Author's Note: Well, thanks for the responses to the first two chapters – I'm glad that people are finding this amusing!! Special thanks to saz, Star 07, Assena, AngelMouse5, Willow Tracy, Raliena, Miss Elizabeth Blakeney, Cap'n Phoenix, mcj, HyperCaz, zeilfanaat, and wildcat2006 for reviewing!

Gordon didn't waste time once he was out of the house – he knew that Scott would probably persuade the others to at least have a look for him, and he had better not be caught. He headed straight up into the bushland, figuring that it was best to go directly to his mountain hideaway. None of his brothers could track him in the day, let alone at night.

He heard a door slam behind him and increased the length of his strides, making it to the safety of the bushes just before his older brothers turned the outside lights on. See you in a week, he thought, tipping his – imaginary – hat at his brothers before slipping off into the night.

"You know, John," Scott commented as they walked outside, "has anyone ever told you that you can sound frightening like Dad when you want to?"

John smirked. "You're the first." He shrugged. "It's a gift."

Virgil choked back a laugh. "Yeah, right."

"You two snapped to attention pretty damn quick, I'm telling you that. Never seen you move so fast … except when Dad yells of course."

"Shut up, John."

They searched through the edges of the bushland for another few minutes, but quickly arrived at the conclusion that it was no use.

"He's gone," Virgil said. "No way we'll be able to find him, especially not in the dark. We can have another look tomorrow morning."

Scott nodded. "OK … he'd better come back before Dad calls …" He smiled. "I sure as hell won't be covering for him!"

John nodded. "Neither will I."

Virgil nodded. "It's a deal." He grinned. "I hope Dad rings early tomorrow morning," he added, grinning evilly.

"You and me both, little brother," Scott answered, ruffling Virg's hair as they walked back into the house. "You and me both …"

Damn my head hurts …

Alan tried to move, but gave up on the attempt when the pain in his head left him dizzy.

Ok think … where am I?

A bleary-eyed survey of his surroundings led him to the conclusion that he was in his own room. He moved again, and managed to get himself into a sitting position, leaning against the wall.

His eyes widened in alarm as he remembered the events of the previous night. Oh boy … I'm dead. Where is Gordon? He thought suddenly, noticing his brother's empty bunk. If he's left me to deal with this on my own …

Alan continued in this train of thought, planning Gordon's comeuppance, torture, and violent death, until he was interrupted by John's entrance. To his surprise – and alarm – his older brother smiled at him.

"Nice to see you awake, sleeping beauty," John remarked. He threw the curtains open, and Alan winced, glowering at his smirking brother. "How do you feel?"

"Just fine," Alan retorted angrily.

John raised one eyebrow curiously. "Oh good, in that case you won't mind me putting some music on then …"

He moved towards Gordon's stereo. "No!" Alan yelled quickly. "No … I've got a headache," he finished lamely.

John laughed. "No kidding. Get up."

"But –"

"Get up."

With a grumbled, "OK!" Alan dragged himself off the bed. "Now what?"

"Come with me, squirt." John held Alan's arm to support him down the stairs to their father's study. Scott and Virgil were waiting grimly.

"So, Alan," Scott said, once John had dropped their youngest brother on the lounge, "care to explain yourself?"

"Uh … actually, I think I'll pass on that, thanks Scott," Alan retorted.

"Alan," Virgil said quietly. He did not speak with a raised voice, he did not slam his hand on the table angrily. Nothing about his posture or tone implied a threat, or that his brother's swift and violent death would follow very quickly if he did not immediately answer Scott's question … but Alan understood perfectly well that all of the above would follow unless he answered Scott and was extremely quick about it.

"Um … sorry," Alan said.

"Dad rang this morning," John said from his post, leaning against the wall near the desk.

Alan could hear alarm bells going off. "What did you tell him?" he asked nervously.

Scott smiled innocently … too innocently. "We told him about the … excellent night we had last night."

Alan found himself speechless with horror. He looked from one of his brothers to the next, seeing all the confirmation he needed in the smirks that adorned their faces. "What … ev-everything?"

