A/N- Thank you soo much for all the reviews, they helped me immensely in
writing this chapter! Now, to answer a few questions:
LizEvans- this story is going to be both Maria/Michael, and Liz/Max, although it's not exactly primarily a romance. It is about Maria and Liz finding themselves again, and trying to heal and find their pasts. Of course, there's romance, hehe. You can't expect any less from a Radiogirl story!
Alvarezrai- there will be one chapter from Maria's point of view coming up in the future. I'm adding it because it's a chapter that would be much to hard to write from Liz's POV, so look for that soon to come.
Again, thank you! And please review!
--Miles To Go Chapter 3--
"If you're cold, I'll keep you warm. If you're low, just hold on. Because I will be your safety, oh, just don't leave home."
-Dido "Don't Leave Home"
I looked back at Maria as she trailed behind me, her eyes shifting nervously from side to side, trying to pretend like she didn't know where we were. She didn't want to be here, I could tell. But the beauty about Maria, was that she would do it anyway- just for me. She was ready to face her fears, face the terrors we left behind, to try and help me. I knew that Roswell held our answers, and I was hoping that Roswell would also still hold the happiness we'd left behind in our childhood.
Leaving Roswell, Maria and I had both had to grow up very fast. We never talked about the life we left behind, never admitted that when we were silent eating dinners, we were both thinking about Alex.
Alex- our best friend, oh how we longed for him. Every day, it seemed, there were at least twenty things that reminded me of him. From a joke on the television, to the worn pages of my Robert Frost poem book. Alex was hiding around every corner, reflecting in every drop of rain that fell from the sky. Maria and I couldn't talk about it because secretly, we both knew the darkness of each other's mourning, because it was exactly what we were feeling deep inside our own heart.
I stopped in front of the door, and once again looked back at Maria's eyes, lowered toward the ground and refusing to let me see in her eyes exactly what I knew was there- fear.
I reached my hand up and knocked quickly, before I could convince myself this wasn't the right move. I knew if I hesitated, that I, too, would show the fear in my eyes. Fear of everything we knew, and everything we didn't know at the same time, everything we were scared to know.
I heard the door open, and I looked up slowly and caught Michael's eyes. The memories began to rush through my mind, flowing freely, the floodgates of the past finally opening up to me. As I looked at Michael I remembered the warm summer days in the desert, watching Maria smile when she looked in his eyes, seeing Maria cry into his shoulder after the death of our happiness.
Michael's eyes flicked away from mine and quickly landed on Maria. I saw the breath escape from his lips as he looked upon her for the first time. The girl he'd been thinking about for years, finally standing where he'd always dreamed, right in front of him in true, vibrant color.
"Maria," he said softly, and I watched as Maria's eyes raised slowly from the ground, and straight into his, searching his soul again just as she had so many times in the past. I saw her facial expression flutter, and I saw the tears begin to brim her eyes as she stared upon his familiar features.
"Come in," Michael said, looking at me again and stepping aside, allowing us to enter his apartment. When I walked in, it was like nothing had changed. Everything was the same, from the Metallica poster plastered on the wall, to the worn couch where Max and I had tried to find his past so long ago.
Max, my heart pounded in my chest as the memory of that night quickly flashed into my brain. My eyes quickly scanned the room, scared at who I would find, not yet knowing if I was ready to face him. When I found the room empty, I felt my heart slow. I looked over at Michael and saw him looking at me.
"They're not here," he said, reading my mind. "I- I haven't told them that you're back yet. I didn't know if you wanted them to know." He said, casting a glance over toward Maria.
I, too, looked at Maria and saw her standing awkwardly at the door. She still hadn't said a word, and I knew she was overwhelmed by the memories that this apartment made her remember. I watched as Michael scanned her features. His forehead creased in worry as he looked at her frail frame, observed the deep bags under her eyes, took in the gaunt paleness of her face. I knew that her appearance had startled him, this was a Maria he had never known, how could he have? He had never heard Maria's sobs echoing through the night as she dreamt about Alex, watched her stare out the window into the gray skies before a thunderstorm, as she commented to me that the sky was exactly the color of Michael's eyes. He hadn't known, because we couldn't let him know. Our weakness was our secret, and that secret was all we had left from this place. Our only piece left yet unturned.
I took Maria's hand and led her over to the couch, and sat her down. I took a seat next to her and watched as Michael sat in the chair across from us, his eyes never leaving Maria. For the first time, when I looked in his eyes, I could see in Michael the pain he was feeling. We had hurt him when we left Roswell, caused him an aching pain that would never cease. I'd never thought about what we would do to them when we left, I'd only thought of what they'd done to us and what Roswell would do to us if we didn't leave this place.
"Where were you guys?" He asked softly, the pain showing through in his voice as he looked over at us. "We looked for you for months, we looked everywhere but we couldn't find you. Everywhere we went, you were one step ahead of us. Max, he wouldn't give up, it was driving him crazy. We- we just didn't know how you could have left." I heard Michael's voice crack and he cast his eyes toward the ground, not letting us see the emotion in his voice.
