I am feeling very creative... this is my third update today!


Ed stomped in the door, glowering. It had been a terrible couple of days. First the hangover and the makeup, then the nail polish wouldn't come off, then he'd been thwarted in his attempt at righteous vengeance/then/ he'd been knocked unconscious by a wrench, and after all that, he'd gotten mauled by Winry for getting polish on his automail!

And today was no better. Already he'd tripped over a rock and landed face-first in the dirt. He growled menacingly. Anyone who got too close to him today- he stopped. Not only was no one close to him, no one seemed to be anywhere.

He checked Roy's office. Empty. Hawkeye was nowhere to be seen. Had a holiday been declared and he didn't notice?

He noticed a light on in Havoc's office. He was somewhat suspicious, but curiosity got the better of him and he opened the door.

"Surprise!" everyone yelled. Everyone except Havoc, who was trying in vain to wriggle his way out of the ropes he was tied up with.

Ed gaped. "Wh…what… why?"

Roy came forward and patted his shoulder. "Just think of it as a reward for being a loyal dog of the military."

"He didn't want you blowing up the building," Hawkeye translated. Roy ignored her.

"Or torturing more innocent bystanders," Breda muttered.

Hawkeye added, "This grudge has also disrupted everyone's work. The sooner you get your revenge, the sooner everyone can finish their paperwork without fear of a localized armageddon."

She had a point there, Ed had to admit.

Roy started talking again. "There are a few rules, however. Please do not kill, cripple, maim, disable, seriously harm-" Havoc was wincing at every word, but looking slightly relieved. "-or otherwise physically torture him. It's too much paperwork, and he is somewhat useful at times."

Havoc turned a baleful glare on him. Then he looked pleadingly at Fury, who was standing by looking mildly horrified.

"Come on, everyone," Roy announced. "Let's let him work in peace. There're supplies in the corner, Fullmetal." Everyone left, though they had to drag Fury out with them.

Ed, alone with his victim, flashed a toothy grin and started digging through the pile of 'supplies'. "Hmm… hair dye, lime jello… lime jello? Weird. Ooh! What a pretty dress!" He turned to the cowering sniper. "And I think it's just your size, too…"


"Um, it's been awfully quiet in there," Fury said, a while later.

"Good," Roy replied. "The screaming was starting to get annoying."

"Shouldn't we check on him, sir? I mean, he could be in trouble."

The colonel smirked. "He was in trouble since he took that bet. At least this way, he won't be in serious pain. A little public humiliation never hurt anyone."

Fury wasn't so sure.


Whee! Thanks to Kori hime, Anime Monster, Safire Flame, and others for being such faithful reviewers! And special thanks to my friend Courtney for putting up with my shoving fics at her to proofread!

...I think I've had enough caffeine now...(passes out)

(wakes up) Anyone have any ideas for Havoc's punishment? I've got a few ideas, but suggestions always help!