Once again it was Lloyd who was the first to recover.

"Where the hell are we now?" he asked. Then he looked round. "Oh gods this looks like the grand square on earth."

"Your not wrong there mate," said a small man with an incredibly large suitcase. "Grand plaza, Harwell, Earth and the greatest place in the galaxy. 'Cept LAB of 'cause." The other Aerthians got up and spread out a little. The square was about 500ft wide and 600ft long; the first emperor was never very good at maths. The square had four main entrances, Grand avenue, Hadrian Plaza, Edward's grand road and Jeremy's street. In the middle of the square there was a statue of Hadrian in his younger years. No one much liked the statue but no one could bring themselves to do it. It was after all, solid gold.

The square was swarming with businessmen. The empire needed vast amounts of accountancy because of all the taxes swarming into the capital of the empire. The Empresses' grand palace (the emperor's was on LAB) was at the head of the square where all the small men with large briefcases were headed.

"I've always wanted to see the grand square," said the professor in awe of the detailed stonework of the buildings. "It's even true what they say. The streets are paved with gold."

"Actually sis its magnesium. Twenty times more valuable than gold." Said Virgil. "They must replace it every time it rains."

"Actually it doesn't rain here. The entire city has a glass roof." The elves looked round.

"Don't look at me," said Charlotte.

"Lloyd?" said The Professor astonished.

"What? I may not like school but I do pay attention," he said. "When I'm awake," he corrected himself.

"Well if you're so clever you get us out of here," said Virgil annoyed that someone he considered a bit of an idiot had thwarted his intelligence.

"This is earth right?" said Lloyd, he seemed to have already thought about it. "They have technology to take you anywhere. So we just catch a transport home."

"Yeah!" cried Charlotte and Virgil enthusiastically.

"That may not be as easy as it sounds," warned The Professor. "Earth nowadays isn't the same as it was 1000 years ago in your history books. It is now a tangle of red tape and regulations I used to know a man who went completely mad trying to find the main reception desk in his own building. We might not be able to get a transport for months years!"

"What!" The others were astonished. They had thought a planet with such powerful technology would easily be able to get them home. Little did they know of the situation. It took a permit to go to eat out of your own home nowadays. The only real way of getting off the planet these days was for you to highjack a transport owned by an old foegie who finally got a permit after applying at 17.

"My Dad had a friend who lived on earth we should go see him," said The Professor. "He lived in Amesbury"

"Amesbury!" said Virgil. "I know my geography and Amesbury is almost 100 miles from Harwell. It will take days to get there."

"Of cause not Virgil not be a birk," shouted The Professor. "This is Earth they have alternatives to walking. We'll take the Magnet train. We'll be there within the hour at least we would if it wasn't 12:59." The magnet train was emperor Fred XI only achievement. He had poured all the empires taxes in to the network of floating trains that crisscrossed all the major planets surfaces. It showed the LABick Empire's pure industrial power in that it only took 3 weeks to build. "The station is probably in the next street."

AUTHORS NOTE

Harwell is the capital of earth not the LABick Empire however Harwell is where the taxes are counted and it is in Harwell where LAB scientists conduct their experiments and mass-produce their super technology.