Crossroads of the Heart
Author's Note: Fire Emblem is the property of Intelligent Systems and Nintendo.
Chapter 20: Confrontations
Lyn peered outside through an open window in her room, drawing the curtains aside and looking rather wistful as she observed the outside world. Granted, it wasn't so much a window as a woefully thin rectangle cut into the wall of stone that separated her from the outside world. She sighed; behind her, she heard Florina do the same. The girl had stuck close by her ever since their talk of several days ago; of course, Lyn didn't mind – she was happy to be spending time with her best friend again, actually. She'd nearly forgotten how nice it was to have Florina to talk to all the time.
"Lyn… how long are we going to stay here?"
"Hmm… I thought you liked it here in Caelin?" Lyn turned away from the window to eye Florina curiously. "Change your mind?"
"It's not that… it's just, you can't hide here forever…"
"I know that…" Lyn frowned. "I do."
Florina gave her a look that indicated she didn't quite believe her. Lyn turned back to the window, not wanting to face those disappointed eyes…
"You can't avoid him forever… Lyn, you know how Lord Hector is… he probably already has all of his spies working to find out where you went… if you don't go back to him, he'll probably come after you…"
"You think so?" Lyn raised an eyebrow, though she didn't turn back to face her friend. "Do you think he could get away from Ostia now, when he's supposed to be ruling it?"
"…I think he'd find a way," Florina nodded.
"Maybe you're right…" Lyn took a few steps back from the window, turning slowly around. "Wouldn't it be funny if I were to go back to Ostia, right now, and we got there only to find Hector had gone?"
"That's not why you haven't gone," Florina scolded her, but she smiled back just the same. It would be just her luck, lately, really.
"True, but..." A soft tap at the door interrupted her, and she directed her gaze toward it, looking slightly surprised. "…it's possible isn't it? One moment!" Lyn strode purposefully toward the door, pulling it open to admit a rather scandalized looking attendant. The woman bowed low as Lyn opened the door; though the scowl did not leave her face.
"Milady Lyndis…" The woman managed in a flustered voice. "You have a visitor – they arrived not too long ago – a Pegasus flew right over the gates; we nearly shot her right down, we did – and then the man with her all but insisted on being brought straightaway to milady's rooms! Now, I told him right off that sort of conduct—"
"A man?"
"A Pegasus?"
Lyn and Florina exchanged glances.
"I'll see him," Lyn announced, taking on a determined expression.
"He's waiting just downstairs, milady, if you'll follow me," the attendant bowed respectfully once more, beckoning for Lyn to follow. She obliged, casting a meaningful glance over her shoulder at a suddenly rather pale looking Florina. The Pegasus knight watched her go, remaining rooted to the spot she stood at for a good several minutes after Lyn had disappeared from her sight.
"Oh, please be Fiora with Hector, and not Farina with…" She trailed off, moving out of the room, stalking down the hall purposefully. She'd find out.
It didn't take long, of course, for Florina to locate the attendant that had alerted them of Lyn's visitor; though Lyn herself had disappeared somewhere with whoever it was, Florina noted, after a cursory glance about the hall downstairs revealed that her friend had departed.
"Um… e-excuse me…" Florina spoke in a tone that was just barely audible; the woman turned with a severe expression that softened considerably when she realized who was addressing her.
"Yes, Miss Florina?"
"Er, you said something about a, ah… a Pegasus? Eh… where…"
"Oh, of course! My apologies, Miss, I wasn't even thinking… she insisted on staying outside, actually, didn't seem to keen at all on coming in… acting rather strange, that one…"
"I… I see. Thank you…" Florina felt her hopes sink straight through the floor. Fiora wouldn't have had any reservations about coming inside; Farina, on the other hand, would be avoiding Lyn at all costs, for obvious reasons… Florina felt a surge of anger pass through her, and she straightened up considerably, her eyes dark. She had a thing or two to say to her sister, that was certain.
She strode through the hall and outside, leaving the cool interior of the castle for the warm midday weather of the courtyard, her eyes searching purposefully. There were gathered knights, a few serving women and attendants lounging about, presumably taking a break from their duties… and there, not far from the gate, with her back turned to her… Florina marched toward her sister, anger flashing in her eyes.
"I suppose I don't have to ask why you're here," She spoke in an accusing tone, when she was within speaking distance, surprising herself by keeping the tremor entirely out of her voice. Farina jumped, turning away from her Pegasus to face her younger sister.