I looked toward Maria to see if she felt like answering, but her expression was still blank. I decided to speak for us both. "We weren't that far from here, just far enough away so no one would recognize us, and far enough away so we wouldn't hear the word 'Roswell' every day. We finally settled and bought a house, and that's where we've been." I looked toward Maria and saw her staring at me. I hadn't told Michael about the year Maria disappeared. I didn't tell him about how I worried every night, knowing she was gone, and not knowing what pain she was going through. I left that for Michael to find out himself, he needed to find out his answers on his own.
Maria's glance drifted away from me, and I watched as it locked with Michael. He held her gaze steadily, and they searched each other's eyes. I could tell Michael desperately wanted to know why Maria was so frail, what lay in the darkness of her eyes. He wanted to know why she was so scared, why she couldn't talk to him. He wanted to heal the one he'd loved so much for years.
I watched as Maria looked at him. Slowly, I watched as her mouth opened, forming the shape of his name. A name she'd refused to speak for years. The day we'd left Roswell was the last day I'd heard his name leave her mouth. She was afraid, and she felt that if she erased him from her vocabulary, it would erase him from her mind. She'd never succeeded in forgetting him.
"Michael," she whispered, her voice barely audible. I watched as the tears escaped from her eyes, running down her pale cheeks, saying the name she'd longed to hear herself say for years. At the sound of his voice, Michael's face brightened, and I watched as his eyes searched hers, trying to show her that he was the same person. He needed her to know that he hadn't changed, and in her absence, he had only grown better.
The moment stretched out, and encased the room, wrapping us all in a feeling of affection as we realized, some things may never change. I felt my heart warm as I watched the two. I knew that Maria was beginning to find herself again, and that Roswell would eventually heal her open wounds. Roswell was the answer, I'd always known that, I'd just tried to run away from that fact. I'd tried to pretend that it was only our past- nothing but something I needed to forget.
A noise at the door broke the spell that was cast over the room. I heard the sound of a key turning in the lock, and I looked over toward Michael. His expression had fallen again, and his eyes darted from the door to me, and I saw the regret in his eye. The door began to open, and I knew who would step through the threshold even before his face was revealed.
"Michael, I thought I told you to call me this morning." He said as he walked through, not glancing into the room before shutting the door behind him. "I waited for an hour before I. . ." He turned around and his gaze fell on me, and his mouth stopped moving. He took a step back, and looked from me, to Maria, to Michael, and back to me, and I watched as he began to register what was going on, that I was no longer only a figment of his imagination.
"Liz," he said slowly, and my heart began to beat faster. I'd forgotten that when Max said my name, the word sounded almost magical on his lips.
LizEvans- this story is going to be both Maria/Michael, and Liz/Max, although it's not exactly primarily a romance. It is about Maria and Liz finding themselves again, and trying to heal and find their pasts. Of course, there's romance, hehe. You can't expect any less from a Radiogirl story!
Alvarezrai- there will be one chapter from Maria's point of view coming up in the future. I'm adding it because it's a chapter that would be much to hard to write from Liz's POV, so look for that soon to come.
Again, thank you! And please review!
--Miles To Go Chapter 3--
"If you're cold, I'll keep you warm. If you're low, just hold on. Because I will be your safety, oh, just don't leave home."
-Dido "Don't Leave Home"
I looked back at Maria as she trailed behind me, her eyes shifting nervously from side to side, trying to pretend like she didn't know where we were. She didn't want to be here, I could tell. But the beauty about Maria, was that she would do it anyway- just for me. She was ready to face her fears, face the terrors we left behind, to try and help me. I knew that Roswell held our answers, and I was hoping that Roswell would also still hold the happiness we'd left behind in our childhood.
Leaving Roswell, Maria and I had both had to grow up very fast. We never talked about the life we left behind, never admitted that when we were silent eating dinners, we were both thinking about Alex.
Alex- our best friend, oh how we longed for him. Every day, it seemed, there were at least twenty things that reminded me of him. From a joke on the television, to the worn pages of my Robert Frost poem book. Alex was hiding around every corner, reflecting in every drop of rain that fell from the sky. Maria and I couldn't talk about it because secretly, we both knew the darkness of each other's mourning, because it was exactly what we were feeling deep inside our own heart.
I stopped in front of the door, and once again looked back at Maria's eyes, lowered toward the ground and refusing to let me see in her eyes exactly what I knew was there- fear.
I reached my hand up and knocked quickly, before I could convince myself this wasn't the right move. I knew if I hesitated, that I, too, would show the fear in my eyes. Fear of everything we knew, and everything we didn't know at the same time, everything we were scared to know.
I heard the door open, and I looked up slowly and caught Michael's eyes. The memories began to rush through my mind, flowing freely, the floodgates of the past finally opening up to me. As I looked at Michael I remembered the warm summer days in the desert, watching Maria smile when she looked in his eyes, seeing Maria cry into his shoulder after the death of our happiness.
Michael's eyes flicked away from mine and quickly landed on Maria. I saw the breath escape from his lips as he looked upon her for the first time. The girl he'd been thinking about for years, finally standing where he'd always dreamed, right in front of him in true, vibrant color.
