serve him a blow to the face before James could properly orient himself. Spurred by the blow, he seized his advantage and slugged Sirius in the back. He then scrambled to his feet, panting as Sirius slowly rose before him. Neither paid Peter any heed as he rushed past them.

Sirius wiped at the blood coming from his split lip, his eyes barely visible underneath his hair as he looked up at James. "That all you got four-eyes?"

James roughly shoved Sirius, his elbow catching Remus in the face, who backed away, clutching his stinging eye. "You mangy cur," he shoved the other again. "I've got plenty more than that."

When he moved to shove Sirius again the other met his attack and shoved back, but was caught so off guard by the blow to his face that he lost his footing and crashed into the bedside cabinet. James was on top of him a moment later and Sirius kicked out to be free of him. When James rolled onto the floor and Sirius flung himself at him once more, pinning the other's arms beneath his knees and raising his fist to strike. He paused when he registered the tears in the others eyes and Remus saw his opportunity and grabbed at Sirius' raised fist, yanking and pleading.

"What on earth?"

All three in the room looked up at the appalled voice of Professor McGonagall. She was in her nightclothes, Peter just behind her. "Mister Black! Get off him!"

Panting, Sirius slowly rose to his feet, Remus eyeing him then awkwardly attempting to help James to his feet. "You should be ashamed of yourselves!"

Sirius gingerly felt his throbbing arm as he eyed his head of house wearily. She looked fit to burst with the rage livid in her eyes. "Muggle dueling! In the middle of the night," she began to pace slightly, eyeing each in the room. "And with members of your own house! I really don't know what to say." She breathed hard through her flaring nostrils as she eyed the two combatants. "Thank Merlin Pettigrew came to fetch me. From the looks of it you two would have destroyed all of Gryffindor tower." She paced a bit more, the two panting boys in front of her gazing at the floor. "Explain yourselves!"

When neither answered she looked to Remus. "Lupin?"

He moved his mouth wordlessly then glanced at his two friends.

McGonagall snapped her head away in annoyance. "Potter?"

"It… it was personal, Professor."

She raised her eyebrows wildly. "Well not anymore it isn't, you've made sure of that."

James' cheeks reddened.

"He insulted another student, Professor," came Peter's meek voice from behind her.

She spun about to face him. "Go on."

He stared at his feet, his face turning redder by the second. "He insulted Evans, Professor. Then taunted James to hit him for it."

"Shut up, Peter."

McGonagall's head whipped about once more to focus on Sirius. Her eyes narrowed. "So you were the instigator of this duel, were you?"

Sirius shot a sideways glare at James before returning his attention to his head of house. "I was just tired of putting up with his shit is all, Professor."

Her eyes widened menacingly. "Watch your mouth, Black."

Remus heart sped at Sirius' gall as he spoke next. "What? Shit? I can say it whenever the bloody hell I want. Shit, shit, shit-" Remus clamped his hand over his friend's mouth.

McGonagall straightened to her full height and looked down at him over her bony nose. "Ten points from Gryffindor, from both of you, and a week's detention from you, Mr. Black, for disrespecting a teacher."

Both boys' postures seemed to wince with the verdict.

"And I want a formal, written apology, Mr. Black, is that clear?"

Sirius didn't answer.

McGonagall took a step forward and Sirius shifted, eyeing her through his veil of hair nervously.

"Is that clear?"

He nodded mutely.

She straightened again. "Good." As she turned to leave Sirius fixed Peter with a glare before shoving James out of his way. James pushed back, however, causing Remus to once again try to place himself between his two friends, his gaze warning. He hastily let go of Sirius' pajama sleeve, however, once he caught McGonagall's eye. Both James and Sirius followed his gaze to their head of house who they had assumed had left.

"I see I cannot trust you both to share sleeping quarters this night. Black," she extended her hand. "If you will come with me, I shall arrange for you to spend the night elsewhere."

"Why do I have to go?"

"Because for all intents and purposes you are the instigator of this mess." She waved her hand. "Gather your things, you shall spend the night in the hospital wing."

He wordlessly snatched his pillow and blanket off his bed then followed McGonagall out and down to the common room. His arm was throbbing horribly.

"Professor?"