"Florina. I see you managed to keep Lyn here, after all! And to think, I thought you'd have her running back to Ostia – I was so sure she'd already be gone by the time we finally got here, stupid stubborn man refusing to leave his horse in Sacae and ride with me—"
"I did not keep her here!" Florina interrupted furiously, glaring openly at her sister. "How could you even think such a thing! I tried to get her to go back – I'm still trying, every day, and I'd almost convinced her, too!"
"Then it's a good thing I got here in time, isn't it?" Farina grinned. Florina stared.
"No! It most certainly is not! Lyn told me what you did – how could you! After I asked you over and over to stop with your stupid plans…"
"I really wish you'd knock off that act; you can't look me in the eye and honestly say you're upset about the situation—"
"Yes I can! Look at me! For once in your life, look at me, and understand what I'm saying!" Florina shouted, tears of anger and frustration welling in her eyes. "I hate what you are doing! I hate it!"
A group had gathered, now, taking interest in the steadily escalating shouts. Florina paid them no mind; Farina shifted uncomfortably.
"You're meddling in people's lives – you're ruining people's lives! People that I care about! Do you think I ever wanted to see Lyn so upset? That I ever wanted to see Lord Hector so heartbroken? Oh, that's right – you weren't there to see it, were you? You left before you could even see the consequences of your stupid actions!"
"In the long run—"
"I don't care about the long run! I don't know what you're expecting to happen, but I suspect you have these… these delusions that if you can just get Lyn and Hector apart, I'll go running in to him to take her place – and you're wrong! Do you understand? I don't want it – I don't even want him if it means making so many people unhappy along the way – but no matter how many times I say that, you just… you don't listen! And now look what you've done, you've ruined everything!"
"Oh, please – you don't know what you're talking about!" Farina shot back, a thread of anger working its way into her as well. "You're going on and on about people being unhappy right now – yeah, so? So Lyn's a little upset now – would you rather her be unhappy for a few days right now, or miserable the rest of her life, caged up in a castle when she'd rather be wandering on the plains with her people? Have you even considered that?"
"Don't pretend to know Lyn better than I do, Farina – you… you don't know her at all!"
"Well, you're sure acting like you don't know her – and you didn't answer my question!"
"And what about Hector! You haven't considered his feelings in the least, and he's probably the person you've hurt the most –"
"Give me a break, you're worried about him, now? What, do you think he's some sort of weak willed child – hell, you're the one who likes him so much, I'd figured you knew him better than that!"
"I hardly know him at all! Or haven't you been listening to a word I've said! And you weren't there to see… to see the way he looked when Lyn and I left – Farina, if you could have… but, no! I don't suppose it would have mattered to you, would it have?"
"Florina, Hector'll get over it. Lyn will get over it. You're acting like this is the end of the world, when all I've done is set up a better beginning for everyone—"
"You can't possibly be callous enough to believe that to be true…"
"And you can't possibly be dense enough not to see that it is! Or are you so committed to martyring yourself that your mind just refuses to accept that there might be a way for everyone to be happy – including you!"
The crowd in the courtyard that had taken notice of them, comprised primarily of servants to Castle Caelin, many of whom sported rather loose tongues, let out a collective whisper, a shuddering sigh. It was not often so many things worth of paltry gossip were revealed to the common folk at once; more than one young attendant slunk away from the gathering circle, so great was the urge to tell their friends, to spread the word.
For who doesn't enjoy a good tale concerning the love lives of knights and nobles?
It was not surprising, then, that word of the confrontation in the courtyard spread quickly around Castle Caelin, though perhaps it is surprising that one of the first persons that should have known about it turned out to be one of the last.
Lyn had known it would be either Rath or Hector come to see her; she'd expected the latter, but instead saw the former, standing there with a look on his face she'd never quite seen before, a look that made her knees weak, but at the same time, ignited a very recognizable feeling of anger within her – what was he doing here? Hector, at least, would have had a viable reason to show up at her doorstep.
"Rath," She spoke, unable to keep the biting tone from her voice.
"Lyn… I…" He studied her for a moment, and then nodded. "You do not wish for me to be here. That is… understandable."
"Why are you here?" Lyn managed to keep her voice level, though her displeasure was evident. "I don't mean to be rude, but…"
"I am not offended," Rath interrupted her. The distance between them seemed very long… impassable. He took a step back. "I knew before I left that you would feel this way about my arrival… and yet, I could not keep myself away."
"Rath…" She felt her anger fading away. She couldn't remain angry, not when he looked at her that way. Not when he spoke in that tone.