"Maria," he said softly, and I watched as Maria's eyes raised slowly from the ground, and straight into his, searching his soul again just as she had so many times in the past. I saw her facial expression flutter, and I saw the tears begin to brim her eyes as she stared upon his familiar features.
"Come in," Michael said, looking at me again and stepping aside, allowing us to enter his apartment. When I walked in, it was like nothing had changed. Everything was the same, from the Metallica poster plastered on the wall, to the worn couch where Max and I had tried to find his past so long ago.
Max, my heart pounded in my chest as the memory of that night quickly flashed into my brain. My eyes quickly scanned the room, scared at who I would find, not yet knowing if I was ready to face him. When I found the room empty, I felt my heart slow. I looked over at Michael and saw him looking at me.
"They're not here," he said, reading my mind. "I- I haven't told them that you're back yet. I didn't know if you wanted them to know." He said, casting a glance over toward Maria.
I, too, looked at Maria and saw her standing awkwardly at the door. She still hadn't said a word, and I knew she was overwhelmed by the memories that this apartment made her remember. I watched as Michael scanned her features. His forehead creased in worry as he looked at her frail frame, observed the deep bags under her eyes, took in the gaunt paleness of her face. I knew that her appearance had startled him, this was a Maria he had never known, how could he have? He had never heard Maria's sobs echoing through the night as she dreamt about Alex, watched her stare out the window into the gray skies before a thunderstorm, as she commented to me that the sky was exactly the color of Michael's eyes. He hadn't known, because we couldn't let him know. Our weakness was our secret, and that secret was all we had left from this place. Our only piece left yet unturned.
I took Maria's hand and led her over to the couch, and sat her down. I took a seat next to her and watched as Michael sat in the chair across from us, his eyes never leaving Maria. For the first time, when I looked in his eyes, I could see in Michael the pain he was feeling. We had hurt him when we left Roswell, caused him an aching pain that would never cease. I'd never thought about what we would do to them when we left, I'd only thought of what they'd done to us and what Roswell would do to us if we didn't leave this place.
"Where were you guys?" He asked softly, the pain showing through in his voice as he looked over at us. "We looked for you for months, we looked everywhere but we couldn't find you. Everywhere we went, you were one step ahead of us. Max, he wouldn't give up, it was driving him crazy. We- we just didn't know how you could have left." I heard Michael's voice crack and he cast his eyes toward the ground, not letting us see the emotion in his voice.
I looked toward Maria to see if she felt like answering, but her expression was still blank. I decided to speak for us both. "We weren't that far from here, just far enough away so no one would recognize us, and far enough away so we wouldn't hear the word 'Roswell' every day. We finally settled and bought a house, and that's where we've been." I looked toward Maria and saw her staring at me. I hadn't told Michael about the year Maria disappeared. I didn't tell him about how I worried every night, knowing she was gone, and not knowing what pain she was going through. I left that for Michael to find out himself, he needed to find out his answers on his own.
Maria's glance drifted away from me, and I watched as it locked with Michael. He held her gaze steadily, and they searched each other's eyes. I could tell Michael desperately wanted to know why Maria was so frail, what lay in the darkness of her eyes. He wanted to know why she was so scared, why she couldn't talk to him. He wanted to heal the one he'd loved so much for years.
I watched as Maria looked at him. Slowly, I watched as her mouth opened, forming the shape of his name. A name she'd refused to speak for years. The day we'd left Roswell was the last day I'd heard his name leave her mouth. She was afraid, and she felt that if she erased him from her vocabulary, it would erase him from her mind. She'd never succeeded in forgetting him.
"Michael," she whispered, her voice barely audible. I watched as the tears escaped from her eyes, running down her pale cheeks, saying the name she'd longed to hear herself say for years. At the sound of his voice, Michael's face brightened, and I watched as his eyes searched hers, trying to show her that he was the same person. He needed her to know that he hadn't changed, and in her absence, he had only grown better.
The moment stretched out, and encased the room, wrapping us all in a feeling of affection as we realized, some things may never change. I felt my heart warm as I watched the two. I knew that Maria was beginning to find herself again, and that Roswell would eventually heal her open wounds. Roswell was the answer, I'd always known that, I'd just tried to run away from that fact. I'd tried to pretend that it was only our past- nothing but something I needed to forget.
A noise at the door broke the spell that was cast over the room. I heard the sound of a key turning in the lock, and I looked over toward Michael. His expression had fallen again, and his eyes darted from the door to me, and I saw the regret in his eye. The door began to open, and I knew who would step through the threshold even before his face was revealed.
"Michael, I thought I told you to call me this morning." He said as he walked through, not glancing into the room before shutting the door behind him. "I waited for an hour before I. . ." He turned around and his gaze fell on me, and his mouth stopped moving. He took a step back, and looked from me, to Maria, to Michael, and back to me, and I watched as he began to register what was going on, that I was no longer only a figment of his imagination.
"Liz," he said slowly, and my heart began to beat faster. I'd forgotten that when Max said my name, the word sounded almost magical on his lips.