Virgil nodded. "You bet."

I will not panic … I will not panic … I will not start screaming and bashing my head into the desk …

"That's a very convincing fish impersonation you're doing there, Alan," John remarked, laughing. Alan didn't even try to come up with a come-back. He was too horrified by what his brothers had done.

"Is he …"

"He's mad," John informed him, too happily. "Needless to say, you and Gordo are in for it when he gets home, and we have his permission to handcuff you guys to the television aerial in a thunderstorm if you cause any more problems."

Gordo … "Where is Gordo?" Alan asked, noticing that his partner in crime was missing. Scott's face darkened.

"He got away last night."

Alan grinned. "Too quick for you you old guys, eh?"

He regretted the words the moment they passed his lips. Scott gave him a death glare, and John started cracking his knuckles. Virgil on the other hand smiled. "Well, little brother, apparently he was … but trust me, that's not a good thing for you. Because all it means is that you have to clean up the remainder of our room on your own."

Alan growned. "But …"

John cracked his knuckles one last threatening time, and Alan conceded. "OK."

Gordon decided that he could get very used to this. He had made it to his secret cave within ten minutes, and had gotten safely inside. It could be a little difficult to get into, being located behind a waterfall, but the view from behind it was well worth the trouble. He had discovered it one day after John had dared him to dive off the top of the waterfall; he had been swept under the surface when he got to the bottom, and had ended up in the cave. Before he could explore it much, though, he heard John's panicked voice yelling, "Gordon! Gordon!" Realising that his brother thought he had drowned, Gordon quickly made his way out and to the bank. John had been too relieved to see his brother alive to ask where Gordon had been, and the confused descriptions given by the two boys of their adventures did not allow the others to properly understand the situation sufficiently to question the length of time Gordon had disappeared for.

Gordon had kept the cave as his 'little secret' for years; not even Alan knew for sure of its existence. He had suspicions – Gordon knew this for a fact – but he had never been able to find it or to force the truth out of Gordon.

Gordon sat back with a contented sigh. Over time, he had managed to bring a few creature comforts – like a supply of food – into his hidden cave, in case of emergencies … like the one he found himself in at the present time. He had no doubt about the intentions of his older brothers if they were to find him – he would be facing some monster payback, that was for sure. And if their father …

Gordon choked on his drink. Dad!

He distinctly remembered his father promising to ring Scott to talk to him about the soccer match. Oh boy … and they were mad at us too … what if they've told Dad everything? Oh boy … oh boy …

He considered his options carefully. I can go back to the house and give myself up. Hmm … that would be fun! They'd kill me … I could try to find Alan and ask him what's been happening … but he's probably mad at me, and he could give me up to them. Not an option … but I have to know if Dad's called! Only other option is to stay up here for the whole week … but no … can't do that … Dad will get mad at me …

His father had strictly forbidden Gordon to go camping on his own after the boy had nearly been burnt alive in a bushfire six months previously. Only dumb luck had saved Gordon from the flames that he had failed to see as he had been sleeping … and as John was later heard to comment, Gordon's run of dumb luck was likely to continue. The exchange – as Gordon recalled – went something like this:

Scott: [shaking his head as Gordon was driven away in an ambulance] That was sheer dumb luck that he survived. John, how can you be smiling?!

John: [smirking] Well, look at it this way: he was dumb to go out there, and he's still dumb now … so I'd say the 'dumb luck's gonna last, eh?

Gordon shook his head with a long-suffering grin, however it quickly faded as his thoughts returned to his current situation. Without doubt, he was in serious trouble.

Better go back down and find out how bad it is, he decided with a sigh. Here goes nothing …

Alan's day had just gone from worse to even worse. Having successfully managed to clean the remainder of his brother's room in just under an hour – he wasn't sure if the quality of the clean-up was up to scratch, but he was sure it was good enough to pass him – he had wandered down to the kitchen looking for lunch, but unfortunately, Virgil had caught him.