"I was told about the events in Ostia," He continued, and she stiffened slightly – not very many people knew what had happened to begin with, and certainly none of them had been in contact with Rath. She frowned, turning the information over in her mind. "And I thought to myself, if what I heard was true… would you not have returned to the plains? No… I could not work out the reasoning, no matter how long I considered it…"
"It has always been my plan to return…" Lyn admitted, looking away. "From the moment I left, it was my intention to return. Every decision I have made contrary to that path has led to pain."
"And there you have your answer – the answer to your question… of why I am here," Rath spoke softly, his eyes calling hers back to them, boring into her own with an intensity she both hated and loved; a passion that called to her most private thoughts. "I could not stand to think of you in such pain… I thought that even if I were to arrive, and replace that pain with anger… it would be worth it, just to stave off your tears."
"Rath, that's…"
"That is the way I feel. I would rather see you myself and have your eyes fixed on me this way, flashing with anger – I would rather see you furious with me and resembling the sometimes stubborn, always strong plainswoman I fell in love with… than to sit back at our home and think of you, a shadow of the woman I love, steeped in sorrow and alone, locked within these cold stone walls… that is why I came."
"You… Rath, you shouldn't have come… you shouldn't be here, not now, saying things like that…" Lyn closed her eyes, fighting down a wave of emotion. It was no easy task.
"I understand if you do not return my feelings, but my heart will never change. …I wanted you to know that, before you made your decision… in case I was not clear enough, last we met."
"You were…" Lyn shook her head. "I knew. How could I not? I've been going on for so long, pretending not to see things that I did not wish to see, pretending that things weren't spiraling out of control like they so obviously were – how could I have been so childish? So unfair to everyone, including myself?"
"I have never thought of you as childish," Rath insisted, crossing his arms.
"Not you… no one has, but that's the way I've been behaving! I've been running away, rather than facing what I must… I'm not worthy to be called a plainswoman at all, the way I've been—"
"Never say that." Rath interrupted, his voice hard and insistent. "Never. You are a plainswoman, and you always will be – the decisions you make now will never change that, the core of what you are. It is impossible for you to be anyone else, Lyn – and you have always been, from the very beginning, a woman of the plains. No matter who you are trying to be, you cannot change what you are…"
"…Sometimes, I wish I could…" Lyn took a breath, studying his impassive face for a moment before continuing. "All this time here, pretending to be the noble Lady Lyndis of Caelin, when at heart, I never wanted the title… I often wish I could have changed myself to fit in with that persona, to honor my mother's memory, to be what everyone expected…"
"And in pleasing everyone else, you've only hurt yourself."
"And everyone around me!"
"…Lyn. Even knowing this… you came here, instead of returning to the plains…"
"I'm not going to try to explain," Lyn replied, understanding his confusion. "…I can't. It's too…"
"I understand," Rath nodded. "…I've had my say. I am satisfied, no matter your decision."
"…Rath, I need to ask you something."
"…What is it?"
"How…" She swallowed. "How did you find out about what… what happened in Ostia?"
"…That? The woman I arrived with—"
"Milady Lyndis!" A flustered voice interrupted them, a harried looking woman bowing low before continuing, her face red with excitement and her breath quick from running. "Forgive the interruption, but it is urgent—"
"What's happened?" Lyn immediately assumed a very business-like demeanor; Rath himself was admittedly impressed at how quickly her defenses went back up, how swiftly she assumed the role of the noble lady she never wanted to be in the first place. She was truly an amazing woman, he noted, and he barely kept the frown he felt from his face.
"It's Lady Florina, she and that woman that arrived earlier on that Pegasus – they're in the courtyard, and it's just chaos, I think it could come to blows any minute—"
"Florina?" Lyn gaped at her for a moment, and then two pieces of information seemed to click in her mind. She nearly choked at the sudden realization. "Rath, the woman you arrived with – A Pegasus Knight – She was…" She whirled around to face him, and he studied her with a look of mild surprise.
"Yes, a Pegasus Knight," Rath nodded. "She told me everything… though she didn't act as though it were a secret," He added. He watched as Lyn's eyes narrowed, her expression very quickly taking on a look of unbridled fury. He shifted uncomfortably. "Lyn… are you all right?"
"That woman." Lyn hissed, and Rath blinked at her tone. "She told you the story, did she?" Lyn laughed, a bitter laugh that held not even the slightest bit of mirth. Rath allowed himself the slightest expression of surprise at her change in demeanor. "I bet she left at least one thing out – perhaps the most important thing of all! Did she tell you, Rath? That she was the one who… who…" Lyn cut her tirade off abruptly, turning back to the gaping attendant at the threshold. "Where is she!"
