As promised, here is the second chapter. Wow… an update so soon? Isn't it a miracle? Arigato to all those who made the effort to click on the review button… I love you! As for everyone else…

Well, to continue my bitching and moaning, here is another public notice…

Note to all: I hate plagiarism. While it may be considered a compliment, to me, it is the most insulting compliment. Everyone works hard to create his or her own ideas and literature. Stealing is not nice. It is bad. Very bad. And I don't appreciate others stealing my work and republishing it as their own. I find it disgusting. I have found this form of insult thrown at me from various authors on various websites. I do not appreciate it. I do not find it complimentary or flattering. If you are guilty of this, do me a favor and stop. Or else I'll hunt you down myself and there'll be hell to pay.

Disclaimer: Gravitation is owned by Maki Murakami. The lyrics are from the song 'The Reason' by Hoobastank. I don't own shit- so don't sue me.

THAT'S WHY I NEED YOU TO HEAR- Verse 02:

"I'm sorry that I hurt you…"

I awoke the next day to the sensation of soft lips brushing across my ear and an even softer whisper in my ear.

He was speaking as though he knew I could hear him, but was sure I wouldn't remember a word he said once I awakened on my own.

Which is very true. When I finally arose from my bed to the early afternoon light, none of what he had said could be recalled. But I knew the gist of it… after all; it was the same every morning.

"Yuki, are you awake? Okay, well I'm going to work now. I'll be home later, so wait to eat with me. I love you."

The same words every single morning. And I only knew them because he had whispered them to me on the mornings where I was completely awake, yet too lazy to respond.

Sometimes I wonder if he knew that.

Sometimes I wondered if he knew he deserved better than what I offered him… the few remnants of my affection that I threw at his feet like leftovers.

And sometimes I wish I knew why I treated him the way I did.

"It's something I must live with everyday…"

After a refreshing shower, a steaming cup of coffee, and half a pack of cigarettes, I am ready to start my day. Making my way into my office, I power up my laptop and open the file containing my latest piece of literature.

My mind refuses to produce any type of inspiration for my new novel, so it begins to wander back to the drawer that holds the lyrics for Shuichi.

Unfinished words.

Slowly, I lean down to tug the drawer open. There, the spiral notebook lies atop a pile of random papers. I reach for it and pull the notebook out from its hiding place among my mess. I stare at the glossy cover that binds it together before turning the cover page over and viewing my progress written out in kanji.

I wince inwardly at the truth the lyrics held. They were my truth… my sins that I had finally confessed to a spiral bound notebook.

Sins that I should've confessed to the one whom I had sinned against…

Shuichi.

"And all the pain I put you through…"

Images of him flash before my eyes…

Him crying outside my door- begging for me to let him back in…

Him pouting after I criticized him music and talent…

Him frowning when I denied him simple things- like cuddling time and welcome home kisses…

Him trembling as he entered my hospital room…

Him biting back tears when I walked away from him- telling him that our relationship was over…

All memories of him. Memories that brought me a secret heartache. They were times when I had hurt him, times I regretted, yet never apologized for.

Why is it that images ingrained in my mind the deepest were the ones of him being hurt? Why is it that I never remember his smile first?

Ah, again- my guilty conscience.

"I wish that I could take it all away…"

I guess I knew all along that I had hurt him. But throughout the past four years we've been together, I began to realize that I didn't want to hurt him. And now more than ever, I regret making him cry.

Using my past as a barricade had become a habit for so long, I'd forgotten what it was like to let anyone inside my life. Even Mika, Tohma, and Tatsuha… they couldn't reach me either. Nobody could. Nothing could touch me anymore.

Or so I thought.

Until I met him.

Unlike my romance novels, it wasn't love at first sight. It wasn't even lust. It was some strange attraction… not in a sexual way. In a way that he caught my attention and didn't let go, even after I walked away from him.

Heh… maybe I was doomed from the start.

No- I shouldn't say that. If anything, I'm the lucky one. And him… I don't know why he stays by my side.

I wish I could take it back… all of it. All the times I made him cry.

"And be the one who catches all your tears…"

I hate myself for how I've treated him. I find my past behavior towards him… atrocious. He never deserved my abuse. He deserved much better…

Much better than me.

And he still does- deserve better than me, that is.

Every time I reminisce over our past, I yearn for the impossible… the chance undo all my mistakes.

Instead of making him frown, making him smile. Instead of making him cry, making him laugh. Acceptance instead of rejection. Warmth instead of coldness. Truth instead of lies.

The things I should have done… but never did.

"That's why I need you to hear…"

The more I think about the pain I brought him, the more I hate myself. And the more I realize that he'd be better off without me.

But what would I do without him?

The thought brings fear to the deepest part of my heart. I shudder at the threat. But then…

Is that what must happen for me to make retribution to him? For me to leave his life? is that the only way for me to stop hurting him?

My mind is racing as I contemplate the possibility.

Would I be willing to give him up so that he could live a better life without me?

I bite my lip as I stare unseeingly at the notebook in my hands.

After a few minutes of nothing but silent panic, I close my eyes and reopen then to reread my work.

I take up my pen from my desk and quickly scribble the second verse of the song in kanji.

After I finish, I toss the notebook on top of my desk and rise from my chair.

I turn and leave my office and stride into the hall to slip on my shoes.

Lighting a cigarette as I close the front door behind me, I inhale the smoke deeply as I exit the building.

I know what I have to do.

The only thing going through my head are the final words I had written for Shuichi's song…

"I'm sorry that I hurt you

It's something I must live with everyday

And all the pain I put you through

I wish that I could take it all away

And be the one who catches all your tears

That's why I need you to hear…"

TBC…

Ah… so fun! I love torturing Yuki… it's so easy to do! Well let me know if you like how this fic is going and any ideas you may have. I love feedback! I love reviews! So onegai review na no da!