Now he found himself locked outside and under orders to clean the pool. Virgil had not taken kindly to Alan's insistant exclamations that he had finished, but was forced to concede when saw that his room did indeed look clean. However, any hope Alan had of an easy afternoon evapourated when Scott commented casually that the pool looked dirty. Virgil had agreed – grinning evilly – and Alan had been sent outside.

He had been working half-heartedly for about fifteen minutes when he heard a soft sound from the undergrowth nearby; he turned abruptly to face Gordon. His eyes widened in shock. "Gordo, what are you doing?"

"Pleased to see you too," Gordo retorted. "What's happening?"

"They're still mad," Alan informed him. "And they're talked to dad."

Gordon groaned. "And they told him …"

"Everything."

"We're dead."

"My thoughts exactly."

"And it's your fault."

"Now wait just a minute," Alan protested, a little too loudly.

Gordon grabbed his arm, eyes flashing in alarm. "Alan, be –"

"And what have we here?" asked a – very amused – voice from the other side of the pool. Alan and Gordon looked over to find John watching them. Gordon shot a death glare at Alan as he released his arm.

" 'We'?" he echoed. "You and who else?" he enquired.

"Me, Scott, and Virgil," John replied, grinning.

"Actually, Johnny," Gordon corrected, "that would be 'Scott, Virgil, and I'. Did you flunk English at school?" He grinned cheekily, knowing that that would drive John mad.

John glared. "Gordon, look at it this way – you are dead. I, on the other hand, have been a good boy."

Alan attempted to stifle his laughter … unsuccessfully. "You … a 'good boy'?" he echoed incredulously. "You are so lucky that Gordo and I haven't told Dad about that time you took his car and –"

"Alan, that was an accident!" John protested loudly.

"I thought I'd die laughing," Gordon smiled, taking up the story, "when they told Scott that you might be charged with – what was it? Indecent exposure? Disturbing the peace?"

"Gordon!" John yelled, his face red with embarrassment.

"It was indecent exposure," Alan told Gordon, grinning. "Though mind you, it was humiliating for us; being the brothers of the Robson Street Turkey was very embarrassing, you know."

"Alan Tracy, I will –"

"Though," Gordon continued, speaking over John's protests, "Johnny did prove that he can do a mean turkey impersonation!"

"Right, that is it!" John yelled. "You two –"

"How many had you put away by that point, John?" Alan asked innocently.

John took a few deep breaths, trying to ignore the raucous laughter of his younger – soon to be dead – brothers. "OK, you two," he said, forcing himself to calm down. "You wanna play it that way? Scott! Virgil!" he yelled, grinning as he saw his brother's faces fall. "What's the matter, squirts? Something wrong?"

"Uh, Johnny … you know we didn't mean any of that, right?" Alan asked nervously.

John nodded, smiling unconvincingly. "Oh, sure I know that Alan. Scott! Virgil! But you know, I think this joke's so good that we can't keep it to ourselves, can we, huh squirts?" he finished, his tone slightly menacing. He glanced over as Scott and Virgil appeared. "Hi guys," he said, "look who I found."

"Forgive and forget?" Gordon offered as the five brothers sat in the lounge room. He was greeted with an incredulous snort from Virgil. "Look," he continued, "we've got dirt on you guys, you've got dirt on us … can't you just tell Dad you made it up?"

John grinned. "You think he'll believe us?"

Gordon conceded the point. "OK, so he won't … but in that case, Dad's gonna kill us at the end of the week anyway – can you guys lay off us till then?"

Scott cocked his head to one side. "Now why would we want to do that?"

Alan smiled. "Because we've got enough dirt on you guys to get you grounded for the rest of your lives."

Virgil laughed nervously. "Oh really?" he challenged.

"Hell yeah," Gordon retorted. "We've got the Robson Street Turkey incident for John –" Alan, Scott and Virg snickered at that, and John shot them a death glare "– and as for Virgil; don't think that you can hide the fact that you spent two thousand dollars on music videos a few months ago."

"That isn't so bad," John conceded, before noticing Virgil's cheeks slowly turning red, "or is it …" he finished, looking curiously at Virgil. Scott turned to Virgil, frowning slightly.