"Th-this way, my lady…" The woman bowed again, trembling both in awe of the furious expression Lyn wore and excitement over the confrontation she could sense on the horizon. She nearly tripped over herself on the way out, Lyn following close at her heels, eyes still narrowed in that frightening way.
Rath watched them go, having figured a thing or two out himself in the past few minutes. If Farina was the one Lyn had caught with Hector… he frowned. It made sense, suddenly – her insistence that he come with her, that desperate tone she spoke in that she tried so hard to conceal… as though she could fool him.
Yet, he thought, in the end… she had fooled them all. His face tightened.
"This has never been about my happiness – you've always delighted in making my life miserable – even back then! You'd tell those stupid stories to make me cry, you'd go on and on about—"
"—I have done nothing that I didn't think was in your best interest! Nothing! Maybe if you cared as much about yourself as you do about other people you'd see that!"
"Maybe if you cared as much about other people as I do you would have never thought up this whole ridiculous scheme! If you cared half as much!"
Lyn could hear their shouts long before she arrived, one sounding less like her best friend than she'd ever heard before, and one incensing her further every time she heard the voice – how dare that woman, after what she'd done before – how dare she come here, to Caelin, with Rath, as though… as though it was her right to dictate her affairs! Had she planned the whole thing? What on earth was her aim – did she think that she had a chance with Hector, if only she were out of the picture? She was out of her mind!
She was nearly shaking with fury, with indignation – just what was that woman after? It didn't make any sense, not in the least! And the way Florina was speaking… had she known? Was her best friend keeping some important detail concerning this whole affair from her? She had trouble believing that – Florina had never kept anything from her, as far as she knew… they'd always been up front with each other.
Weren't they best friends, after all?
Her hands tightened into fists. This whole affair had gone on far enough – it had reached its end. She stalked out onto the courtyard, the crowd of onlookers and the center of attraction plain before her. Neither noticed her approach; she wasn't surprised.
"Don't talk to me about caring for people – I've put myself on the line, I've risked everything for you! Everything, just to give you a chance at happiness, a chance to be with that stupid Lordling you care so for – I've never understood it, but did I question your judgement? No!"
"That is not the same – even if you knew – if you knew how I felt about Lord Hector, why couldn't you listen to anything else I said? Did you go deaf afterward, or were you simply blocking out what you didn't want to hear!"
Lyn had opened her mouth to get their attention, to call out that horrible woman standing before her, arguing with her best friend, to stop their bickering and give that foul woman an opponent more equal to the task.
Everything she had thought to say fled her thoughts at that moment, replaced by the words she'd just heard her best friend utter, reverberating in her head. She stared. Neither sister noticed her, standing there where the crowd had parted to let her pass.
"I was blocking out the things you never really wanted to say!" Farina snapped back, without missing a beat. "You can deny it all you like – fine! I don't care! But deep in that heart of yours, you know it's true – you know you wanted to see me succeed, and you know you wanted that chance I've been working so hard to give you. Go ahead and lie to me, and tell me it isn't true – that's fine. You're entitled to your denial!"
"I am not in denial!" Florina cried, shaking her head vehemently, looking at her sister with a horrified stare. "I would never trade the happiness of my friends for my own – I would never put my selfish, stupid, completely unreasonable desires before theirs – especially when what they wanted had a chance of happening! You've ruined it all – for nothing! Hector loves her, and driving her away isn't going to change that, it isn't going to magically make him love me instead, Farina!"
"It could have, if you showed a little more initiative! If you even bothered trying to make it happen—"
"I am not you!" Florina wailed, bursting finally into tears, and turning away from her sister – she wouldn't see it, no matter what she said, she was too far gone down her own delusional train of thought. She turned to run, to head back to the castle, to be anywhere but here, now.
She nearly ran right into Lyn, for though the crowd parted to let her pass, Lyn moved not a muscle, watching her best friend approach, tears streaming down her face. She was vaguely aware that she herself was crying, but she felt detached – as though she were watching herself from another body. A fitting way to experience a world gone mad, she supposed. She couldn't laugh.
Florina stopped herself just in time, her eyes widening as she saw Lyn standing there, looking at her with that blank expression, her cheeks wet with tears that she didn't seem to be aware of. The world seemed to turn to glass; she stood transfixed, as though afraid moving might shatter it before her eyes. How did things come to this...?
"Lyn…" Florina managed to choke out between sobs, and behind her, she heard her sister gasp – just as well, she didn't stand a chance against Lyn in a fight. Florina wondered briefly if she could stop Lyn if it came to that. "How long… how long have you…"
"Why didn't you tell me?" Lyn's expression hadn't changed, her gaze hadn't wavered, and Florina felt guilt stab at her like a knife twisting in her soul. Why hadn't she? She did not have an answer. She couldn't remember if one had ever existed.