McGonagall narrowed her eyes at him in response.

"Can I please go to the bathroom first, Professor?"

Her lips thinned. At least his voice had returned to the civil tone he usually used when speaking with her. "Make it snappy. I'll be waiting right here."

He set his bedding down on a chair then slipped silently into the toilets. Once inside, however, he let his shoulders droop as he took in a shuddering breath. What was wrong with him? Why had he taunted James so badly? He deserved what he'd gotten, he knew, but why couldn't he have swallowed his pride and backed off? James wasn't one of his parents, after all. His left arm gave another painful throb and he gingerly tugged at his sleeve. His wrist was beginning to swell and with a rush of heated anxiety he realized that he may have broken it when he fell from the bed.

Out of the corner of his eye he caught sight of a raggedy boy with a split lip and bruised eye hidden under his bangs. He sunk to the cold floor between the sinks as he fought to control his emotions. He'd looked McGonagall right in the eye and swore at her. He'd hurt James. He'd lost Gryffindor twenty points. And he'd have to face his parents in a few days' time and deal with his actions from over the summer. By the tone of her letter, his punishment was going to be severe.

He bit his lip as a sob threatened to escape, cradling his left arm in his right.

McGonagall shifted her weight, arching an eyebrow. She'd never thought she'd have to break up a fight between Potter and Black, much less have Black look her in the eye and blatantly disrespect and defy her. Hormones were definitely in control of that boy at the moment. He'd been uncharacteristically quiet and withdrawn for much of this term and now he had the gall to speak to her in such a manner? Absolutely unheard of!

She shifted her weight again, her patience all but gone. "Mr. Black?"

He tried to sink into himself. He didn't want to come out. He couldn't face the morning.

"Mr. Black, you've been in there for twenty minutes. I'm warning you, if you don't come out momentarily I am coming in!"

She waited about a minute more before flinging open the door, her eyes scanning the darkened bathroom and narrowing upon the shape huddled by the sinks. "It is nearly midnight, Mr. Black, you may be able to afford staying up all hours of the night but I assure you, I cannot. I have classes to teach." Sirius didn't look at her, nor did he move. "Oh come, on your feet!" She reached down and tugged on his arm as he began to rise, urging his haste.

As his left arm was pulled Sirius could barely suppress a gasp. McGonagall shot him an icy glare then shifted her grip to his upper arm as she led him out of the bathroom. Pausing only to stuff his bedding back into his free arm she marched him from Gryffindor tower and toward the hospital wing. "Your mother recently wrote to me requesting that I personally see to it that you leave Hogwarts for home this Holiday. I think now I understand why…"

His arm was on fire after having been unknowingly yanked by McGonagall and he was expending much of his energy to keep from gasping in pain and keeping up with her furious steps, much less speaking.

They arrived in the hospital wing and McGonagall all but shoved him away from her. Every bed was empty. "Now, take your pick. And good night, Mr. Black!"

He didn't move. As McGonagall neared the door she chanced a glance back at her student and felt her heart, for all the irritation and disappointment he had caused that night, take a moment to soften for the forlorn silhouette in the middle of the room, unmoving and still clutching his bedding to his chest.

Please Review!

Review Responses:

Phantasmal Abduction: What a fascinating and mysterious screen name you have! Thank you so much for your review! I hope you got the chance to read the actual first chapter other than the prologue. This site was being a bit annoying about actually displaying what I'd posted... but please, do tell me what you think!

Sache 8: Hello my sweet friend! How are you? Interesting take on the prologue! I wonder what your opinion is now? I'd love to hear it!

Padfoot: My Padfoot! Yes, poor Sirius. I know you can relate to it. ;o) Love ya Padmeister!

EsScaper: I know, poor Sirius, and yes, you're right, you can't be mad at James and Lily. It's not really their fault, you know? But he's looking for someone to lash out at... If you didn't like last chapter then this one must be a bit much. But I'd love to hear your thoughts! Thank you for reading!

paige-rossi-black: Ah, acoording to your name you must be a relation of Sirius'? ;o) I hope you enjoyed this chapter, even if it didn't quite go how I know you would have wanted it to, lol. I'd love to hear your thoughts, my friend. Take care!