"You know what was on these so-called 'music videos'?" Gordon asked innocently.

"You said you wouldn't tell!" Virgil exclaimed, pointing furiously at Gordon. "And yet you've already told him!" He gestured furiously at Alan.

Gordon smirked. Scott sent Virgil a look that clearly said 'We will be discussing this later'. Alan patted Virgil on the arm. "It's OK, Virg. Wasn't anything I'd never seen before."

John's jaw hit the floor. Scott sent another death-look at Virgil. "Just what kind of music videos were these, Virg?" John asked incredulously.

"It was a mistake, OK?" Virgil yelled, flustered. "Can we move on please?"

Alan took pity on his – obviously distressed – brother, and turned to Scott. Scott – noticing that Alan was now regarding him with a look similar to that of the proverbial cat – backed away nervously. Alan laughed. "Why the guilty look?" Gordon asked. "Got something to hide, Mr Scott 'I-am-a-perfect-child' Tracy?" He gestured towards Alan. "Like to do the honours, little bro?"

Alan grinned. "With pleasure." He coughed to clear his throat, then paused for dramatic effect. "Virgil, John, you may not be aware of our older brother's 'dark side'. When he was 15, he –"

"OH NO YOU DON'T!" Scott yelled, suddenly realising which story Alan and Gordon had discovered about him.

Alan's face broke out into a wondering smile. "So, Gordo, that story really is true!"

Gordon nodded, and held out his hand. "Pay up! That'll teach you to doubt me …"

"My wallet's in my room, I'll give you twenty later. Gordon told me that story, and I didn't believe him, you see," he explained to the three eldest brothers. He shook his head in wonder. "I never would have believed it of you, Scott!"

"Believed what?!" Virgil and John exclaimed together. Gordon winked knowingly, nodding at Scott, who looked a misture of shocked, horrified, and furious.

"I forbid you to say another word, Gordon Tracy!"

"But I haven't said anything!" Gordon protested. "It's Alan who's been telling Virgil and John about your wild escapade when you – ouch!"

Gordon landed on the couch as Scott tackled him. "One more word, little brother, and I really will call Dad," he threatened.

Gordon frowned suddenly, and noticed out of the corner of his eye, Alan straightened and regarding Scott curiously.

"Wait a minute …" he said slowly, as the penny dropped. "You didn't tell Dad?"

Virgil began beating his head against the sofa. John simply rolled his eyes to heaven and sighed deeply. Scott flushed a deep shade of red. "Well," he began, flustered, "in a manner of speaking, no, but –"

"You didn't tell Dad?!" Alan's voice was a mixture of pleasure, shock, and anger. "You mean – I did all that – you didn't call him –" he stuttered, incoherent. The thunderous look on his face, however, was perfectly coherent, and it was assuring Scott that his demise was to be a lot sooner than he had planned if he did not come up with a suitable explanation for this apparent anomaly in the story that he had told Alan, within the following five seconds.

"Uh … Virg, John … Help me out here guys …" Scott stammered, releasing Gordon and stepping back. "It was John's idea!" he revealed.

"Hey!" John protested loudly. "Don't – aw now come on, guys!" He too began backing away from his furious younger brothers. "Don't overreact!"

"Don't overreact?!" Gordon retorted incredulously. "Don't –" He broke off as the phone started to ring. All five brothers regarded it nervously. In the end Virgil took charge.

"If it's Dad," he said firmly, "not a word about any of this."

Scott nodded. "I agree … somehow I don't think he needs to know …"

"Definitely not," John agreed. "What about you two?"

Alan too nodded. "Yeah … I mean, he doesn't need to know everything, right?"

"Exactly," Gordon said, grinning. He walked over to the phone and checked the caller-ID. In that brief second, his hopes were shattered. This person would know whether they were lying or not. "Aw hell …" he whispered.

"What?" John asked.

"It's Grandma!"

Author's note: Well … should I continue, and see whether the boys are able to con Grandma? :-)

Thanks for the reviews; you guys are great!