Behind her, she heard her sister turn, heard her footsteps as she ran – she didn't blame her for that, either. Lyn's gaze flickered briefly toward Farina as she made her escape, but did not remain there long. Florina almost wished she'd run after her sister; she'd rather deal with that than this. Anything but this.
"I… I…"
"All of this time…" Lyn's eyes found hers again; Florina's stomach dropped away. "All of this time! You've listened to me talk about him, you've been there the entire way – you watched me fall in love with him – don't deny it! You were always there. And you never told me?"
"How… how…" Fresh tears welled from her eyes, falling down her cheeks. "How could I! How could I pretend I had a chance, when he was always looking at you that way—"
"He wasn't the only one!" Lyn shouted, and Florina whimpered, flinching visibly away from her. "He never was – and you never saw the other one, because you were always looking at Hector, and I never realized why, and you never told me!"
"I couldn't!" Florina sobbed, sinking into the grass, her legs trembling far too much to support her. "I didn't mean to tell her! No one should have known – no one! Never!" She took a shuddering breath, covering her face with her hands, sobbing uncontrollably into her open palms. I never meant for this. I never wanted this. I only wanted you to be happy.
Tears fell down Lyn's cheeks, as she looked down, observing her best friend, sobbing at her feet… her face softened, and she knelt in front of Florina herself, taking the lavender haired girl's hands in her own, pulling them away from her face. Florina looked at her with red eyes, a thousand apologies swimming in their depths, an undercurrent of fear in her eyes, and Lyn felt her heart break.
"Florina… Mother Earth and Father Sky, look at us." Lyn pulled her close, pulled her into her arms, and rocked her gently, there on the grass in the courtyard of Castle Caelin. "You should have told me… Florina… oh, Florina… if I had known…"
Florina made no reply – even if she could have thought of something to say, she doubted she could form any words under the weight of her sobs.
Farina checked her riding straps with shaking hands, an unreadable expression on her face, though her trembling was obvious. Murphy let out a nervous whinny beside her, sensing his companion's distress; Farina muttered something she hoped was soothing, hardly aware of the action even as she performed it. She was going on instinct, now – this was all mechanical. Routine.
She was lucky to have made it here; she'd sent a fearful glance over her shoulder more than once to make sure Lady Lyndis wasn't following her, as she'd expected. She was a fighter, but Lady Lyndis was a woman with quite a score to settle. Her heart skipped a beat. Oh yes, it was definitely time for her to go.
Her face tightened. She'd done all she could – all she could, everything she could, she'd handed Florina a golden opportunity – and the girl still insisted on throwing it all away. She'd hoped Florina would come to her senses before now, at least enough to know that Farina had been acting on her behalf – the things she'd said to her – it was ridiculous!
There was nothing more for her to do. They'd have to settle things themselves; her stomach twisted with anger, with indignation, when she thought that all of her plans might be for nothing after all. All because of her little sister's stupid inferiority complex!
"So, you're leaving…"
Her heart nearly stopped before she realized it wasn't a woman's voice, wasn't a certain noble woman's voice, but a man's. And a rather angry man's, at that.
"I am. Sorry for not telling you. Wasn't sure where you were."
"It wouldn't have been the first thing you neglected to tell me."
Farina didn't turn to face him; she knew what he was talking about. So Lyn had told him. That was fine. She didn't care anymore.
"What would that have accomplished?"
"You deceived me. You deceived us both – you lied to me, to get me here. To my face, without even a blink…"
"I am not a Sacaen," Farina laughed, shaking her head. "Do you think we all uphold your morals? We don't."
"I don't understand why," Rath ignored her, continuing on.
"I don't need to explain myself to you. You can be as angry at me as you like, but let me tell you – I've given you the exact same chance I've given Florina. You can throw it away like she insists on doing, or you can make something of it. I don't care. I'm finished with this entire business. Is that what you want to hear?"
"…I'm going back to Sacae," Rath replied quietly. "I am not certain of what you were trying to accomplish, or why you've done the things you have. I am not here to judge you, or condemn you… but…"
"I wasn't doing this for myself, if it makes you feel better," Farina finished securing Murphy's reins, snapping a few buckles, and hoisting herself onto his back. "I never was, no matter who believes it. Never."
Rath watched her go, realizing that despite her lies, despite how untrustworthy she'd proven herself to be… he wasn't sure who she was, or why she'd done the things she had done… but he found that he believed her now, her final words, with all his heart.
He believed her, but it didn't change her mistakes.
"…But the things you've done…" Rath whispered softly, when she had disappeared from sight, into the sky…
He shook his head, turning back toward where Lyn and that smaller girl with the lavender hair had been, wondering what he should do. If he should simply leave without saying anything… she certainly wouldn't want to be bothered, he supposed, judging by what he had heard as he passed them by to speak with Farina.
A few steps forward revealed that though the crowd had not yet dissipated, Lyn and Florina were nowhere to be seen. They'd likely gone inside, to get away from the crowd that had gathered there… there were excited gasps and breathless voices, already twisting the tale of what they had seen as only gossip could, and Rath frowned with distaste. He didn't blame them for leaving that lot.
He stood there for a time, debating his next course of action, unsure of what he should do, when another flurry of excitement caught his attention at the gate – far more bustle than should accompany a normal visit, he was sure. He edged nearer to the gate as it swung open to admit the new arrivals, and his mouth opened slightly in surprise as he saw who it was. More of Lyn's companions, and…
"Serra, I swear to Saint Elimine herself, if you start singing that song one more time—"
"Lord Hector! How dare you use Lady Elimine's name in such a tone, and to a sister of the faith, besides!"
"Your singing voice is enough to drive men mad – you can hardly blame me for a little blasphemy if that's what it takes to shut you up—"
"How rude! Sain, you like my singing, don't you? Tell Lord Hector that I have a gorgeous voice, go on!"
"Er…" Sain coughed politely, flushing slightly. "Serra, perhaps it would be best…"
"So you don't like my voice, either!" Serra looked rather shocked to hear this. "Well…!" She turned away, stomping in the opposite direction, and Sain hastened to her side, denial fervent on his lips.
"Now, hold on, I didn't say that, Serra, I adore your voice – I do!"
Hector watched them bustle off, his brow knitted in irritation even though the woman was finally, blessedly retreating out of earshot. How had he been convinced to let that woman accompany them? He couldn't fathom how he'd let it come about.
"Lord Hector…" Kent spoke softly at his side, and he turned to face him, his angry expression softening somewhat with worry for what was about to take place. Lyn would likely be finding out about his arrival soon now… he took a breath.
"Yeah… I'm all right."
"I've given an order to keep your arrival from Lady Lyndis… shall I go inform her myself…?" He offered, and Hector nodded.
"Yeah, that…"
"I don't think now would be a good time to approach her," Rath interrupted, and both men turned to gape at him; Rath kept his face carefully impassive. Kent took a few steps away from Hector and Rath, looking from one to the other with a bewildered expression. Fiora's expression mirrored his; they met eyes for a bare second.
"Fiora and I will… ah… we'll leave you to… yes." Kent bowed slightly, Fiora following suit at his side, and turned to retreat toward the castle. Whatever was about to take place there was none of his business, after all. None at all.
"You… you're…" Hector fumbled for words for a moment, remembering what Farina had said to him – Did you know she had someone waiting for her in Sacae?
"Lord Hector. It's been awhile," Rath greeted him formally, inclining his head respectfully. Hector vaguely noted that he'd never heard the man's voice before now.
"You're…" He floundered for a moment for a name; he thought for a moment that he wouldn't remember it. "Rath. What do you mean?"
"Lyn has had a… difficult day. I cannot speak for you, but I… I do not think it would be prudent, at this point…"
"You've been with her, here…" Hector shook his head, and Rath trailed off to hear him speak. "How did you know? Were you in on this whole thing with that girl—"
"I didn't know," Rath spoke quickly, understanding the suspicion, but feeling more than a little offended at the implication nonetheless. He was a Sacaen; a man of the Kutolah would never have agreed to such a scheme… it injured his honor to even be suspected of it. He frowned. "I've only worked everything out recently, myself. This entire situation… is regrettable."
"…All right. Fine. I'll…" Hector turned his gaze toward the castle, shaking his head. "I have to speak with her, no matter what's happened. I have to explain – If you know everything that's happened, you –"
"That is your right," Rath nodded, turning away. "I am going back to the plains…"
Hector blinked, turning to look at him, clearly surprised.
"But…"
"In the end, it is not us that will decide Lyn's future. Our words might influence her, and hold some significance, but I believe that, in her heart, she's already decided…"
"On what?" Hector's brows knitted angrily – was this man that arrogant?
"…Can't say," Rath shrugged, walking away from him with that calm expression on his face – Hector watched him go, wondering if he was right. The way he spoke, he sounded confident enough.
He wished he felt half as confident as that man looked.
But, he was no Sacaen, after all.
Lyn shut the door to her room behind her, after ushering Florina inside, both of them still sniffling like children.
"So, all of this time…" Lyn began, turning to face her friend, taking a breath to calm herself. "All of this time, your sister has been plotting this, because you've been in love with Hector."
Florina nodded, the tiniest of nods.
"Florina… do you understand how much of this could have been avoided, if you'd just told me…"
"How…?" Florina sniffed, rubbing at her eyes. "It would have only made things worse!"
"No, it wouldn't have." Lyn smiled sadly. "If I would have known, I would have never let myself fall in love with that man… I would have probably spent the entire time badgering you to tell him, and threatening him if he so much as thought about turning you down!"
"But…" Florina gaped at her. "But, Lyn, that wouldn't have been fair to you… to him…"
"Neither of us has been very fair…" Lyn sighed. "We've both made mistakes, and we're paying for it now, aren't we? Look at us. I haven't cried this much since Grandfather…" she trailed off.
"I'm sorry…" Florina whispered softly. "It's all my fault, isn't it…? I… I always cause trouble… without meaning to – I never meant all this…"
"I know… I know you didn't, Florina… and it's not all your fault, it's mostly mine – if I had been paying any attention to you at all, maybe I would have seen it myself!"
"No, Lyn… that's not…"
"But I didn't, I didn't see anything at all. I couldn't see this entire stupid situation unfolding right before my eyes!"
"I never would have expected you to, this whole thing is so out of control…" Florina sniffed. "It's all just…"
"Crazy," Lyn finished for her, and she smiled. "Florina… I have to admit… I don't really understand how…" She raised an eyebrow, and Florina managed to smile back.
"You think I do? Lyn… it's so silly. I just… I can't explain it, I just…"
"I think I know what you mean…" Lyn nodded. "It's just a feeling you get, and I wouldn't expect you to explain it… I know I can't."
"It's just… he saved my life, and ever since…"
"He did?" Lyn eyed her in surprise. "When was that?"
"I never really got the chance to tell you what happened that time…" Florina sighed, sinking onto the edge of the bed, swinging her legs and staring at the floor. "When Laus attacked, remember?"
"Yes… I sent you to find Eliwood, in Laus."
"He wasn't in Laus, Lyn… he was right there at our borders, already on his way to save us… and all I did… I flew right toward him, and I wasn't even paying attention to the Laus soldiers, and their archers saw me… and they… they fired at me, and I didn't even realize…"
"Florina! You could have been killed! You – I had no idea you…"
"I heard Lord Eliwood shouting at the last second, and looked over my shoulder, and all these arrows were flying toward me… I tried to move out of the way, but the maneuver to do so… well, it's hard to do, and I… I fell off of Huey…"
"Florina!" Lyn looked absolutely horrified. Florina nodded miserably.
"I would have died, I'm sure of it… I was so high up… but Hector… he caught me, and… and ever since, I've been meaning to tell him how happy I was that he did…"
"Mother Earth and Father Sky…" Lyn breathed, staring at her friend.
"And I guess that whole time, while I was watching him, I was too afraid to tell him… but I watched him all those times…" Florina smiled, her eyes misting over with her memories. "And he was so… strange, I thought. He was so grumpy all the time, but he was so nice, too… and he'd joke around with Lord Eliwood, and grump at Serra when she was around… but when he made her cry, he'd apologize and get all upset… but he'd pretend not to be. He'd yell and complain about Matthew and Oswin, too… but I could tell how much he cared for them all, and I thought… if he cared about me that same way… I'd be really happy… but he never even knew I existed…"
"Oh, Florina…" Lyn shook her head, nearly brought to tears again by this story. "Yes, he did. I… oh, I don't know how to tell you this… Hector, he noticed you hovering around him all the time. I thought he was crazy… I didn't see it at all…" Lyn closed her eyes. "He came up to me one day, looking about as annoyed as ever, and he asked me right out if I knew why you were always around him…"
"He… he did?" Florina looked up, surprised. "He noticed… me?"
"Of course he did. He said he'd even tried to ask you what you wanted to say once or twice, but you'd just run from him, in fact."
"Ah…" Florina blushed furiously, looking away. "Maybe once or twice," she mumbled softly.
"He wanted to know if I knew what it was all about, but of course I didn't… so he asked for advice on how to deal with you, and I told him he was crazy, and that he should stay away from you!"
"Oh…" Florina said softly, looking amazed to hear it.
"If I'd have just known…" Lyn made a frustrated noise, running a hand through her hair.
"I'm sorry…" Florina replied, her voice barely above a whisper. "It's all my fault…"
A soft tap at the door interrupted Lyn before she could reply, and she put on an annoyed face, glancing toward the sound.
"What is it? I told you, I didn't want any interruptions—"
"Lady Lyndis?" Kent's voice, from the other side of the door. Lyn blinked.
"Kent?" She opened the door to admit him, unable to keep the shock from her tone. "What are you… Oh, don't tell me… not now…"
"Ah… yes," Kent nodded, looking rather embarrassed.
"You've arrived with Hector, haven't you?" Lyn closed her eyes, feeling a headache coming on.
"…Yes. He's waiting for you outside…"
"I can't speak with him right now," Lyn decided, opening her eyes. "I can't. I… not now. If he insists on staying, go ahead and set him up, but I can't… not now."
"…I'll tell him," Kent nodded, glancing from Lyn to a very wide-eyed Florina, sitting so on the bed. "Lady Lyndis… are you all right?"
"…I'm fine," Lyn assured him. "Tell him."
"Of course," Kent bowed slightly, walking away, though not with a final concerned glance over his shoulder.
"Lyn… what are you going to do…?"
"I…" Lyn raised her hands to rub at her temples, shrugging helplessly. "I… I'm not sure, yet, Florina…"
"I… ah… I should go…"
"Where?" Lyn raised an eyebrow at her suspiciously.
"You need time to think…" Florina spoke quickly, embarrassed. "I'll leave you alone…"
"Nonsense, you don't have to leave—"
"I really would rather go," Florina replied, edging toward the door. "Lyn… I… I'm sorry for everything, I really am…"
"Stop apologizing… it's not your fault."
"You say that, but…"
"It's true."
Florina nodded.
"Okay." She glanced down the hall outside of the door, taking a deep breath. "Lyn, I'll be back later, okay?"
"…I'll be here…" Lyn sighed, allowing herself to fall backward onto her bed. Not just a headache… a bloody migraine to end them all, that's what was coming. She heard the door click shut as her friend let herself out; when she was certain she was out of earshot, she allowed herself a single, long, despairing groan.
Author's Note, Revisited!
Zed21 – I wouldn't say that, Serra has her fans… Sain and Erk, for example. Heh!
Kratos Aurion – The emotional conflicts are fun, but so are chapters like this, eh? Phew.
TheOneAndOnlyT – You're right, they are allowing numbers again. Thanks for the tip, hooray, I have my penname back! Heh.
AmbieChan – I don't mind if it takes you awhile to read, don't rush yourself on my account! I'd rather you had the time to really read it and enjoy it than just rushing yourself through. Thanks for the review, I appreciate it.
timmycheese – Oh dear. I'm hiding from you, now. Hope you don't mind… :)
Maquareion – I'm glad you liked 19 better. I hope you liked this one, too…
Evergladelord – Haha, I like that description of Farina. But really, she means well… she really does!
Silver's Shadow Tamer – Thanks for the review, though I'm not sure if this chapter really answered the question or not… heh.
Chellybean – I don't mind the randomness, really. Thanks for the review. :)
Angel White – I knew you were going to start hating Lyn. Yes, chapter of doom take two. Confrontations are so hard for me to write, and considering the name of this chapter, I think we can all see why this one was a little behind schedule. Oof.
FenixPhoenix – Matthew isn't too difficult to use, so long as you can think along his same lines… which might be hard, actually. I don't know, I like him a lot, so I find him fairly easy to use. Good luck with your fic. :)
Kitten Kisses – Actually, I wouldn't murder you. You deserve a break after all the hard work you put into your other reviews, eh? Ah-HAH, I was hoping I'd manage to convert you! And now you are two chapters behind again! Poor KK, I work you so hard… :)
krisslanza Ooh, a LynxFlorina fan. Yeah, this fic doesn't quite go there, I'm afraid, but I'm glad you decided to read anyway. :)
Schnickers – I hope the build up was dramatic enough for you! Eheh… and here's some more of what Lyn is thinking for good measure. Can't say much else, but you get the idea. Thank you so much for your review, you people that stick by me and this fic really keep me going.
Crimsy Mi-Chan – Ack, poor Farina! Don't be too hard on her, she's really only acting the way she feels is right… she might have an odd view of what that is, but she does men well, I promise! Thanks for your review!
Nayrugoddess – Yes, you've spelled suspense properly. :P Thank you for your review, though I can't comment much on your mini outline without giving too much away. :)
